Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition
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@JBert OTOH, the anal plug is far more usable on the "incorrect" picture.
:*that*_thread_is_:arrows:::paging_@error:etc.
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@remi Now we know what you do with your balls.
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@dkf also it's only a matter of time before someone mentions those, so I might as well do it myself.
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@boomzilla I thought for certain he was going to crash into the tanker and it would blow up... Am disappointed.
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Lots of great costume ideas out there this year...
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@boomzilla
Australian wildlife thread is
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@Luhmann said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
@boomzilla
Australian wildlife thread isThat's a UK sign (see the website address at the bottom).
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I need to watch out for those damn owls again, don't I? *sigh*
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@dkf said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
@Luhmann said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
@boomzilla
Australian wildlife thread isThat's a UK sign (see the website address at the bottom).
...
I need to watch out for those damn owls again, don't I? *sigh*
so you didn't export those owls together with criminals and other dangerous animals?
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@Luhmann said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
@dkf said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
@Luhmann said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
@boomzilla
Australian wildlife thread isThat's a UK sign (see the website address at the bottom).
...
I need to watch out for those damn owls again, don't I? *sigh*
so you didn't export those owls together with criminals and other dangerous animals?
Owls are a renewable resource.
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@dkf said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
I need to watch out for those damn owls again, don't I? *sigh*
All the rain up your way probably keeps the fire at bay at least
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@loopback0 said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
All the rain up your way probably keeps the fire at bay at least
Mostly been showers — the owls were not on fire overnight — but the weather's been better during the daytime.
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@dkf said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
but the weather's been better during the daytime.
That's fine - most owls are nocturnal
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This could go in the Unexpected Backfire thread, but it doesn't really deserve to be in the
.Anti-Helmet Atty Dies in Motorcycle Accident w/o Helmet – 10:49
— Steve LehtoTL:DW (and failure to embed):
Anti-Helmet Atty Dies in Motorcycle Accident w/o Helmet
Florida attorney who was instrumental in getting Florida's helmet law overturned and his girlfriend died in a crash while not wearing helmets. He might have considered that a good tradeoff for decades of riding without a helmet, had he known what was going to happen, or not; we'll never know.
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@HardwareGeek said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
Anti-Helmet Atty Dies in Motorcycle Accident w/o Helmet
FloridaThe at-shaming thread is
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Snow, Ice Hazard Everyone Should Be Aware Of Prompts New Law In Pennsylvania - Videos from The Weather Channel
Buildup of snow and ice on vehicles can become dislodged while driving, and Pennsylvania just required its removal within 24 hours of a storm by law. - Videos from The Weather Channel | weather.com
I'm sure that will totally make those idiots that don't clean their cars before driving down the highway reconsider their moronity.
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@izzion said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
Pennsylvania just required its removal within 24 hours of a storm by law
Either that's more lenient than the general law, or the general law was patently stupid. Because sensibly it should be saying before commencing driving on public road.
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@HardwareGeek said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
it doesn't really deserve to be in the
.died in a crash while not wearing helmets. He might have considered that a good tradeoff for decades of riding without a helmet
I mean, he asked for it!
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I meant to post this last night, but forgot until I saw @topspin's post
.Dear Mr. Ricebox Driver,
Your car with a resonant, low-pitched exhaust system, but so badly tuned that it backfires repeatedly every time you let off the accelerator, is not as impressive as you think it is.
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@HardwareGeek said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
so badly tuned that it backfires repeatedly every time you let off the accelerator
It's called a crackle tune and it's really stupid
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@TimeBandit Better than this tune, though: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ What? Why did that embed when "properly" pasted URLs don't?
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Would the helmet have actually saved his life though?
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@Dragoon Maybe. Maybe not. Who
? 
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Today in dumbshittery: So I drove down an offramp that ends in a 4-way intersection with a road crossing left-right and a gas station across. There was a car standing at the end of the ramp, no turn signal and on the middle-right side so I assumed it was going across. I, going left, turned on my signal and got up on the left of him as one does as the end is wide enough for that. So the one already at the intersection drove out, with cars coming from both directions forcing them to brake, and turned left. Still no signal. Amazing.
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@boomzilla you're right! it zoomed in instead of played at all!
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I can therefore assume this person has seen someone with both doors open as to make the hose pass through the car.
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Found while scrolling a bit from a previous link here. Many threads it could go to...
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@remi said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
Found while scrolling a bit from a previous link here. Many threads it could go to...
Paging @Polygeekery to the bright red phone.
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@Zecc want. I want two. One needs to face rearward for tailgaters and those who drive behind me with their brights on.
