Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze
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@Tsaukpaetra
Better note the daughter of you-know-who too
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@Luhmann said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
@Tsaukpaetra
Better note the daughter of you-know-who tooOooh! Is she more available than @presidentsdaughter ?
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@Tsaukpaetra said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
more available
euh ... no comments on their respective availability
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This post is deleted!
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@Tsaukpaetra said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
@Akko said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
@Rhywden said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
@Akko said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
@Dragoon said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
@Jaloopa said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
That's where scurvy comes in
Just eat orange foods: Personally I prefer M&Ms, but it is hard to get only the orange ones outside of Halloween so I supplement with cheetos.
Don't eat too much orange food though, or you'll end up looking like You-Know-Who II.
The son of Voldemort?
Not exactly who I meant, but sure, if you want to interpret it that way ;)
Are there any other entities we should know about commonly referred to as "You-know-who"?
Well if you consider the additional information of "Don't eat too much orange food" I'm sure you can think of somebody. Additional Hint: He shares the first name of a well-known duck comic character ;)
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@Akko said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
a well-known duck comic character
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@Akko said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
@Tsaukpaetra said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
@Akko said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
@Rhywden said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
@Akko said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
@Dragoon said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
@Jaloopa said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
That's where scurvy comes in
Just eat orange foods: Personally I prefer M&Ms, but it is hard to get only the orange ones outside of Halloween so I supplement with cheetos.
Don't eat too much orange food though, or you'll end up looking like You-Know-Who II.
The son of Voldemort?
Not exactly who I meant, but sure, if you want to interpret it that way ;)
Are there any other entities we should know about commonly referred to as "You-know-who"?
Well if you consider the additional information of "Don't eat too much orange food" I'm sure you can think of somebody. Additional Hint: He shares the first name of a well-known duck comic character ;)
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@Akko said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
well-known duck comic character
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@Luhmann One like is insufficient!
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@Luhmann Funnily enough, I was going to post him, but thought Count Duckula would be funnier
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@RaceProUK said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
funnier
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@Luhmann Nah.
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Yeah I have to admit I only know one of those, I didn't really have access to comics or cartoons as a kid :|
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@Luhmann
???
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@Luhmann said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
Orange... Lorne... Nope, I got nothing...
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They're thinking too small.
https://checkout.teforia.com/collections/infusers/products/teforia-infuser
That's a 1000 dollar kettle which apparently makes shitty tea (if you come from a land that knows tea. By wrong-pondian standards it might be fantastic).
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@coldandtired i like chocolate tropical fruit tea
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@coldandtired said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
They're thinking too small.
https://checkout.teforia.com/collections/infusers/products/teforia-infuser
That's a 1000 dollar kettle which apparently makes shitty tea (if you come from a land that knows tea. By wrong-pondian standards it might be fantastic).
How well does it make iced tea?
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@coldandtired said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
That's a 1000 dollar kettle which apparently makes shitty tea (if you come from a land that knows tea. By wrong-pondian standards it might be fantastic).
It makes sweet tea?
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Ooh, I want to join the ing too
@coldandtired said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
shitty tea
Redundant phrase!
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Thar she goes...
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@akko Arnold?
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@hungrier Whatever that is scares me. Anyway, I know that kid from the magic schoolbus joined Trump's species temporarily at some point.
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@alexmedia said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
Thar she goes...
Good riddance to rubbish.
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@alexmedia Wondering what's gonna happen to those expensive juicer once the servers are offline
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IDK, but that sounds like a free $400 press for most people, considering they're offering refunds.
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@timebandit the thing was built to use proprietary bags, which are probably unavailable going forward. so its useless one way or other.
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@fwd Yeah you can't even use it as a normal juicer, because the fruit/whatever has to be put in a special bag with a nozzle on it. If you defeated the DRM you could probably rig up a reusable bag? (In fact, I wager someone has already.) But it'd be a bitch to clean between pressings.
EDIT: also remember the expose that the fruit/veggie packs have to be softened enough so they could be squeezed by hand. So even if you did mod it to be a normal press, it'd probably a very wimpy one compared to the $50 competitor you can get on Amazon.
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@magus said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
@hungrier Whatever that is scares me. Anyway, I know that kid from the magic schoolbus joined Trump's species temporarily at some point.
I'm pretty sure that would be:
on a global scale!
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@blakeyrat said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
even if you did mod it to be a normal press, it'd probably a very wimpy one compared to the $50 competitor you can get on Amazon.
