Tinder is shit
-
@lucas1 said in Tinder is shit:
Tinder is awesome
Oh great, @GodEmperor is back. Fucking hell.
@lucas1 said in Tinder is shit:
I got my dick sucked for a coffee and a chat.
- If your dick is dispensing coffee, see a doctor
- If someone only drinks dick-coffee, have them see a doctor
- If she can chat while sucking your dick, either she's doing it wrong, or you are waaaaay too tiny, you micro-penised fuck.
-
-
Tinder Alternative Mating Strategy:
Insanity.
-
My husband is always hard
-
-
@boomzilla There is a trend of people "marry themselves" ... it used to be a slur to say someone was married to their right hand. These days people are arguing it is preferrable.
Basically something like Filth is occurring in everyday society.
-
Tinder suffers sign-in problems following Facebook's privacy changes
Virtual romance has run into a momentary setback -- Tinder has confirmed reports that many users can't sign into its dating service. Those affected are frequently stuck in a login loop where they're asked for extra Facebook permissions, only to be sent back to the original Facebook sign-in request...
Hookups are currently on hold.
-
Fucking amazing. They build a feature into the app specifically for this! And it's actually less good than people just putting it there! And it actually manages to auto detect what it's supposed to be based on what you wrote there but then overrides it!
-
@pie_flavor said in Tinder is shit:
They build a feature into the app specifically for this!
Specifically for what, Ben?
Demonstrating their lack of Unicode support?
-
@pie_flavor If I had one Euro every time my name gets written as
Rémi, I would have a lot of€...
-
@topspin They're calling it Tinder U. Basically you verify by your university email that you go to that university, and then it displays the university's logo as a badge.
-
@pie_flavor said in Tinder is shit:
by your university email that you go to that university, and then it displays the university's logo as a badge.
Well, I still have my university email despite not being a student there for nearly three years now, so this is clearly a sensible way of verification.
-
@Douglasac Oh, dude, you can get all JetBrains products for free. There's a lot more where that came from. That's possibly the least WTF part of this.
-
@pie_flavor Please go on.
-
@pie_flavor said in Tinder is shit:
There's a lot more where that came from.
On that note, my mobile phone provider offered a 10% student discount and a special priced plan two years back, so I used my uni email address to get it with a Galaxy S7 (because I am cheap). I did it all online so there was no interaction with a person beyond having to show the delivery driver some ID and drawing a scribble that barely resembles my signature on his crappy Symbol WinCE machine.
Last year, I took my phone into a store and did the swap over with them. I am not sure if it was because the guy was a trainee and had to keep asking for help or if he legitimately didn't notice it or if they just can't remove it, but I still have the student discount, which made the sting of a better plan coming out for the phone I switched to not three days later a little less painful.
-
@marczellm said in Tinder is shit:
@pie_flavor Please go on.
60% off Adobe Creative Cloud, six months free Amazon Prime with 50% off signup at the end, 10% off AT&T/Sprint, 50% off Spotify, Office 365 for free, stuff like that. A .edu email address is pretty much the only way student status is verified online, so if you've got one of those, you can get any online student discount you see.
-
@Benjamin-Hall said in Tinder is shit:
@timebandit said in Tinder is shit:
@benjamin-hall said in Tinder is shit:
I like to live life on the wild side.
Just get married then
Well, I want to, but....women and I are a complicated subject. Ok, not so complicated. I suck at starting relationships (or even detecting that such would be desirable).
Every person I've ever been significantly attracted to had at least one of the following traits:
- Married/in a long-term relationship
- Completely out of my league.
- Unavailable/not compatible for other reasons (religious, life-style, orientation, etc).
Ohohohoh, that's my exact same problem. I'm seemingly incapable of satisfying sentimental relationships (even though I've had a few long-term ones), because I get bored by people my same kind, and the other kinds of people end up being incompatible, and I end up "compromising" in a way that doesn't feel like a healthy compromise. It's not as if I "misbehave" or even complain/nitpick/criticise (frankly it's usually the other way round), but I have very little patience and probably too high expectations (not of my partners, but of sentimental relationships in general), and I end up disappointed and I stop giving a fuck.