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@Zecc said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
Paging @Polygeekery to the bright red phone.
Also @Polygeekery during his construction days (and still fitting for this thread, I guess):
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@remi tricks like that aren't really that hard to do once you get comfortable with a machine. That being said, I probably wouldn't attempt something like that. You're going to starve the engine for oil when it is tipped that far. Probably. Maybe. It would depend on where the oil pickup is at. If it is in the oilpan closest to the front of the machine you would probably be fine for a limited period of time. If it is in the center or rear you're eventually going to end up doing some damage.
Excavators and track loaders can do some pretty impressive tricks. Like how an excavator can traverse a sheer dropoff that is nearly as high as the tracks are long. For a Cat 385 you can walk one off of or up a ~10' drop with no drama.
Probably the most impressed anyone was with something I did on a machine was on a bulldozer. I spent a shift loading a classifying plant with a 980 loader and during my shift I had worked far enough into the pile that we started getting into material that had been there for a very long time. It was extremely hard and production really suffered. So after my shift was done and the next guy took over I decided to hop on a bulldozer and hog (push bulk material quickly) material off of the top of the pile down to where the loader was working so he had loose material to help get our production numbers back up. It was a Cat D10R carry dozer and I was pushing off a highwall that was probably close to 100' tall. I would carry a full blade to the edge and use it to break off the edge to loosen up more material more quickly along with making my task marginally safer. Sort of. Pushing off of a highwall like I was doing is usually a big safety no-no, and for good reason. But there's never time to do it
right but there's always time to do it twice......if you're not killed by falling 100'.If you want to hog material effectively you do what is called "slot dozing". You start cutting a slot and the deeper the slot gets the more material you can push as the slot keeps the material in front of your blade since it cannot fall out the side. When you get in a good groove you can kind of feel the machine squat down and the turbo spools up to max and you are shoving all the dirt that you can before you break traction. On carry dozers you can tip the blade back (so that it carries more material in the U of the blade) and when you get to the end of your shove you hit a button on the controls and it will tip forward to clear the material off of the blade. They're pretty cool machines.
So on each shove I was breaking off the edge of the highwall. But on one particular shove, and due to me running a 170,000lb machine right up to the very edge of a 100' wall it didn't break off in front of me. It broke off behind me. Suddenly I was on a gigantic chunk of sand sliding/falling 100'. So I dropped my blade which gathered a bunch of material in front of the machine and when I got close to the bottom I raised my blade up and built a perfect ramp out of my slow(ish) nearly vertical slide/fall. I tracked right out of the situation, looked around to make sure everything was alright and started tracking my way back up to the top of the pile to get back to work. Several people got on the radio and congratulated me on saving the machine, and, ya know, not dying or getting the machine stuck with its blade jammed in the dirt at the bottom.
But truth be told, I nearly shit myself when the ground broke off underneath of my machine. I dropped my blade in an attempt to preserve my own life. Raising the blade at the end and making that perfect ramp was more luck than skill as when I approached the bottom I barely realized what was about to happen and I only narrowly avoided getting the dozer jammed into the ground and entirely stuck to where it would have taken hours to extract. In addition, I tracked away back to the top of the pile to calm my nerves where no one could see just how fucking rattled I was at what had just happened.
But to everyone that was around it certainly looked impressive and like I knew exactly what to do even though inside that cab I was muttering "Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck" the entire time it was occurring. While it may be true that an inexperienced operator almost certainly would have either ended up with the machine stuck and/or themselves severely injured or dead, my outcome was a lot more luck than skill.
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@Polygeekery said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
Several people got on the radio and congratulated me on saving the machine, and, ya know, not dying
In that order.
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@Zecc said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
In that order.
Most likely. Cabs can get smelly if you don't get all the pink paste out of them after particularly dramatic workplace fatalities.
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I realize that a lot of what I said in that post probably doesn't make much sense. Probably in much the same way as when we nerds talk about our work around the computer illiterate. Those who are blissfully ignorant of the hellscape that forms the foundation for the technology that they use every day.
Here is a Caterpillar D10R:
Now imagine it sliding down a near vertical 100' cliff.
Here is the cab of a newer model:
On your left hand is your direction-steering-gear selection. On D9 and larger dozers they are what are referred to as "fingertip controls". You control the steering with your middle and ring fingers and change direction and gear with your thumb. Steering is done with a clutch-brake. Pull the paddle a little and it modulates the engagement of the clutch on that side. Pull it beyond the point where the clutch disengages and it will start engaging the steering brake on that side.
