There, but not back again
-
It's almost that time of the year where I get to relocate (again). In particular, it's kinda time to start looking at the travel arrangements: more specifically, it's time to look for flights. The goal is essentially to get from City A (where I'm now), to City B (where I want to be). There is an airline operating out of City B and they offer direct flights from/to City A, so it shouldn't be that hard?
The obvious answer would seem to be a one-way trip. Let's fire up Google Flight and check the approximate prices. A direct flight (~1.5h) with the obvious operator sets you back about €300 (on the relevant dates).
The cheapest option for the same trip is about €65, but includes flying about 2h into essentially the wrong direction, spending 22 hours at the wrong airport and then flying for another 2.5h (surprisingly, in the right direction, this time). There's plenty of options in between those €65 and €300. For about €150 you can pay a visit to Oslo (so A -> Oslo -> B, and no Oslo is not exactly on route either), or to Prague and Hamburg (A -> Hamburg -> Prague -> B with two of the flights on propeller planes -- I'm actually almost tempted).
For funsies, I checked taking the detour via Athens, for a total of A -> Frankfurt -> Munich -> Athens -> Zürich -> B, which will still cost you less than those €300, albeit you have to stay a day in Athens and the other transfers aren't exactly great either. I'm not quite sure how far you can get, it seems Ankara is still (barely) within the €300 budget. Reykjavik, at €315, barely isn't, though.
Anyway. the less obvious answer (or, rather, what would be the less obvious one in a sane world; I was fully aware of this) is to book a return trip. Assuming you don't really care about the return date, you can get away with €120 (direct flights both ways). Prices vary less here, so 22h in Warsaw would knock only about €20 of those €120. If you hate your checked-in baggage, you could also go via Paris CDG for something in between. (I didn't play around with the multi-trip planner this time, though.)
Anyway, a direct flight will do fine. I'll probably go for the return trip, and use the opportunity to pay a visit to people I know here. Or something.
So, that's €120 for the cheapest option (no rebooking/refunding and no checked-in luggage). Luggage will be another €35 (they will also let you rebook for the low price of €70+difference in fare with this option). If you want to have a flexible ticket with no rebooking fee, that's plus €130 (they are feeling charitable here, because this also includes checked-in luggage, a few bonus frequent flier miles and apparently priority boarding, probably so that you can spend more time in the comfort of your cattle-class seat in the airplane). The flexibility would be nice, if it weren't for the fact that for €130 I could just get a new ticket instead. One that would -incidentally- include the necessary return trip to B for me.
Except. On the next screen you can add a few extras, including an option that allows you to rebook without fee (just the difference in fare) up to three times for €35. Feeling swindled yet? (No wait, you miss out on the extra frequent flyer miles with this option!)
If you're averse to traveling cattle class, the business class round trip is just €650 for the direct flight (and €350 if you can live with an extra stop somewhere in Europe). The one-way trip lowers the price by like €3 (so, yay, savings!). Except if you (again) hate your checked-in luggage, because then you can fly business class via Heathrow for about €300. (Rumor says that business class luggage is less likely to be lost, but let's not underestimate luggage-losing-powers of the likes of Heathrow and CDG.)
Eh. Seriously. What's up with this shit?
-
@cvi said in There, but not back again:
It's almost that time of the year where I get to relocate (again).
Cops are getting close, eh?
-
@mrl said in There, but not back again:
Cops are getting close, eh?
Hopefully the detour via all of Europe and plus Ankara will throw them off my trail a bit longer this time.
-
@cvi said in There, but not back again:
@mrl said in There, but not back again:
Cops are getting close, eh?
Hopefully the detour via all of Europe and plus Ankara will throw them off my trail a bit longer this time.
Just learn to hide bodies better already.
-
@mrl Might just bring them along. Nobody will rise an eyebrow at a few extra bodies in Ankara, with the recent political happenings there. :-/
-
@cvi Or see if you can lose them in the Heathrow luggage?
-
@cvi The worst part is they'll probably put you in a Airbus europlane.
BTW when naming that company, could they have chosen a more boring form of transit than a bus? How about aircruiseship? Or airzeppelin? Or airwildhorses?
