The Official Funny Stuff Thread™
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See? It worked!
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"The hardest hit school was Thorncliffe Park Public School, where only about 130 children showed up for class out of the usual 1,350"
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Hasn't it been proven that kids are much better at sex if they have no guidance on the subject?
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Hasn't it been proven that kids are much better at sex if they have no guidance on the subject?
You think first grade is the time to start teaching them that? I don't. You think they should be hearing about things like fisting and anal in 3rd grade? I don't know that this district was planning that, but I know others have.
I think I didn't learn about sex until I was about 11, and I managed not to have kids until well after I got married.
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Yeah, but that's because your'e a white guy who wants nothing more than to perpetuate the heteropatricarchy.
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I'd wager my babies' momma shopped that Fiesta Mart
Houston, TX, if anyone cares. Yes, real address of real store.
Filed under: I can't be the only one who checked that.
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IJIJ "If you do it again I will have to buy you another Delicious Frozen Treat™ ... "
S2:
IJIJ: "Says here your grade is 110% ..."
S2: ... "Did you say... another?"
Cool. I wish I could do that with my kids, but they're both in college now, so I don't get to know what their grades are unless they choose to tell me.
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3rd grade?
3rd grade is about 15-year-old isn't it? I'm assuming 6th is when they finish school at 18, or is there some Disconumeration going on?
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Cool. I wish I could do that with my kids,
Well I do enjoy buying DFT™s with and for them....
... but really, we get four report cards a year. And interims, so you're not surprised by the report card.... and now, I guess, daily grades. It's a keeping up with the Jones thing, that parent is leaning over Johnny's shoulder making sure everything is up to snuff, so now I have to check at least every other day. Spawn had a 60% in that class the last time I checked...
"Nooo Mighty Father, I swear!!, the work was duly submitted to the schoolmaster, I swear!! On your grave!!"...
Yep, the work was apparently duly submitted....
But this could be its own thread for us onion-belters.
For goodness' how have we gotten along this long without an onion emoji?
The shame:
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3rd grade is about 15-year-old isn't it? I'm assuming 6th is when they finish school at 18, or is there some Disconumeration going on?
Around 8 years old in US-ian grades.
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Yeah, but that's because your'e a white guy who wants nothing more than to perpetuate the heteropatricarchy.
If I wanted to do that I would be in favor of telling people how to breed, duh.
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3rd grade is about 15-year-old isn't it? I'm assuming 6th is when they finish school at 18, or is there some Disconumeration going on?
In the US, first grade is 5-6 years old; high school graduation is 12th grade, or 17-18.
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Well in that case then, yes, 9 years old is probably too young to be learning about fisting in school.
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TIL,
I guess?Ah... it "bakes", is that what you kids call that?... after I post and doesn't show in preview. MEGA-TIL
- what's the opposite of a whippersnapper? Apparently that's me.
B) "Onion" is one of those words that looks mighty peculiar when written down. (at least between colons)
- what's the opposite of a whippersnapper? Apparently that's me.
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Ah... it "bakes", is that what you kids call that?.
Sort of. If you're on Windows, you need to reboot to get the updates. Other OSes usually just require you to refresh the page.
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@ijij said:
Ah... it "bakes", is that what you kids call that?.
Sort of. If you're on Windows, you need to reboot to get the updates. Other OSes usually just require you to refresh the page.
EDIT-EDIT: and if I include this: BEFORE I use the dang thing.
Unless you're completely trolling me (if so, it's working), I just posted and it showed up in the post after a second or two. Still doesn't show in preview ( ) or the emoji-picker
EDIT: and if I include this:
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Now we just need :belt:...
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@ijij said:
Unless you're completely trolling me
I dunno...are you on windows?
After I got tired of feeding punch-cards into the reader, what OS would I have gone to? ;)
Yes IE on Windows.
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I'm not sure if i like this one enough
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... but really, we get four report cards a year. And interims, so you're not surprised by the report card.... and now, I guess, daily grades. It's a keeping up with the Jones thing, that parent is leaning over Johnny's shoulder making sure everything is up to snuff, so now I have to check at least every other day. Spawn had a 60% in that class the last time I checked...
Home schooling makes keeping track of grades so much easier.
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@tar said:
3rd grade is about 15-year-old isn't it? I'm assuming 6th is when they finish school at 18, or is there some Disconumeration going on?
In the US, first grade is
5-66-7 years old; high school graduation is 12th grade, or 17-18.Kindergarten, which comes before first grade, is for kids who are 5-6.
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@ijij said:
Ah... it "bakes", is that what you kids call that?.
Sort of. If you're on Windows, you need to reboot to get the updates. Other OSes usually just require you to refresh the page.
No reboot (or page refresh) required. ;)
INB4 whoosh flags. I must defend Windows from this joke!
