The Official Funny Stuff Thread™
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@Tsaukpaetra well, given the "...Mosaic and Ghopher have made the internet much easier to use", plus the AOL reference, I would guess this was from 1992 or near, pre win 3
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@Tsaukpaetra said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Boggles even DOS experts?
Networking in DOS was… not for the faint-hearted. Firstly, you always needed a third-party library to actually do the communication, and nothing was really all that standardised. Secondly, you were in an environment where multitasking was basically foreign concept, and deeply hacky where done. When combined with the fact that the processor was in Real Mode, it's a wonder that anyone managed to get anything done at all.
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maybe this should be in the off-color jokes thread....
translation: "so, you're eighteen now?"
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@dkf said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Networking in DOS was… not for the faint-hearted.
I spent quite a long time working for a firm that made classroom networking equipment for Apple II, Mac and DOS machines. Our server was a block server, not a file server; essentially a networked floppy disk emulator.
The DOS version worked by hooking the BIOS Int 13h disk device calls.
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@flabdablet said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
The DOS version worked by hooking the BIOS Int 13h disk device calls.
Which still mostly worked! Up until UEFI, and even then compatibility layers still mostly let that still work semi-ok.
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@DogsB Fortunately, going down the motorway to the next junction doesn't count as either inside or outside.
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Oh hey, the Perry Bible Fellowship guy woke up again.
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@Zecc Heh heh, boobs.
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Chester Stranczek was, of course, a Republican.
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@DogsB Maybe they know something we don't...
edit: Hmmm. I seem to a word there...
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Some other posters' Dysfunctional Family Circus captions, because they have to be funnier than the ones I came up with that I posted in the Bad Jokes thread.
http://dfc.furr.org/archive/3.html
http://dfc.furr.org/archive/image.php?image=3.gif
"OK, now Simon Sez: run to the neighbors yelling 'No, daddy, no!'"http://dfc.furr.org/archive/5.html
http://dfc.furr.org/archive/image.php?image=5.gif
Uh, Bil, they found our stash again.http://dfc.furr.org/archive/12.html
http://dfc.furr.org/archive/image.php?image=12.gif
DADDY!!! HELP ME!!! THE DOTTED LINE THAT'S BEEN STALKING JEFFY IS ATTACKING ME!!!http://dfc.furr.org/archive/15.html
http://dfc.furr.org/archive/image.php?image=15.gif
"Hare Krishna...Hare Hare Krishna!!!!"http://dfc.furr.org/archive/19.html
http://dfc.furr.org/archive/image.php?image=19.gif
Hey Dolly, you've been rubbing your legs together again, I bet. You have that dreamy look on your face.http://dfc.furr.org/archive/71.html
http://dfc.furr.org/archive/image.php?image=71.gif
...Then they slapped this toddler mask on me and gave me this bag of candy. So I just burned their souls. I decided to keep the mask & candy, though.http://dfc.furr.org/archive/100.html
http://dfc.furr.org/archive/image.php?image=100.gif
Oh, great Sun god...I will pledge to offer up to you the child growing in my womb as your newest disciple...if you promise to grant me a pair of size D hooters and the painful death of that Calvin fuckhead who told me that he was impotent.
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@flabdablet said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Chester Stranczek was, of course, a Republican.
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@flabdablet said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Chester Stranczek was, of course, a Republican.
A Reublican, you mean…
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@ben_lubar said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@flabdablet said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Chester Stranczek was, of course, a Republican.
Stranczek covered up the toxicity of the city's water supply for a hell of a long time. Might well be that "no excretions" is just a polite way of saying he doesn't give a shit.
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http://dfc.furr.org/archive/365.html
http://dfc.furr.org/archive/image.php?image=365.gif
Sicily, June 8, 1909. Young Luca Brazzi suddenly experiences a terrifying, albeit cryptic, premonition of his future.