On the right are the controls for your implements. The joystick that sticks up controls your blade. Farther to the right are the controls for your ripper, the big hook thing on the back. At your feet is this:
The pedal on the right is your decelerator. It works the opposite of the accelerator in your car. Let off the pedal to go to wide open throttle. You are at wide open throttle nearly constantly so it works as a decelerator to decrease operator fatigue. On big dozers you don't ever really use it at all. At most you may tap the decelerator when changing directions but it is usually unnecessary. You can change directions at wide open throttle without issue. On smaller dozers where you do more detail work you use it constantly, such as to slow the machine when working in tight spaces, etc.
Also, dozers with conventional transmissions have 3 gears but you always run them in second gear. You may use third when backing up for your next pass but it is frowned upon because using third gear significantly increases the wear on the undercarriage. Dozers with fingertip controls are also hard to control in reverse because without a load in front of the machine the clutch does fuckall to steer. You have to apply the steering brake to start turning if the machine is not under load. Dozers with differential steering or hydrostatic drive are much easier to control at the higher speeds. Just don't go doing it while the owner of the company is around.
The pedal on the left, predictably, is the service brake. You almost literally never use it. You may go weeks operating a bulldozer and never touch it. I have never known of a dozer to ever get the brake shoes changed on the service brakes. Even with tens of thousands of hours on the dozer the service brakes will still be essentially new. When you do need to use them they are still so new that they almost instantly lock up since they are in no way worn in.
Those two stirrup looking things on the floor are where you rest your feet. You will notice that the one on the left is far from the brake pedal. That is how little it is used. The one on the right is setup so that when you catch the heel of your boot on it your foot is essentially at rest while touching the decelerator.
When I went off the stockpile I was standing on those footrests and bracing myself on the hand controls so that I did not fall into the windshield. Looking through the front glass was the ground. I would guess that I was ~15 degrees from being perfectly vertical. Dropping the blade to get the dirt I needed to slow my fall and ramp myself out at the end was part instinct and partly because I pushed the blade control forward as a result of using it to prevent myself from falling out of the seat. Before anyone asks, yes all machines have seatbelts and almost no one uses them. They don't have inertial locks like cars do because the speeds involved are much lower. They ratchet and if you do wear it as the work day goes on and you are bounced around it keeps getting tighter and tighter until you have to stop and reset it. Pull up on a jobsite in a white 4x4 work truck and if you look closely you might be able to see all the operators covertly put on their seatbelts. They will unlatch them right after you drive away.
Now imagine that the bulldozer hits the ground at that near vertical angle. If you don't have enough speed to injure yourself, you are still stuck nearly vertical, with your blade stuck into the ground, completely unable to back up to free your blade. You're just stuck. Blade jammed into the ground, unable to back up a ~500% slope. There are also not many machines that can essentially dead lift 170,000lbs. So you have to dig a ramp to get it free. A gigantic goddamn ramp for a machine that size.
I also remember that as I neared the bottom and realized that I needed to raise my blade to ramp out and avoid getting stuck that I lifted my foot off the decelerator and started speeding up as I was still in gear. Your implements are hydraulic and the hydraulic pump is driven by the engine so they need full throttle to move quickly. At the last moment I shifted into neutral and went wide open throttle to raise the blade and saw the two outside blade tips barely nick the existing ground.
Speaking of luck, I already mentioned what happens if you don't ramp out soon enough, guess what happens if you ramp out too soon. You either fall the distance that you have left to go or nose over and jam your blade in the ground and get stuck. If you're lucky you can probably back up from there and get yourself out but you are definitely going to eat the windshield.
I got unbelievably lucky.
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@Polygeekery said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
I realize that a lot of what I said in that post probably doesn't make much sense. Probably in much the same way as when we nerds talk about our work around the computer illiterate. Those who are blissfully ignorant of the hellscape that forms the foundation for the technology that they use every day.
Here is a Caterpillar D10R:
Now imagine it sliding down a near vertical 100' cliff.
Here is the cab of a newer model:
On your left hand is your direction-steering-gear selection. On D9 and larger dozers they are what are referred to as "fingertip controls". You control the steering with your middle and ring fingers and change direction and gear with your thumb. Steering is done with a clutch-brake. Pull the paddle a little and it modulates the engagement of the clutch on that side. Pull it beyond the point where the clutch disengages and it will start engaging the steering brake on that side.
On the right are the controls for your implements. The joystick that sticks up controls your blade. Farther to the right are the controls for your ripper, the big hook thing on the back. At your feet is this:
The pedal on the right is your decelerator. It works the opposite of the accelerator in your car. Let off the pedal to go to wide open throttle. You are at wide open throttle nearly constantly so it works as a decelerator to decrease operator fatigue. On big dozers you don't ever really use it at all. At most you may tap the decelerator when changing directions but it is usually unnecessary. You can change directions at wide open throttle without issue. On smaller dozers where you do more detail work you use it constantly, such as to slow the machine when working in tight spaces, etc.
