The Official Status Thread
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@Jaloopa said in The Official Status Thread:
Speaking of Skype,
Skype for Business
Different things. :(
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@Jaloopa said in The Official Status Thread:
So zipping the files up has done nothing apart from giving me the extra step of unzipping before I can read them
Actually, it probably slightly increased the file size, too.
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@cartman82 Skype used to be good.
Then Microsoft bought it.
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@TimeBandit said in The Official Status Thread:
Skype used to be good.
Then Microsoft bought it.You got memory problems?
Before Microsoft bought it, Skype had multiple-day outages regularly. Since Microsoft bought it, the servers have been rock-solid, because Microsoft took some of the peer-to-peer infrastructure in-house, something that Skype never did in YEARS and YEARS of running the project.
The client is shitty, yes. I assume that's because they assigned the Windows Live leftovers to it, and that group is full of idiots.
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@blakeyrat said in The Official Status Thread:
You got memory problems?
No, I remember the client used to be good.
Before Microsoft bought it, Skype had multiple-day outages regularly. Since Microsoft bought it, the servers have been rock-solid, because Microsoft took some of the peer-to-peer infrastructure in-house, something that Skype never did in YEARS and YEARS of running the project.
Yes, and it's rock solid because those super-nodes are NOT running on windows servers.
The client is shitty, yes.
That, we agree on.
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@TimeBandit OMG LUNIXES!! oh wait I don't give a shit.
So you think the client having a few bugs is a bigger problem than the servers regularly going down for days at a time.
Ok, I'm calibrating my mental database for your particular brand of moron and... there. Next time we speak I should just automatically assume you're a moron without requiring this back and forth first.
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@blakeyrat said in The Official Status Thread:
Ok, I'm calibrating my mental database for your particular brand of moron
That would be a huge improvement over your usual moron level.
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Finally forced to negotiate the Tech Support system for my laptop's inability to open Firefox:
- open request
- half an hour later, receive email saying request status has been changed to 'resolved'
- close note from Support person says only "please contact [tech support] on [phone number]"
- check if problem resolved: no change
- ring number
- very helpful guy answers, takes my request number, and seems confused when I explain that I was just told to call this number
- helpful guy says never mind, sets status back to 'in progress' and assigns to himself
- applies fix (which fails)
- while we're trying this fix, helpful guy tells me that the person who had it originally has assigned it back to himself and closed it again
(Ultimate result: the cavalry have been sent for. When I hear from them it'll probably be to arrange to take my laptop away, no idea how long for.)
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STATUS: Attending monthly Communist Party meeting
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@blakeyrat said in The Official Status Thread:
So you think the client having a few bugs is a bigger problem than the servers regularly going down for days at a time.
Which would you prefer?
- Forum goes down
- Forum sets your house on fire
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@ben_lubar Am I in the house at the time?
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@blakeyrat yes
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@ben_lubar Then house fire, definitely.
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@CarrieVS said in The Official Status Thread:
he person who had it originally has assigned it back to himself and closed it again
Find this person. Ask them to explain themselves.
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@blakeyrat said in The Official Status Thread:
@ben_lubar Then house fire, definitely.
And then you can use Skype to call for help.
Or livestream your house burning down.
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@Lorne-Kates said in The Official Status Thread:
And then you can use Skype to call for help.
Or livestream your house burning down.
But only after Windows 10 finished rebooting to apply updates.
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Status: My dad got remarried on Friday. I found out through Facebook on Monday.
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@abarker spur of the moment thing, or intentional exclusion?
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@accalia I don't know. My guess is a combination of both. He still hasn't directly told me. I found out by Facebook stalking him.
Well, that's not entirely true. I found out after my niece Facebook stalked him and told her mom (my sister) who then texted me, and then I Facebook stalked him.
To make it even more interesting, it appears his new wife has not yet finalized her divorce from her previous husband.
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@abarker said in The Official Status Thread:
He still hasn't directly told me. I found out by Facebook stalking him.
uhh......
@abarker said in The Official Status Thread:
I found out after my niece Facebook stalked him and told her mom (my sister) who then texted me
...... whaaaaaaaa
@abarker said in The Official Status Thread:
his new wife has not yet finalized her divorce from her previous husband.
....... i think i can say without fear of contridiction that your family situation is........ unique..... yeah i can work with that.... ahem Your family situation is unique among everyone that i know.
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@AyGeePlus said in The Official Status Thread:
@CarrieVS said in The Official Status Thread:
he person who had it originally has assigned it back to himself and closed it again
Find this person. Ask them to explain themselves.
Here, take this, it will help you "ask" them in proper tone:
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@accalia said in The Official Status Thread:
i think i can say without fear of contridiction that your family situation is........ unique
You don't know the half of it.
