:baby_symbol: Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit
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@djls45 said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
@sockpuppet7 My wife said essentially the same thing. Maybe he's leaning towards autism without quite reaching the level of official diagnosis?
FWIW, I took one of those online tests out of curiosity, and the line for autism was set at 30 (I forget what the maximum was - it seems it was either 60 or 100), and I scored a 29.
I get the grayzone on these tests too, but doctors diagnosed me with ADHD that shares a few symptoms. And depression
I learned about a lot of similar, less common, disorders. it's worth talking to a doctor. Undiagnosed disorders are like living your life on hard mode, and some of them are treatable with some 💊
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@sockpuppet7 said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
I dunno how to say that in english without being offensive.
When has that ever stopped anyone here?
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Given that this isn't the ...
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@sockpuppet7 We all suffer from something or the other. Often multiple somethings or others. Diagnosis is for when it's a notable enough deviation from societal average that someone should probably take note. Or that's what it used to mean. but that was back when people's spare time went toward securing food instead of introspection.
As for the pills, do be very careful. All of them have side-effects. And those side effects are not always small. Violent homicidal and suicidal thoughts, for example, are a relatively frequently encountered side-effect of anti-depressants. The brain - and human biochemistry overall - is a complex and not very well understood apparatus.
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@acrow One side effect of depression meds is ... depression.
Yeah, I think (biblical) counseling is a far more effective treatment.
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@acrow said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
Violent homicidal and suicidal thoughts, for example, are a relatively frequently encountered side-effect of anti-depressants.
Source?
Because while there are cases of anti-depressants backfiring on adolescents that already had suicidal thoughts - by giving them just enough energy to actually do it - it's not "relatively frequent". (And I don't remember reading anything about them making people homicidal, either.)
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@Zerosquare There was more discussion on this, but it was in .
...I do admit that I may have conflated antidepressants and hormonal treatments for the "homicidal" part. A quick googling didn't turn up anything for antidepressants specifically, garage-worthy or otherwise.
As for the suicidal part, it's not just the pills giving them energy. I hear people taking antidepressants describe their changes in terms that are ...not very encouraging. Yes, this is anecdotal. In any case, the patients seem to become... how do I translate this, "dry of emotion"? They stop feeling joy. Start feeling "paper thin", as one said.
See e.g.: https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/talking-therapies-medicine-treatments/medicines-and-psychiatry/antidepressants/side-effects/
Under common side-effects of SSRIs: "Agitation", "anxiety", "insomnia"...Also, if you think about it logically, using antidepressants for any prolonged period of time will work beneficially if and only if the root of their depression was chemical. If it was not, and they were unhappy due to their circumstances, then it's like popping painkillers without fixing the injury. Worse, the body's chemical reactions were meant for coping with the root cause, there are several, and the pill only affects some of them.
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@acrow said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
Under common side-effects of SSRIs: "Agitation", "anxiety", "insomnia"...
Yes. The thing is, those are also common symptoms of depression itself. So it's hard to tell what are "true" side-effects of the meds, and what's just the meds being ineffective at treating the underlying condition.
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@Zerosquare True. However, the difference between the pill "causing" or "allowing" them is a bit moot. If the underlying cause brought these symptoms, but is not managed, then taking the pill that does not address them and moving on is bound to make them worse.
Of course, the usual solution is to treat these conditions with their own pills. And those have their own side-effects...
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@djls45 said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
@acrow One side effect of depression meds is ... depression.
Yeah, I think (biblical) counseling is a far more effective treatment.
On severe ADHD like mine, there is no therapy or counseling that helps, it's a chemical problem in the brain, and controlling it with pure will-force is exausthing. The depression and anxiety part have a good chance of having external causes, but I don't think can handle it with just therapy too at the moment. The recent waterworld-like event (see the weather thread if you dont know what I mean) just being the last on a sequence of stressful things happening
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@sockpuppet7 Humans just weren't meant for the mold that this day and age is trying to squeeze them into. ...Have you ever had the chance to take a vacation in, like, a cabin in the woods? A healthy 4 weeks without internet or electronic entertainment?
