Tinder is shit
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@boomzilla You hacked my account?
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PROTIP:
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@boomzilla Or it takes laziness. Both are applicable.
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Over in the gay world, security problems are fixed with DMCA:
Grindr Playing DMCA Whac-A-Mole With Privacy Threat 'Fuckr' * TorrentFreak
Back in March, it was revealed that Grindr could be exploited to expose the personal information of its users. Two months later, a further report noted that it was still possible to extract personal information from Grindr using a third-party app called "Fuckr". Following an initial takedown from...
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@topspin: if it was a joke, I would say that Grindr
-ed hard by thinking a DMCA would fix this.But a security fuck-up that could cause people to have their life ruined or threatened is really not funny.
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@Zerosquare I guess they thought that's protecting their users?
Now that it's got a DMCA takedown on github, I want to see it though. (For technical reasons, really). I've always thought that if I knew how to talk to their API it would be trivially easy to triangulate people, fake GPS positions, etc.
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This attack has already been used on other services with similar "nearby users" functionality. As far as I remember, they ended up degrading the location info precision to mitigate the risks. I don't think it's possible to really fix the underlying issue without removing the feature.
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“circumventing a technological measure that ineffectively controls access to a work”
FTF Grindr. If they allow access to the information, it will be used. So if they are serious about protecting their users, they'll have to do something about that rather than just pointing a finger and whining "but they're not supposed to!"
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@ixvedeusi said in Tinder is shit:
“circumventing a technological measure that ineffectively controls access to a work”
FTF Grindr. If they allow access to the information, it will be used. So if they are serious about protecting their users, they'll have to do something about that rather than just pointing a finger and whining "but they're not supposed to!"
That is unfortunately a general problem with DMCA and similar DRM-circumventing laws. The "effective" controls being circumvented are usually between ineffective and outright trivial.
(With a little pedantry you could even argue that if they were effective you couldn't circumvent them to begin with.)Anyways, providing location info with the API and then using the UI layer to not show them to their full extent is obviously not effective.
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@topspin said in Tinder is shit:
(With a little pedantry you could even argue that if they were effective you couldn't circumvent them to begin with.)
The whole DMCA thing is basically attempting to put the cat back into the bag after it has escaped. And ignoring the vast amount of evidence that shows that this work neither as prevention nor remediation.
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@topspin said in Tinder is shit:
[...] if they were effective you couldn't circumvent them to begin with.
That was basically my initial thought when I read that wording in the article, yes.
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@boomzilla My spidey sense tells me some forum member is reading this thinking “worth it!”
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@antiquarian said in Tinder is shit:
This is a very good way to widen your social circle. You just have to sign up for meetups involving things you're interested in.
I don't think the folks at Alcoholics Anonymous would be very amused.
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@HardwareGeek said in Tinder is shit:
This thread has taken a turn in a direction that I have some experience in. Whether my experience is useful to anyone else, well, I'll let you be the judge of that.
I used to be very shy and socially awkward, probably as much so as most of you, if not moreso. I did a few things that gradually, little by little, overcame the shyness and lack of social skills. For the most part, I didn't do them to meet people or acquire skills; I did them because I enjoyed doing them. This really is the key, I think; do things you enjoy (or think you might enjoy), without any expectation of meeting anyone (especially a romantic interest), just because you enjoy them — as long as they involve a group of some sort — sitting at home playing Skyrim isn't going to help your social life.
There are odd exceptions to that rule. I did meet one of my exes on an online game, but I don't suggest it as an effective mechanism as you will meet far more catfish and trolls.
Although I personally recommend dancing, find something you're passionate about — as long as it involves other people — try a few things if you don't already have a passion; you might be surprised at what clicks — and spend time with other people who like the same thing. Don't go into it trying to find someone; go into it to enjoy the activity. Friendships will develop naturally (mostly, you may have to push yourself to participate in conversations at first) from the shared interest. Some of them may go beyond that limited realm, some won't. That's ok; just enjoy the moment without worrying about the next step.
My present frustration is that most of my interests seem to lend themselves to groups with a 90:10 male-female ratio. One such group once had a more even distribution (say 60:40), but then some breakups and related drama caused a lot of regulars to disappear, so it then converged back to 90:10. I wish there was some way to search on meetup.com for groups by gender ratio of active members, but as far as I can tell, most of the high-female-population meetups seem to be along the lines of "Springfield Moms" or "Lesbians of Shelbyville," and not exactly situations you'd consider to make for good hunting grounds.
