Speaking of frozen bassoons reminds me of this, and since we're in the dad jokes topic anyway:
The piccolo was invented in a coastal region of Italy where the local birds have very high-pitched songs, which over time has led to those high registers becoming a common feature of the folk music of the human residents. Many years ago, the locals hit upon an idea to make such sounds more available for performance.
Early each summer, all the villagers go down to the beach and dig pits in the sand in which they build fires and place huge copper pans. The pans are filled with a very pure grade of olive oil and raised to the boiling point, at which time bags of wooden flutes are carefully stirred into the boiling oil.
The wood absorbs the hot oil, causing the flutes to shrink until, ideally, they're about half their original size, raising the pitch of each instrument a full octave above its original range. This is how the piccolo originally came to be.
The festival is still carried out to this day, where it has become known as the "Mediterranean flute-fry".