The Official Status Thread
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@Tsaukpaetra said in The Official Status Thread:
What does thinking have anything to do with trying?
No wonder ... if you don't even try
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"Status:" faailyour compfhsion modole rquest rebut immedkdjaly 💬 input fa ure
Imminebt craszch detcdr beg dump..m///''""''"v ,.,••••§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§§¬…
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@Tsaukpaetra Oh dear...
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@Mikael_Svahnberg said in The Official Status Thread:
eroge.scr
Hey, if they could have porn on Atari 2600...
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Status: Obviously.
Update: Oh.
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Status: Fcuk you Google.
Edit: At least they can't stop me doing it via their API :D
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@Tsaukpaetra said in The Official Status Thread:
@accalia said in The Official Status Thread:
Status
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! IT BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURNS!
:this-is-fine.png:
oh goddess it gets worse...... i scripted the table as create to check something else about the structure and....... i found this.......
ALTER TABLE [SCHEMA].[SOME_RANDOM_TABLE] WITH NOCHECK ADD CONSTRAINT [CHECK_DATE1] CHECK ((datepart(hour,[DATE1]) = 0 and datepart(minute,[DATE1]) = 0 and datepart(second,[DATE1]) = 0 and datepart(millisecond,[DATE1]) = 0)) GO ALTER TABLE [SCHEMA].[SOME_RANDOM_TABLE] CHECK CONSTRAINT [CHECK_DATE1] GO ALTER TABLE [SCHEMA].[SOME_RANDOM_TABLE] WITH NOCHECK ADD CONSTRAINT [CHECK_TIME1] CHECK ((datepart(day,[TIME1]) = 1 and datepart(month,[TIME1]) = 1 and datepart(year,[TIME1]) = 1900)) GO ALTER TABLE [SCHEMA].[SOME_RANDOM_TABLE] CHECK CONSTRAINT [CHECK_TIME1] GO
i'm not sure if that makes this better or worse.....
on one hand they're making sure i can absolutely ignore the date/time portion of the fields as apropriate, on the other...... they had to create those constraints.....
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@accalia If you require a hammer, you can borrow one of mine ;)
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Only 14 days until I get my cast off.
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@RaceProUK said in The Official Status Thread:
@accalia If you require a hammer, you can borrow one of mine ;)
Pass, thanks. This one requires a personal touch.
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Status: Apparently, someone's parked a boat in our car park.
We do pre-booked airport parking.
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@accalia said in The Official Status Thread:
oh goddess it gets worse...... i scripted the table as create to check something else about the structure and....... i found this.......
ALTER TABLE [SCHEMA].[SOME_RANDOM_TABLE] WITH NOCHECK ADD CONSTRAINT [CHECK_DATE1] CHECK ((datepart(hour,[DATE1]) = 0 and datepart(minute,[DATE1]) = 0 and datepart(second,[DATE1]) = 0 and datepart(millisecond,[DATE1]) = 0)) GO ALTER TABLE [SCHEMA].[SOME_RANDOM_TABLE] CHECK CONSTRAINT [CHECK_DATE1] GO ALTER TABLE [SCHEMA].[SOME_RANDOM_TABLE] WITH NOCHECK ADD CONSTRAINT [CHECK_TIME1] CHECK ((datepart(day,[TIME1]) = 1 and datepart(month,[TIME1]) = 1 and datepart(year,[TIME1]) = 1900)) GO ALTER TABLE [SCHEMA].[SOME_RANDOM_TABLE] CHECK CONSTRAINT [CHECK_TIME1] GO
i'm not sure if that makes this better or worse.....
on one hand they're making sure i can absolutely ignore the date/time portion of the fields as apropriate, on the other...... they had to create those constraints.....
Hmmm, that doesn't properly convey how I feel …
No, that isn't quite right, either …
ROFLMAOL
Meh, close enough.
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if you can laugh at that....... are you looking for work?> because we've got an opening and i could sure use help with this legacy software crap.
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@accalia said in The Official Status Thread:
if you can laugh at that....... are you looking for work?> because we've got an opening and i could sure use help with this legacy software crap.