-
-
@boomzilla
Great now I'm stuck with that theme song again
-
@boomzilla Hell yeah. I'd fly an Airwolf A-320.
-
-
@blakeyrat said in There, but not back again:
The worst part is they'll probably put you in a Airbus europlane.
I dunno. Economy class looks and feels (and tastes) a lot like economy class regardless of whether you're on a Boeing or an Airwolf.
-
@cvi I suppose that's true, but the Boeing was made by cooler people.
-
@cvi said in There, but not back again:
priority boarding, probably so that you can spend more time in the comfort of your cattle-class seat in the airplane
I've never understood why anyone would want this, much less pay extra for it.
-
@blakeyrat said in There, but not back again:
the Boeing was made by cooler people
That depends on which factory the Airbus was made in. Everett is definitely cooler than Seville and Mobile, but Toulouse is about the same temperature, and Hamburg and Tianjin are even cooler.
-
@hardwaregeek said in There, but not back again:
@cvi said in There, but not back again:
priority boarding, probably so that you can spend more time in the comfort of your cattle-class seat in the airplane
I've never understood why anyone would want this, much less pay extra for it.
The same reason literally everyone stands up as soon as the plane stops moving after landing, despite deboarding being minimal ten minutes.
-
@tsaukpaetra said in There, but not back again:
literally everyone stands up as soon as the plane stops moving after landing
Yeah, I don't do that, either.
-
@hardwaregeek said in There, but not back again:
@tsaukpaetra said in There, but not back again:
literally everyone stands up as soon as the plane stops moving after landing
Yeah, I don't do that, either.
Ditto. I just wait and gawk at the idiots.
-
@hardwaregeek said in There, but not back again:
I've never understood why anyone would want this, much less pay extra for it.
QFT.
The closest thing to an answer that I can guess at would be that you get early dibs on space for your over-sized hand baggage in the overhead storage. But if you're not traveling with over-sized hand baggage, that's not much of an issue.
@tsaukpaetra said in There, but not back again:
The same reason literally everyone stands up as soon as the plane stops moving after landing, despite deboarding being minimal ten minutes.
+1.
-
@blakeyrat said in There, but not back again:
BTW when naming that company, could they have chosen a more boring form of transit than a bus? How about aircruiseship? Or airzeppelin? Or airwildhorses?
You must be riding the wrong buses. And an airzeppelin brings thoughts of the Hindenburg to mind.
-
@blakeyrat said in There, but not back again:
Or airzeppelin?
... uh... as opposed to the normal, ground-based zeppelin?
-
@blakeyrat said in There, but not back again:
the Boeing was made by cooler people
That's enough about the climate in Seattle…
-
@scarlet_manuka said in There, but not back again:
... uh... as opposed to the normal, ground-based zeppelin?
I'm reimagining the Zeppelin as a mole machine, able to strike terror into the hearts of the enemy by its ability to cruise through the solid earth and deliver righteous punishment by advanced excavation! (Now we know what the Boring company are really up to…)
-
@cvi said in There, but not back again:
If you're adverse to traveling cattle class
Having travelled by Virgin Atlantic business class on a few flights, I'm almost infinitely averse(1) to travelling cattle class. Especially after the flights for a work jolly (all-hands meeting in Barcelona, much fun(2)) on Ryanair.
(1) "adverse" is a word, but it doesn't mean the same thing as "averse".
(2) Including a guided bicycle tour of the city, as a result of which I can confirm that it takes a lot longer than 25 years to forget how to ride a bike. (Seriously, before that trip I hadn't ridden a bike for 25 years, and I was able to get on the tour bike and immediately ride it without any problems.)
-
@dkf
Bonus points for making it in lead
-
@hardwaregeek said in There, but not back again:
@cvi said in There, but not back again:
priority boarding, probably so that you can spend more time in the comfort of your cattle-class seat in the airplane
I've never understood why anyone would want this, much less pay extra for it.
I have a handicap, so I get preferential treatment in most airports regarding boarding airplanes. I get to go before the schmucks that pay to go on first.
