WTF Bites
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@anonymous234 said in WTF Bites:
@LaoC
http://swissindo.news/
Other than "the creator has clear schizophrenia" I literally can't understand a single thing on that site.Apparently, they think they have access to a ton (well, multiple tons) of gold and platinum from each country's and bank's secret reserves that they will use to pay off every country's debt and give everyone a monthly payment so that no one will lack anything and peace and love and joy will reign in a heaven-on-earth, as if giving people money will make them stop being jealous or greedy or fearful and will end slavery and tyranny.
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In our codebase, all table access is via stored procedures with specific name formats
usp_tableName_[insert/update/delete/select]
.WHY
It turned out the ops people have a tool they run on live to generate these procs whenever a table is added.
WHY
We're not big fans of the ops guys
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@djls45 I've heard of "sovereign citizens" who think the government is hiding bank accounts with millions of dollars from every citizen and if you ask in the right way they'll have to give you access to yours. I never thought I'd see such a serious case of that delusion though.
Payments 1-11 are backed by collateral of 78 billion kilograms of physical gold and platinum. (8 billion kilograms of gold and 70 billion kilograms of platinum.)
M1 showed a document certifying the value of the principle was 920 Quadrillion USD, at the time it was reconfirmed and re-certified at UN Headquarters on the 14th of June 2010, signed by twelve very high profile world leaders and M1. He has much more documentation that will be made public when it is safe.Jeez, that's literally Scrooge McDuck's giant gold vault.
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@anonymous234 is there a name for that phenomenon? I want to go look up stories.
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@pie_flavor It's extensively featured in the documentary series Duck Tales
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@hungrier ha ha. I mean the hiding bank accounts thing.
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@pie_flavor All I know is "sovereign citizen", you'll have to google from there. I did find these links though.
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@loopback0 There's one line in that song I could never understand, not as a kid and not today.
Tales of daring, gibberish gibberish, Duck Tales! Woo hoo!
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tales of derring-do, bad and good luck tales
https://www.collinsdictionary.com/dictionary/english/derring-do
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@loopback0 all right, I suppose that fits...
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@loopback0 said in WTF Bites:
tales of derring-do, bad and good luck tales
https://www.collinsdictionary.com/dictionary/english/derring-do
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@anonymous234 said in WTF Bites:
70 billion kilograms of platinum
Estimates for the amount of platinum bullion in existence range from 4 million to 20 million troy ounces. The best estimate I could find is about 8 million ozt., or 250000 kg.
Considering all the platinum ever mined, the majority of which is used in jewelry, automotive catalytic converters, other catalysts, and other industrial purposes, not in the form of bullion, coins or anything else fairly liquid, the estimate is about 10000 tonnes, or 10 million kg.
But the Swissindo Group somehow has access to bullion amounting to 7000 times all the platinum that has ever been mined. Sure.
INB4 "That's what they want you to think, that this platinum doesn't exist."
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@pie_flavor said in WTF Bites:
@anonymous234 is there a name for that phenomenon? I want to go look up stories.
I think you'll enjoy this very thorough treatment a Canadian judge gave the movement.
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@HardwareGeek said in WTF Bites:
@anonymous234 said in WTF Bites:
70 billion kilograms of platinum
Estimates for the amount of platinum bullion in existence range from 4 million to 20 million troy ounces. The best estimate I could find is about 8 million ozt., or 250000 kg.
Considering all the platinum ever mined, the majority of which is used in jewelry, automotive catalytic converters, other catalysts, and other industrial purposes, not in the form of bullion, coins or anything else fairly liquid, the estimate is about 10000 tonnes, or 10 million kg.
But the Swissindo Group somehow has access to bullion amounting to 7000 times all the platinum that has ever been mined. Sure.
INB4 "That's what they want you to think, that this platinum doesn't exist."
More importantly, how many money bins are needed to store that amount of platinum?
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@PleegWat The volume of 7e9 kg of platinum is 3.26e5 m^3. That's...large. Roughly the same as the internal capacity (volume, not mass) of an oil supertanker.
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@Benjamin-Hall Yeah, what I'm failing to find is the internal dimensions of the/a money bin.
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Looks like their presentation was... well... :
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@Zerosquare “Quantum AI Encryption A Novel”? Buzzword salad and LOLWUT, all in one title…
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@Zerosquare “Quantum AI Encryption A Novel”? Buzzword salad and LOLWUT, all in one title…
AI means Astrological Integers, by the way.
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AI means Astrological Integers, by the way.
Definitely more to the LOLWUT side of things then.
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@Benjamin-Hall said in WTF Bites:
@PleegWat The volume of 7e9 kg of platinum is 3.26e5 m^3. That's...large. Roughly the same as the internal capacity (volume, not mass) of an oil supertanker.
