The Cooking Thread
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@polygeekery said in The Cooking Thread:
The one I shared?
Most probably. I have all the ingredients in my fridge to make another batch soon :face_savouring_delicious_food:
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@polygeekery Yes. Still fantastic.
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@weng glad everyone likes it. I need to make it again soon.
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Recent cooking adventures:
Most Sundays I try to make a good family breakfast. This last Sunday it was "Toad in the hole" along with bacon and sausage. I have made it before but this was a first for the kids. They really liked it. I think it was mostly the name, but if there is a simple dish that pleases the kids I am all for it. Especially when it is also tasty.
Also, a couple of times a year I do homemade fried chicken. I am not sure why I don't do it more often as it is super easy and super tasty. I have the recipe pretty much down to an art now so if anyone wants it I am happy to share. Baseline is an overnight soak in buttermilk, heavily seasoned flour and a double dredge. It is a foolproof way to end up with super crispy chicken. This time my two year old kept asking for more of the crispies off of the cooling rack so I think I was doing it right.
Upcoming food aventures:
Tomorrow is my wife's birthday and she asked for Brutus Salad with pork chops. Always a favorite around here. Normally she asks for something a little more fancy but this time she threw me a slow one right over the plate so I am not going to question it.
Father's Day is this Sunday so I get to make whatever I want so tomorrow I am going to pick up a whole brisket from Costco and smoke that on the pellet grill. I will start it the night before and then old it until lunchtime/dinnertime in a cooler so it turns out buttery tender. Just a few minutes to crisp up the bark over direct flame and it will be good to go. With the pellet grill I am OK with letting it run overnight. Planning on also serving potato salad, macaroni salad and baked beans. I have amazing recipes for all three if anyone is interested.
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@polygeekery said in The Cooking Thread:
Father's Day is this Sunday so I get to make whatever I want so tomorrow I am going to pick up a whole brisket from Costco and smoke that on the pellet grill. I will start it the night before and then old it until lunchtime/dinnertime in a cooler so it turns out buttery tender. Just a few minutes to crisp up the bark over direct flame and it will be good to go. With the pellet grill I am OK with letting it run overnight. Planning on also serving potato salad, macaroni salad and baked beans. I have amazing recipes for all three if anyone is interested.
Can I crash this event pretty please?
@polygeekery said in The Cooking Thread:
I do homemade fried chicken. I am not sure why I don't do it more often as it is super easy and super tasty. I have the recipe pretty much down to an art now so if anyone wants it I am happy to share.
I would love to know. Homemade Fried chicken always ends up fucky when I try, I just attribute it to my incompetence.
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@stillwater said in The Cooking Thread:
Can I crash this event pretty please?
Ha! I thought your people didn't eat beef?
@stillwater said in The Cooking Thread:
I would love to know. Homemade Fried chicken always ends up fucky when I try, I just attribute it to my incompetence.
This is a good primer:
Chef John's Buttermilk Fried Chicken
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Buttermilk fried chicken that's crispy and tender. Whole chicken pieces are soaked in buttermilk, coated in seasoned flour, then fried until crisp.
Where I vary from his technique is that I double the amount of seasoning in the flour and I also lightly salt the chicken when I first pull it from the buttermilk for dredging. I also double dredge my chicken. Pull from buttermilk, use your hand to squeegee off most of the buttermilk, dredge once and make sure you thoroughly coat the chicken, quick dip back in the buttermilk and dredge again. You also need to let the chicken rest once it is dredged so the breading adheres properly. 5-10 minutes on a cooling rack so air can get to all sides and set the dredge. If you skip this step the breading has a high chance of coming off in the oil.
He recommends deep frying in peanut oil and that works fine but even with my high output cooktop I find it hard to keep the oil at temperature. You can either do it in two batches or maybe use two dutch ovens. You can also use a 12" cast iron skillet with 1/2"-1" of vegetable shortening in it. Much more than that and it may overflow when you put the chicken in. Most recommendations for this type of cooking say to only turn once. That's wrong in my opinion. You want to turn twice. If you do that it sort of gets double-fried and super brown and crispy.
The double dredging gets you super crispy breading. If that is not your thing then go with a single dredging. Also, seriously don't skip the rest before you fry. If you do you will end up with pan fried chicken and your breading will end up in the oil and not on your chicken.
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Kobe beef hot dogs at > $14/lb:
Wagyu Beef Hot Dogs
Wagyu beef hot dogs for sale in bulk. AKA American Kobe Beef. Grill these up & upgrade your next barbecue to fine-dining levels!
That's the Cooking Thread version of Poe or Noe right there.
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12.5 hours in the smoke. Started at 10PM, pulled at 203F at 10:30AM:
It is now wrapped in foil and towels and resting in a styrofoam cooler until 2PM when we plan to eat.