The teardown that was posted earlier showed really nice parts on the interior -- which is why it's so expensive, because they didn't cut any corners whatsoever, when having less budget would have meant they'd come out with a better-designed, more economical product.
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@yamikuronue said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
when having less budget would have meant they'd come out with a better-designed, more economical product
Even better would have been having a giant budget but not being idiots. They could have come up with an economical product and have been able to fund the giant supply chain they wanted for much longer.
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@timebandit said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
@alexmedia Wondering what's gonna happen to those expensive juicer once the servers are offline
If they were decent people they'd send out a last firmware update to disable the entire internet thing and make it at least work like a normal press.
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@anonymous234 said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
@timebandit said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
@alexmedia Wondering what's gonna happen to those expensive juicer once the servers are offline
If they were decent people they'd send out a last firmware update to disable the entire internet thing and make it at least work like a normal press.
Fuck that. If I had the money, I'd buy the company in a fire sale then start releasing firmware updates to fuck with the rich idiots who bought this fucking things.
I can go subtle... maybe have it play random, very quiet haunting sounds. Hell, I bet I could even figure out how to personally identify which of the customers owns which units, and tailor the haunting sounds to spearfuck them. "This is grandma Mabel. You're making a mistake starring in that movie, John. You should pick that other script you wanted to do but your agent talked you out of..."
(Opening next week, John Travolta in My Whacky Hitler)
Or maybe I can go scorched earth. Especially if I can identify one of these owned by someone vile. Send a firmware update so that next night at 4am, it disables all throttling on the motor, and runs it full speed until it bursts into flame and burns the house down. (And there is no way you can convince me they did enough QA on these things to ensure it won't do this).
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@lorne-kates or you could make it make their juice taste a little weird
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@lorne-kates The first part is fantastically evil and I'd totally do that if I could (although I'm not sure if that thing has a speaker).
Burning down the house might be slightly illegal though.
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@anonymous234 said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
The first part is fantastically evil and I'd totally do that if I could (although I'm not sure if that thing has a speaker).
Just oscillate the motor appropriately...
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@lorne-kates said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
Or maybe I can go scorched earth. Especially if I can identify one of these owned by someone vile. Send a firmware update so that next night at 4am, it disables all throttling on the motor, and runs it full speed until it bursts into flame and burns the house down. (And there is no way you can convince me they did enough QA on these things to ensure it won't do this).
Sounds like exactly the kind of thing Cave Johnson would do.
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@the_quiet_one said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
@lorne-kates said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
Or maybe I can go scorched earth. Especially if I can identify one of these owned by someone vile. Send a firmware update so that next night at 4am, it disables all throttling on the motor, and runs it full speed until it bursts into flame and burns the house down. (And there is no way you can convince me they did enough QA on these things to ensure it won't do this).
Sounds like exactly the kind of thing Cave Johnson would do.
Nah, he'd just get his engineers to develop juicer-compatible packets of combustible lemons.
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@pie_flavor said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
lemons
Yes.
"Lemonaid"
:pee_the_joke_is_the_lemonaid_is_actually_pee_but_we_do_not_have_a_emoji_for_that:
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@lorne-kates said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
@pie_flavor said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
lemons
Yes.
"Lemonaid"
:pee_the_joke_is_the_lemonaid_is_actually_pee_but_we_do_not_have_a_emoji_for_that:
I think you killed the joke. I'm not sure.
Can you confirm that you do in fact know why combustible lemons are relevant?
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@pie_flavor said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
Can you confirm that you do in fact know why combustible lemons are relevant?
Backup plan in the extremely unlikely event that the motor actually has a failsafe shutdown.
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@lorne-kates said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
@pie_flavor said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
Can you confirm that you do in fact know why combustible lemons are relevant?
Backup plan in the extremely unlikely event that the motor actually has a failsafe shutdown.
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@adynathos said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
@dkf said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
Switching to a Z80-derivative is only going to save a few cents; they could cut the cost more by using less milling on the internal parts…
For a device that does not need any chip at all, or even electricity.
Come for the dildo-shaped handle... stay for the free OJ at the end!
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@anotherusername said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
Come for the dildo-shaped handle... stay for the free OJ at the end!
Oh yeah well what if I want to juice a square watermelon, what then asshole, huh? HUH?
#Juicero4Lyfe
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@lorne-kates said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
@anotherusername said in Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze:
Come for the dildo-shaped handle... stay for the free OJ at the end!
Oh yeah well what if I want to juice a square watermelon, what then asshole, huh? HUH?
#Juicero4Lyfe