That’s really not that much
The
best selling German newspaperGerman trash tabloid BILD, roughly comparable to the British The Sun in idiocy, always has some crazy stories on the last page (ok, strictly speaking on every page), like shit about UFOs, or Hitler, or Hitler-UFOs. I don’t remember the exact details, but once years ago they had this nice info-graphic picture of the earth with a golden core with a story “Earth Core consists of 95% gold.”
I’m not quite sure if they just made it up completely while on drugs, or some of them overheard something like “95% of earth’s gold is inside the core”, and thought those statements are anywhere close to the same thing.
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@Zerosquare “Quantum AI Encryption A Novel”? Buzzword salad and LOLWUT, all in one title…
Should’ve used SCIgen, produces much better titles.
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@dkf They have a youtube advert video thing. I would have described it as nonsense technobabble, but I have a feeling that most movie-technobabble makes more sense than this:
(For those who ended up watching the video because of this post, my sincere apologies. I felt dumber afterwards too.)
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@dkf They have a youtube advert video thing. I would have described it as nonsense technobabble, but I have a feeling that most movie-technobabble makes more sense than this:
(For those who ended up watching the video because of this post, my sincere apologies. I felt dumber afterwards too.)
I had already started. They got off to a really good start with claiming a whole gaggle of scientific breakthroughs of massive scale. "Our trivial hokeypokey will make a new unified physics field!" ... I wonder if Black Hat accepted them just for a bit of comic relief because no one can take that shit seriously. I mean, that video slapped me so hard and frequently in the face with pure unabashed lies I am lost for words. Well... Not really. I can always ramble on.
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@Carnage Sponsored session, apparently. They pay, they get to talk.
There should be some oversight on how dumb those can be. On the other hand, why the fuck would one pick Black Hat out of all the places for something like this? Must be seriously deluded if they think there wouldn't be any pushback.
I hope they post the session online, kinda curious how bad it was. Also kinda doubt they will.
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Video @cvi linked in WTF Bites:
Your DNA is protected only by a single, static, encryption algorithm.
Um, no, it's not. It's not even encrypted, actually!
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@heterodox said in WTF Bites:
@pie_flavor said in WTF Bites:
@anonymous234 is there a name for that phenomenon? I want to go look up stories.
I think you'll enjoy this very thorough treatment a Canadian judge gave the movement.
Wow. That's quite a read.
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@Benjamin-Hall said in WTF Bites:
@PleegWat The volume of 7e9 kg of platinum is 3.26e5 m^3. That's...large. Roughly the same as the internal capacity (volume, not mass) of an oil supertanker.
70 billion, not 7 billion, so 3.26e6 m^3. Which would make a cube 148 m on a side.
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@HardwareGeek said in WTF Bites:
@Benjamin-Hall said in WTF Bites:
@PleegWat The volume of 7e9 kg of platinum is 3.26e5 m^3. That's...large. Roughly the same as the internal capacity (volume, not mass) of an oil supertanker.
70 billion, not 7 billion, so 3.26e6 m^3. Which would make a cube 148 m on a side.
I must have misread that. That's a...large chunk of platinum.
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@dkf They have a youtube advert video thing. I would have described it as nonsense technobabble, but I have a feeling that most movie-technobabble makes more sense than this:
(For those who ended up watching the video because of this post, my sincere apologies. I felt dumber afterwards too.)
That's not a Westworld trailer?
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@HardwareGeek said in WTF Bites:
Wow. That's quite a read.
It is. If you want to fall even further down the rabbit hole, enjoy Idiot Legal Arguments and all its citations.
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@heterodox I spent more than enough time down the rabbit hole already, TYVM.
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@HardwareGeek said in WTF Bites:
@heterodox said in WTF Bites:
@pie_flavor said in WTF Bites:
@anonymous234 is there a name for that phenomenon? I want to go look up stories.
I think you'll enjoy this very thorough treatment a Canadian judge gave the movement.
Wow. That's quite a read.
Yeah. I like that part:
Counsel for Ms. Meads, Ms. Reeves, sought case management because she cannot meaningfully communicate with Mr. Meads.
She's not the only one, or so it seems.
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A support note from Cupertino, spotted by AppleInsider, says the card should be kept away from leather and denim to avoid discolouration, and also away from hard surfaces, to avoid scratching its white finish.
Users are warned not to use household cleaners on the card, nor compressed air and aersols, nor any solvents, or ammonia, or anything abrasive to clean it.
(...)
"Place your card in a slot in your wallet or billfold without touching another credit card. If two credit cards are placed in the same slot your card could become scratched," Apple adds.
I love it. They managed to make even their credit cards special.
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@Zerosquare if not for leather or denim, what other things are wallets even made of?
Did they only test it on Tim Cook’s gold wallet??
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In a Twitter exchange with Grant, respected International Computer Science Institute researcher Nicholas Weaver implied the company was comprised of "snake-oil vendors."