For a while, I jumped from one fuckfriendship to another (managing to suck a few of my partners into infatuation/love probably because of my evasiveness), I have fallen in love and felt "complete" only once in my life and it was with a girl much younger than me that didn't want a serious relationship (and now she doesn't even say hello any more, which is kind of sad), since then everything seems pointless really.
-
@admiral_p: if we start scrutinizing relationships like we do for software, we won't ever run out of WTF material!
-
@admiral_p I've never even gotten that close. I've been on 2 second dates, neither of which were with people I was interested in--they were out of politeness.
I've never kissed anyone romantically, nor have I ever even held hands or had my arms around someone I was attracted to. For many years I didn't even really have any friends, merely a bunch of acquaintances. I've been alone my entire life.
The worst part is that now that I've gotten over some of my earlier issues (that were in part because of emotional abuse as a kid), I lack the skills and social network needed to actually meet people that might become partners. Everyone I know at church is married and/or old. Same at work.
-
@Benjamin-Hall I'm really not the right person to give advice, but if work is out (it usually is) maybe try some hobbies to meet people. Church can't be the only thing you do in your spare time.
-
@Benjamin-Hall: I'd upvote your post, but this would be ambiguous.
-
@topspin that's what's given me the few friends I have now. Bad part is that many social hobbies are hard to break into unless you already have someone who does them--there are few public groups. Have to have friends to make friends.
-
@Benjamin-Hall said in Tinder is shit:
Have to have friends to make friends.
Not true at all. You make friends by talking to the same people repeatedly.
If you need extra help, start a hobby which encourages talking (acting, for example) or find a group which already has the habit of extra-curricular social activities (while I'm not a member, my local dive club goes to the pub after every training session, and has a group trip to the sea or lake district most weekends).
Also, don't inject religion into everything.
-
@coldandtired Indeed. When I joined my Capoeira group in university I didn't know anyone save for a friend. A few weeks later I had found several new friends.
It's a bit tricky sometimes but just ask - if you find a small to medium group heading somewhere after the group activity simply ask them if you can join up. They'll rarely say no and you'll notice quickly if you fit in or not. Even better when your new group has some social creatures who go: "Hey, we're going somewhere, wanna come with us?"
-
@Rhywden said in Tinder is shit:
@coldandtired Indeed. When I joined my Capoeira group in university I didn't know anyone save for a friend. A few weeks later I had found several new friends.
It's a bit tricky sometimes but just ask - if you find a small to medium group heading somewhere after the group activity simply ask them if you can join up. They'll rarely say no and you'll notice quickly if you fit in or not.
But to be fair, it's a bit harder to make friendships when you're past your twenties.
And it gets harder. You lose the drive to talk about shit, many things stop being interesting (been there, done that). Dating is frankly easier, because you have the sexual tension to keep you motivated. I'm dismissive of dating apps for simple pride reasons, I suppose (and also because, in my culture, it's seen as a bit as the last resource for really desperate people, so all you find is desperate people, and I'm not desperate, I'm uninterested at the moment), but he could try using one. Not all of them are like Tinder, for example OKCupid is supposed to be for relationships and not hook-ups. The good thing about dating is that, if you approach it with a positive, non-self-defeatist approach, and accepting that a big part of it is a big "game" (as appalling as that is), if things don't evolve you get to eventually recognise patterns, and basically you learn from your failures. (That's for the "I'm extremely awkward in these situations" kind of stuff).
-
@coldandtired said in Tinder is shit:
Also, don't inject religion into everything.
ITYM "don't inject religion into anything."
Unless the social context is something related to / operated by your church (in which case the religion aspect is (a) automatic and (b) already there so you can't inject it), leave any and all questions of religion at the door.
