Florida Man goes to...
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@boomzilla I don't know, but I suspect he was more likely on a mission from meth.
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@boomzilla "Baby clothes!"
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@Watson Doo-doo-doodoo-doodoo....
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@boomzilla Don't look like no expressway to me.
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@Zecc said in Florida Man goes to...:
@Watson Doo-doo-doodoo-doodoo....
Me about an hour ago: okay, I’m going to look up “baby shark” and see — well, hear — what all the fuss is about.
Me a few minutes later: What, this is it? That’s all it is? Well okay, I’ll stop it now just in case.
Me, some minutes after that: oh goddammit.
Me now: Can’t remember the tune any more! Had a feeling that would happen.
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@kazitor said in Florida Man goes to...:
Me now: Can’t remember the tune any more!
BA-BY SHARK DO DO DO DO DO DO....
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@kazitor Although I still have the occasional earworm I can't get rid of, I have accumulated enough different earworms over the years that I can usually switch to a new one as the previous one gets tiresome.
Of course, most earworms disappear by themselves in a dayyyy or twooooooooooo...
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... toss their Thanksgiving turkey into the tub to thaw:
Granted, they're at least somewhat careful:
O'Donnell said the turkey's packaging was closely examined for leaks before the thawing process to make sure none of the chlorinated water seeped into the meat. He said the turkey will be removed after spending a day thawing in pool.
O'Donnell said his family has been thawing the Thanksgiving turkey in the pool for 18 years.
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@JBert said in Florida Man goes to...:
O'Donnell said his family has been thawing the Thanksgiving turkey in the pool for 18 years.
Maybe they should try something else, it should've thawed out by now
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@boomzilla said in Florida Man goes to...:
Site seems to be unavailable for Europeans, so here's a copy of that video on Twitter:
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@boomzilla College student + alcohol + Florida. Any 2 of the 3 are bad enough, but all 3 together, I'm surprised it wasn't even stupider than pinching nipples.
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@boomzilla King Kong ain't got sh-
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...the cemetary!
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Florida burglar goes to the morgue:
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Family and friends question the sheriff’s office account of Hernandez’ death.
But of course they would...
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...the laundromat (where he was wary of encountering other Florida men):
Kleiss reportedly told police that he carried the AR-15 for “self defense” because he “has seen crazy stuff since moving to Florida.”
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... Portland?
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... recover his golf ball.
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... discover a "mysterious monolith" at their pub.
The business said security camera footage failed to record the structure's installation.
Nope. Nobody who could have tampered with the camera knows how the monolith got there...
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Hobbits go to Florida:
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Florida Man's lawyer goes to jail!
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@izzion said in Florida Man goes to...:
Florida Man's lawyer goes to jail!
The best line:
Did that dude say "I don't have a mental illness. I'm from Florida"??
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pwnt
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@LaoC Ah yes, Florida Man goes golfing.
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@dcon It wouldn't be a Florida Man story without the commentary:
"At one point he even rolled over like he wanted us to rub his belly," Almond said of the shark.
Almond said that, despite the minor damage to her boat, she is grateful for the encounter.
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@Tsaukpaetra said in Florida Man goes to...:
How did they know it was male?
He was interested by the motor of the boat, and wanted them to touch him
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... the Super Bowl!
https://www.wfla.com/news/florida/super-bowl-streaker-identified-as-31-year-old-florida-man/
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The black power fist is an interesting choice considering the guy's mugshot:
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@boomzilla said in Florida Man goes to...:
The black power fist is an interesting choice considering the guy's mugshot:
He looks very punchable.
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...a Walmart parking lot!
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FEBRUARY 22--In what may be the worst explanation for driving 50 mph over the posted limit, a 21-year-old motorist told cops that he was speeding on a Florida highway because he was “listening to a song named Ciento Veinte, which means 120, so I was driving 120.”
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When Ortecho finally pulled over, he said, “I’m sorry, I didn’t know driving reckless was illegal,” cops report.