Wow, that's a long wall of text. I hope there was something useful, or at least interesting, in it.
The worst thing that can happen of it is that you get practice dealing with different types of people from different walks of life.
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@antiquarian said in Tinder is shit:
@Benjamin-Hall said in Tinder is shit:
My problem with meetup is that I don't know what I'm interested in (beyond some non-social things).
If you live near a major city and have some disposable income, I would suggest a foodie meetup. At the very least, you'll be introduced to some nice new restaurants.
Those are fun as long as they're suburban enough that logistics are easy. I see some events that would require me to either brave the sea of potholes in search of the ever elusive City Parking Space that's Close to Where You're Going™, or drive to a subway station and ride the subway for half an hour into the heart of the city and then walk a mile or two to the actual restaurant, and do that in the reverse on the way home. By that point, the restaurant had better be serving gold-sprinkled entrées, and all your companions had all better be single and 8/10 or higher.
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@mott555 said in Tinder is shit:
I think I'm stuck in the wrong generation, and that seems to make dating impossible.
You also came of age while the rules of engagement with respect to relationships were being rapidly rewritten under your feet.
I'm a millennial who doesn't act like a millennial. Most of my social circle is composed of people twice my age because those are the people I get along with best. Most people about my age seem to be from a completely different universe than me. Sometimes even basic communication is nearly impossible.
I go to car meetups and a good chunk of the people there are twenty years older.
Many of my friends own Priuses, and some of them don't see themselves owning a car in ten years.I'm sure a good part of that is due to the city/rural divide. As kids, we were always waking up at 2:00 AM on a school night because the cattle busted a fence and were standing in the middle of the highway again, while the city kids my age were generally jobless, living with their parents, and playing The Sims and Farmville until age 30. Our priorities, life experiences, and work ethics are completely out-of-phase as a result.
I would criticize you for writing off all those city folk with such a blanket statement, except I've been guilty of the same. Yes, stereotypes exist for a reason, but there might be someone compatible you're overlooking.
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@Benjamin-Hall said in Tinder is shit:
One of my biggest regrets is not actually trying/practicing dating back when it was "easy"
HINT: It's never easy.
(when I was around a bunch of single people my age, aka college/high school). So yes. Be grateful. Be very grateful.
How do you know they were single? People were pairing up by freshman/sophomore year in high school, and basically jumped laterally to new relationships once the old ones ran their course. And how do you figure it'd play out differently if you were given a second chance at it? You're approaching this hypothetical from the standpoint of someone who has the wisdom gained from your experience to-date, not from that of a 15-year-old who doesn't know how the world works or even quite know how to "adult" yet. Is it reasonable to expect someone in that position to have a detailed, effective action plan?
Focusing on this kind of regret is sort of like calling yourself a screwup because Mark Zuckerberg and Elizabeth Holmes became billionaires at a relatively young age. If they could do it, why couldn't you? Thing is, if you pay close attention to them, they're mostly lucky and/or charlatans, which, fittingly, is often the case for people who have the good fortune to be able to get married out of high school.
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And continuing on that point of life as a 15-year-old...
@mott555 said in Tinder is shit:
Due to some unfortunate aspects of my upbringing, about the only "signs" that I am good at noticing and interpreting fall along the threat/non-threat axis. If someone's acting threatening or aggressive, even a tiny bit, I can pick up on that immediately. But outside that axis, I'm terrible at reading other people and I'm wrong far more often than I'm right.
Some 15-year-olds have parents who can help guide them along during that period. Others might have parents of varying ranges of incompetence (or outright neglect/abuse), so while one group has a leg up in getting that sort of experience, the other is not getting that sort of experience, but rather gaining baggage which they may not be able to start unpacking until their 20s or 30s.
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@pie_flavor said in Tinder is shit:
Now, I rationally know that bees don't want to hurt me and wasps need to be provoked first. I rationally know that if I do get stung, the pain will last an hour and then it'll be just like a mosquito bite. I rationally know that if a wasp has its sights set on me, there's nothing I can do within a few seconds that will stop it. That does not stop me involuntarily jumping away from any small yellow-and-black flying thing, with a level of uncontrollability comparable to muscle spasms. That does not stop me from being seriously startled incredibly easy by loud bee-type buzzings to the point my heart rate skyrockets. Stuff you experience in childhood never really leaves you.
