The Official Funny Stuff Thread™
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@pie_flavor said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@doctorjones "I will kill you so hard, you will die to death!"
Neat trick. You triggered in me a flashback to an episode of Gomer Pyle where Gomer keeps repeating "he's gonna kill me, he's gonna kill me dead!"
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@doctorjones
Reminds me of:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H73L7M0xsnM
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I guess Maria is giving her son a hint to start washing his own cloths
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@karla Can't hurt (unless he sprinkles holy water onto the contacts)
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@benjamin-hall If he does that, he'll let out the demonic magic smoke, which powers the servers.
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@chozang said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
I think if you randomly picked an OS to recommend, your friends and colleagues would soon stop asking you for recommendations.
Always recommending Linux would have the same effect and is much simpler.
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@jbert said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@karla Fake news!
It's at least from 2015:
Also, never try driving out daemons with holy water:
Least I didn't post it in "In other news today".
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@chozang said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@bb36e said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
21 people got that?
Nope. 22.
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@obeselymorbid said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Is Diane a walking thesaurus?
Also,
s/was/were
for proper use of the subjunctive.
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@jbert said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@karla Fake news!
It's at least from 2015:
Also, never try driving out daemons with holy water:
https://www.youtube.com/embed/-KFvug_maWU?v=3&start=87&end=113
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@obeselymorbid said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
If I was in a war zone and I got a card from a six year old saying "thank you for fitting in the whore", that would cheer me up more than the correctly-spelled version would.
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~/Projects/asterisk 15.2* ❯ cat include/asterisk/strings.h | grep SENSE_OF_HUMOR -A 3 #ifdef SENSE_OF_HUMOR #define ast_strlen_real(a) (a) ? strlen(a) : 0 #define ast_strlen_imaginary(a) ast_random() #endif
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@Onyx PHP has a C preprocessor‽
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@ben_lubar And this classic
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=17w6SZc0Y9s
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@ben_lubar said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
If I was in a war zone and I got a card from a six year old saying "thank you for fitting in the whore", that would cheer me up more than the correctly-spelled version would.
People I know who have served in the military spent a lot of their free time fitting in whores.
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@onyx said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
#define ast_strlen_real(a) (a) ? strlen(a) : 0
Shouldn't that be
#define ast_strlen_real(a) ((a) ? strlen(a) : 0)
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@el_heffe That would be a rather gruesome end... At least I'd let them pick the scorpion pit first.
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@zecc, the bad jokes thread is
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: When I try to unlock my Mac, it takes a while to be ready to accept input. I start typing my password, but invariably get the first attempt wrong, because there's no obvious way of telling when it's ready to accept input, and will silently ignore some characters, even when the UI appears to be ready.
: Just bash the command key a bunch of times until you see the UI change, then you'll be able to log in without a problem.
: Or you could do a keymash and fail the first login attempt on purpose. It'll work fine on your second attempt.Fucking hell, how do Mac fanbois put up with this shit?
Bonus lols:
: As others have suggested, wake it up with "shift". Do not drum the shift key, or you'll be unhappy everytime you wake a Windows machine.
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@doctorjones Starting from a black screen Linux is the only OS where you can just type your password, hit enter and be logged in. Both macOS and Windows need to be nudged and get ready to accept input before the password can be typed. Or in the case of Windows Enterprise where you have to hit the magic incantation of Ctrl+Alt+Del too before you're allowed to log in.
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@atazhaia said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Or in the case of Windows Enterprise where you have to hit the magic incantation of Ctrl+Alt+Del too before you're allowed to log in.
That's configurable. (I don't.)
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@atazhaia said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Or in the case of Windows Enterprise where you have to hit the magic incantation of Ctrl+Alt+Del too before you're allowed to log in.
Tsss. That is old skool dude. Get your complaining into this century and onto Windows 10 already.
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@luhmann Which still runs the magic Ctrl+Alt+Del combo. Or at least my company has it on by default for... reasons. I dunno why. All I know is that the central IT department is incompetent.
