Maybe they want to hire Tanenbaum or Torvalds?



  • Small business in the field of selling telephony and intercom hardware wants to hire IT drone. The words "Auxiliar De Informática" means a low level and propably underpaid position.

    The requirements, on the other hand... Well...



    See for yourselves: http://www.infojobs.com.br/DetailVacancy.aspx?vc=2802612&xtor=EPR-1064



    PS: There are currently more than 50 candidates for the position.



    Edit: translated the last requirement for more fun and pleasure: "Other software: email servers, Selenium, SAP, Accounting Software, Web servers, Proxy servers, Sound editing, CRM, AutoCAD, Microsoft Project, ERP, Video editing"



  • Dang it, if I had better CorelDraw skills I could apply.

    Since you know the lay of the land: is that office near The River? Could be convenient to learn how to walk on water or start fires in my bare hands during lunch time.



  • @atipico said:

    The words "Auxiliar De Informática" means a low level and propably underpaid position.
    Unless it was supposed to read [i]Axila De Informática[/i], in which case it's really low level.



  • @da Doctah said:

    Unless it was supposed to read Axila De Informática, in which case it's really low level.

    Man, that joke stinks. babum pssssss



  •  At least, they are satisfied with people that completed high school. They don't even require an undergraduation in IT.

    By the way, who capitalizes prepositions?


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @atipico said:

    ...propably underpaid position.
    At least you get luncheon vouchers and a free bus pass, if my reading of the additional benefits is correct...



  •  I'm not familiar with the C+ language.  I guess that disqualifies me?



  • @Speakerphone Dude said:

    Could be convenient to learn how to walk on water or start fires in my bare hands during lunch time.

    They don't want nothing extraordinary. Just someone who is skilled as a DBA, backend and frontend developer, graphical designer, system admin, sound editor, video editor, amongst other stuff. While mastering various tools in each of those fields. And probably while paying around $750 for the position.



    I'm inclined to send a fake resumé just for fun.



  • @PJH said:

    At least you get luncheon vouchers and a free bus pass, if my reading of the additional benefits is correct...

    Any job here will give you that, unless you are a chilean immigrant sewing clothes on a basement for the mafia. I think it's required by law or something.



  • @atipico said:

    @PJH said:
    At least you get luncheon vouchers and a free bus pass, if my reading of the additional benefits is correct...

    Any job here will give you that, unless you are a chilean immigrant sewing clothes on a basement for the mafia. I think it's required by law or something.

     

    Yep, that is required by law.



  • @atipico said:

    @Speakerphone Dude said:
    Could be convenient to learn how to walk on water or start fires in my bare hands during lunch time.

    They don't want nothing extraordinary. Just someone who is skilled as a DBA, backend and frontend developer, graphical designer, system admin, sound editor, video editor, amongst other stuff. While mastering various tools in each of those fields. And probably while paying around $750 for the position.



    I'm inclined to send a fake resumé just for fun.

    $750 per day is pretty good. Depending on the schedule, the paid or unpaid breaks, etc., it comes close to $100/hr. After rent and utilities, that leaves enough money to buy a DVD player and watch The River to get the joke in my comment.



  • @Speakerphone Dude said:

    $750 per day is pretty good.

    PER DAY?!?!?!?!?



    C'mon man, that's fucking THIRD WORLD we're talking about.

    I mean $750 per month.



    Edit: to be "fair", the description of the position asks for the regular dude who just fixes computers, usually by formatting then and reinstalling XP and that's it. Probably RH just copypasted the rest from who knows where for who know what reason.



  • Hey, they want second grade high schoolers. I think we all know one of those...



  • @Mcoder said:

    By the way, who capitalizes prepositions?

    Eddie Van Halen?



  • @PJH said:

    At least you get luncheon vouchers

    I LOL'd when google translated that bit as "Food Stamps," which in the US is a form of welfare nominally for providing food for families, but which is increasingly supporting the malt liquor and exotic dancing industries.



  • JavaOS

    What a stupid job description and I don't know how people apply to this. In Spain you can find some like this too.



  • @atipico said:

    C'mon man, that's fucking THIRD WORLD we're talking about.

    I mean $750 per month.