15.3lbs when I bought it. I probably trimmed off at least a pound of fat (and nearly cut off my left index finger in the process).
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That was the best brisket I have ever eaten. Nothing else even comes close.
The homemade ice cream was really good also. Banana ice cream and it was a Taste of Home recipe if anyone wants it.
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I am intrigued by this.
Slow-Roasted, Twice-Fried Porterhouse Steak
We wouldn't tell you to score, season, chill, freeze, fry, slow roast, baste, and refry a porterhouse if it wasn't worth it, and in this recipe, it is.
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Woman Poisons Dozens at Housewarming Party Trying to Kill Family Who Made Fun of Her Cooking
A 23-year-old woman from Khalapur, India, is risking the death penalty for poisoning the food at a relative's housewarming party in an attempt to kill attendees who made fun of her dark completion and cooking skills. Police in Khalapur claim that 23-year-old Pradnya Survase confessed to mixing...
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@boomzilla said in The Cooking Thread:
I am intrigued by this.
We wouldn't tell you to score, season, chill, freeze, fry, slow roast, baste, and refry a porterhouse if it wasn't worth it, and in this recipe, it is.
That looks amazing. I think this is an easier way of doing it though:
I tried freezing and defrosting and it didn't really seem to help. The torch gives you an amazing crust while still having the middle blue
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@boomzilla said in The Cooking Thread:
A 23-year-old woman from Khalapur, India, is risking the death penalty for poisoning the food at a relative's housewarming party in an attempt to kill attendees who made fun of her dark completion and cooking skills. Police in Khalapur claim that 23-year-old Pradnya Survase confessed to mixing...
I love how the headline mentions only half the problem. I'm pretty sure she was rightfully pissed at the husband and in-laws. The sexism and misoginy against daughter-in-laws make sexism in the western world seem like child's play. I'm intrigued where she got the venom though.
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@stillwater snake venom would normally be digested harmlessly. It would only be harmful if it got into your bloodstream somehow.
The article said snake poison, which I took to mean some toxic substance used to poison snakes.
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@anotherusername said in The Cooking Thread:
The article said snake poison, which I took to mean some toxic substance used to poison snakes.
Oh I assumed it was venom. I was not aware people want to fucking poison snakes. Jesus! But yeah I don't know shit about snakes so yeah maybe there are legit reasons for poisoning goddamn snakes.
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@stillwater If they're trying to get at your food or something? I dunno. But while it's not nearly as fun as picking it up by the neck and cracking it like a whip, you sort of don't want to do that with anything really poisonous in case it's faster than you are.
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Tonight for dinner: Char Siu, Asian-style Smashed Cucumber Salad and Asian Noodle Salad.
Chinese Barbeque Pork (Char Siu)
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With its impressive high-gloss appearance and savory taste, Chef John's Chinese barbeque pork is easy to make at home--even without a fancy ceramic grill.
Smashed Cucumber Salad
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This smashed cucumber salad with spicy garlic-soy dressing is Chef John's all-time favorite summer side dish. Perfect with grilled meat or shrimp.
https://www.allrecipes.com/recipe/83087/oriental-cold-noodle-salad/
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This all turned out to an amazing dinner. I used boneless country style ribs instead of pork shoulder. Mostly because I could not find a 3lb shoulder. All the ones around here are 6-8 lbs.
Char Siu is pretty amazing. Sticky, smoky, with a very deep flavor from the 5 Spice. Would recommend. It also looks super complicated but is dead easy to make. That's basically my style when it comes to food. Looks fancier than it is.
Tonight I am looking through Meathead and I came across this nugget:
I love this cookbook.
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Hmmm....
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@boomzilla I feel like it needs a waffle and syrup to go with the chicken.
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@boomzilla I would totally buy one of those, but my record on buying food from soul food restaurants is not great. (Have I told that story before?)
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@Polygeekery I don't recall any such story.
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@boomzilla Well, the jist of it is that I went in to a soul food restaurant that had made the big leap and gotten rave reviews from a couple of local foodie magazines and before I had paid I got called a "cracker" among other things. So I left. A few months later they had went under. So they wasted a great opportunity in getting exposure to a wide audience but by calling 77% of the USA by a racist name (presumably I was not the only one) they ran off a huge chunk of their prospective audience.
My lunch outing to the place went something like this (after I ordered my food, of course):
"Hey Lamar, you remember to order the crackers?!?!"
-laughing- "Naw man, but I will tomorrow."Lather, rinse, repeat.
It has been so long ago that I honestly don't remember if I just didn't pay or had already paid and threw my food away when I left (disregard the earlier comment, it is all fussy at this point, I think that I just threw my food away on leaving but time muddies memory). Either way, I assume I wasn't the only one to get that sort of service as they did not stay in business too long after that. They squandered a good thing because they had rave reviews up to that point.
