The bad jokes topic 🐴🍹👨
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"strategically sensitive area"
That's... what... how...
/me makes a note so I may use that phrase somewhere.
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@Mikael_Svahnberg said:
"strategically sensitive area"
Like Pearl Harbour.
Coming from you, there's only one way to interpret that.
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@Boner said:
And no Yellow Pages discussion would be complete without this gem:
And for once, an apparently genuine thing that happened.
Unfortunately, it's not apparent what year(s) the ad was actually published. We know it was <= 2005, that's all.
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Area codes in the UK were changed from "0" to "01" in 1995 so there's a 10 year window.
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Area codes in the UK were changed from "0" to "01" in 1995 so there's a 10 year window.
So it was after crudeness entered the public square.
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About a year or so age there was a billboard here with a picture of a woman in a cream dress, holding a martini glass with dark liquid. The martini glass was held directly in front of her "strategically sensitive area". You had to look twice to see what you were looking at. Will post a picture if I can find one (and if it exists)
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Unfortunately, it's not apparent what year(s) the ad was actually published. We know it was <= 2005, that's all.
The 2006-dated Snopes article says the ad was run about 10 years earlier.
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In deepest darkest Africa, there was a tribe that loved their chieftain. They loved him so much they decided to give him a gift.
After due consideration, they decided on an enormous stone throne.
The chief had no idea what to do with the throne, since it was uncomfortable. So he stowed it away in the attic of his grass hut. But it was so heavy that, one night, it fell through the ceiling and crushed him.
Moral: People who live in grass houses shouldn't stow thrones.
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"In a world oppressed by badly written directions...
..One child can be that hero"Driving, we reached the park our group was camping in, but didn't know exactly where the site was.
IJIJ:
"Spawn. Now is the time to use your powerful Scout skills!"
"For many moons, I have prepared you for a quest such as this."
"Look for the smoke from their fires..."
"Scan ahead for their tracks..."
"Do you see anything?"Spawn:
"Father, I see nothing ahead but the weathered and ancient tracks of a paving machine..."
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You have to be a yank over 50 to get that one.
Not true! I well remember the yellow pages, and I'm under 40!
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@tharpa said:
You have to be a yank over 50 to get that one.
Not true! I well remember the yellow pages, and I'm under 40!
But do you remember the jingle?
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I remember a jingle that It makes no sense for me to remember! The one for Pythagoras Switch!
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@abarker said:
@tharpa said:
You have to be a yank over 50 to get that one.
Not true! I well remember the yellow pages, and I'm under 40!
But do you remember the jingle?I do, but then I'm ... 29 and a few...
Old enough, anyway. But I'm just that joke is getting really dated. It's like jokes about telephone dials and wind-up phonographs or phonograph needles.
It's like this one:
Q: How do you get four elephants in a Beetle?
A: Two in front, two in back.(Waits for the horde to ask, "What's a 'Beetle'?")
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https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/e/e3/VW_Beetle_1.4_TSI_Sport_–_Frontansicht%2C_3.M%C3%A4rz_2013%2C_D%C3%BCsseldorf.jpg/800px-VW_Beetle_1.4_TSI_Sport%E2%80%93_Frontansicht%2C_3._M%C3%A4rz_2013%2C_D%C3%BCsseldorf.jpg
That one's still being built, actually ...
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I know it's being built. But I didn't think they call it a "Beetle" anymore. That was a pejorative back in the '60s? '50s? for the earlier Volkswagon that came to be adopted as a badge of honor. But I just realized; I forgot that they called the newer version a "Super Beetle" for a while. Guess it's not as obsolete a term as I thought.
Okay, what else is obsolete that has a joke about it?
Hmm....
I was looking for something along the lines of (not a joke) why it's called "cranking" when you start an engine.
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Nevermind the text above the pic, he's just wondering if he really should buy it or not.
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I'm not getting it.
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Thereby proving @coynethedup 's thesis?
3,5" disk. Comes in different flavours, but pertinent to this joke is HD (High Density) = 1.44MB.
