Big Money



  • First time poster, but I had a crazy experience this week that I just had to share.  I've been working on a site for an environmentally friendly manufacturer who's new to Canada and is participating in a government assistance program.  He hired me to design and support his web page, with price to be negotiated upon completion.  Three months after completion, he finally offers payment- $300.  Not exactly what I would have asked for, but I realize he's making a limited income so far, so, why not. 

    Leave my day job early, drive 45 minutes, and arrive at his office at 3:00pm (after pestering him for the quoted amount for a couple of weeks).  He says that he can't make payment because his accountant needs to authorize all payments, my solution is to put his bicycle in the trunk of my car, and drive him to his accountant's home so that I can recieve a cheque for the $300. After a hair-raising half-hour drive, almost losing the bike out the back-end of my small car a dozen times, we arrive.  He goes in, and twenty minutes later, I have my cheque. 

    Well, $300 isn't exactly a prize, so after humming and hawing for awhile, I decide to go to the casino with it and blow it on slots.  Long story short- it was a mighty good day!  Won about $6,500 at Flamboro Racetrack & Slots!   Now that's more like it!  Definitely proves that persistence pays off, and sometimes accepting a dollar amount below your normal price range pays dividends of karmic proportion. 🙂



  • @stiggz said:

    I decide to go to the casino
    @stiggz said:
    Flamboro Racetrack & Slots
    I refuse to accept the term "casino" for any establishment without table games.  Unless I can follow the immortal words of Dr. Wesley Snipes, Esq. and always bet on black, it's not worth the trouble.

    Wait a minute, this place is strictly harness racing?  Harness racing: it's like chariot racing without the speed or violence!



  • 🙂 Here's the site I'd designed for him..

     www.kajotec.com

    You should try to purchase some of his items, they are very revolutionary.. 🙂



  • @stiggz said:

    You should try to purchase some of his items, they are very revolutionary.. 🙂
    There's only the one...



  • @Lingerance said:

    @stiggz said:
    You should try to purchase some of his items, they are very revolutionary.. 🙂
    There's only the one...

    @Crazy Person's Site said:

    9) For a province like Quebec, which has about 2,000,000 water heaters,
    the savings will bee approximately 2,828,385 tonnes of CO2 per year in
    Quebec alone.

    lol



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    bee
     

    n. bee

    One to which the act of existing has been applied.

    See also:

    beer



  • @dhromed said:

    beer

    I'm much beer than you!



  • @derula said:

    I'm much beer more drunk than you!
     

     



  • @dhromed said:

    @derula said:
    I'm much beer more drunk phone booth than you!



  • @derula said:

    @dhromed said:
    @derula said:
    I'm much beer more drunk phone booth than you!
     
     

    Hwæt!



  • @Crazy Person's Site said:

    9) For a province like Quebec, which has about 2,000,000 water heaters, the savings will bee approximately 2,828,385 tonnes of CO2 per year in Quebec alone.
     

    lmao thanks! Didn't copy check, but I almost like it better as bee, very green



  • @dhromed said:

    Hwæt!

    Have at you!



  • @derula said:

    @dhromed said:
    Hwæt!

    Have at you!
     

    hwæt u sæ!!!1



  • @dhromed said:

    @derula said:
    @dhromed said:
    Hwæt!
    Have at you!
    hwæt u sæ!!!1
    Do they speak English in hwæt!?



  • @Xyro said:

    Do they speak English in hwæt!?
     

    some kind of Merliny unlanguage gibberish, I thænk.



  • @dhromed said:

    @Xyro said:

    Do they speak English in hwæt!?
     

    some kind of Merliny unlanguage gibberish, I thænk.

    So, Canadian English?



  • @bstorer said:

    So, Canadian English?
     

    I don't think that's very funny.

    Not insulting or anything, because I don't mind.

    It's just not funny.

    You might try again.



  • @dhromed said:

    @bstorer said:

    So, Canadian English?
     

    I don't think that's very funny.

    Not insulting or anything, because I don't mind.

    It's just not funny.

    You might try again.

    Oh, I didn't realize it had to be personally insulting.  How about "so, the sound of someone trying to speak around the dick in their mouth?"



  • @bstorer said:

    Oh, I didn't realize it had to be personally insulting. 
     

    Apologies for not being clear.

    Usually, when people say "That's not funny" they're slightly insulted. I don't mean that here.



  • @dhromed said:

    Usually, when people say "That's not funny" they're slightly insulted. I don't mean that here.
    Well, with that bowl of dicks in your stomach, are you in-dick-ed?  It's like being insulted, but tastier.

    Inquiring minds want to know.