I'm not saying you need to turn into a hermit, but I notice a lot of people get a lot happier when they get away from the collective mass panic for a moment. Usually helps all their assorted neuro-chemical issues too. Which, no, doesn't make sense according to the doctors. But it's almost like humans were made to live in symbiosis with not-a-concrete-jungle...
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@acrow said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
Which, no, doesn't make sense according to the doctors.
I'm not sure which kind of doctors you have in mind, but I'm pretty sure all the ones I know would agree that taking a vacation and spending some time walking in a forest or so is beneficial.
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@Zerosquare The kind of doctor that decides on national treatment policies. Which in Finland ties the hands of both public and private practice. Sure, most general practitioners would agree that nature is good for you. If you ask them. But it's not officially recognized. And I don't see doctors bringing it up unless you specifically ask them. So if you go in with the midset of "the doctor will tell you what to do", chances are you'll walk out with a prescription for pills.
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I didn't know it worked that way for you folks. That sucks.
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@acrow said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
A healthy 4 weeks without internet or electronic entertainment?
what kind of torture are you trying to inflict on me? did I harm you that badly?
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@sockpuppet7 said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
did I harm you that badly?
it touched him in the nono-place
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@Zerosquare said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
@djls45 said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
I scored a 29.
Don't be sad, you're almost there. If you study a bit, you'll pass easily next time!
Or spend a bit more time on the forum!
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@acrow said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
Have you ever had the chance to take a vacation in, like, a cabin in the woods? A healthy 4 weeks without internet or electronic entertainment?
A dream of mine is to rent a house in the middle of nowhere for a week and just spend it polishing rocks in silence. Something always scuffers it.
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@DogsB said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
just spend it polishing rocks in silence
I can't help but think this is a euphemism but I'm not going to think about it too much.
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@Zecc said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
@DogsB said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
just spend it polishing rocks in silence
I can't help but think this is a euphemism but I'm not going to think about it too much.
I had a rock tumbler growing up. Used it a few times. "Silence" was not what it was good at.
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@djls45 said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
Or if you can open up the toy, put the tape on the inside of the speaker holes.
I have done this before.
Tangentially related, I have a cousin who recently had a child of his own after buying my children super noisy and annoying toys over the years and I briefly considered opening up gifts that we buy to give to his child in order to see if I can easily modify the circuitry to be louder. So far I have resisted the urge but we will see what happens in the future.
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@HardwareGeek said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
@sockpuppet7 said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
I dunno how to say that in english without being offensive.
When has that ever stopped anyone here?
It has never stopped me. I frequently stop to consider my words before I speak to see if there are more offensive ways to say it.
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@Polygeekery said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
I frequently stop to consider my words before I speak
to see if there are more offensive ways to say it.
:drake_nods_in_approval:
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@Zerosquare said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
Because while there are cases of anti-depressants backfiring on adolescents that already had suicidal thoughts - by giving them just enough energy to actually do it - it's not "relatively frequent". (And I don't remember reading anything about them making people homicidal, either.)
"Relatively frequent" is a very subjective measure.
In my experience with others, and this is absolutely purely anecdotal and I will admit that, it seems like antidepressants can sometimes help with the depression while simultaneously bringing other poor personality traits to the surface.
One example is an acquaintance (long story) that was a subpar spouse and then he went on antidepressants and became an absolute monster. This is not the only personal bit of anecdata, but it is the one that stands out the most in my mind.
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@acrow said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
In any case, the patients seem to become... how do I translate this, "dry of emotion"? They stop feeling joy. Start feeling "paper thin", as one said.
I have heard this from several people who went on antidepressants and I've noticed the change in others. It seems to be somewhat common.
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This morning I was driving the kids to camp and they are both just staring out the car window, both obviously only barely awake. I ask:
"Do either of you see anything interesting out of your window?"
My oldest is being somewhat dry and sarcastic:
"A bank."
