The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨
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@JBert said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
@jinpa What's it from? I find it odd that it skips numbers every so often.
"Channel 1" was used to indicate UHF, which had a separate dial, so this would be normal that it would be represented by a dot (or by "UHF"). Channel 13 probably was indicated by a dot on this particular model just for balance. I know that my locality did not have a channel 3; I don't know whether this was universal (in the U.S.) at the time.
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@jinpa Oh the memories...
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@jinpa said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
I know that my locality did not have a channel 3; I don't know whether this was universal (in the U.S.) at the time.
Channel 3 was always for the VCR for us.
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@jinpa Ah thanks. Both my father as well as my grandfather had switched to TVs with a small number of presets by the time I grew up.
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@Erufael said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
@jinpa said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
I know that my locality did not have a channel 3; I don't know whether this was universal (in the U.S.) at the time.
Channel 3 was always for the VCR for us.
And I think VCR makers used it for that because it wasn't used as a regular channel before that.
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@jinpa said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
And I think VCR makers used it for that because it wasn't used as a regular channel before that.
It varied by area. Channel 3 would be unused in an area that had stations on 2 and/or 4, to avoid interference. VCRs, games, etc. usually offered a choice between 3 and 4, so you could use the one that was unused over-the-air in your area. BTW, there was originally a channel 1, but it was prone to interference (I don't remember from what) and was reallocated to a different service (Amateur Radio) early in the history of TV broadcasting.
My guess would be that the pictured TV tuner was produced for a non-US country that didn't use channel 3 at all.
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@Erufael said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
Channel 3 was always for the
VCRNES for us.FTFM, although the knob was missing on mine
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@Tsaukpaetra There is an even better pun in French, where "having a hair in the hand" means "being lazy" (probably from the idea that working would rub and prevent the growth of any potential hair on the palm... it's always sounded a bit weird to me...).
See for example:
Translation of the last pun:
"It's well built, at least? ... because... when it comes to polishing... you usually have un poil dans la main..."
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@Scarlet_Manuka said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
@cabrito What makes it a bad joke is that they have a no-resistance path in parallel.
<necro>
At least they should have colored the resistor yellow-black-yellow.
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@remi said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
@Tsaukpaetra There is an even better pun in French, where "having a hair in the hand" means "being lazy" (probably from the idea that working would rub and prevent the growth of any potential hair on the palm... it's always sounded a bit weird to me...).
Or that masturbating a lot would cause it to grow?
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@LaoC Maybe, although that doesn't really make much more sense, since when does masturbating supposedly makes hair grow (it makes something grow, but not permanently, for the obvious ...)?
But anyway when I was a child and wondered about the origin of this, I'm not really surprised my parents didn't see fit to mention the masturbating explanation, even if they knew it.
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@remi In the U.S. this used to be a common faux-superstition (as far as I know, no one actually believed it) along with it causing blindness.
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"I wish I was making 100'000 $ a month, just like my dad."
"Your dad gets that much a month?"
"No, he also wishes that."
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What do presidential elections in Russia and USA have in common?
Russian people have no influence on the outcome of either one.
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5vtF6UlkFZs
"Sock pecker" Sounds like a mispronunciation of my name...
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@Tsaukpaetra said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
"Sock pecker" Sounds like a mispronunciation of my name...
Do you like sticking your pecker into socks? If so, you're either a member of a certain band or using the socks for an alternative purpose!
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A DEA Agent stopped at a ranch in Texas and talked to an old rancher. He told the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs." The rancher said, "okay, but don't go into that field over there...", as he pointed out the location. The DEA Agent verbally exploded and said, "look mister, I have the authority of the federal government with me!" Reaching into his rear back pocket, the arrogant officer removed his badge and proudly displayed it to the rancher. "See this badge?! This badge means I can go wherever I want... On any land! No questions asked, no answers given! Do you understand old man?!"
The rancher kindly nodded, apologized, and went about his chores. Moments later the rancher heard loud screams, he looked up and saw the DEA agent running for his life, being chased by the ranchers big Santa Gertrudis Bull...... With every step the bull was gaining ground on the officer, and it was likely that he'd sure enough get gored before he reached safety. The officer was clearly terrified. The old rancher threw down his tools, ran as fast as he could to the fence, and yelled at the top of his lungs......
"YOUR BADGE! SHOW HIM YOUR BADGE!"
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A pirate goes to see the doctor...
Pirate: "There be moles on my back, arrrrrrrr!"
Doctor: "It's OK, it looks like they're benign"
Pirate: "Check again, I think there be ten!"