    US dollars? Whoa, there are third worlds, and there are hellholes, like where I live where base salaries are way lower than that



  • Maybe he's an escaped North Korean who now lives in the Philippines?



  • A friend of mine responded to a similar ad a few years ago. He was between jobs so the low wages weren't a priority. The place was a small print shop or something similar that really needed an "IT Guy" (someone to parse some data once in a while, write some VBA, help the users with their spreadsheets, and keep the server running). The pay was lousy, but not out of line for what the job really entailed. He didn't end up taking the job (perhaps using the phrase "you don't need someone with my skills, you just need a code monkey" in an interview isn't the best strategy).

    Oddly enough, I see their posting crop up about 2-3 times per year ever since then. Probably alternating between hiring wet behind the ears kids with a bunch of Cisco certifications and overqualified admins in transition from one job to another, either case losing them to better jobs in short order.

     



  • @serguey123 said:

    @atipico said:
    I mean $750 per month.

    US dollars? Whoa, there are third worlds, and there are hellholes, like where I live where base salaries are way lower than that

    Well, actually I pulled that value from my ass made a VERY VERY VERY ROUGH estimate conversion based on the sole fact that when CDs were still used to buy music an U$ 30 dollars music CD would cost approximately R$ 30 reais, so while the Brazilian Real is valued now a little less than half a dollar, the price of products would be lower in dollars. Of course there are products who are ten times more expensive here in Brazil, some others are way cheaper. There are better ways to calculate and convert the purchasing power (is that term correct? damn Google Translator) of consumers from different countries vs. the minimum wage. I'm just too lazy to google for it and test to see if they make more sense.



    TL;DR version: not 750 US Dollars, it's 750 Brazilian Reals, but things here are cheaper.



  • @atipico said:

    not 750 US Dollars, it's 750 Brazilian Reals,

    Ohh, again, saner that my country, we decided one currency was too easy so we have two, one valued lower than the US dollar and the other valued higher, I long ago decided that this country is a social experiment to see how far you have to push people before they snap and start a murderous rampage.
    @atipico said:
    things here are cheaper

    Some things are cheaper but others are crazy expensive, nevertherless I would say that the average cost of living is higher than some first world countries (the real irony is the proposed solution for our problems..)



  • @atipico said:

    Of course there are products who are ten times more expensive here in Brazil, some others are way cheaper. There are better ways to calculate and convert the purchasing power (is that term correct? damn Google Translator) of consumers from different countries vs. the minimum wage.
     

    As I understand it, the cost of housing in city area of the USA is off the charts compared to here, but on the other hand it's very cheap to own a car (total cost of ownership, I mean), with the reverse being true here in Dutchland.

     

    Basically the reason I don't have a car is money, plus all the extra bullshit of car ownership.



  • AH!! You ARE Cuban!!!



  • @serguey123 said:

    we decided one currency was too easy so we have two
     

    Oh sweet. Now I just need to take my shortlist of possible countries and check out their currencies.



  • @dhromed said:

    @serguey123 said:

    we decided one currency was too easy so we have two
     

    Oh sweet. Now I just need to take my shortlist of possible countries and check out their currencies.


    I think there is only one country that does this.



  • @Xyro said:

    AH!! You ARE Cuban!!!
    Ahh, so it was YOU who indexed "countries with two currencies"...



  • @Xyro said:

    AH!! You ARE Cuban!!!

    Isn't Cuba's "other" currency pegged at 1 USD, though? He said one currency was lower than USD and one higher.



  • @Mcoder said:

     At least, they are satisfied with people that completed high school. They don't even require an undergraduation in IT.

    Not high-school. The hows-it-called 3 year period after highschool and before university?
    Here we have elementary school, then high school, those are supposed to be the same for everyone.
    Then a 3-year period after high school, and then university (*)

    (*) Some people can choose to replace that 3-year period with another similar period ("technical school") where you learn one practical specialization and then don't go to university and get worse jobs.

    @Mcoder said:

    By the way, who capitalizes prepositions?

    It was my keydoarb, it is borken. I sware.



  • @Xyro said:

    AH!! You ARE Cuban!!!