-
@pie_flavor said in There, but not back again:
@blakeyrat said in There, but not back again:
BTW when naming that company, could they have chosen a more boring form of transit than a bus? How about aircruiseship? Or airzeppelin? Or airwildhorses?
You must be riding the wrong buses. And an airzeppelin brings thoughts of the Hindenburg to mind.
I'd assume that airzeppelin offer in-flight concerts!
-
-
@blakeyrat said in There, but not back again:
@cvi The worst part is they'll probably put you in a Airbus europlane.
BTW when naming that company, could they have chosen a more boring form of transit than a bus? How about aircruiseship? Or airzeppelin? Or airwildhorses?
Still better than "Iron Bird".
OK, the company name is COMAC; "Iron Bird" was an early codename for their first model, the C919, at the time it was announced (it is scheduled to be rolled out this year). Still, the name didn't, ah, fly very well with potential customers, which is probably why it appears to have been dropped from later press releases.
China bets on 'Iron Bird' to compete with Airbus and Boeing – 01:14
— TomoNews US
https://youtu.be/K3qUwOv14lk
-
@scholrlea Only Chinese airlines are going to buy that thing, and only because the government glares at them really hard. And IIRC they're only good for local flights anyway, so no it's not a plane I'll fly on any time soon.
I assume "iron" in Chinese implies something other than iron the metal, because otherwise it's hard to imagine why anybody thought that would be a good name.
-
@blakeyrat said in There, but not back again:
I assume "iron" in Chinese implies something other than iron the metal, because otherwise it's hard to imagine why anybody thought that would be a good name.
Maybe “aluminium bird” isn't as poetic in Chinese?
-
@HardwareGeek said in There, but not back again:
@cvi said in There, but not back again:
priority boarding, probably so that you can spend more time in the comfort of your cattle-class seat in the airplane
I've never understood why anyone would want this, much less pay extra for it.
On Southwest (which AFAIK is the only airline without assigned seating), you can get a better pick of seats.
-
@carnage said in There, but not back again:
@hardwaregeek said in There, but not back again:
@cvi said in There, but not back again:
priority boarding, probably so that you can spend more time in the comfort of your cattle-class seat in the airplane
I've never understood why anyone would want this, much less pay extra for it.
I have a handicap, so I get preferential treatment in most airports regarding boarding airplanes. I get to go before the schmucks that pay to go on first.
I can kind of understand this, so that you can board without having to struggle through the aisle when it's crowded with people trying to stuff their too-big bags into the overhead compartments, but you're still spending extra time sitting in a not-comfortable seat.
-
@djls45 said in There, but not back again:
@HardwareGeek said in There, but not back again:
@cvi said in There, but not back again:
priority boarding, probably so that you can spend more time in the comfort of your cattle-class seat in the airplane
I've never understood why anyone would want this, much less pay extra for it.
On Southwest (which AFAIK is the only airline without assigned seating), you can get a better pick of seats.
True, but in my experience (and I've flown Southwest more than any other airline, I think), being in the first 1/3 or so of the cattle herd is adequate. It's not necessary, IMO, to get premium boarding.
-
@djls45 said in There, but not back again:
the only airline without assigned seating
I spy an American-centric post!
-
@pie_flavor said in There, but not back again:
@blakeyrat said in There, but not back again:
BTW when naming that company, could they have chosen a more boring form of transit than a bus? How about aircruiseship? Or airzeppelin? Or airwildhorses?
You must be riding the wrong buses. And an airzeppelin brings thoughts of the Hindenburg to mind.
Well, Hindenburg-like flight would certainly be once in a lifetime experience!
-
-
@Jaloopa said in There, but not back again:
@djls45 said in There, but not back again:
the only airline without assigned seating
I spy an American-centric post!
Well, I've only flown within the US and once from NYC to Tel Aviv and back, so that's been my experience. Do other airlines outside the USA have FCFS seating?
-
@doctorjones said in There, but not back again:
@steve_the_cynic said in There, but not back again:
Ryanair
Hahahahahahahahaha
That wasn't exactly my thought at the time, but yeah. At least now I know ...