I can laugh at that because (1) it isn't me, and (b) when you deal with shit like that on a regular basis, all you can do is go mad or laugh. Or both. Both is an option.
I do happen to be searching for work, but unless your company is willing to offer relocation or telecommuting, I don't think it would work out. ;)
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@abarker said in The Official Status Thread:
Both is an option.
I'm rapidly approaching that point
@abarker said in The Official Status Thread:
I do happen to be searching for work, but unless your company is willing to offer relocation or telecommuting, I don't think it would work out.
Well i'll be honest, it's a full time midlevel position, no idea if there's relocation budget, and telecommuting's possible but not likely (at least at first, after burn in is quite probably workable) If you're actually (or still?) interested PM me and i'll hook you up with the full details..
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@JazzyJosh said in The Official Status Thread:
Status: Obfuscated snapshot from one of my personal spreadsheets:
I may or may not have an old spreadsheet that looks the exact same, except for online casinos.
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Status: Wondering why I'm getting 5623896739065789052879305 upvote notifica- Oh, @Tsaukpaetra just came online
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status
Hey Lorne will you have time to work on that performance-increase project today?
Like I say every day-- yes-- if I can get uninterrupted time to get into deep-thought on it.
{1 hours of unrelated stuff later}
Okay, let's see if I can do this.
{spends 15-30 minutes just getting back up to speed on where I left off}
Okay, now...
BEEP BEEP U HAVE MEETING NOW LOL
motherfucker. What meeting?
PHONE CALL! YOU ALREADY TOLD PM EVERYTHING SHE NEEDS TO KNOW BUT U STILL ON CALL LOL!
Fuck.
{go to meeting, client doesn't show, go back to desk}
Okay, where was I?
{15-30 minutes just putting the pieces back together}
Hey need your thought on this
{describes an issue with a third party product, that dozens of thought-hours have already gone into, that is outside of my domain of knowledge}
Umm-- I don't know?
OK
{it is now 12:30, I'm hungry, and posting here}PRODUCTIVE DAY SO FAR HUH?!?!?
edit
Really? Unless you're , who the fuck is downvoting a status post?
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@Lorne-Kates said in The Official Status Thread:
Like I say every day-- yes-- if I can
get uninterrupted timestop myself from posting on WTDWTF to get into deep-thought on it.
{1 hours ofunrelatedWDTWTF stuff later}FTFY
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@TimeBandit said in The Official Status Thread:
@Lorne-Kates said in The Official Status Thread:
Like I say every day-- yes-- if I can
get uninterrupted timestop myself from posting onWTDWTFTotally Not Porn Site to get into deep-thought on it.
{1 hours ofunrelatedWDTWTFTotally Not Porn Site stuff later}FTFY
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Status: I've got a novel idea on how to store arrays of strings.
I'll use an array.
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Status: We used C#'s XmlSerializer. I told them it would be better to do it ourselves, per class, with linq to XML, but they thought that sounded repetitive. Now we're at the mercy of XmlReader and it's annoying over-reliance on you putting things into the correct position (If you don't, it silently stops deserializing the class.).
So now we have random phone numbers disappearing, and I don't know why :(
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@PleegWat said in The Official Status Thread:
Status: I've got a novel idea on how to store arrays of strings.
I'll use an array.
I'll use a novel. Each chapter is one string.
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@Magus
Just replace them all with 867-5309, what could go wrong?
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@RaceProUK said in The Official Status Thread:
Oh, @Tsaukpaetra just came
Hello! And thank you for activating your Tsaukpaetra Corp. Persecom Model N89!
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@Maciejasjmj Dude on the right be like, "Why do I have to be in front of the furry?"
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@izzion Millions of dollars. I'm not even kidding.
Well, at least for the app we wrap; our thing isn't even on sale yet, so I guess it isn't as bad, but still...
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Status: Good Jorb, NodeBB!
I know it's probably because of the "collapse multiple notifications of the same type into one" thing, but, seriously?