Moral of the story: Good food can't beat racism, no matter your skin color. No one spends money where they don't feel welcome.
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@Polygeekery What if they're racist against all races?
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@pie_flavor said in The Cooking Thread:
@Polygeekery What if they're racist against all races?
A restaurant run on misanthropy would probably not fair any better, but these guys seemed to particularly not care for white people in their restaurant.
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I'ma probably fuck this up, but I'ma give a go at making my own bread today as something to do while I'm on PTO.
Using a french bread recipe I found online, with a minor substitution (using butter instead of vegetable oil, since I don't have any).
Will report back on how badly this turns out :D
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@e4tmyl33t said in The Cooking Thread:
Using a french bread recipe I found online, with a minor substitution (using butter instead of vegetable oil, since I don't have any).
I would have to see the recipe to make sure but you may be making American sandwich bread. I once made it with the kids and that was what stood out to me in the recipe, the substitution of melted butter for the fat in the bread.
Not that it is a bad thing, but if the texture is not quite "French bread" that will be why.
Good luck. Making bread is pretty easy. Don't stress.
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@Polygeekery Recipe is this one: https://www.melskitchencafe.com/french-bread/
And if it ends up as sandwich bread that's got somewhat more flavor than white bread, I'll be fine with that.
Edit: That actually gives me an idea. If this makes enough dough for two loaves, I may do one on a baking sheet with the ice they mention to make it crispier, and one in a loaf pan without said ice, and see if it can work as an all-purpose.
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@e4tmyl33t Watching progress bars to making bread! Good luck!
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My grocery store has had these packs of shaved beef lately. I finally picked one up to give it a try.
- I put a little bit of oil in a small pan, heat it up (medium)
- Put half of the beef in (one package gets me two lunches).
- Sprinkle liberally with adobo.
- Stir a lot to cook evenly.
- When the beef is partly cooked I sprinkle in some dehydrated onions.
- Then when it's about done I put some slices of asiago cheese on top and cover to let that melt.
Put it in a bowl and enjoy a tasty low carb lunch.
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Bread adventure chronicle:
Mixed together everything pretty much as directed by the recipe I posted earlier. I used slightly more than 2tbsp butter as I've read that you need to increase the amount by about 20% when substituting butter for vegetable oil.
A note for myself for later, if I ever try this again: Before the dough is completely mixed, it is STICKY AS FUCK. I had to switch from using my spoon (plastic, because I'm not a cooky-type person usually and it usually suffices) to using my hands around the time I added the fourth cup of flour because it was too thick for the spoon to navigate. This did not mean it wasn't going to pollute the HELL out of my hands with something I probably could've used for wall spackle, but I made do (and left some doughy prints on my flour bag...gotta see if I still have a container to put that in now that the bag's open).
After 5 cups of flour I started doing small trickles until the dough stopped sticking to the sides of the bowl. It still seems a bit...layery? Stringy?
Anyway, it's now resting for an hour so it can rise before the rest of the process.
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@e4tmyl33t said in The Cooking Thread:
I used slightly more than 2tbsp butter as I've read that you need to increase the amount by about 20% when substituting butter for vegetable oil.
One thing I should have mentioned earlier is that when substituting butter for oil you need to reduce the amount of water or other liquids to accommodate. Butter is an emulsion of oil and water so you need to add slightly more butter than straight oil, as you did. But you should also reduce the amount of water you added.
In this case, for this recipe, I do not think that will be critical. But it is something to keep in mind.
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@e4tmyl33t For bread (or any other heavy dough), your hands are probably the best mixer once it comes together short of a stand mixer (or for some recipes a food processor).
It takes some practice to get the kneading right, but no-knead bread is super simple--it's a wet dough so you just throw the stuff in there, mix together, and then let it sit in the fridge overnight (or for a few days) and then rough-shape and throw in the oven.
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@e4tmyl33t I'm already thinking I may have screwed this up. After Rise #1 (an hour), some of the inside still seemed a little sticky and the outside didn't seem to like being folded in upon itself (as in I could pretty much immediately unfold it again with little issue).
I separated it out into two halves, added a smidge more flour to each and yanked them around some, and now they're sitting for Rise #2. We'll see how they turn out, I suppose. At least I can say it's unlikely I'll inadvertently poison myself with these, they'll just probably taste like ass and/or not bake right.
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@e4tmyl33t Ok, Rise #2 seems to have completed well enough, so now the oven's heating up to see if this might actually turn out OK.
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@e4tmyl33t the outside of the dough ball can tend to get dry while it rises. Sealing the bowl better can help, or I've seen some people recommend putting a moist kitchen towel over the top (make sure it doesn't touch the dough though). If it does get a bit dry, it should typically knead back together without creating too much of an issue. Also, I've always used another oiled bowl for letting the dough rise, and when you put the dough in it you flip the dough over once so it has a coating of oil on top to act as a moisture barrier.