-
@Steve_The_Cynic said in Tinder is shit:
ITYM "don't inject religion into anything."
Baby steps. There's already far too much religion on what is supposed to be a tech forum.
-
@coldandtired said in Tinder is shit:
@Steve_The_Cynic said in Tinder is shit:
ITYM "don't inject religion into anything."
Baby steps. There's already far too much religion on what is supposed to be a tech forum.
Fair point, although I meant "in the context of dating".
-
@Rhywden said in Tinder is shit:
It's a bit tricky sometimes but just ask - if you find a small to medium group heading somewhere after the group activity simply ask them if you can join up. They'll rarely say no and you'll notice quickly if you fit in or not. Even better when your new group has some social creatures who go: "Hey, we're going somewhere, wanna come with us?"
That's a bit harder though. Personally, I prefer sticking around and waiting to get asked, I absolutely hate having to ask to invite myself. Feels like imposing myself onto others.
What does work better is asking something like "oh, you're going to the pub after xxx?" you'll put them right on it so they can ask "yeah, want to join?" if they're interested, but don't feel obligated if they don't.
Granted, the more direct and open your approach the higher your success rate will be, but not everyone is comfortable being like this.
-
@Steve_The_Cynic I know. I meant that if everyone here can see who the fundamentalists are in a topic about Java or UX, it's going to be hard to keep that out of a real-life conversation.
-
@topspin @Rhywden That tactic assumes that you're around groups of people that go and do things after whatever activity you're already participating in. Which assumes being part of a group activity to begin with. Which requires a friend group/social hobby group to already exist. Which causes that to fail for me. The one social group I do have has to rigorously schedule our activities and is (by its nature) closed to new people, being a stable D&D group. And winning that group took me a very long time and lots of work.
This is one reason why I don't generally talk about my social issues--people who are already good at making friends think that if it's easy for them, it should be easy for others. Which is seriously presumptuous. It's like a bird telling a worm "flying's easy. Just spread your wings..."
-
@Benjamin-Hall I'm not saying that all groups are like the Capoeira group I mentioned. It takes a bit of "shopping around".
-
@Rhywden presumes existence of a "market" (to continue the analogy). If such exists, I've been horrible at finding it/them.
-
@Benjamin-Hall In Germany, we usually have a plethora of sports clubs in every city - those usually offer everything from martial arts over fitness to group sports for comparatively little money. Don't you have those in the US?
-
@Rhywden said in Tinder is shit:
@Benjamin-Hall In Germany, we usually have a plethora of sports clubs in every city - those usually offer everything from martial arts over fitness to group sports for comparatively little money. Don't you have those in the US?
Agreed. When I started training at a local dojo about a year and a half ago, I didn't know anyone there. Now I'm friends with pretty much all of them.
-
@Rhywden I haven't found any near enough to me to be useful. I'll admit, sports are something that I don't normally want to do (being very unathletic).
-
@Benjamin-Hall said in Tinder is shit:
@Rhywden I haven't found any near enough to me to be useful. I'll admit, sports are something that I don't normally want to do (being very unathletic).
Not to be the kind of person that suggests easy solutions, but have you considered moving away? It doesn't always make sense, because if you have personal issues you're not going to leave them back, but it can provide the right motivation to take chances because you have to start anew. Maybe in a place where you already have some connections so you're not completely on your own.
-
@Benjamin-Hall I'm also not the world's biggest athlete. And several others who started Capoeira with me were even worse - within Capoeira everyone gets a name after their first Batizado (which would amount to the first belt in Karate). With women, these are usually "cute" names like Princessa, Ballerina or Gaterinha (kitten). With men, it's either a physical attribution or something else that's prominent (usually in a funny way) - we had one Hercules (he really looked the part) but we also had Kanguru (he was always hopping about), Macarao ("noodle"), Ventilador (he was always waving his outstretched arms about). Me, I was Santo (The Saint).
