The Official Funny Stuff Thread™
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@raceprouk said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@pleegwat said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@anonymous234 What is fabric softener for anyway.
Bleeding money from fools.
Not quite. It has two effects:
a) Indeed softening the fabric - with some types of fabric you otherwise get the "stiff like cardboard" effect. It also reduces electrostatic effects for some synthetic fabrics
b) It reduces the time it takes for the fabric to dry - which means that if you use a tumbledryer it will take a noticably smaller amount of time.
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@carrievs I believe it's because he's propagating a common myth about the dairy trade, but the reply chain is also pretty WTFy as well.
Regarding the myth that male calves are killed as they are no use:
http://ukcows.com/holsteinUK/publicweb/Education/HUK_Edu_DairyCows.aspx?cmh=66
Calves can be born throughout the year. When the calf has been born, the mother licks it to remove the birth fluids. The calf is normally able to stand within a few hours of birth and will drink Colostrum from the cow’s udder. Colostrum is a type of milk which the cow produces for the first 24 hours or so after giving birth; it protects the new-born calf from disease and provides vital anti-bodies.
In modern farming systems the calf is taken from its mother within a couple of days as she is needed to produce milk for sale. The farmer feeds the calf milk from a bucket for the next 6-8 weeks until it is weaned.
The calf must, by law, be identified with two tags which are inserted into each ear shortly after birth. Calves may be dehorned when they are a few weeks old. This procedure does not hurt the calf but stops the horns from developing and causing possible injury to other animals or humans.
Heifer (female) calves usually stay on the farm and are reared for entry into the milking portion of the herd whereas bull (male) calves are usually reared for beef. In exceptional cases where the bull is of superior genetic merit, it may be used for breeding.
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@zecc said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@Luhmann Yes, a focus group of women would have put a tamp on this.
They did! They were just aliens is all. After every trial the product came back with these odd stains, so the designers said, "fuck it!" and added it by default!
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@asdf said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Blame millennials for the vanishing bar of soap
Because clearly it's got nothing to do with the fact that pump dispensers are more convenient, don't slip out of your hands, and dispense a gel that covers the hands better.
I don't use liquid soap; it's way more expensive.
There was a thread on this, I swear!
IIRC bar soap was marginally cheaper per ounce, but I'd rather pay the premium than deal with residue...
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@doctorjones TIL. I thought that was true.
ically I suppose it still means the male calves are (eventually) slaughtered as a result of dairy farming, which could reasonably perturb a lacto-vegetarian.
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Paging @Onyx
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@luhmann
Their focus group was all feminists.
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@raceprouk said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Because clearly it's not because fabric softeners are being increasingly included in the detergent itself.
It's probably because I am physically allergic to fabric softener.
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@asdf said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@pjh said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Ok, someone like to tell me why explaining the joke got more votes than the actual joke?
The original joke was that the camouflage makes absolutely no sense if you're wearing a safety vest, wasn't it? @DoctorJones didn't explain the original joke, but added another joke on top of that.
If camouflage uniforms and safety vests cancel each other out, does that mean that they were basically parading around naked?
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@anonymous234 said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
https://www.wsj.com/articles/fabric-softener-sales-are-losing-their-bounce-1481889602
I'm 22 and I've never bought fabric softener. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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@anotherusername said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
If camouflage uniforms and safety vests cancel each other out, does that mean that they were basically parading around naked?
The NSFW thread is .
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@bb36e said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
I'm 22 and I've never bought fabric softener. ¯_(ツ)_/¯
I'm 55 and have never bought fabric softener.
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@ben_lubar said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@raceprouk said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Because clearly it's not because fabric softeners are being increasingly included in the detergent itself.
It's probably because I am physically allergic to fabric softener.
We have hard water, if we do not soften it, our clothes will feel like sandpaper. We just use a bit of vinegar instead, something like 90% cheaper, and does not contain perfume and shit.
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@dcon said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@bb36e said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
I'm 22 and I've never bought fabric softener. ¯_(ツ)_/¯
I'm 55 and have never bought fabric softener.
I'm E_NaN and I've never bought fabric softener.
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@swayde said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
does not contain perfume and shit.
Well no wonder nobody buys it! Who wants their clothes to smell like shit?
Filed under: Cologne isn't a deodorant, idiot!
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@swayde said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@ben_lubar said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@raceprouk said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Because clearly it's not because fabric softeners are being increasingly included in the detergent itself.