"Some things cannot be fixed, they can only be carried."
If this seems rambling that's because it is. I'd successfully thrust the entire experience out of my mind and until about fifty words into this post had no idea it was this that made me like this. I wish therapy wasn't so expensive.
How expensive is "expensive?" A $20 copay once every week or every other week in exchange for unpacking baggage and not feeling like shit is money well spent. For as screwed up as our health care system is, at least there's some semblance of a consensus that "eh, just suck it up" doesn't cut it. My only regret was that I didn't start sooner.
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@bb36e said in Tinder is shit:
until my butler finishes washing up my McLaren
Sounds miserable, given that anyone who owns an exotic has signed up for a world of hurt. Need a new part? Has to be handmade in Europe - you're dead in the water for several weeks in the meantime.
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@Groaner You miss all the shots you never take. And I never took any.
When you're batting a consistent 0.00 because you never took a chance, anything would be better than nothing. And I grew up in a culture that promotes early marriage. This is something I can't blame on anyone else or anything else. It was totally my fault--looking back there were opportunities that I flat out ignored because I had convinced myself that I wasn't worth it to anyone. That I had nothing to offer and was an automatic failure at anything interpersonal. In fact, I thought I hated people.
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@Benjamin-Hall said in Tinder is shit:
@Groaner You miss all the shots you never take. And I never took any.
What would be an acceptable number of shots to take? You can message 100 people on a dating app and still not meet the love of your life.
When you're batting a consistent 0.00 because you never took a chance, anything would be better than nothing. And I grew up in a culture that promotes early marriage. This is something I can't blame on anyone else or anything else. It was totally my fault--looking back there were opportunities that I flat out ignored because I had convinced myself that I wasn't worth it to anyone. That I had nothing to offer and was an automatic failure at anything interpersonal. In fact, I thought I hated people.
I hope that you can agree that unless you've been blessed with parents, a community at large, and a heaping dollop of good luck to point you in the right direction, the only other way to come to such a realization is through hindsight. To hold a 15-year-old to a standard that requires hindsight is, in my view, quite unfair. Many people at that age don't even know what they want to do with their lives. Some people twice their age still don't.
Heck, a 15-year-old already has a full plate of concerns that come with the age. Learning to drive? Trying to get good grades in all the courses you were taking so you'd have a good transcript for universities? SAT prep? Extracurricular activities? Overprotective parents? Where would the extra time come to take all these missed shots, and the wisdom to know when to take them?
I agree that the situation going forward is your responsibility, but I think you're a little hard on yourself. To have succeeded at your objectives in that environment, hypothetical younger you would have also had to have known the warning signs of anxiety and depression and known how to address them.
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@Groaner said in Tinder is shit:
HINT: It's never easy.
Depends. If you're female and good-looking, it's a lot easier. Yeah, yeah, I know, those women spend time on their looks, but it doesn't mean the playing field is level. Just like some people have innate talents for music or sports and get good results with low effort, while others have to work hard to achieve even passable ones.
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@Groaner said in Tinder is shit:
Sounds miserable, given that anyone who owns an exotic has signed up for a world of hurt. Need a new part? Has to be handmade in Europe - you're dead in the water for several weeks in the meantime.
You mean you only have one exotic car? Pfff. Amateur.
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@Zerosquare said in Tinder is shit:
@Groaner said in Tinder is shit:
HINT: It's never easy.
Depends. If you're female and good-looking, it's a lot easier. Yeah, yeah, I know, those women spend time on their looks, but it doesn't mean the playing field is level. Just like some people have innate talents for music or sports and get good results with low effort, while others have to work hard to achieve even passable ones.
Yep, the online dating stereotype is that men send hundreds of messages and get few responses, women get a plethora of messages just by creating an account. I remember a couple of female friends who had never tried it before and were conversing about how exciting it would be to try it, and I had to bite my tongue with respect to the horrors that lurk in the OLD world. Why spoil their ignorant bliss? At the same time, I know other ladies who go through life invisible.