Anyways, long story short, we also had Kamikaze. Because, you know, one of the basic moves of Capoeira is the cartwheel. With Kamikaze, you always knew where he was when we were doing cartwheels. Because he usually crashed quite spectacularly when trying to do them - that's where the name came from.
But he kept at it and now he's one of the senior trainers.
-
@admiral_p I just bought a house, and I love my job. And it's been the same no matter where I've lived. Each time I've moved I've told myself that it's a fresh start... And each time nothing has changed, because the problem isn't the place, or the other people. It's me.
-
@Benjamin-Hall said in Tinder is shit:
the problem isn't the place, or the other people. It's me
Right in the feels, dammit...
Same for me. Tears me apart, slowly, but it seems there's no helping when the prison is part of one's own self.
-
@topspin said in Tinder is shit:
It's a bit tricky sometimes but just ask - if you find a small to medium group heading somewhere after the group activity simply ask them if you can join up. They'll rarely say no and you'll notice quickly if you fit in or not. Even better when your new group has some social creatures who go: "Hey, we're going somewhere, wanna come with us?"
That's a bit harder though. Personally, I prefer sticking around and waiting to get asked, I absolutely hate having to ask to invite myself. Feels like imposing myself onto others.
Usually I feel the same but I have to say exactly that one time I told myself, whatever, I'll invite myself, these guys look fun and also like they could tell me to fuck off if they don't like me joining, I made some good friends. Haven't seen them in quite a while as I moved away but for several years we used to hang out a lot and I always drop by when I'm in the area.
-
-
@admiral_p said in Tinder is shit:
Dating is frankly easier, because you have the sexual tension to keep you motivated
Really? Huh....
-
-
@Tsaukpaetra said in Tinder is shit:
@admiral_p said in Tinder is shit:
Dating is frankly easier, because you have the sexual tension to keep you motivated
Really? Huh....
Well, it sort of is for me. I'm not Lemmy Kilminster by any means, but I do manage to get meself some minge. My biggest problem is that I'm choosy.
-
@Benjamin-Hall said in Tinder is shit:
each time nothing has changed, because the problem isn't the place, or the other people. It's me.
-
@admiral_p said in Tinder is shit:
My biggest problem is that I'm choosy.
If any of your rejects are in AZ, referrals accepted. :P
-
@Benjamin-Hall said in Tinder is shit:
... And each time nothing has changed, because the problem isn't the place, or the other people. It's me.
If it's any consolation, I'm right down there with you. My "favorite" thing is when folks tell me to "just be yourself", which is roughly equivalent to telling me to go home, play video games, and never try to meet people.
-
@Parody yeah. Or the "just go out more and meet people" love, especially after telling them that that's exactly what I have a hard time doing.
Like men and women, people who find interpersonal relationships intuitive and easy and those who struggle often find it hard to communicate effectively. Both are flabbergasted that what's so obvious to them isn't obvious or even possible for the other person.
-
@Benjamin-Hall said in Tinder is shit:
@Parody yeah. Or the "just go out more and meet people" love, especially after telling them that that's exactly what I have a hard time doing.
Like men and women, people who find interpersonal relationships intuitive and easy and those who struggle often find it hard to communicate effectively. Both are flabbergasted that what's so obvious to them isn't obvious or even possible for the other person.
Which is why I suggested online dating. Which I assume you tried, at least once. Still, you don't seem to have a very hard time communicating in written form, and the good thing is, women on online dating (dating, not hookups) services may be as socially awkward as you are (and you can select them for this), or the fact that you are (heehee! Sorry.) an adult virgin may engender curiosity in many people who may have had their fair share of experiences with people of the world and are fascinated by something which is, for today's standards, "pure". (That's what attracted me, in a certain way, to a previous partner of mine). The odds that you might find that other special awkward socially-inept one on there are at least higher than trying to engage people in real life with no context, hiding your cards because that's how the game is played, etc.
Single women get married to trees in ceremony to save them
