The unofficial offical bad pun of the day thread
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@Gern_Blaanston said in The unofficial offical bad pun of the day thread:
I made Wookie steak for dinner last night. It was a little chewy.
Little known fact: Ewok tastes like chicken.
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If you made an device out of a traditional round-bottomed cast iron Chinese frying pan, would you call it an eWok?
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It takes 5 minutes to walk from my house to the bar.
But it takes 45 minutes to walk back home.
The difference is staggering.
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Darth Vader was engaged to a woman named Ella but she called off the wedding.
She didn't want to be named Ella Vader.
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@Gern_Blaanston When Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie had their first child by the conventional method (after having already adopted others), they named her Shiloh.
Shiloh Pitt.
Apparently nobody ever told them about spoonerisms.
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@Gern_Blaanston Did she have plans about going up in the world, or what?
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@Arantor It was when Darth started humming Aerosmith tunes that she knew she had to bail.
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@Mason_Wheeler In case anyone else was wondering if this was actually happening:
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@jinpa said in The unofficial offical bad pun of the day thread:
@Mason_Wheeler In case anyone else was wondering if this was actually happening:
"Turophile" does not mean "loves to eat Turing machines"!
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Doctors who do circumcisions don't make a lot of money.
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They only get tips.
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Justice is best served cold.
Because if it was served warm it'd be justwater.
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@JBert Much better than, "Never go to the capital of The Netherlands. That's where all those dam 'amsters are."
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@jinpa Back when it was a thing, someone told me about the Hamsterdance website.
I told him it was actually "Hampsterdance".
He said, "No, there's no P in Hamster".
I suggested that maybe he just wasn't squeezing them hard enough.
(For the record, back in the day, both spellings were used for the website; now, neither site exists.)
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@da-Doctah said in The unofficial offical bad pun of the day thread:
squeezing them hard enough
šµ
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@da-Doctah said in The unofficial offical bad pun of the day thread:
(For the record, back in the day, both spellings were used for the website; now, neither site exists.)
Wayback Machine has you covered.
The song still exists too!
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@loopback0 said in The unofficial offical bad pun of the day thread:
@da-Doctah said in The unofficial offical bad pun of the day thread:
(For the record, back in the day, both spellings were used for the website; now, neither site exists.)
Wayback Machine has you covered.
The song still exists too!
Not at all surprised. The song is actually a speeded-up versikn of "Whistle Stop", written and performed by Roger Miller for the Disney animated film Robin Hood & Maid Marian".
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There are a lot of farms in the area who raise chickens. I started transporting them to the markets and food processing plants.
I call my business "Poultry In Motion".
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@Gern_Blaanston I've seen that particular pun used as an answer to why the chicken crossed the road.
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@Zecc said in The unofficial offical bad pun of the day thread:
@Gern_Blaanston I've seen that particular pun used as an answer to why the chicken crossed the road.
Please don't egg on this kind of "humo(u)r"
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@Gern_Blaanston Call it "poultry in motion" all you like, to me it's just chicks on speed
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@ixvedeusi "When I first moved to Arizona, I thought a roadrunner was just a fast streetwalker." -- Steve Allen
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@boomzilla Hmm. Riker's Beard, though appearing to be on Riker's face, where it should be, was temporarily inhabiting Picard. Sounds like another formula episode.
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@jinpa remember, you can commit virtually any crime in Star Trek, as long as you were possessed by an Alien while doing it. Same for Rikerās Beard really.
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What's orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot.
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Whenever I try to make a chemistry joke
I never get a reaction.
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I ate at a restaurant and the food gave me diarrhea.
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I'm filing an anti-defecation lawsuit.
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What kind of doctor is Dr. Pepper?
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A Fizzician.
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@boomzilla Wonder how complicated it was to produce this pic.
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Stallone: Iām making a movie about composers. Iām playing Beethoven.
Van Damme: Iāll be Mozart.
Arnold: Iāll beā¦ no, screw you guys Iām not saying it.
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@Arantor said in The unofficial offical bad pun of the day thread:
Stallone: Iām making a movie about composers. Iām playing Beethoven.
Van Damme: Iāll be Mozart.
Arnold: Iāll beā¦ no, screw you guys Iām not saying it.He should have called shotgun on Mozart. Fellow Austrian and all.
Let JCVD play one of his own countrymen. They could have him perform a Franck sonata.
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@da-Doctah said in The unofficial offical bad pun of the day thread:
They could have him perform a Franck sonata.
And much more, he can do it his way.
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@da-Doctah said in The unofficial offical bad pun of the day thread:
@Arantor said in The unofficial offical bad pun of the day thread:
Stallone: Iām making a movie about composers. Iām playing Beethoven.
Van Damme: Iāll be Mozart.
Arnold: Iāll beā¦ no, screw you guys Iām not saying it.He should have called shotgun on Mozart. Fellow Austrian and all.
Right.
I'll be Mozart
Makes perfect sense.
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@boomzilla purport Ā· to push through a cat-flap.
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What did the seal say after losing an electron?
"I'm just curious if you have any sources to back up your opinion?"
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@ixvedeusi ... and it only stopped after joining the union.
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@ixvedeusi Not "guilty as charged"? I am disappointed.
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@dkf said in The unofficial offical bad pun of the day thread:
@ixvedeusi Not "guilty as charged"?
Negative, sir!
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I met a German fellow who's very picky about what he eats
His name is Dieter.