Stack Overflow: Is the Starbucks menu Turing Complete? (Spoiler Warning: It isn't)
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To save you a click, here's what they're asking about:
<img src="http://www.dubberly.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/12/starbucks_platform-440x330.jpg"
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(Spoiler Warning: It isn't)
Who knew?
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Also, I clicked through SO to the source material and I have honestly no idea:
- what the hell I just read
- if it is supposed to be a parody or not
With so many options, how many variations are possible? With only one syrup the Starbucks latte framework offers almost 200 million variations. Add a second syrup and there are over 1.3 billion—enough for each Chinese citizen to have his or her own personal drink.
How do customers cope with so many options? Consider this story: A new customer enters a Starbucks store. She stands in line behind another customer and hears him order: “I’ll have a Grande Non-fat Latte.” The barista taking his order repeats the order “Grande Non-fat Latte.” When the drink is ready another barista calls out the drink again “Grande Non-fat Latte.”o_0
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Now that's what I call a SAT.
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Each order is repeated three times. Repetition supports the learning process. Over time, the customer learns new options from the baristas, from other customers, and from her friends. She may learn Barista-speak and the underlying framework for designing drinks, but not all at once.
[...]
The process of learning Barista-speak is a carefully designed journey. New customers may have no concept of the drink framework or ordering language but that does not prevent them from ordering. They can order from the menu or get guidance form the barista.
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There's a pdf.
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Urgh. Every time I go to Starbucks I ask for a "regular filter coffee".
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IIRC, we had our first fight when my partner tried to take me to a starbucks (I could have just said “no thanks”, I didn't need to be all “god, even the smell of that place makes me feel nauseous” about it).
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I've never gone to a Starbucks and at this point I'm too afraid to try.
"Hello sir what will it be?"
"Huh.. one coffee please..."
"Espresso, Latte or Cappuccino?"
"Yes"
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Me, if I have to buy a coffee in the morning (as opposed to making it myself):
"Coffee."
"Regular, large, ..."
"Coffee!"
"I'll just get you a large, ok?"
"COFFEE!"
"Thank you. Here's your change. Have a nice day."
"Coffee."
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That was a bit of an overreaction... from both sides.
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What is this? Coffee Ball Z?
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Either very old people or very young people, say the following making in impression of a old grandad or a teenage girl:
"Oh my god, there is a bunch of options. It is SO HARD to choose. It mush be like a computer language or something."
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Every time I go to Starbucks I ask for a "regular filter coffee".
Say "drip" (or "pike," if you want the standard blend) or you sound like a wanker. #SeattleTips
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"Coffee. Black as my soul."
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So the choice is between "sounding like a wanker" to a Starbucks barista vs knowing in your heart of hearts that you're definitely a wanker for knowing those Starbucks terms.
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In this area, Starbucks is the default choice. It'd be like going to Canada and not knowing how to order from the Tim Horton's menu.
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If you order a "large coffee with two cream, two sugar" instead of a "large double-double," I don't think you'd be judged.
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Not overtly.
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I, for one, would love to be the first person to introduce a coffee menu with infinite recursion and conditional branches.
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I've never gone to a Starbucks and at this point I'm too afraid to try.
I've been inside once, with someone else who ordered. Had a friend in college who used to look in and yell, "Suckers!" every time we walked by one. I often think fondly of his opinion on this subject.
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Had a friend in college who used to look in and yell, "Suckers!" every time we walked by one.
Dignified.
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The process of learning Barista-speak is a carefully designed journey.
I think this either explains or is explained by the Masters in Fine Arts prerequisite for employment as a barista.
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Dignified.
Indeed. He was in ROTC and went into the Army. We refer to him as "The Bad Lieutenant."
He wasn't that bad. But if anyone was interesting in dignity they wouldn't be hanging around a Starbucks.
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Whatever happened to just ordering an coffee?
Having said that, iced coffee is pretty sweet…
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Urgh. Every time I go to Starbucks I ask for a "regular filter coffee".
When I go to a Starbucks (because I've missed a train in the morning, so usually only once every few weeks) I ask for a “small filter coffee”. It's one of the cheapest things on the menu, and is still huge, and gives a massive caffeine hit. Also, at that point the equipment is still clean and they're serving a lot, so the coffee doesn't taste burnt. Burnt coffee is nasty.
Their espressos (and hence all the drinks based off them) aren't very good, though the mochas add so much other stuff that they cover that problem up.
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Ok, I thought there could be some kind of a pun to be made there, or a jaws reference or something, but I couldn't think of anything worth saying and google wasn't any help so here's a random bar-chart.
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Bigger boobs = more spending power? Not exactly a revelation there. ;-)
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Exponential?
I… whu?I mean, why does bigger boobs correlate with more spending power?
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You just convinced me to go get implants.
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No, seriously, I don't get the correlation
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No, seriously, I don't get the correlation
You must be new here.
And by here, I mean the planet.
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^ What he said!
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You must be new here.
And by here, I mean the planet.
I'm… gonna go check that PM I just received…
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I'm… gonna go check that PM I just received…
There's a reason that "gentleman's clubs" are a thing. ;)
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Not sure if that is like a or a "hide me from the world" sort of gif. All I do know is that your gif should be in HD and preferably around 400MB or so...
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It works for both I think
I found it on a page that also had a cat image captioned 'headblanket/cos headdesk hurts'
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Also, at that point the equipment is still clean and they're serving a lot, so the coffee doesn't taste burnt.
AHA!
That's always been my issue with their coffee...
"The More You Know..."
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https://qzprod.files.wordpress.com/2014/11/bra-sizes-and-online-spending-power-low-slightly-low-middle-slightly-high-high_chartbuilder.png?w=640
I wonder if the next image will be NSFW or the one after that.
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I wonder if the next image will be NSFW or the one after that.
Hey, don't tempt me like that, or I might do this:
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Now, there's only one option.