  • @belgariontheking said:

    Well, with that bowl of dicks in your stomach, are you in-dick-ed?  It's like being insulted, but tastier.
     

    It would be an indicktment.



  • @belgariontheking said:

    Well, with that bowl of dicks in your stomach
    You swallowed the bowl?  You're supposed to eat what's in the bowl.   Classic container/reference problem.



  • @Xyro said:

    @belgariontheking said:
    Well, with that bowl of dicks in your stomach
    You swallowed the bowl?
    Technically, dhromed did.@Xyro said:
    You're supposed to eat what's in the bowl.   Classic container/reference problem.
      More troubling is the bizarre type that has developed as a result: dhromed is a dick, has a dick, and contains a bowl full of dicks.  The potential for reference loops is high.  He could very well wind up in a bowl full of dicks in his own stomach, eating his own dick.  Messy.



  • Prepare for the dickularity.

     



  • This is what's wrong with so many programming languages out there: they fail to properly isolate the distinction bewteen IS-A and HAS-A.   If an object, say dhromed in this case, both is-a dick and has-a dick (or collection of them in his stomach) then imo the object is conceptually flawed.  Oh, the anti-patterns that swirl before me.  Sadly, forwarding wrapper (aka proxy) objects either require a dynamic language that binds calls late (which may be undesirable) or a new class for every single object that requires such proxying (which usually has to be coded by hand).

    Now, assuming dhromed is some sort of half-baked proxy object, I would take it that dhromed himself is an interface for his own dick and (perhaps optionally) all the dicks in his bowl.  That is, whatever is done to dhromed get's forwarded to all the dicks in his collection.  While useful as a broadcasting-style pattern, this can lead to unexpected behavior when dhromed is applied to himself, as bstorer mentioned.

    I recommend fully refactoring the system so that the forwarding dick is a separate and distinct class from the dick itself. This will completely side-step the issue of unwanted recursion or otherwise ugly code to prevent it.



  • @Xyro said:

    I recommend fully refactoring the system so that the forwarding dick is a separate and distinct class from the dick itself. This will completely side-step the issue of unwanted recursion or otherwise ugly code to prevent it.
    Agreed.  Here's my roadmap to fix this:

    Step 1: dhromed may either continue being a dick, or continue enjoying dicks, but not both.  IS-A or HAS-A only.

    Step 2: We have to cut off dhromed's dick.  Either he is a dick with a dick, which leaves is in that same category of both IS-A and HAS-A, or he is full of dicks with a dick, in which case that one dick is being proxied differently than all the others, which is wrong.

    Thus, I move that we immediately get dhromed a sex change, so that he can continue to enjoy dicks.  Hopefully the hormones will make him more agreeable.  It's win-win, really.  With that in mind:

    Step 3: Profit!



  • @bstorer said:

    Step 2: We have to cut off dhromed's dick.  Either he is a dick with a dick, which leaves is in that same category of both IS-A and HAS-A, or he is full of dicks with a dick, in which case that one dick is being proxied differently than all the others, which is wrong.
    This is a good idea.  I'd like to point out that it has the added benefit of requiring dhromed to swallow his own dick (or we force-feed it to him).  Then it can be a normal, programmatic member of the collection contained by the bowl in his bowels.



  • @Xyro said:

    dhromed is some sort of half-baked proxy object

    This is quite possible the most delightfully inspiring description of my persona I have ever encountered.



  • @bstorer said:

    IS-A or HAS-A only.
     

    HAS-A

    My dick is a member-property of this, which is a singleton.

    Its value may be inserted into other containers, but only as reference, and only one at a time. Actions taken unto my dick will apply exclusively to the only extant instance of this.



  • @dhromed said:

    HAS-A
    Then you will have to be refactored to not be a dick.@dhromed said:
    Its value may be inserted
    Wait wait, its value?  This is essentially the same reference problem that we encountered previously.  Who wrote this code?  Is your dick just a wrapper for the value (aka a value object), or does the object have some useful and encapsulated functionality to go with it?  Why would its value be used instead of the dick itself? The value should be private to the object itself, accessible only through well-designed object-oriented practices. Just insert your dick into the container and have the container do its thing through your dick's API.

    (This has the added benefit of being able to take advantage of decorator patterns on your dick.)



  • @Xyro said:

    Then you will have to be refactored to not be a dick.
     

    Change is hard.

    @Xyro said:

    Is your dick just a wrapper for the value

    Evolutionary geneticists would think so, but I like to think I'm more than just syntactic sugar.

    @Xyro said:

    does the object have some useful and encapsulated functionality to go with it?

    That's what she said!

    You know, when I was naked in bed with her!

    Humor!