In any case the worst that can happen will be that it'll end up being an ugly loaf and not quite have the right texture. As long as the recipe wasn't badly messed up (forgetting an ingredient), it'll still be something that is edible and resembles bread.
Also, while it's wonderful when it's hot from the oven, I've never had fresh bread that kept tolerably well; it becomes extremely crumbly. Still edible, of course, but it's nowhere near as delicious as fresh. Refrigerate or freeze whatever doesn't get eaten immediately though because it'll mold quicker than store-bought bread. Soft bread rolls fare the best since they can afford to be crumbly, but sandwich bread always gets too crumbly and falls apart, even when it's made with high-gluten bread flour.
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@anotherusername Yeah, I did cover the bowl and whatnot with clingwrap while I let it rise, but this clingwrap has apparently decided that half its name is inaccurate and it didn't cling to shit, so it was at best lightly draped over the bowl.
Shoved them in the oven in Convection mode at 375. Giving them 25-30 minutes, give or take. Got about 10 minutes left on that and we'll see how bad I am at baking :D
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@e4tmyl33t Did the recipe call for a convection oven? If you put the oven in convection mode you may need to shorten the cook time.
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@anotherusername The recipe mentioned that you can cook both in the same time if you use a convection oven rather than doing them one at a time, as long as you rotate them halfway through (which I did).
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@e4tmyl33t On the upside, even if this turns out like shit, my house smells like baking bread, which is actually rather pleasant.
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@e4tmyl33t said in The Cooking Thread:
this clingwrap has apparently decided that half its name is inaccurate and it didn't cling to shit
Yeah, they changed the formulations on those a few years ago. It might have been one of the PBA things? All new cling wrap is total shit.
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Ok, pulled out of the oven. Outside crust is definitely crispy as it is (I didn't bother using the ice cubes they mentioned in the article and put both halves into loaf pans because I didn't have a clean baking sheet). I'd put it a little less crispy than french bread usually is (which I usually find as "crunchy", where this is just "crispy". It also loks a little like a malformed Lovecraftian horror with the swirlies.
Inside is rather thick, and a little bland on its own.
But is damn tasty with some butter on it.
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@e4tmyl33t that's a really good first effort. It only gets easier from here.
A little tip to get a smooth finish on the top: You can always find a way to stretch the dough smooth on one side. Put that up and hide all the ugliness on the bottom where it doesn't matter.
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@Polygeekery Indeed. I'll have to remember that for next time (and also not try to save 2 minutes by letting it do Rise #2 already in the loaf pans), but it's not like the swirlies are keeping it from being edible, so I'll call this a win. Or at least not a loss.
Despite the firmness of the crust, the inside is definitely more compressible than I'd expected (though, then again, I'm only used to store-bought pre-sliced bread), so we'll see whether or not it's worth making sandwiches out of. I'll cover up and fridge the second loaf for now. Will probably try the sandwich test tomorrow.
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@e4tmyl33t said in The Cooking Thread:
but it's not like the swirlies are keeping it from being edible, so I'll call this a win.
Indeed and you should. Bread is super simple to make yet intimidates so many people.
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@Benjamin-Hall said in The Cooking Thread:
a stand mixer
Best purchase I ever made. I have the KitchenAid beast.
edit: And the meat grinder, pasta extruder, and some other attachments I've forgotten about
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@Polygeekery said in The Cooking Thread:
@e4tmyl33t said in The Cooking Thread:
this clingwrap has apparently decided that half its name is inaccurate and it didn't cling to shit
Yeah, they changed the formulations on those a few years ago. It might have been one of the PBA things? All new cling wrap is total shit.
Except it clings to itself with the tenacity of gorilla tape, bot only when you want to cut it off the gorram roll.
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@M_Adams
I mean, i'd still take self-clingy over others-clingy any day of the week. Oh, wait, we're not talking about girlfriends, never mind, carry on...
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@dcon yeah, a KitchenAid was one of the things we asked for on our wedding registry.
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@anotherusername said in The Cooking Thread:
Also, while it's wonderful when it's hot from the oven, I've never had fresh bread that kept tolerably well; it becomes extremely crumbly.
Same for me. I've read that it's essentially due to kneading properly being actually much harder than just... kneading. Also, proper bread flour isn't necessarily what you can buy yourself easily at the shop (gluten levels etc.).
Out of curiosity, I found this page (in French) that gives a few details on how professional bakers do it, and it's definitely more than just wacking stuff together (they list several kneading techniques that differ mostly by the time/speed of kneading, and that apparently lead to vastly different results!).
But it's been years since I last did bread myself, that is one of the perks of living in a place where there is at least one traditional baker per village! :-P
Also, traditional bread doesn't use any kind of fat (oil or butter), so I guess you can't expect the same result with different ingredients?