I bet he thought that I wouldn't have anything interesting to say about that.
"In the 1920's and 1930's there was a bank robber named Willie Sutton. He was once interviewed by a journalist who asked him why he robbed banks. Willie simply stated, 'Because that's where the money is'."
They thought that was absolutely hilarious and we spent the next few minutes discussing more about Willie Sutton (he was a really interesting person) and how simple, straightforward and to the point that answer was.
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@Polygeekery said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
@djls45 said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
Or if you can open up the toy, put the tape on the inside of the speaker holes.
I have done this before.
Tangentially related, I have a cousin who recently had a child of his own after buying my children super noisy and annoying toys over the years and I briefly considered opening up gifts that we buy to give to his child in order to see if I can easily modify the circuitry to be louder. So far I have resisted the urge but we will see what happens in the future.
If you're not feeling particularly enthusiastic for the project, an easy way to increase the volume of the toys would be to provide some super heavy-duty batteries along with them. Something that definitely won't have its voltage sag under load. Toys tend to drive their speaker with the battery voltage, because regulators cost money. So if you can keep the battery voltage at 1.55v for a few hours...
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@acrow said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
If you're not feeling particularly enthusiastic for the project, an easy way to increase the volume of the toys would be to provide some super heavy-duty batteries along with them. Something that definitely won't have its voltage sag under load. Toys tend to drive their speaker with the battery voltage, because regulators cost money. So if you can keep the battery voltage at 1.55v for a few hours...
I'll take it to that other thread we were arguing about what things are evil :-P
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@Polygeekery said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
This morning I was driving the kids to camp and they are both just staring out the car window, both obviously only barely awake. I ask:
"Do either of you see anything interesting out of your window?"
My oldest is being somewhat dry and sarcastic:
"A bank."
I bet he thought that I wouldn't have anything interesting to say about that.
"In the 1920's and 1930's there was a bank robber named Willie Sutton. He was once interviewed by a journalist who asked him why he robbed banks. Willie simply stated, 'Because that's where the money is'."
They thought that was absolutely hilarious and we spent the next few minutes discussing more about Willie Sutton (he was a really interesting person) and how simple, straightforward and to the point that answer was.
Ever since this, every single person that comes to our house gets asked the same question by Lil'Dude:
"Do you know why Willie Sutton robbed banks?"
When the person says no:
"Because that's where the money is."
Followed by raucous giggling. I've either stoked his appreciation of history or started him down the path to being a smartass bank robber. Flip a coin.
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I don't know about the bank robbing part, but you've definitely started him down the path to being a smartass, a long time ago.
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@Zerosquare my kids have wicked sharp senses of humor.
I mean, don't get me wrong, some shit goes way over their head like Stevie Wonder jokes. Other times they come up with some insanely hilarious stuff.
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@Polygeekery said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
some shit goes way over their head like Stevie Wonder jokes.
They just don't see those coming.
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@Polygeekery said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
I've either stoked his appreciation of history or started him down the path to being a smartass bank robber. Flip a coin.
He may become a museum robber.
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@Polygeekery said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
@djls45 said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
Or if you can open up the toy, put the tape on the inside of the speaker holes.
I have done this before.
Tangentially related, I have a cousin who recently had a child of his own after buying my children super noisy and annoying toys over the years and I briefly considered opening up gifts that we buy to give to his child in order to see if I can easily modify the circuitry to be louder. So far I have resisted the urge but we will see what happens in the future.
It would be really easy to bypass volume controls. Either scratch out a trace or bodge a wire onto a potentiometer.
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@Polygeekery said in Parenting advice - you're gonna get hit:
@Zerosquare my kids have wicked sharp senses of humor.
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@Zerosquare I'll flag you for doxing polykids
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@Zerosquare kid's playing quietly and not getting in anyone's way. He's not even hogging the swingset; there's an available swing right next to him. What's the problem?
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Who do you think lit that fire?
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@Polygeekery At least it's not "respawn point".
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