Well, they aren't. Snake-oil vendors make semi-believable claims because they know they're tricking people. This guy (because there's no way the "company" is more than one guy) is an old fashioned quantum mysticist who totally believes all this.
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thought those statements are anywhere close to the same thing.
Hey! It's called paraphrasing. Just cut out a couple unimportant words and ... profit!
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@Carnage Sponsored session, apparently. They pay, they get to talk.
There should be some oversight on how dumb those can be. On the other hand, why the fuck would one pick Black Hat out of all the places for something like this? Must be seriously deluded if they think there wouldn't be any pushback.
I hope they post the session online, kinda curious how bad it was. Also kinda doubt they will.
I really hope it goes to trial. And the judge says "You're a bunch of <insert proper legal term> idiots!" and makes them pay for everything.
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@HardwareGeek said in WTF Bites:
@heterodox said in WTF Bites:
@pie_flavor said in WTF Bites:
@anonymous234 is there a name for that phenomenon? I want to go look up stories.
I think you'll enjoy this very thorough treatment a Canadian judge gave the movement.
Wow. That's quite a read.
No wonder it's so long!
I will respond on a point-by-point basis to the broad spectrum of OPCA schemes, concepts, and arguments advanced in this action by Mr. Meads.
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@Carnage Sponsored session, apparently. They pay, they get to talk.
There should be some oversight on how dumb those can be. On the other hand, why the fuck would one pick Black Hat out of all the places for something like this? Must be seriously deluded if they think there wouldn't be any pushback.
I hope they post the session online, kinda curious how bad it was. Also kinda doubt they will.
I really hope it goes to trial. And the judge says "You're a bunch of <insert proper legal term> idiots!" and makes them pay for everything.
Over here in Germany some of those nutjobs tried to revoke their citizenship (because they're "sovereign citizens" or something) by returning their identity cards (because, you see, it's called a "Personalausweis" where the word "Personal" can also be translated as "staff member". Which to them means that they're employed by a company named Germany and not a state. Yeah, it's weird)
The municipalities were first a bit amused and then annoyed. They got rid of the nutjobs returning their cards simply by foisting a holding fee on them - 5€ per day the card was lying around in their office. That put a stop to this particular idiocy in some states.
Other states are not affected as much and thus think the current rules sufficient where someone who does not possess the proper identification materials can be fined up to 50,000€.
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what other things are wallets even made of?
Mine's made of some sort of fabric.
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@Zerosquare said in WTF Bites:
A support note from Cupertino, spotted by AppleInsider, says the card should be kept away from leather and denim to avoid discolouration, and also away from hard surfaces, to avoid scratching its white finish.
Users are warned not to use household cleaners on the card, nor compressed air and aersols, nor any solvents, or ammonia, or anything abrasive to clean it.
(...)
"Place your card in a slot in your wallet or billfold without touching another credit card. If two credit cards are placed in the same slot your card could become scratched," Apple adds.
I love it. They managed to make even their credit cards special.
in a dedicated thread: https://what.thedailywtf.com/topic/26773/apple-stay-away-from-from-leather-and-denim
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@heterodox My friend Kevin Underhill has a hobby you may be interested in.
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@TwelveBaud said in WTF Bites:
@heterodox My friend Kevin Underhill has a hobby you may be interested in.
ordering plaintiff to show cause why he should not be sanctioned for “filing a motion for improper purposes,” such as those hinted at in the title of the pleading, “Motion to Kiss My Ass.”
I see some of our forum members have been active in court.
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@TwelveBaud said in WTF Bites:
@heterodox My friend Kevin Underhill has a hobby you may be interested in.
From very deep in that rabbit hole, yet another "sovereign citizen" case (emphasis added):
This may be a family-sovereignty issue. During his second arraignment, Christiansen was accompanied by his dad and his uncle, both of whom said they also do not recognize the court's authority and had encouraged the younger Christiansen not to "participate" in the proceedings. I found it just a little odd that the uncle, Lars Christiansen, does not recognize governmental authority despite the fact that he is a New Hampshire state representative. I assume he goes to the capital and just sits quietly every day in order to make sure he doesn't do anything that might oppress his fellow sovereigns.
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AI means Astrological Integers, by the way.
Definitely more to the LOLWUT side of things then.
Their site is here: https://timeai.io/
They have a video, which is entertaining. There are two claims there:
- The CEO made some kind of mathematical discovery that makes factoring large primes easy. This breaks current encryption methods that rely on prime factorization being difficult.
- Crown Sterling has some new encryption technique that doesn't rely on primes.
I find
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plausible, though it seems like it would be pretty easy to demonstrate, and I'm not aware that anyone has. It definitely seems like the sort of thing that someone around here would notice and make some noise about.But
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sounded like a Star Trek episode to me. Which may simply be my unfamiliarity with the math they claimed to be talking about, or some misleading descriptions, as you often get when someone tries to explain technical details to a lay audience.