I do appreciate you reiterating the point I was making about it being an unfair game. The benchmark has to be against what you can reasonably accomplish, not what other people might have accomplished.
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@Zerosquare said in Tinder is shit:
@Groaner said in Tinder is shit:
Sounds miserable, given that anyone who owns an exotic has signed up for a world of hurt. Need a new part? Has to be handmade in Europe - you're dead in the water for several weeks in the meantime.
You mean you only have one exotic car? Pfff. Amateur.
I own zero exotic cars, but I do own a modified domestic car. If I had ∞ dollars, I probably still wouldn't buy any exotics. It's much better, in my view, to buy a Hellcat, a Z06, a ZL1, a GT-R, and then head to the massive aftermarket offered to each of those vehicles for the rest of your needs.
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@topspin said in Tinder is shit:
@boomzilla My spidey sense tells me some forum member is reading this thinking “worth it!”
Read my mind.
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@pie_flavor said in Tinder is shit:
@topspin said in Tinder is shit:
@boomzilla My spidey sense tells me some forum member is reading this thinking “worth it!”
Read my mind.
Reading in progre--error token failincompreh si megration flargh success disco neck tired failjcjzutzgwnekxichthgsbs,mlocoondbdbggsh??Xnxh!
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@Tsaukpaetra said in Tinder is shit:
neck tired
Wow, you did read it. I meant 'read' in the past tense when I wrote it, though.
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@Tsaukpaetra said in Tinder is shit:
@pie_flavor said in Tinder is shit:
Read my mind.
Reading in progre--error token failincompreh si megration flargh success disco neck tired failjcjzutzgwnekxichthgsbs,mlocoondbdbggsh??Xnxh!
Sounds like the partition is corrupt. I hope you've got a backup of any critical memories, since the best approach here is to fdisk and format it…
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@dkf said in Tinder is shit:
@Tsaukpaetra said in Tinder is shit:
@pie_flavor said in Tinder is shit:
Read my mind.
Reading in progre--error token failincompreh si megration flargh success disco neck tired failjcjzutzgwnekxichthgsbs,mlocoondbdbggsh??Xnxh!
Sounds like the partition is corrupt. I hope you've got a backup of any critical memories, since the best approach here is to fdisk and format it…
The problem with this MTD is that partitions are not really a thing...
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So, I took some steps to be more proactive. First I downloaded one of those dating apps which are Tinder-like but work a bit different called Bumble where the woman has to do the first step (I guess it cuts down on the dick pics?). Well, I don't think they've got critical mass or anything but for me it was mostly crickets.
Okay, so then I went to a paid portal (though at least the initial registration plus basic features are free). And I'm now at 10 messages within hour one - the first even arrived while I was still completing my profile.
It has a bit of a "deer in headlights" effect on me.
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@Rhywden said in Tinder is shit:
And I'm now at 10 messages within hour one - the first even arrived while I was still completing my profile.
If be suspicious of bots trying to get you to spend money with results that quick
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@Rhywden Whoa, be careful with that. They’re probably running like 90% bots to inflate their user numbers and fool you into buying “premium” or whatever services.
Also, the unfortunate capitalistic side of these is that if they were anywhere as successful as they claimed, their users would (happily) quit the service.
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@Rhywden said in Tinder is shit:
First I downloaded one of those dating apps which are Tinder-like but work a bit different called Bumble where the woman has to do the first step (I guess it cuts down on the dick pics?).
Did they fix the login?
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@boomzilla said in Tinder is shit:
@Rhywden said in Tinder is shit:
First I downloaded one of those dating apps which are Tinder-like but work a bit different called Bumble where the woman has to do the first step (I guess it cuts down on the dick pics?).
Did they fix the login?
I think so, yes.
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@Jaloopa said in Tinder is shit:
@Rhywden said in Tinder is shit:
And I'm now at 10 messages within hour one - the first even arrived while I was still completing my profile.
If be suspicious of bots trying to get you to spend money with results that quick
This particular network is a local one, though, and if some of those contacts were bots they'd actually pass the Turing test. We'll see.
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@Rhywden said in Tinder is shit:
Bumble
Heard about it. I'm skeptical that it'll be much different than every other OLD offering, but hope springs eternal.
(I guess it cuts down on the dick pics?)
I would totally sign up for it if it meant I got a daily allocation of homebrew tit pics that I had a good chance of seeing firsthand.
