The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨
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OK, I must be going even crazier than usual, for some reason I read the title of this thread as "The bad brakes topic". I dunno, it's not like this thread hasn't been going on for a long time and I never made that mistake until now.
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Based on this and your misreading in another topic, I strongly recommend that you not do anything that requires reading comprehension today.
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My wife says I never listen. Or something like that
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The copy I had was simply called Chernobyl. In researching it, it looks like it might have had different names as well.
BTW I also had a promo disk with this demo on it:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=plMkt8z6scE
Which is like an educational video on how nuclear power works. Kind of a lazy one, all the graphics are just drawn with characters.
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My mate always tries to go the extra mile at work.
He's a taxi driver.
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I went to a small zoo yesterday.
There was only one single dog in the entire zoo.It was a shitzu.
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My mate says you never ask a woman her age.
That's why his bar got shut down.
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My mate says you never ask a woman her age.
That's why his bar got shut down.
mate
Legal drinking age in England? Ha!
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Legal drinking age in England
5 as far as I know*
In the bar it's probably 18. Every time I visited England I was way over 18 anyway.* some conditions apply
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Maybe it's an Australian joke.
When I was down under, literally everyone I met called me mate.
In England it was a bit less often.
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Legal drinking age in England
5 as far as I know*In the bar it's probably 18.
Legal is five. At 18, drinking becomes mandatory.
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The invisible man and the invisible woman got married. Their kids are nothing to look at.
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Two priests and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says "Is this some sort of joke?"
http://i.imgur.com/0LhvO1D.gif
A guy walks into a bar carrying jumper cables. The bartender says "You better no try to start something."
http://i.imgur.com/0LhvO1D.gif
A dyslexic guy walks into a bra.
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A dyslexic pimp walks into a warehouse.
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My mate says you never ask a woman her age.
That's why his bar got shut down.
That's also why his dating site got shut down.
And why he has to introduce himself to all his neighbors.
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Gandhi, as you know, often went on several hunger strikes. This left his body somewhat feeble, and he refused to eat animal protein, or anything not in accordance with his beliefs, leaving him with surprisingly bad breath.
Gandhi was also known to live a humble lifestyle, often foregoing shoes and accumulating many foot problems as well.
Essentially, Gandhi was a super-calloused-fragile-mystic-hexed-with-halitosis.
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That sounds quite precocious
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what, like operating a reading-powered forklift?
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Something in one of the other threads reminded me of a strip from Wizard of Id (Brand Parker and Johnny Hart).
The wizard was walking with his wife, Blanch, who was, well, a bit of a battle-axe, when they were confronted by a robber. "Your money or your wife!" the robber yells.
In the next panel, he's crushed under Blanch, who was clearly dumped on him by the wizard; who is fleeing into the far distance. The robber calls after him, "Come back here, you wiwy wivered wouse!"
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Something in one of the other threads reminded me of a strip from Wizard of Id
Something in one of the other threads reminded me of a Andy Capp strip where he drinks, and then afterwards beats his wife.
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Something about your comment reminds me of that one Garfield, where he eats too much and then there's a wisecracking mouse.
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Something about your comment reminds me of that one Garfield, where he eats too much and then there's a wisecracking mouse.
I hope it wasn't Monday's strip. Because I don't like Mondays. Just like Cathy.
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I saw someone having sex with a book. But I couldn't see the title, so I had to ask him "What the literal fuck?!?"
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Okay, okay, @blakeyrat , @Lorne_Kates I'll never quote a comic strip in here again.
Sheeeeeeeeeshhhh!
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You remind me of that time Beetle Bailey got in trouble and had to peel potatoes for KP.
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So how long is a piece of thread?
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Depends if it's null terminated.
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Trying to decide if that's a whoosh or a legitimate answer... *strokes beard*
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Well, I tried.
Okay, it's as long as from run to stop.
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I was going for some infiscrolling/forum thread meta joke
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I was trying to think up a good line regarding fibers.
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Can't tell, it has split ends.
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Just about long enough to reach each end
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Why knot?
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Well they do say that reusability is the key to oOP
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Looks like a bug there- using an apostrophe as the first character. CBA to navigate over to meta.whatever on my mobile to report it
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What's the name of the quadriplegic on your front porch?
MatWhat's the name of the quadriplegic in your swimming pool?
BobWhat do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn't matter. He won't come when you call him.
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Not a joke per se, but: many years ago, a sockbiter from the UK told a story about a cousin of hers who had a visitor over from the US stay with him, who happened to be celebrating his 21st birthday.
Not surprisingly he went out that night and got roaring drunk. On the way home from the pub, he was hanging out the window of the car shouting, "I'm twenty-one and now it's legal!"
It wasn't until he sobered up the next day that anyone got to explain that the drinking age was 16.
But as it so happened, the legal age of consent for homosexual sex was 21 at the time...
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There has been a huge explosion at a French cheese factory.
There was nothing left but the Brie.
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You remind me of that time Beetle Bailey got in trouble and had to peel potatoes for KP.
No, it's more like the time someone insulted Chef's food and he sulked by sitting on top of the mess hall's roof.
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What do you call cheese that's not yours?
Nacho cheese!
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CBA to navigate over to meta.whatever on my mobile to report it
You'd get banned if you did, so good thing you didn't.