It's probably because I am physically allergic to fabric softener.
We have hard water, if we do not soften it, our clothes will feel like sandpaper. We just use a bit of vinegar instead, something like 90% cheaper, and does not contain perfume and shit.
We use vinegar as well.
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@tsaukpaetra said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Well no wonder nobody buys it! Who wants their clothes to smell like shit?
But seriously, who wants their clothes to stink like perfume all day?
I once spent a few minutes trying to figure out where that horrifying stench in our kitchen was coming from, before finding out it was the "scented" trash bags someone had bought.
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@anonymous234 said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
"scented" trash bags
Seriously? Who does that?
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@swayde said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
We have hard water, if we do not soften it, our clothes will feel like sandpaper. We just use a bit of vinegar instead, something like 90% cheaper, and does not contain perfume and shit.
I think you're confusing water softener and fabric softener there. They're different chemicals with different purposes.
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@jaloopa said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@pleegwat softening fabric
Correction: putting chemicals in your laundry that leave a thin, invisible waxy coating on the fabric to make it feel "soft".
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Silencer? Ha! I've got a loudencer.
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@bb36e Everything is "ifs". You can model a human brain with just a few (trillion) ifs and a single loop.
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@el_heffe the ideas thread is in another castle.
Btw, how do you do those arrows traditionally used to point to another thread without typing each one in manually? Is there a shortcut?
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@benjamin-hall
colon arrows colon
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@benjamin-hall said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@el_heffe the ideas thread is in another castle.
Btw, how do you do those arrows traditionally used to point to another thread without typing each one in manually? Is there a shortcut?
What, you mean like this?
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@bb36e said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
I'm 22 and I've never bought fabric softener.
I'm… umm… rather more than that, and I've never bought fabric softener either.
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@anonymous234 said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
You can model a human brain with just a few (trillion) ifs and a single loop.
You need more than that. There's probably about a quadrillion synapses in the brain. (And real brain models use a lot of smaller loops; around 100 billion of them for a full human model. Nobody's scaled up to that level yet. I don't think anyone's even reached the billion neuron mark yet.)
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@el_heffe said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Silencer? Ha! I've got a loudencer.
Do you also have the attachment to shoot down police helicopters?
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Never look like a forgetful douchebag again. With Dude Calendar, you’ll have all your important dates at your fingertips. Plus get awesome, friendly reminders.
Fuck yeah! Instead of looking like a forgetful douchebag, I can just go back to looking like a regular douchebag instead!
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@masonwheeler said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@anonymous234 said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
"scented" trash bags
Seriously? Who does that?
The same people who scent doogy poop bags? Gawd, those things stink - the poop smells better! (I get unscented ones)
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@dcon said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
(I get unscented ones)
I get nappy bags, because they're ridiculously cheap in comparison, although they probably don't work too well for larger dogs
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@jaloopa said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@dcon said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
(I get unscented ones)
I get nappy bags, because they're ridiculously cheap in comparison, although they probably don't work too well for larger dogs
"nappy bag"? Googling shows me backpacks and purses... Those wouldn't be cheap - but would work for a very large dog!
Amazon, 1000 bags, 13.99US.
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@dcon said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
"nappy bag"? Googling shows me backpacks and purses... Those wouldn't be cheap - but would work for a very large dog!
Nappy is British for diaper.
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@jaloopa That makes more sense! :) And a lot cheaper than mine...
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@doctorjones wait what?
they are reinventing phone calendars?
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@swayde said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
We have hard water, if we do not soften it, our clothes will feel like sandpaper
That's not what fabric softener mitigates...
But 'd.
@benjamin-hall said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Btw, how do you do those arrows traditionally used to point to another thread without typing each one in manually? Is there a shortcut?
If you see something in a post that you want to know how to re-create, use the button to the bottom right of the post, next to the downvote button and select
View Raw
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@el_heffe said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mbeIlYOnWOY
Anyway..
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@pjh I love the fainting goats.
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@pjh said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
If you see something in a post that you want to know how to re-create, use the button to the bottom right of the post, next to the downvote button and select
View Raw
However, do keep in mind that the raw is UTF-8, and that Unicode snaginanehs are still possible...
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@pjh Yeah, I knew about that. Work is to posting. I was wondering if there's a way to do it without typing the individual emoji by hand. A macro-type shortcut. For some reason
:arrows:
didn't autocomplete for me...now it does. Because .
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This landing page is funny:
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