The bad jokes topic π΄πΉπ¨
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Sex is extremely difficult when you're disabled[spoiler] by pepper spray and a kick in the nuts.[/spoiler]
I'm starting to get self-conscious about my body odour. On my last two dates, the woman has sprayed me with perfume before we had sex.
[spoiler]Not sure of the brand but it had a distinct sharp, peppery smell.[/spoiler]
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Two scientists walk into a bar, and decide to have a drinking contest.
The first walks up to the barmaid and says, "I'll have a glass of H2O, please."
The second scientist says, "I'll have a glass of H2O, too."
Needless to say, the first scientist won.
[spoiler]Two more scientists walk into the same bar.
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The first says, "I'll have some H2O."
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The second says, "I'll have a glass of water too. Why did you say H2O? It's the end of the day and there's no need to talk about work."
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The first scientist stares at his drink, angry that his assassination plan has failed.[/spoiler]
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An atom says to another: "I think I've lost an electron!"
The other replies: "Are you sure?"
The first: [spoiler]"I'm positive!"[/spoiler]
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IIRC pure HβO is also poisonous?
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IIRC pure HβO is also poisonous?
Actually, it is one of the most dangerous chemicals on our planet!
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That's right. I knew some guy who drank distilled water once, he dropped dead right after the first sip.
That's why I only drink Soylent.
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IIRC pure HβO is also poisonous?
Apparently. DHMO bollocks notwithstanding:
Summary: osmosis means your cells take up the pure water to try to account for the imbalance of tonicity either side of the cell membrane ('normal' water has impurities which means the transfer doesn't happen (as much)).
Then burst!!!eleventyone.
See figure one:
https://s3.amazonaws.com/test.classconnection/794/flashcards/406794/png/tonicity.png
Or at a minimum dilute the electrolytes in your system.
That said simply drinking enough (unpurified) water can create the electrolyte imbalance.
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If an ossuary is full of bones, what is a seminary full of?
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Very uncomfortable feminists.
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I knew some guy who drank distilled water once, he dropped dead right after the first sip.
That was because homeopathy. The more you dilute a medicine, thus the less of it there is, the more effective it is. Taking distilled water by accident is a sure way to OD.
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That's bushwah. The WHO did an actual stuy on this and found that the problems with pure water come from the lack of minerals. And not because of any bursting cells.
http://www.who.int/water_sanitation_health/dwq/nutrientschap12.pdf
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@PleegWat said:
IIRC pure HβO is also poisonous?
Apparently. DHMO bollocks notwithstanding:
Summary: osmosis means your cells take up the pure water to try to account for the imbalance of tonicity either side of the cell membrane ('normal' water has impurities which means the transfer doesn't happen (as much)).
Then burst!!!eleventyone.
See figure one:
https://s3.amazonaws.com/test.classconnection/794/flashcards/406794/png/tonicity.png
Or at a minimum dilute the electrolytes in your system.
That said simply drinking enough (unpurified) water can create the electrolyte imbalance.
You'd have to drink a lot of pure H2O before that became a problem. And even then, you'd suffer the same problems from drinking too much standard tap water.
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Discourse
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This was in the Clacebert's Gazette ~ 1968:
What do you get when you cross an unwashed dog and cat with another unwashed dog and cat?
Dat dirty double crosser.
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Final exam in Logic 101 course consists of one question:
(1) Complete the syllogism:
"Knowledge is power." --Francis Bacon
"Power corrupts." --Lord ActonOr as my abnormal psych professor said:
Love is blind.
God is love.
Stevie Wonder is blind.
Therefore:
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Or as my abnormal psych professor said:
Love is blind.
God is love.
Stevie Wonder is blind.
Therefore:God is superstition?
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Well, yes, God (or to me, Goddess) is. That doesn't make Him (Her) any less important. Maybe more important, actually.
Spirituality is self-exploration, not something related to the physical world. It is the branch of psychology that deals with the ways of approaching those parts of the self that aren't amenable to rational discourse. We only run into problems when we try to apply what we understand about it to others, or to the physical world.
