This sex toy tells the manufacturer every time you use it
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@groo and these days, if you even pretend you have any idea what you're transmitting, you either:
- Are Delusional
- Know and accept that damn near everything you do in every app is transmitted as telemetry.
- Keep Wireshark and Fiddler running on a second display at all times.
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@mrguyorama said in This sex toy tells the manufacturer every time you use it:
So do they even have a reason why they are doing this?
It doesn't surprise me that they collect information on which vibration settings get used, and what custom patterns are set; that seems like exactly the kind of information the app's product owner would want to have to make improvements. But the temperature, as a proxy for... what, frequency of use? Or are they trying to determine which hole it's in?
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@Weng said in This sex toy tells the manufacturer every time you use it:
The bigger bit goes in the hoo-ha, the other bit rests externally on the little man.
You're actually wrong. The larger piece is the clitoral stimulator, the smaller one targets the g-spot. It's surprisingly comfortable that way.
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@Yamikuronue maybe this thing has some type of heating or something?
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@groo It does not.
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@Yamikuronue said in This sex toy tells the manufacturer every time you use it:
But the temperature, as a proxy for... what, frequency of use? Or are they trying to determine which hole it's in?
Maybe if they're worried about the motor overheating or the vibrator being uncomfortably cold?
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@Yamikuronue now I'm just assuming the engineers want to locate users that match their preferences, maybe it is transmitting the phone numbers too
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@Weng said in This sex toy tells the manufacturer every time you use it:
Keep Wireshark and Fiddler running on a second display at all times.
...not all the time
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@Yamikuronue good call. I have yet to encounter this style in the wild.
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@Fox The silicone it's coated in is pretty nice, it ends up being room temperature when it's inserted. The motor thing might be legit, but why wouldn't you just have your engineers stress-test the product?
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@Yamikuronue said in This sex toy tells the manufacturer every time you use it:
The motor thing might be legit, but why wouldn't you just have your engineers stress-test the product?
I'm guessing their engineers probably don't have stress-testing products in their job description.
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@Fox I'm guessing they don't have the right equipment for such a test
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@Yamikuronue I tend to assume the data point would be most useful for building a self-learning "get me off I don't care how" feature that effectively fuzzes your vag looking for rising temperature and seeks to maximize it.
... I really want to work on that algorithm.
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Like, to the point I think I'm going to buy one of these, reverse it's Bluetooth protocol and make it happen.
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@Yamikuronue Depending on how flexible that u-shape is, they could probably make do with the equipment they have.
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@Weng I'd pay for the resulting app. Or I'm available for beta testing.
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Isn't the solution to this whole class of problems having a competent firewall which intercepts network connections and asks the user to allow/forbid them?
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@Yamikuronue Does Kickstarter have a rule about adult products?
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@Fox I believe so. But I don't need no damned Kickstarter to work out the software with someone else's hardware and a few people's wetware.
I do need a Bluetooth sniffer.
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@Weng Does wireshark do bluetooth? I know it does usb...
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@Weng said in This sex toy tells the manufacturer every time you use it:
I do need a Bluetooth sniffer.
Kickstarter!
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@PleegWat Probably. I've never had cause to sniff Bluetooth to date, so I'm not sure on the state of the art. Just IP networks, SPI, I2C, RS232 and some custom low level binary and analog stuff.
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Incidentally, I am taking this idea very seriously. I've sent emails to almost every woman I know already.
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@Weng By the way, I just came up with the perfect name if you decide to get that 3D printer. "Weng Wang"
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@Weng said in This sex toy tells the manufacturer every time you use it:
I do need a Bluetooth sniffer.
Something like the Ubertooth One maybe?
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Tomorrow's status thread post for @Weng:
Status: Received 2 death threats, 3 restraining orders, and a phone call from the FBI. No idea why I'm getting all these strange notifications.
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@Weng said in This sex toy tells the manufacturer every time you use it:
self-learning
Judging by my experiences when, um, self-learning, leaving the AI to figure it out for itself is probably not the best idea.
Especially if your idea for the algorithm is:
@Weng said in This sex toy tells the manufacturer every time you use it:
fuzzes your vag looking for rising temperature and seeks to maximize it.
(hint: that's much more easily achieved with a good soldering iron)
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@Maciejasjmj To be fair, it's already optimized for one known method: buzz in the right spots.
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@Yamikuronue said in This sex toy tells the manufacturer every time you use it:
it's already optimized for one known method: buzz in the right spots.
I assume that's merely a local optimum.
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YOU CAN TAKE YOUR IOT AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS!