Also, dozers with conventional transmissions have 3 gears but you always run them in second gear. You may use third when backing up for your next pass but it is frowned upon because using third gear significantly increases the wear on the undercarriage. Dozers with fingertip controls are also hard to control in reverse because without a load in front of the machine the clutch does fuckall to steer. You have to apply the steering brake to start turning if the machine is not under load. Dozers with differential steering or hydrostatic drive are much easier to control at the higher speeds. Just don't go doing it while the owner of the company is around.
The pedal on the left, predictably, is the service brake. You almost literally never use it. You may go weeks operating a bulldozer and never touch it. I have never known of a dozer to ever get the brake shoes changed on the service brakes. Even with tens of thousands of hours on the dozer the service brakes will still be essentially new. When you do need to use them they are still so new that they almost instantly lock up since they are in no way worn in.
Those two stirrup looking things on the floor are where you rest your feet. You will notice that the one on the left is far from the brake pedal. That is how little it is used. The one on the right is setup so that when you catch the heel of your boot on it your foot is essentially at rest while touching the decelerator.
When I went off the stockpile I was standing on those footrests and bracing myself on the hand controls so that I did not fall into the windshield. Looking through the front glass was the ground. I would guess that I was ~15 degrees from being perfectly vertical. Dropping the blade to get the dirt I needed to slow my fall and ramp myself out at the end was part instinct and partly because I pushed the blade control forward as a result of using it to prevent myself from falling out of the seat. Before anyone asks, yes all machines have seatbelts and almost no one uses them. They don't have inertial locks like cars do because the speeds involved are much lower. They ratchet and if you do wear it as the work day goes on and you are bounced around it keeps getting tighter and tighter until you have to stop and reset it. Pull up on a jobsite in a white 4x4 work truck and if you look closely you might be able to see all the operators covertly put on their seatbelts. They will unlatch them right after you drive away.
Now imagine that the bulldozer hits the ground at that near vertical angle. If you don't have enough speed to injure yourself, you are still stuck nearly vertical, with your blade stuck into the ground, completely unable to back up to free your blade. You're just stuck. Blade jammed into the ground, unable to back up a ~500% slope. There are also not many machines that can essentially dead lift 170,000lbs. So you have to dig a ramp to get it free. A gigantic goddamn ramp for a machine that size.
I also remember that as I neared the bottom and realized that I needed to raise my blade to ramp out and avoid getting stuck that I lifted my foot off the decelerator and started speeding up as I was still in gear. Your implements are hydraulic and the hydraulic pump is driven by the engine so they need full throttle to move quickly. At the last moment I shifted into neutral and went wide open throttle to raise the blade and saw the two outside blade tips barely nick the existing ground.
Speaking of luck, I already mentioned what happens if you don't ramp out soon enough, guess what happens if you ramp out too soon. You either fall the distance that you have left to go or nose over and jam your blade in the ground and get stuck. If you're lucky you can probably back up from there and get yourself out but you are definitely going to eat the windshield.
I got unbelievably lucky.
I guess ${SUPREME_DIETY} must have had a plan for you making all of us endlessly entertained and thus intervened on your behalf
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@izzion said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
I guess ${SUPREME_DIETY} must have had a plan for you making all of us endlessly entertained
Entertained....annoyed......infuriated. It depends on the person and the day.
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@Polygeekery said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
@izzion said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
I guess ${SUPREME_DIETY} must have had a plan for you making all of us endlessly entertained
Entertained....annoyed......infuriated. It depends on the person and the time of day.
For those of us who hang out here, we typically need a little more granularity.
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@Polygeekery said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
Entertained....annoyed......infuriated. It depends on the person and the day.
You and @blakeyrat, even when you're annoying and infuriating, you're still entertaining.
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@HardwareGeek said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
You and @blakeyrat, even when you're annoying and infuriating, you're still entertaining.
I don't know if that is a high compliment or a low insult.
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@Polygeekery said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
@HardwareGeek said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
You and @blakeyrat, even when you're annoying and infuriating, you're still entertaining.
I don't know if that is a high compliment or a low insult.
Bear in mind, @blakeyrat hasn't done anything for years. Definitely a compliment, considering the source.
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@boomzilla said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
Ah yeah, Adapter pattern
ed. façade
Your face, Ed.
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@boomzilla said in Driving Anti-Patterns - Necro Edition:
I would love to see them back up a road with a bend in it with that.
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