And based on what little I've said in the past few posts, it probably wouldn't surprise you to know that my dad is the source of about 99% of it.
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@abarker said in The Official Status Thread:
my dad is the source of about 99% of it.
i'd believe it......
...... sorry.....
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Status: Update 204 of 222.
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@abarker said in The Official Status Thread:
@accalia said in The Official Status Thread:
i think i can say without fear of contridiction that your family situation is........ unique
You don't know the half of it.
And based on what little I've said in the past few posts, it probably wouldn't surprise you to know that my dad is the source of about 99% of it.
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@abarker said in The Official Status Thread:
To make it even more interesting, it appears his new wife has not yet finalized her divorce from her previous husband.
.... is her ex husband your father?
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@blakeyrat said in The Official Status Thread:
Depends on how complicated the search is?
Is it just a simple text search, or a complicated RegEx, or something that requires 57 joins, or...? Is the average record size 4k or 30 gigabytes?
It strikes me as a bit long, but without knowing what you're searching for it's impossible to answer.From memory, there are about six text fields being searched, varchar, and about five other fields (including and ID) that are not text. Expected average record size is ~ 600 bytes, but I don't have a real copy so....
This is the (apparently) schema:
CREATE TABLE `cm_attendees` ( `id` int(11) NOT NULL AUTO_INCREMENT, `first_name` varchar(255) NOT NULL, `last_name` varchar(255) NOT NULL, `fandom_name` varchar(255) DEFAULT NULL, `name_on_badge` enum('FandomReal','RealFandom','FandomOnly','RealOnly') NOT NULL, `date_of_birth` date NOT NULL, `badge_id` int(11) NOT NULL, `do_not_spam` tinyint(1) NOT NULL, `email_address` varchar(255) NOT NULL, `phone_number` varchar(255) DEFAULT NULL, `address_1` varchar(255) DEFAULT NULL, `address_2` varchar(255) DEFAULT NULL, `city` varchar(255) DEFAULT NULL, `state` varchar(255) DEFAULT NULL, `zip_code` varchar(255) DEFAULT NULL, `country` varchar(255) DEFAULT NULL, `ice_name` varchar(255) DEFAULT NULL, `ice_relationship` varchar(255) DEFAULT NULL, `ice_email_address` varchar(255) DEFAULT NULL, `ice_phone_number` varchar(255) DEFAULT NULL, `payment_status` enum('Incomplete','Cancelled','Completed','Refunded','Pulled') NOT NULL, `payment_type` varchar(255) DEFAULT NULL, `payment_txn_id` varchar(255) DEFAULT NULL, `payment_original_price` decimal(7,2) DEFAULT NULL, `payment_promo_code` varchar(255) DEFAULT NULL, `payment_final_price` decimal(7,2) DEFAULT NULL, `payment_total_price` decimal(7,2) DEFAULT NULL, `payment_date` datetime DEFAULT NULL, `payment_details` text, `payment_lookup_key` varchar(255) DEFAULT NULL, `print_count` int(11) DEFAULT NULL, `print_time` datetime DEFAULT NULL, `checkin_count` int(11) DEFAULT NULL, `checkin_time` datetime DEFAULT NULL, `date_created` datetime NOT NULL, `date_modified` datetime NOT NULL, PRIMARY KEY (`id`) ) ENGINE=InnoDB DEFAULT CHARSET=latin1;
No joins at that level, but later on there is one to join a many-to-one relationship on a tiny lookup table.
It looks (something) like this on the front end:
Of course, according to said person, they're searching in PHP instead of the DB itself, so...
@Jaloopa said in The Official Status Thread:
remote desktop style application
Wait, so it's not actually remote desktop? I would have suggested seeing if you could enable RemoteApp mode, which would put a normal icon in the taskbar (and notification area) like a normal app...
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@Tsaukpaetra said in The Official Status Thread:
Of course, according to said person, they're searching in PHP instead of the DB itself, so...
Oh well that kind of invalidates the whole issue doesn't it?
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@blakeyrat said in The Official Status Thread:
Oh well that kind of invalidates the whole issue doesn't it?
Yep. Especially after I had provided code to have the DB do the search instead of the PHP interpreter.
Then again, my PR probably didn't get merged upward to the main repo or something...
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@Tsaukpaetra It's also MySQL using InnoDB which I'm not even sure has a full-text search feature/engine. Maybe it does, I dunno. So even if the PHP thing were fixed, I'm not really qualified to answer how long searching those 5 columns should take for InnoDB.
(EDIT: apparently it does, according to Percona. Hey, weren't those the superhero guys?)