Caveat lector: pretty much all the other air travel I've ever done was on "real" airlines. Apart from that one time when I took People Express from Boston to Orlando (and back). A not-to-be-repeated experience.
-
@cvi said in There, but not back again:
@hardwaregeek said in There, but not back again:
I've never understood why anyone would want this, much less pay extra for it.
QFT.
The closest thing to an answer that I can guess at would be that you get early dibs on space for your over-sized hand baggage in the overhead storage.
That's exactly the answer. The penalty for boarding after the overhead storage is full is having to wait for the checked bags when you land.
-
@dragnslcr At Sea-Tac, the luggage is there before you are.
When I visited Miami, though, goddamned. 45 minute before they even updated the screen telling you which luggage belt to wait by. So fucking slow.
-
@blakeyrat said in There, but not back again:
At Sea-Tac, the luggage is there before you are.
No.
I have family in the area. I fly in to Sea-Tac at least once a year (for Christmas) and more that that on most years. I have never, ever, ever seen the luggage reach the baggage claim before I did.
-
@masonwheeler Happened to me just a few weeks ago. Either way, Miami's airport was criminally sloooooooow.
-
@blakeyrat said in There, but not back again:
@masonwheeler Happened to me just a few weeks ago.
Lucky!
Either way, Miami's airport was criminally sloooooooow.
Wouldn't surprise me. I've never gotten off there (had a layover in Miami once, but didn't leave the airport) so thankfully I never had to experience it.
-
@hardwaregeek said in There, but not back again:
@cvi said in There, but not back again:
priority boarding, probably so that you can spend more time in the comfort of your cattle-class seat in the airplane
I've never understood why anyone would want this, much less pay extra for it.
Less time standing in line. You have to wait the same amount of time either way, but getting from lobby seat to plane seat quicker can reduce some of the suffering and allow you to spend more of your waiting time doing something productive or enjoyable. I don't think I'd especially pay extra for it, but it's been nice to get it when I go first class.
-
@steve_the_cynic said in There, but not back again:
(1) "adverse" is a word, but it doesn't mean the same thing as "averse".
Which is different yet again from ad verse.
-
@dreikin said in There, but not back again:
@hardwaregeek said in There, but not back again:
@cvi said in There, but not back again:
priority boarding, probably so that you can spend more time in the comfort of your cattle-class seat in the airplane
I've never understood why anyone would want this, much less pay extra for it.
Less time standing in line. You have to wait the same amount of time either way, but getting from lobby seat to plane seat quicker can reduce some of the suffering and allow you to spend more of your waiting time doing something productive or enjoyable. I don't think I'd especially pay extra for it, but it's been nice to get it when I go first class.
Line? What line? If your boarding group isn't called, you're still sitting in the terminal seat, some of which are quite comfortable. You're in a line of equal length no matter what group you're in.
-
@pie_flavor said in There, but not back again:
@dreikin said in There, but not back again:
@hardwaregeek said in There, but not back again:
@cvi said in There, but not back again:
priority boarding, probably so that you can spend more time in the comfort of your cattle-class seat in the airplane
I've never understood why anyone would want this, much less pay extra for it.
Less time standing in line. You have to wait the same amount of time either way, but getting from lobby seat to plane seat quicker can reduce some of the suffering and allow you to spend more of your waiting time doing something productive or enjoyable. I don't think I'd especially pay extra for it, but it's been nice to get it when I go first class.
Line? What line? If your boarding group isn't called, you're still sitting in the terminal seat, some of which are quite comfortable. You're in a line of equal length no matter what group you're in.
The line between getting your ticket scanned and getting in the seat. Getting in early can avoid the congestion that may happen. Not often a problem IME, but all it takes is one person blocking the aisle for an unnecessarily long time.
-
@dreikin I've never experienced one of those, even in the last boarding group at the back of the plane. Generally people budge into seat areas so you can move past if you ask. (Though maybe it's because I'm still a teenager.)
-
@dreikin said in There, but not back again:
Not often a problem IME, but all it takes is one person blocking the aisle for an unnecessarily long time.
It applies more when leaving the plane than when boarding, but I frequently use the line, "If you're standing in the aisle and you aren't moving, then you are wrong."