Okay, so then I went to a paid portal (though at least the initial registration plus basic features are free). And I'm now at 10 messages within hour one - the first even arrived while I was still completing my profile.
Suspicious. One service I tried years ago would scramble the messages you got to coax you into a paid subscription. Problem is, my credit card company would decline the transaction when I tried to register, ostensibly because enough people had complained about the service being fraudulent.
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@topspin said in Tinder is shit:
Also, the unfortunate capitalistic side of these is that if they were anywhere as successful as they claimed, their users would (happily) quit the service.
That's not necessarily a bad thing. In some lines of business, both sides want the client-vendor transaction to be efficient and to-the-point. Like surgeons. Or real estate agents.
You could instead go for something like It's Just Lunch, which last I checked is about $1500 for six dates and in spite of their flowery promises, still has a long line of dissatisfied former customers.
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@Groaner Well, this one is TÜV-certified which means that someone went over their procedures. And since the TÜV has a good reputation and wants to maintain this reputation, I don't really think they'd fudge that bit.
Also, one of my friends actually met her husband over this service, so, it's not a complete fraud.
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@Rhywden said in Tinder is shit:
@Jaloopa said in Tinder is shit:
@Rhywden said in Tinder is shit:
And I'm now at 10 messages within hour one - the first even arrived while I was still completing my profile.
If be suspicious of bots trying to get you to spend money with results that quick
This particular network is a local one, though, and if some of those contacts were bots they'd actually pass the Turing test. We'll see.
HOW MANY STREET SIGNS, MOTHERFUCKER?
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@Rhywden said in Tinder is shit:
@Groaner Well, this one is TÜV-certified which means that someone went over their procedures. And since the TÜV has a good reputation and wants to maintain this reputation, I don't really think they'd fudge that bit.
Also, one of my friends actually met her husband over this service, so, it's not a complete fraud.
You have somewhat piqued my curiosity.
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@Groaner said in Tinder is shit:
@Rhywden said in Tinder is shit:
@Groaner Well, this one is TÜV-certified which means that someone went over their procedures. And since the TÜV has a good reputation and wants to maintain this reputation, I don't really think they'd fudge that bit.
Also, one of my friends actually met her husband over this service, so, it's not a complete fraud.
You have somewhat piqued my curiosity.
Sorry, as I said, she's taken.
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@Groaner said in Tinder is shit:
@Rhywden said in Tinder is shit:
@Jaloopa said in Tinder is shit:
@Rhywden said in Tinder is shit:
And I'm now at 10 messages within hour one - the first even arrived while I was still completing my profile.
If be suspicious of bots trying to get you to spend money with results that quick
This particular network is a local one, though, and if some of those contacts were bots they'd actually pass the Turing test. We'll see.
HOW MANY STREET SIGNS, MOTHERFUCKER?
The worst thing about these is that the correct answer depends on what the other people have answered. Even if they were wrong. reCAPTCHA has become a Massive Multiplayer Online Family Feud.
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Speaking of Turing tests - this quote sounds like random words spat out of a dictionary by a particularly bad chatbot.
@Groaner said in Tinder is shit:
but hope springs eternal
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@Groaner said in Tinder is shit:
You could instead go for something like It's Just Lunch, which last I checked is about $1500 for six dates and in spite of their flowery promises, still has a long line of dissatisfied former customers.
@Rhywden said in Tinder is shit:
this one is TÜV-certified which means that someone went over their procedures.
Well, they probably certified that the company indeed delivers lunches. If the clients expected more than that, they should have read the name of the service they were subscribing to
Seriously, tough. Certifications don't mean anything if you don't know what the scope and the criteria were. I got to experience before-and-after ISO9001 certification in a company I used to work for. It did nothing to solve quality problems. It only brought overpaid consultants, terrible Powerpoint presentations (I mean "bright red text on blue background"-bad), and tons of paperwork that had the effect of diluting the blame when things got wrong.
EDIT: forgot about one thing. The final certification audit had remarks on basically every group, except one: top management. Not because top management was perfect (far from it); it's just that you don't want to piss off the people who are paying for the audit, right?
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@Zerosquare said in Tinder is shit:
diluting the blame when things got wrong.
Sounds like it worked well for people in charge.