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I was recently asked to describe myself in 3 words.
I replied "not very good with numbers"
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I went to this brilliant burger van over the weekend. It was so good, it had 4 Michelin tyres.
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I bought a chocolate egg which was an obvious imitation of those Kinder eggs.
When I opened it there was nothing inside it. I wasn't surprised.
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sniff "They grow up so fast!..."
/me trimming my fingernails
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Random thought: I think I've figured why Tic-Tacs have one side narrower than the other.
It's so they can be consumed by people with bad breadth.
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@DoctorJones said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
A pirate goes to see the doctor...
Pirate: "There be moles on my back, arrrrrrrr!"
Doctor: "It's OK, it looks like they're benign"
Pirate: "Check again, I think there be ten!"
For some reason I was stuck on miles the furry animal and was disappointed when there wasn't some animal related pun
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@Jaloopa said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
@DoctorJones said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
A pirate goes to see the doctor...
Pirate: "There be moles on my back, arrrrrrrr!"
Doctor: "It's OK, it looks like they're benign"
Pirate: "Check again, I think there be ten!"
For some reason I was stuck on moles the furry animal and was disappointed when there wasn't some animal related pun
While I was wondering why the number of moles would be 9 or 10 instead of the more obvious 6.023×1023.
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@da-Doctah NNNEEEEEEERRRRRD!!!!
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@da-Doctah said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
@Jaloopa said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
@DoctorJones said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
A pirate goes to see the doctor...
Pirate: "There be moles on my back, arrrrrrrr!"
Doctor: "It's OK, it looks like they're benign"
Pirate: "Check again, I think there be ten!"
For some reason I was stuck on moles the furry animal and was disappointed when there wasn't some animal related pun
While I was wondering why the number of moles would be 9 or 10 instead of the more obvious 6.023×1023.
What would your back look like if it contained a mole of moles?
E_CANNOT_UNSEE
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@PleegWat said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
@da-Doctah said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
@Jaloopa said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
@DoctorJones said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
A pirate goes to see the doctor...
Pirate: "There be moles on my back, arrrrrrrr!"
Doctor: "It's OK, it looks like they're benign"
Pirate: "Check again, I think there be ten!"
For some reason I was stuck on moles the furry animal and was disappointed when there wasn't some animal related pun
While I was wondering why the number of moles would be 9 or 10 instead of the more obvious 6.023×1023.
What would your back look like if it contained a mole of moles?
If 10100 is a googol and 10googol is a googolplex, then a mole of moles would naturally be a moleplex.
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@da-Doctah said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
@Jaloopa said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
@DoctorJones said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
A pirate goes to see the doctor...
Pirate: "There be moles on my back, arrrrrrrr!"
Doctor: "It's OK, it looks like they're benign"
Pirate: "Check again, I think there be ten!"
For some reason I was stuck on moles the furry animal and was disappointed when there wasn't some animal related pun
While I was wondering why the number of moles would be 9 or 10 instead of the more obvious 6.023×1023.
This is the bad jokes topic. The nerdy jokes thread is .
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Race isn't real, racism is just selection bias. It's all just a pigment of your imagination.
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A woman driver switching on her left turn signal before the intersection doesn't necessarily mean she'll turn right.
She might go straight through.
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Seen on Facebook (my uncle posts almost nothing but kilts and bad jokes):
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@obeselymorbid said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
A woman driver switching on her left turn signal before the intersection doesn't necessarily mean she'll turn right.
She might go straight through.
Or maybe she just thinks the turn signal stalk is a place to hang her purse....
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Dear algebra, please stop asking us to find your x. She's never coming back, and don't ask y.
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I asked the librarian if the library had any books about paranoia.
She whispered, "They're behind you..."
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I went to the library & asked if they had a book about tiny willies?
Librarian said "I don't think its in yet"
I said "Yes that's the one"
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Sean Connery was recently admitted to hospital after an accident involving his book collection falling onto him.
When interviewed, he said "I have only my shelf to blame".
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I saw Sean Connery outside the church once.
Must've been hired by a razor company, because he kept proclaiming how "Jesus shaves".
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@obeselymorbid said in The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨:
A woman driver switching on her left turn signal before the intersection doesn't necessarily mean she'll turn right.
She might go straight through.
Not exactly a joke, but reminds me of my friend with Tourette's Syndrome who used to have a tic where he would switch his turn signal on and off.
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Courtesy of my uncle again--
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@Benjamin-Hall That took me a minute to figure out. To me, his head looks like a warped image of the Moon.