HEAHD.
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Well, yes, God (or to me, Goddess) is. That doesn't make Him (Her) any less important. Maybe more important, actually.
Spirituality is self-exploration, not something related to the physical world. It is the branch of psychology that deals with the ways of approaching those parts of the self that aren't amenable to rational discourse. We only run into problems when we try to apply what we understand about it to others, or to the physical world.
HEAHD.
I was just going for a Stevie Wonder joke
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43 posts were forcibly gerrymandered to a new topic: You spell potatoe, I say tomatay, or: politicians and liars; is the former a strict superset of the latter? Discuss.
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Wow until I checked the date, I was thinking: "what a tasteless motherfucker".
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Joke fail. Hz has no particular connection to the electromagnetic spectrum, it just means something's periodic. You could probably construct a better joke relating it to sound.
Also, https://xkcd.com/594/.
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bad joke: Discourse fucking with me and insisting I'm several hundred posts behind.
The scary thought is that there are people who read all of the posts on WTDWTF.
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Have any of you heard of the pirate named "the Fruum?" F-r-u-u-m: it's an odd-looking, odd-sounding name, like vacuum.
John Frum is a living joke.
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I'm not sure I get the joke...
[spoiler]Are you making some underhanded reference to Fruit of the loom for their underwear (it took a lucky Google query to find it)? Can't say I've ever heard of that brand, as I'm not an American.[/spoiler]
I thought you called them "Y-fronts".
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There were two little girls sitting on the roof, one of them good and the other evil. Both were throwing bricks onto passers-by.
The evil girl hit 3 people, but the good one β 5.
[spoiler]Because good always wins over evil.[/spoiler]
?
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I don't know, maybe it cannot be translated well in English.
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It works fine in english. Well the point works, but it works better as a joke without the spoilered add on.
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without the spoilered add on
That's the punchline. How does the joke work without it?
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It works differently, but better IMO. You are using "good" as in level of skill, not moral standing which is unexpected due to contrast with "evil". Basically it's playing on language usage for the word rather than relying on Good over Evil.
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I don't know, maybe it cannot be translated well in English.
I was reading that as -(minus) 5. Was this incorrect?
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Yes, it's incorrect. - (minus) is not the same as β (n-dash).
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Yes, it's incorrect. - (minus) is not the same as β (n-dash).
I bet you hide O's and l's in strings of digits.
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0f course 1 do.
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Using a hyphen to indicate a pause is pretty common, and jokes often have timing being an important part. I don't see how you read it the way you did, but at least it explains the confusion you expressed.
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Using a hyphen to indicate a pause is pretty common, and jokes often have timing being an important part. I don't see how you read it the way you did, but at least it explains the confusion you expressed.
Yes, I can see why it's incomprehensible to you that someone seeing a hyphen before a digit might interpret it as negative.
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It's not a hyphen and it has a space between the dash and the number.
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It's not a hyphen and it has a space between the dash and the number.
It serves me right for not putting everything I read through a parser to make sure that the characters are what the context implies.
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Negatives are normally " -5 " not " - 5 ". The extra space is important.
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The scary thought is that there are people who read all of the posts on WTDWTF.
If you don't, Boomzilla gets mad at you because you somehow didn't telepathically know that the topic was changed.
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I wonder if you argue with your compiler the same way.
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you somehow didn't telepathically know that the topic was changed
Reading the conversation isn't telepathy.
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If you don't, Boomzilla gets mad at you because you somehow didn't telepathically know that the topic was changed.Reading is hard. Let's go shopping!<blah
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So two cancers were walking the the street. Both of them were unemployed. Suddenly, one of them says, ...
"Let's get Jobs!"
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does anyone else think this game is overrated
[spoiler][/spoiler]
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Yes, it's incorrect. - (minus) is not the same as β (n-dash).
It's easily confused, though, and should be used with care in front of a digit number. Suggestions:
The evil girl hit three people, but the good one β five.
or modified
The evil girl hit 3 people, but the good one β she hit 5.