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Kindergarten, which comes before first grade, is for kids who are 5-6.
Due to birth dates vs. enrollment cut-off, skipping grades, being held back for academic or social reasons, etc., ages may vary a year or so in either direction, so the original statement isn't really wrong. I was 5 at the start of my first-grade year and 6 at the end; it's possible — although perhaps less common — to be off a year in the other direction, too.
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When you upgrade to a better OS.
Rly? I :hand: that on a , with and that's your best
My brain can contain but one OS...
(and enuf *nix to get by)EDIT/ADDENDUM:
COB:
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i proposed it in that post you quoted. @boomzilla liked it and added it.
here's a belt:i can't shop 'em now.
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i proposed it in that post you quoted. @boomzilla liked it and added it.
here's a belt:i can't shop 'em now.
Actually I quoted your previous post, where you put the onion in, not the belt post. But I was thinking we need an emoji that specifically has an onion on a belt, rather than having to do this: :belt:
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Wait, that didn't work. I guess Boomzilla needs to reboot.
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yep, we need a onion on a belt emoji. that's why i brought the belt here. maybe someone will shop it. if not, i will do once i get home
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Due to birth dates vs. enrollment cut-off, skipping grades, being held back for academic or social reasons, etc., ages may vary a year or so in either direction, so the original statement isn't really wrong.
I was correcting it to reflect the general condition. The general condition is that kids are 6 when starting first grade and 7 when finishing.
I was 5 at the start of my first-grade year and 6 at the end; it's possible — although perhaps less common — to be off a year in the other direction, too.
So you skipped kindergarten or started early. Good for you?
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Someone wants to do a better job, they're welcome to, but here's a start.
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I was correcting it to reflect the general condition. The general condition is that kids are 6 when starting first grade and 7 when finishing.
I Arizona, maybe. Not in California nor Virginia nor Maryland. Probably others, too, but I have knowledge of school ages for those 3 states.
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Someone wants to do a better job, they're welcome to, but here's a start.
Yeah, I didn't add the belt, because @Jarry said he wasn't too happy with it. Though it doesn't follow the original meme, it might be better with the onion "wearing" the belt?
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It was a yellow onion.
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Nickels had a picture of a bee on them.
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I Arizona, maybe.
You are, maybe? That might be something worth figuring out.
@abarker said:
I was correcting it to reflect the general condition. The general condition is that kids are 6 when starting first grade and 7 when finishing.
I Arizona, maybe. Not in California nor Virginia nor Maryland. Probably others, too, but I have knowledge of school ages for those 3 states.
In Arizona, Utah, and Washington (those are the ones I have first or second hand knowledge of) the ages I listed are correct.
As for the states you listed:
- Caliornia: Looks like you are out of date:
- https://votesmart.org/bill/12033/32038/increasing-age-requirements-for-kindergarten-and-first-grade#.VfsPa99VhBc
- Details SB 1381 from 2010 that incrementally changed the first grade age requirement from 6 by Dec 2 of the school year to 6 by September 1 of the school year. Currently fully implemented.
- https://votesmart.org/bill/12033/32038/increasing-age-requirements-for-kindergarten-and-first-grade#.VfsPa99VhBc
- Virginia: Couldn't find anything about first grade, but I did find the below page about kindergarten. The relevant data for first grade can be extrapolated from there.
- http://www.doe.virginia.gov/students_parents/student_enrollment.shtml
- Virginia Department of Education requires that kids be 5 by September 30 of school year. There don't appear to be any conditions for making exceptions, so the majority of students will be 5 when they start school.
- http://www.doe.virginia.gov/students_parents/student_enrollment.shtml
- Maryland: Again, I couldn't find anything about first grade, but I did find the below page about kindergarten.
- http://marylandpublicschools.org/NR/rdonlyres/841ABD3D-FC95-47AB-BB74-BD3C85A1EFB8/30959/FS36_12_2011_.pdf
- Kids are required to attend full day kindergarten if they are 5 by September 1 of the school year.
- http://marylandpublicschools.org/NR/rdonlyres/841ABD3D-FC95-47AB-BB74-BD3C85A1EFB8/30959/FS36_12_2011_.pdf
Looks like your information is outdated. Also, Age to Start Kindergarten By State indicates that almost every state has a 5 years of age requirement for kindergarten, and those that don't leave it up to the school districts.
You'll have to try harder, old man.
- Caliornia: Looks like you are out of date:
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Though it doesn't follow the original meme, it might be better with the onion "wearing" the belt?
That's beyond my 'shopping (by which I mean MS Paint) skills, though.
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You'll have to try harder, old man.
Huh...must be an off by one error here. I think I had kindergarten in mind where you talked about first grade.
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