Give a Keane a fish, and he'll eat for a day. Teach a Keane to fish, and you'll be breaking a half dozen sex crime laws.
His mind wandering to the upcoming Renfair season, Jeffy was determined to have the biggest codpiece in town.
"It was in his later 'yellow' period that Keane abondoned finger pointing realism for the realm of allegory. In Fishing (fig 3) the juxtaposition of Jeffy stradling the giant fish represents our cultu... I mean man's need to... oh, I can't do this. Screw it! It doesn't represent anything except that Keane was one sick and twisted old pedophile and that the fucker should have been put to sleep in the fifties!" -- from Bil Keane, A Critical Retrospective by Prof. William Keane Jr.
Jeffy eventually made a fortune coming up with topics for Jerry Springer.
"Gonna need a big fish," thought Jeffy. "That's the only food left I can pronounce."
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@anotherusername yeah, but, to be fair, how many people own a giant fish action figure?
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@Onyx said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@anotherusername yeah, but, to be fair, how many people own a giant fish action figure?
I do. For the carpool lane.
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German politics.
Translation:
Frauke Petry (from the AfD party, quite right-wing) and Sahra Wagenknecht (from Die Linke party, very left-leaning) discovered many similarities in a recent interview.
If only there was a word describing the cooperation of nationalists and socialists.
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@Rhywden said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
German politics.
Heh...when I looked at the first line, I saw: "IN EMINEM INTERVIEW" and wondered why he wasn't in the picture.
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@boomzilla said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Heh...when I looked at the first line, I saw: "IN EMINEM INTERVIEW" and wondered why he wasn't in the picture.
Me too!
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@abarker said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@boomzilla said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Heh...when I looked at the first line, I saw: "IN EMINEM INTERVIEW" and wondered why he wasn't in the picture.
Me too!
I recognized "einem", but it took me a while to determine that it wasn't Iengvich.
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@anotherusername said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Iengvich = Like Engrish, but German (yeah, I made it up) ... uh, shit, don't google that at work; a bunch of the google results for it look like porn...
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@Tsaukpaetra said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@DogsB said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Something seems wrong with your zeros.
They're 1s. They added the line to the top so 9:11 doesn't remind people of twin towers.
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@anotherusername said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@Tsaukpaetra said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@DogsB said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Something seems wrong with your zeros.
They're 1s. They added the line to the top so 9:11 doesn't remind people of twin towers.
That's about as useful as skipping floor 13 because superstition.
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@Karla said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@anotherusername said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@Tsaukpaetra said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
@DogsB said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
Something seems wrong with your zeros.
They're 1s. They added the line to the top so 9:11 doesn't remind people of twin towers.
That's about as useful as skipping floor 13 because superstition.
Yeah, or as using for 7, to disambiguate it from 1...
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Soylent bombs are People!
(My grandfather gave me a copy of this book, with this cover, when I was ten or so, along with a copy of The Best of Cordwainer Smith; he was a huge fan of Smith, and I came to appreciate his unique work. The cover is a reference to the story "When the People Fell", about the conquest of Venus by China - the last Terrestrial nation to survive the multiple nuclear wars that proceeded the rise of the Instrumentality, and the only one not entirely under the IoM control until they chose to be resettled on Venus - a world the IoM had discarded as useless due to its native wildlife. The solution? Airdrop the whole populace at in waves, with the first wave sent to round up the 'loudies' - balloon-like creatures that were harmless nuisances unless injured, but which would explode in a burst of radiation if killed violently - by forming human chains around them to corral them, then holding them there by hand until they starved. Smith's point was meant as a warning that a country wit large populations and little regard for individual lives will often accept huge losses to accomplish what cannot be done through technology and Yankee ingenuity.)
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@truestorybro **
**Okay, so not really funny...but not sure where else to put.
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Speaking of vampires:
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#parenting
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@ScholRLEA +1 to CordwainerSmith, has great stories
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This is a grammatically correct sentence:
"Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo."#englishisweird.