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@Tsaukpaetra
No, that would be because you have the Status Thread open in a browser somewhere (causing "replies" and "mentioned you" notifications to be marked read), and don't have the other two open anywhere.
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@izzion said in The Official Status Thread:
@Tsaukpaetra
No, that would be because you have the Status Thread open in a browser somewhere (causing "replies" and "mentioned you" notifications to be marked read), and don't have the other two open anywhere.It should look like this:
Nominally, it should always display at least five unread, regardless of how many read there are.
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Status: Just indulged in a bit of nostalgia.
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Status: This week's episode of Angry DBA is about data types.
Please add column UsesFooForBar (
varchar(3)
) to the table Baz.
What's the column for? What values will it be populated with?
The values will be "Yes" or "No".
Then it should be a bit.
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Since 12:30, excluding lunch, I've been interrupted 3 times-- each time at a moment of "what if I try X and Y and Z but with B and Q and... {poof}".
Fucking hell.
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@Lorne-Kates Print, frame and hang.
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/25009451/ProgrammerInterrupted.pdf
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@antiquarian said in The Official Status Thread:
Then it should be a bit.
But, you can't fit FILE_NOT_FOUND in a bit !
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@antiquarian said in The Official Status Thread:
Status: This week's episode of Angry DBA is about data types.
Please add column UsesFooForBar (
varchar(3)
) to the table Baz.
What's the column for? What values will it be populated with?
The values will be "Yes" or "No".
Then it should be a bit.
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Status: WTFOMGBBQWARGHLBALARG!
How the FUCK has this website been operating for TWO YEARS without an account manager screen for user accounts?!?!?
Like, what. the. Fuck!
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@Tsaukpaetra I don't get it.
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@antiquarian said in The Official Status Thread:
@Tsaukpaetra I don't get it.
Yes.
Should watch Tron.
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@Tsaukpaetra said in The Official Status Thread:
How the FUCK has this website been operating for TWO YEARS without an account manager screen for user accounts?!?!?
I know: Manually created records in the database !
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@TimeBandit said in The Official Status Thread:
@Tsaukpaetra said in The Official Status Thread:
How the FUCK has this website been operating for TWO YEARS without an account manager screen for user accounts?!?!?
I know: Manually created records in the database !
Highly likely. I mean, why make an interface for that when you have GOD privleges on the production database?!?
In other news, the cloud.example.com site is now considered "dev", and I'm making a new one for the "production" without all this junk going on...
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@Tsaukpaetra said in The Official Status Thread:
why make an interface for that
phpMyAdmin is an interface for that
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@TimeBandit said in The Official Status Thread:
@Tsaukpaetra said in The Official Status Thread:
why make an interface for that
phpMyAdmin is an interface for that
It's an ASP.Net site. Not sure if phpMyAdmin connects to SQL Server.
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Status: I doubt I will ever cease to be amused at clients who want detailed explanations for everything.
"What went wrong with #SYSTEM?"
I usually come up with a decent way of explaining it without going in to too much geekspeak. But, what I really want to do is ask: "If I tell you, are you even going to understand? How about we save each other my awkward explanation and then you don't have to nod and pretend you comprehend?"
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@flabdablet said in The Official Status Thread:
@Lorne-Kates Print, frame and hang.
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/25009451/ProgrammerInterrupted.pdf
2 more interruptions since. I'm sorely tempted to do just that.
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@Lorne-Kates said in The Official Status Thread:
@flabdablet said in The Official Status Thread:
@Lorne-Kates Print, frame and hang.
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/25009451/ProgrammerInterrupted.pdf
2 more interruptions since. I'm sorely tempted to do just that.
*hangs poster* *proceeds to work*
15 minutes later
*head in door* What's this mean?
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@dcon said in The Official Status Thread:
hangs poster proceeds to work
15 minutes later
head in door What's this mean?And then 30 minute after that, someone will knock/call/email since the poster applies to everyone else, and they're the exception obviously.
And 30 minutes after that...
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@Lorne-Kates said in The Official Status Thread:
And 30 minutes after that...
That's when my co-worker leaves to go home and work.