The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably)
-
@Tsaukpaetra
That depends on your whiteness
-
@Luhmann said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
@Tsaukpaetra
That depends on your whitenessI'm no longer nearly as white as I was before in any case. But my genetics are pretty efficient in that regard, I don't burn easily.
-
@Luhmann said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
@Tsaukpaetra said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
I bake myself every day
That's a euphemism, right?
@Gąska said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
mandatory school reading of Prus's Antek. Specifically that part where Antek's sister falls ill and their grandma decides the best treatment is to put her in the kitchen oven - I repeat, put the sick child in the kitchen oven - for the duration of rosary prayer.
-
@Applied-Mediocrity said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
@Gąska said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
mandatory school reading of Prus's Antek. Specifically that part where Antek's sister falls ill and their grandma decides the best treatment is to put her in the kitchen oven - I repeat, put the sick child in the kitchen oven - for the duration of rosary prayer.
The wife has a strange habit of quoting the description of said sister after the oven was opened. Just in case anyone has any doubt: yes, it was lit.
-
status: I've been wondering why there was an inexplicable hole in my back.
Perhaps it's time for a new mattress?
-
@Tsaukpaetra your back looks like you're SpongeBob SquarePants
-
@sockpuppet7 said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
@Tsaukpaetra your back looks like you're SpongeBob SquarePants
Those are the holes for the stabby stabbies that were making holes in my person.
-
Status: I think the bitch has a cyst on her vulva. Doing my best to keep her mind off of it and licking.
Sorry, girl, but that's not my kink...
-
status: ejaculate smells different today. I wonder if it's because I'm sick...
-
@Tsaukpaetra said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
status: ejaculate smells different today. I wonder if it's because I'm sick...
You should try not ejaculating (even in your sleep) for a year or two. It smells real funny the first time then.
-
@Carnage said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
@Tsaukpaetra said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
status: ejaculate smells different today. I wonder if it's because I'm sick...
You should try not ejaculating (even in your sleep) for a year or two. It smells real funny the first time then.
BTDT, it didn't, really. Seems to have acquired more smells since then, actually.
-
@Tsaukpaetra In my experience, smell shifts around naturally over time. Doesn't have to smell the same every time.
-
Status: I wish that the full measure would come forth.
It's really annoying to have a small amount remain inside and leak out later, especially if "later" is after a nice shower.
It's even more annoying when this results in a rather painful adhesion to the holding fabric, which becomes akin to ripping off duct tape off the affected area.
-
@Tsaukpaetra This is theorized as one of the reasons urination becomes an allegedly uncontrollable urge a few minutes afterward.
-
@TwelveBaud said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
an allegedly uncontrollable urge
Is it? Huh. Adding subroutine...
Also, it doesn't seem to help....
-
I could smell the jalapeños on their way out.
-
-
Status: it appears testicles are less dense than water....? 🤔
-
Status: skin tear error.
Leaking plasma. Probably should air my wrist out I guess.
-
Great, another security breach. As if there weren't enough already.
-
@Zerosquare said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
Great, another security breach. As if there weren't enough already.
I blame service fabric being so dodgy lately...
-
Status: Was drinking water. Said water apparently had a small hair in it. Hair is now stuck to left tonsil, and being annoying.
Now attempting to reduce gag reflex in preparation to attempt hair removal, since standard methods are proving ineffective...
-
I'm so damn tired of shitting blood.
-
@Gribnit said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
I'm so damn tired of shitting blood.
Sounds like you need to stop putting a frozen potato in there.
-
@Gribnit said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
I'm so damn tired of shitting blood.
Maybe try bleeding shit?
-
There was about a forearm's length of loose thread coming down out the back of my sweatshirt.
I've learned this as I was wiping myself after pooping.
-
@Tsaukpaetra said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
@Gribnit said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
I'm so damn tired of shitting blood.
Sounds like you need to stop putting a frozen potato in there.
I don't freeze potatoes
-
@Tsaukpaetra said in The Official Status Thread:
@Gribnit said in The Official Status Thread:
@Tsaukpaetra said in The Official Status Thread:
Status: Eating that sausage was a terrible idea...
Maybe it was a good idea, but it was somebody else's.
Regardless, now I'm managing a lot more distracting things originating from my stomach, and I'm not happy...
Status: for system integrity, a purge has been initiated. Please stop consuming that kind of shit, user.
-
All damn day with this crap.
-
status: Holy shit, what is going on down there? Some really concerning noises emanating by for the last few hours...
-
*reboots @Tsaukpaetra*
-
@Zerosquare said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
*reboots @Tsaukpaetra*
No, wait, that momentarily relaxes all muscles---!
-
@Zerosquare said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
*reboots @Tsaukpaetra*
You broke it you clean it
-
I didn't break him. I mean, it's not like he is more broken than he was before.
-
Status: .... That's a cum stain!
-
Does anybody know the registry key I should edit to dial back the level of @Tsaukpaetra's oversharing?
-
@Zerosquare said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
Does anybody know the registry key I should edit to dial back the level of @Tsaukpaetra's oversharing?
it's the same one that controls the Planck constant don't fuck with it
-
@Zerosquare There should be a group policy setting for that. Or maybe a forum policy setting.
-
Status: Solid, frequent.
-
@Zerosquare said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
Does anybody know the registry key I should edit to dial back the level of @Tsaukpaetra's oversharing?
Just delete the registry to be safe.
-
@Zerosquare said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
Does anybody know the registry key I should edit to dial back the level of @Tsaukpaetra's oversharing?
It's broken.
-
@Zecc said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
@Zerosquare said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
Does anybody know the registry key I should edit to dial back the level of @Tsaukpaetra's oversharing?
It's broken.
And the Last Known Good Configuration is corrupted, so recovery is interesting.
-
@Tsaukpaetra said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
@Zecc said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
@Zerosquare said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
Does anybody know the registry key I should edit to dial back the level of @Tsaukpaetra's oversharing?
It's broken.
And the Last Known Good Configuration is corrupted, so recovery is interesting.
Just wipe it down repeatedly with something that works well on protein stains.
Not too repeatedly, mind.
-
Is it weird I almost kinda find the operation of the Zip drive a little erotic?
Cute little head diving in and out of the slot as it frantically reads data is kinda unf.
-
@Tsaukpaetra said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
Is it weird
Knowing you, is anything weird anymore?
-
@Zerosquare said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
@Tsaukpaetra said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
Is it weird
Knowing you, is anything weird anymore?
I don't really know, that's why I seek external input.
-
@Tsaukpaetra said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
@Zerosquare said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
@Tsaukpaetra said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
Is it weird
Knowing you, is anything weird anymore?
I don't really know, that's why I seek external input.
But nobody else does either.
-
@Gribnit said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
@Tsaukpaetra said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
@Zerosquare said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
@Tsaukpaetra said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
Is it weird
Knowing you, is anything weird anymore?
I don't really know, that's why I seek external input.
But nobody else does either.
Need input!
-
My legs are almost back to their pre SCI days of muscles. And the thing that made it happen wasn't weight training or rehab, but rather fucking for an hour or two every day for a month or two.
Doctors should prescribe fucking instead of rehab.
-
@Carnage said in The 'Nobody Overshares Worse Than This!' thread (NSFW, probably):
Doctors should prescribe fucking instead of rehab.
I hear it's also good at chemical balancing, or something.