    @Xyro said:

    Why would its value be used instead of the dick itself?

    It depends on the state of the interface, I guess.

    @Xyro said:

    The value should be private to the object itself, accessible only through well-designed object-oriented practices. Just insert your dick into the container and have the container do its thing through your dick's API.

    I agree with this, but I think the member should be private as well, and is a reference set when this goes into scope, and is initially the original factory object, up until this is extended with a generic interface at about 12% of its lifetime. It is then set to NULL, and may at some point thereafter reference a different factory object to gain exclusive access to the dick member.

    @Xyro said:

    take advantage of decorator patterns on your dick.

    I don't Swing that way.



  • @stiggz said:

     He hired me to design and support his web page, with price to be negotiated [B]upon completion[/B]. 

    WHAAAAAAAT?



  •  Don't worry it's not complete.

     

    http://www.kajotec.com/index.php/products



  • 404'd.   You need to capitalize the I in Index all over your website.  Or change index.php to lower case, which would probably be better.

    http://www.kajotec.com/index_files/image002.gif  Nice dithering.



  • lol thanks- i'm done now though, I did CodeIgniter for the innards, now someone else has taken over and is wrapping the whole site using some GUI editor b/c they don't get php.. should become quite interesting in the future, unless they totally rework.



  • @stiggz said:

    lol thanks- i'm done now though, I did CodeIgniter for the innards, now someone else has taken over and is wrapping the whole site using some GUI editor b/c they don't get php.. should become quite interesting in the future, unless they totally rework.

    Intentional necropost. I was rereading some old threads, and visited the site this thread is about. If you feel adventurous, you could try a view source:

    </v:shapetype><v:shape id="Picture_x0020_5" o:spid="_x0000_s1040" type="#_x0000_t75"
     style='position:absolute;margin-left:0;margin-top:0;width:660.45pt;height:426.25pt;
     z-index:-1;visibility:visible;mso-wrap-distance-left:9pt;
     mso-wrap-distance-top:0;mso-wrap-distance-right:9.05pt;
     mso-wrap-distance-bottom:3.58pt;mso-position-horizontal:center;
     mso-position-horizontal-relative:text;mso-position-vertical:center;
     mso-position-vertical-relative:page' o:gfxdata="UEsDBBQABgAIAAAAIQBHPW7kCQEAABMCAAATAAAAW0NvbnRlbnRfVHlwZXNdLnhtbJSRQU7DMBBF
    90jcwfIWxQ5dIISSdEHKEhAqB7DsSWI1HlseE9rb47RlQQSVWNrWm//+uFrv3cgmiGQ91vxWlJwB
    am8s9jV/3z4V95xRUmjU6BFqfgDi6+b6qtoeAhDLNFLNh5TCg5SkB3CKhA+A+aXz0amUj7GXQemd

    <snip> 

    Ah... nice. Apparently "Some GUI editor" means Word.



  • Yay Word!



  • @Medezark said:

    Yay Word!

    The bird is the word



  • @b-redeker said:

    @stiggz said:

    lol thanks- i'm done now though, I did CodeIgniter for the innards, now someone else has taken over and is wrapping the whole site using some GUI editor b/c they don't get php.. should become quite interesting in the future, unless they totally rework.

    Intentional necropost. I was rereading some old threads, and visited the site this thread is about. If you feel adventurous, you could try a view source:

    </v:shapetype><v:shape id="Picture_x0020_5" o:spid="_x0000_s1040" type="#_x0000_t75"
     style='positionabsolute;margin-left:0;margin-top:0;width:660.45pt;height:426.25pt;
     z-index:-1;visibility:visible;mso-wrap-distance-left:9pt;
     mso-wrap-distance-top:0;mso-wrap-distance-right:9.05pt;
     mso-wrap-distance-bottom:3.58pt;mso-position-horizontal:center;
     mso-position-horizontal-relative:text;mso-position-vertical:center;
     mso-position-vertical-relative:page' o:gfxdata="UEsDBBQABgAIAAAAIQBHPW7kCQEAABMCAAATAAAAW0NvbnRlbnRfVHlwZXNdLnhtbJSRQU7DMBBF
    90jcwfIWxQ5dIISSdEHKEhAqB7DsSWI1HlseE9rb47RlQQSVWNrWm//+uFrv3cgmiGQ91vxWlJwB
    am8s9jV/3z4V95xRUmjU6BFqfgDi6+b6qtoeAhDLNFLNh5TCg5SkB3CKhA+A+aXz0amUj7GXQemd

    <snip> 

    Ah... nice. Apparently "Some GUI editor" means Word.

     

    It's always nice to see images lumped into the page comments as base64


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