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Status: Finally home, had dinner, I have my coffee and I'm browsing TDWTF, everything is right with the wo...
Oh no wait, I ran out of coffee, I only have this instant cappuccino bullshit mix!
I'd kill something but I lack the required caffeine for that.
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@Lorne-Kates said in The Official Status Thread:
@abarker said in The Official Status Thread:
To make it even more interesting, it appears his new wife has not yet finalized her divorce from her previous husband.
.... is her ex husband your father?
No.
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@abarker said in The Official Status Thread:
@Lorne-Kates said in The Official Status Thread:
@abarker said in The Official Status Thread:
To make it even more interesting, it appears his new wife has not yet finalized her divorce from her previous husband.
.... is her ex husband your father?
No.
Oh well, there's always next marriage.
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@Onyx said in The Official Status Thread:
I only have this instant cappuccino bullshit mix!
Oh oh oh is it one of those ones whose ingredients include "silicate"?
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@Lorne-Kates Possibly. I'm to tired to give a fuck though.
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@El_Heffe said in The Official Status Thread:
STATUS: Driving in Idaho
Is that the middle-of-nowhere version of "Get off my lawn!"?
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Status: laughing at this bug:
file incorrectly labeled as Erlang JAM file (OO does not print on Tuesdays)
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Status: Just argued with a Vegan about milk. It's fascinating how defensive they get once you uncover their pseudo-scientific bullshit.
For the record: I don't drink milk myself due to Lactase not properly working for me anymore.
First he spouted some idiocy about milk containing "pus cells" - when asked what that was supposed to be, the answer was: "Maybe staphylococcus?" When I pointed out that this would mean that we humans are covered in pus, he corrected himself that he meant "somatic cells".
Moving on, he then claimed that milk was causing ostheoporosis due to raising the pH-level! Yes, raising. When I asked him how exactly this was to come about he claimed that milk causes acidosis.
Y'know, the life-threatening condition where the blood pH falls below 7.35.
I haven't yet received an answer as to why, if that was indeed the case, drinking a glass of apple juice wouldn't kill you on the spot.
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Paid off car and credits cards and have a bit of money to save this week ... feel really happy to be almost completely debt free :D
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@Magus said in The Official Status Thread:
you'd need to have one of each of three winds and the green dragon in the dead wall, and three of every wind in your hand, and draw the fourth and last wind on your turn, which makes you chain draw the last four and win with a
...MORNINGTON CRESCENT!
(seriously, how is that not gibberish.)
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@Rhywden If you think this is crazy.
There is inter-sectional vegan-ism.
It basically crosses vegan-ism with feminism ... so a cow is an oppressed and objectified female and therefore it is sexist to milk a cow.
What vegans never mention is that most of everything we eat has been bred into the form we see it now. Cattle for example has a wild (now Extinct) ancestor was an Auroch.
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@Maciejasjmj Jargon is fun!
Turns out that's some kind of crazy multiple yakuman too!
@Maciejasjmj said in The Official Status Thread:
...MORNINGTON CRESCENT!
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@Rhywden said in The Official Status Thread:
"Maybe staphylococcus?" When I pointed out that this would mean that we humans are covered in pus
I mean, humans are covered in staphylococcus. Humans are covered in everything. Filthy beasts.
Talking to really militant vegans with a terminal fact deficiency about honey is actually super fun.
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@AyGeePlus Surely at some point it becomes similar to Jainism?
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@lucas1 said in The Official Status Thread:
Paid off car and credits cards and have a bit of money to save this week ... feel really happy to be almost completely debt free :D
If you're about to have a windfall of free cash, might I suggest...
https://www.indiegogo.com/command_center/fuck-you-give-me-money-2
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@abarker said in The Official Status Thread:
My dad got remarried on Friday. I found out through Facebook on Monday.
Speaking of this, my German colleague is getting married in a few weeks.
She has to get married in Denmark because apparently most of Europe requires proof that she is unmarried while at the same time not providing said proof. So Poland won't let her marry here, and Germany says that as she's been out of the country for a while they won't provide the document.
Las Vegas is the other possibility.
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@Lorne-Kates The cash was paid via writing lots of fucking boring business code in Sitecore. God bless large proprietary CMS systems that nobody except for a few are trained in so I can demand extortionate rates.
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@Lorne-Kates more like https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/fuck-you-give-me-money-2#/
And do they know how to count ?
- $20 pack : 1 claimed
- $1 pack : 2 claimed
Total raised : $24
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@TimeBandit said in The Official Status Thread:
do they know how to count ?
You don't have to claim the perk. Two people haven't.
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@loopback0 I see, wise choice : don't fuck me, I give you money anyway.