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@atazhaia said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
the magic incantation of Ctrl+Alt+Del
Or the Windows Security button. Whatever that is. Not limited to enterprise versions; it can be turned on or off in the group policy editor in all editions except home, all the way back to XP.
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@pleegwat I'm just too lazy to turn it off, as I mainly use Linux at work. So it doesn't happen often enough that it'll bother me. Although if we decide to take control of our own Windows images I'll petition the removal of it globally.
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@atazhaia I restrict the number of things I change in the policy editor to the bare minimum, lest someone out there finds out we have access and rectifies that.
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@atazhaia said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Or at least my company has it on by default
Yes. It isn't the OotB setting.
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@luhmann said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@atazhaia said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Or at least my company has it on by default
Yes. It isn't the OotB setting.
Really? I've had to slap it off in group policy on every domain I've set up so far...
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@pleegwat We've also talked about setting a sane policy for Windows updates, as right now they do can happen at bad times for anyone.
: Try rebooting your computer, see if that fixes your issues.
: Installing updates. Please wait...
: ...I'll be back in an hour.I lost 3 hours of work one day to Windows installing the FCU on my computer. Fun times...
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@atazhaia said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@doctorjones Starting from a black screen Linux is the only OS where you can just type your password, hit enter and be logged in. Both macOS and Windows need to be nudged and get ready to accept input before the password can be typed. Or in the case of Windows Enterprise where you have to hit the magic incantation of Ctrl+Alt+Del too before you're allowed to log in.
Yes, and that sounds reasonable.
If you actually read what I wrote (and what's in the QA that I linked to); Mac OS needs a nudge, and then there is an indeterminate amount of time, within which it will silently reject user input (even after the UI appears to be ready), causing your first password attempt to fail. Rather than offering a fix for the problem, other users say the only resorts are hacky workarounds including " just get the first attempt wrong".
I can't believe how user hostile that is. It's almost as if it were engineered by the team.
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@doctorjones said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
and then there is an indeterminate amount of time, within which it will silently reject user input, causing your first password attempt to fail.
Most of the time it actually works. I'll wake it up, type my password and enter, and it'll take a few seconds before it appears to do anything, but then it logs me in just fine. Sometimes it fails, but that's the exception rather than the rule.
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@chozang said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@tsaukpaetra said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@chozang said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Well, WTDWTF denizens can go over and complain about Discourse, which they can no longer do here.
Who told you that? The discopocalypse thread is still going pretty strong...
I just assumed... I guess they're all suffering from post-Discourse-stress-syndrome.
The time to not (overtly) complain about Discourse, was when we were actually using it.
HTH, HAND....
@pleegwat said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Or the Windows Security button. Whatever that is.
?
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@doctorjones I'll doublecheck when I get home, but my normal procedure with my Mac is that I give it a poke, wait until I get a picture and then typing the password works fine. I have not encountered it ignoring characters. But I'll make sure to start typing as soon as I see the input box this time, see how it goes.
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@Atazhaia @DoctorJones I've seen it not recognize the first few characters, I've seen it work fine once the screen's on. More often than barfing on the password is it taking tens of seconds to actually get through the login process (with a spinner on the greyed-out login screen). My windows box is instant as soon as the last key of the pin is pressed (if I used a password that'd be enter).
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@benjamin-hall said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
My windows box is instant as soon as the last key of the pin is pressed (if I used a password that'd be enter).
That's because it's actually just closing the lockscreen program and not actually secure
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@atazhaia said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Starting from a black screen Linux is the only OS where you can just type your password, hit enter and be logged in.
This is not true at all. When you get to the lock screen, you have to fiddle with it before it will let you type your password, just like Windows or Mac OS. (Exactly how depends on which version you're using.)
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@masonwheeler Ok, then.
Starting from a black screen some Linux
is the only OS wheredistros you can just type your password, hit enter and be logged in.