Harley-Davidson (or HD for short). Comes with different flavours of fat bikers.
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Q: How do you get
fourfive elephants in a Beetle?
A: Two in front, two in backand one in the ashtray.HTH, HAND etc...
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https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/e/e3/VW_Beetle_1.4_TSI_Sport_–_Frontansicht%2C_3.M%C3%A4rz_2013%2C_D%C3%BCsseldorf.jpg/800px-VW_Beetle_1.4_TSI_Sport%E2%80%93_Frontansicht%2C_3._M%C3%A4rz_2013%2C_D%C3%BCsseldorf.jpg
That one's still being built, actually ...
That's not a Beetle. This is a Beetle.
http://www.garagedelange.nl/mod/Occ01/_Files/Volkwagen Kever 001.jpg
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The newest one is called "Beetle" in Germany.
It's the only one that ever had that name here.The old thing below was called "Käfer".
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Same here - the old one was "Kever". But I expect in English both were called Beetle, and the joke is likely to refer to the old one not the new.
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I got that a floppy was involved in the joke somehow, but I literally didn't see the motorcycle until you mentioned HD stands for Harley Davidson. I figured it was something about him squeezing into those pants.
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I knew of both these things. For some reason it just didn't click.
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he's just wondering if he really should buy it or not.
Much like @Yamikurowhyisntthepopupcomingup, I thought "it" was the pants or jacket.
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@Yamikurowhyisntthepopupcomingup
You got surprisingly far before giving up there :) Most surrender after four measly letters, but you, you persevered well after the halfway point. May all forum-goers learn from your fortitude.
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But I expect in English both were called Beetle
The 'Beetle' name is only officially used by VW for the 'New Beetle' (1997) onwards; the original was only called that by the public as a nickname (officially it was the 'Type 1')
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The 'Beetle' name is only officially used by VW for the 'New Beetle' (1997) onwards; the original was only called that by the public as a nickname (officially it was the 'Type 1')
I'm pretty sure the new(er) one we had was officially a "Super Beetle" ca 1972-model - it had semi-automatic-ish shifter and (I think) the dual carbs that caught fire.
We that and a '63 when my dad bought a new car - it was the '72 that got traded in.
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(Waits for the horde to ask, "What's a 'Beetle'?")
WTF? They've sold them continuously from like 1997-present.
In fact, since the Mexican factory didn't shut down until like 2004, that means there was approximately zero years during which there has not been a VW Beetle.
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I know it's being built. But I didn't think they call it a "Beetle" anymore.
Here's idea, spent 1/3rd of a second to check their website before you type something that makes you look like a drooling moron. Blakeyadvice.
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WTF? They've sold them continuously from like 1997-present.
I always got the impression from imported TV and stuff that they were known as Bugs in America, rather than Beetles
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I've heard both. Wiki says "bug" is informal/slang/a nickname:
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That's not a Beetle. This is a Beetle.
http://www.garagedelange.nl/mod/Occ01/_Files/Volkwagen Kever 001.jpg
Yes. Or a Bug, as everyone I ever met would call them informally. When they started making them again, they weren't the same thing. They were for people who were willing to pay extra for nostalgia. The originals were for people who couldn't afford real cars. And this was their counter-cultural appeal.
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Preposterous! Next you'll be claiming this isn't a duck!
The top Google result for 2CV? It's not the car…
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Preposterous! Next you'll be claiming this isn't a duck!
Sadly, doesn't appear to be anywhere that can be embedded here.
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Duel carbs - fries fighting spaghetti
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BIGGER IMAGE PLEASE! BIGGGGGGER! MORE GIGABYTES!!!<poo> IF YOU SHRINK OR CROP AN IMAGE YOU'VE LOST
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What do you know it as?
To be honest, I mixed up the terms "bug" and "beetle"; as a kid, my family usually called it the former. "Bug" is what is gone, I think, but bug doesn't really work in the joke.
WTF?
Here's idea, spent 1/3rd of a second