{statement gets taken literally}
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@Weng Don't use an AI, let users on the internet see the data and operate it anonimously.
While they wait in the queue to "drive" the next girl using the toy you can show them advertisements.
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@groo I don't know if that's genius because there'll be so many pervy guys interested, or terrible because women will probably avoid it like the plague.
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@izzion said in This sex toy tells the manufacturer every time you use it:
Received 2 death threats, 3 restraining orders, and a phone call from the FBI
That depends, do you think the phone call from the FBI will be an inquiry to see when delivery is due?
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I guess I was more thinking that one of the recipients was a 14 year old girl @weng had met in an MMO chat room.
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@izzion said in This sex toy tells the manufacturer every time you use it:
I guess I was more thinking that one of the recipients was a 14 year old girl @weng had met in an MMO chat room.
FTFY
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@Yamikuronue said in This sex toy tells the manufacturer every time you use it:
@izzion Plot twist: I turn out to have met @weng in a chat room when I was 14
Plot twist: It turns out @weng actually is a 14 year old girl.
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@Yamikuronue Assuming you're not much younger than 30, that would have been IRC.
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@Weng said in This sex toy tells the manufacturer every time you use it:
@Yamikuronue Assuming you're not much younger than 30, that would have been IRC.
a/s/l
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@izzion So far I have 2 takers!
1 of whom allegedly hasn't gotten off in more than a decade.
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@Lorne-Kates said in This sex toy tells the manufacturer every time you use it:
@Weng said in This sex toy tells the manufacturer every time you use it:
@Yamikuronue Assuming you're not much younger than 30, that would have been IRC.
a/s/l
Ancient / probably / elsewhere
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@Weng FUCK YOU AOL FOREVER
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@Yamikuronue I am reminded of a part of a Whateley Academy piece called "Sara's Little Purple Book", an in-world sex manual for superhumans, specifically in the part for Gadgeteers and Devisors:
Vibrators are perfectly functional devices as they are. Unless you are a woman personalizing your own substitute companion, DO NOT attempt to ‘improve’ the vibrator. Consider that the testing phase will involve you walking up to a female and asking if they’d like to test it for you, and you’ll see why it’s so dangerous. Also, the abundance of little boys who have asked that very same question before dropping their pants means that you’re likely to get slapped long before you get a chance to explain that you’re perfectly serious.
She goes on to warn any potential guinea pigs,
In general, beware Devises. Unless your partner can show you that it works as it should, refrain and don’t try to operate the devise yourself (Note: deviCe (deev-ICE) is used to describe any piece of equipment no matter its origin. A deviSe (dee-VAIZE) is specifically used to describe a piece of equipment created by a Devisor). If your partner is a Devisor/Gadgeteer, always ask before touching anything.
ENSURE THAT YOUR PARTNER HAS FIELD TESTED ALL DEVICES THROUGHLY BEFORE YOU CONSENT TO HAVING THEM USED ON YOU. ‘It should work’ is not enough. Make sure it works exactly the way they say it does, ask for a demonstration, and, above all, treat any device that you haven’t seen in use as a deadly weapon.
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@Yamikuronue said in This sex toy tells the manufacturer every time you use it:
But the temperature, as a proxy for... what, frequency of use? Or are they trying to determine which hole it's in?
According to TFA, it's CPU temperature that is reported, for hardware diagnostic purposes. Sorry to be boring.
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@Fox said in This sex toy tells the manufacturer every time you use it:
@groo I don't know if that's genius because there'll be so many pervy guys interested, or terrible because women will probably avoid it like the plague.
Avoid? That's basically camgirls, reinvented.
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@Fox said in This sex toy tells the manufacturer every time you use it:
@groo I don't know if that's genius because there'll be so many pervy guys interested, or terrible because women will probably avoid it like the plague.
I could probably survive watching the ads while in the queue ...
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@Weng IRC or AOL chats, yeah. I was there.
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@ScholRLEA said in This sex toy tells the manufacturer every time you use it:
Make sure it works exactly the way they say it does, ask for a demonstration, and, above all, treat any device that you haven’t seen in use as a deadly weapon.
Do people in that universe not still test out vibrators against their arm before buying/using? >.>
@Scarlet_Manuka said in This sex toy tells the manufacturer every time you use it:
it's CPU temperature that is reported
Whew, much less creepy!
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@Yamikuronue said in This sex toy tells the manufacturer every time you use it:
test out vibrators against their arm
or you chin ... or so I'm told ...
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@Luhmann up a bit... up a bit...
I have to teach you everything, don't I? Sigh...