    If I recall correctly from what I saw on the news channel, the intenet access prices in Cuba are around 1 month of the average worker's salary equals a few hours of use of the few cybercafes in luxury hotels where people can access the internet, there are no ISPs in the country, bloggers (all the 3 or so in the country) are chased by the government, etc.



  • Then I have no idea then. China..?



  • @atipico said:

    the intenet access prices in Cuba are around 1 month of the average worker's salary equals a few hours of use of the few cybercafes in luxury hotels where people can access the internet

    True, but there are a couple of more way to access it free (work or school) and there is also the black market
    @atipico said:
    there are no ISPs in the country

    Except for the phone company which is happy to sell you an account at a retarded prize (granted this is easier if you are a foreigner).
    @atipico said:
    bloggers (all the 3 or so in the country) are chased by the government,

    Probably true, unless you are government approved
    @Someone You Know said:
    Isn't Cuba's "other" currency pegged at 1 USD, though?
    No, it is a bit lower, 1 CUC-->0.93 USD or something like that which is again retarded (and this is if you are a financial entity, if you are an individual is like 1 CUC-->0.80 USD because we like to fuck ourselves so people tend to use the blackmarket isnstead)



  • @Xyro said:

    Then I have no idea then. China..?

    Because I like you,
    here is a list of circulating currencies and matching countries. There is only one country in the whole world that issues two currencies, other countries do accept foreign currencies (mostly colonies or ex-colonies) and some print or mint commemorative money which is not used in a day to day basis



  • How does Abkhazia have a currency of rubles and "None"??



  • @Xyro said:

    How does Abkhazia have a currency of rubles and "None"??
     

    Who even knows.



  • @Xyro said:

    How does Abkhazia have a currency of rubles and "None"??

    None is a granite wheel 13' in diameter. One None is worth 120 rubles.



  • @Xyro said:

    How does Abkhazia have a currency of rubles and "None"??
     

    Because it's way too hard to make change in "FILE NOT FOUND"



  • @Xyro said:

    How does Abkhazia have a currency of rubles and "None"??

    Because they kind of have another coin but is not used that much, there are only a few denomination and only in mint so None is not a total misnomer as Abkhazia is kind of a country (only a few nations recognize it as such) as is regarded by the rest of the world as part of Georgia.



  • @ShatteredArm said:

     I'm not familiar with the C+ language.  I guess that disqualifies me?

    You probably wouldn't like it. It's barely above average.



  •  @serguey123 said:

    @atipico said:
    C'mon man, that's fucking THIRD WORLD we're talking about.

    I mean $750 per month.

    US dollars? Whoa, there are third worlds, and there are hellholes, like where I live where base salaries are way lower than that

    Oh come on. Соцблок (how the fuck is this in english?) countries aren't pinnacles of western civilisation, but there are worse places -- like the Australian outback. Unless you live in Kamchatka or something.


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @Mo6eB said:

    Соцблок (how the fuck is this in english?) countries
    We used to say Communist Bloc, but that doesn't seem correct any more.



  • @Mo6eB said:

    there are worse places

    Yes, of course there are. I think every human believe this, is how we cope.

    @Mo6eB said:

    like the Australian outback. Unless you live in Kamchatka or something.

    I'm talking about countries in general, not about suckies places to live, you know were else it would suck to live? In the middle of the fucking desert or under the earth with the mole people (they never return what they burrow).

    So if you are comparing Australia as a whole with a third world country and believe it to be worse than Candyland, you are welcome to stay until proven wrong. Look I love my country but I'm not blind to their numerous retarded failings



  • @Mo6eB said:

    Соцблок (how the fuck is this in english?)

    The Second World?



  • Back around 1996 I cut a want ad out of one of the magazines - InfoWorld or PC Week - and kept it for years for the humor value. It went something like this:

    "Programmer wanted: 10 years experience with MVS and COBOL. PC application programming in BASIC and C++. Must have CNE or MCSE. Support Banyan Vines and Novell network. Support end users running SMART Office Environment and Word Perfect. Must have fluent technical Japanese. 3 to 5 months per year at our site in Hiroshima, Japan, rest of year at our main offices in Fargo, North Dakota. Relocation expenses will NOT be compensated. Renumeration up to $29,500 per year. Send resume to..."

    Ri-ight... Even allowing for inflation, that salary was just as laughable in 1996...


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