I hate printers, with a passion
-
On a family support call. Mom needs to print a two page text document but the printer doesn't work correctly. She prints something like once a year, so the stupid cartridges are always dried out.
Knowing this, I try to print the document and see what I expected, white stripes everywhere. So I go to the tool thingy and select the option to clean the printing heads. Back to the document and print again. I get this lovely dialog:
Oh yes, of course it can't fucking print a black and white document anymore because the fucking CYAN is empty. (It's always cyan, isn't it?!)
And to add instult to injury:
- There's a huge FUCKING TEXTBOX that tells you to click there for offers to buy ink.
- A yellow button to buy ink
- A
buttonhyperlink styled button that says "print this window".
Ignoring for a second that this dialog is shown in the first place because it refuses to print a b/w document for lack of cyan, I am sure as hell not goint to print this obscenely colorful, dumb as fuck window just so I know the serial number for the cyan cartridge is "T0892". Are you fucking kidding me!?
I don't even need cyan ink, it's only empty because of their fucking head cleaning utility, and now you want me to waste even more of it to print this asshole of a window.I put in a replacement cartridge of cyan ink and print the document. It's still got some stripes in it, even though fewer this time. Another round of printer head cleaning and I can finally print the document in acceptable condition. Of course now the cyan is (from what it seems like by this informative image) back to 80% and yellow is getting dangerously close to being empty. So I bet it'll pull the same stunt next time there's anything to print.
The real solution here would of course be a copy shop and pay 20 cents, but there's no such thing in this little village within any reasonable distance.
-
Also, when I got the cyan cartridge out I could literally hear that there was still ink in it. So I tried to just put the same one in at first, but the printer wasn't to be fooled and firmly stated it's empty.
Well, this is how much blue ink I got to dribble out of the empty cartridge:
Printer manufactures are literally scum, somewhere below Goldman Sachs bankers and maybe slightly above African dictators.
-
Here's a fun video to share with everyone even if you both already know everything in it:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AHX6tHdQGiQ
-
@lb_ Yes, I know all that, maybe except the part where he alluded you can reset the chip with a simple pin. Not sure how that works, I should have definitely tried that, as quite obviously it was still half full.
He starts with "this is like the 5th one I bought this week (that's an exaggeration)" and then comes this.
This is literally true, no exaggeration."Did you know that most printers nix a little cyan in every black and white document you print?"
It's. Always. Cyan.
Well, and the yellow dots thing to spy on you, but that's a different issue.While not really new, the video is 100% true and well worth watching.
-
I am quite glad I can print the 1-2 pages per year I need privately at the office.
-
@pleegwat That's exactly what I do, I haven't owned a printer in a decade.
The printer at work is like one cubic meter in volume and fucking expensive, but it's got a support contract and works. Also, the amortized cost per printed page is definitely way lower than paying for this garbage when you just print once a year.
-
FUCK printers. I was looking at reviews and suggestions for printers a while ago and I think it's very telling that every time, the highest-rated suggestion was to buy an old business/office printer. There's no escaping the amount of bullshit these companies try to sneak into their products.
-
If I had a gun with two bullets and was in a room with Hitler, Bin Laden, and HP, I would shoot HP twice
-
-
@bb36e aren't the laser based ones better?
-
@sockpuppet7 Yup. I bought a black and white laser printer years ago, it's always worked and I'm still on the original toner that came with it. It even has fancy features like wireless and two-sided printing.
-
@topspin said in I hate printers, with a passion:
She prints something like once a year, so the stupid cartridges are always dried out.
Then you did a great disservice by recommending an ink jet instead of a laser printer.
It's not like any of these problems are new, people have been complaining about ink jet printers for literally decades at this point. I mean, guess what? If you're a cheap motherfucker who only wants to spent $47.99 on your printer, you're going to get a really shitty printer.
-
This printer bullshit was the reason I didn't support carly fiorina in the primary.
-
@topspin said in I hate printers, with a passion:
On a family support call. Mom needs to print a two page text document but the printer doesn't work correctly. She prints something like once a year, so the stupid cartridges are always dried out.
I don't know where you or your mom live, but surely there's some shop within 5 miles where she can print her stuff, isn't there? At her printing rate it's much cheaper than buying a printer. And if she already has printer, it's cheaper than cartridge.
-
I gave up after buying 2 printers.
It's cheaper just to go to kinkos and have them print it. No matter how much you'd think it would be cheaper to do at home.
-
@blakeyrat said in I hate printers, with a passion:
I mean, guess what? If you're a cheap motherfucker who only wants to spent $47.99 on your printer, you're going to get a really shitty printer.
I've got a brand new printer/scanner for half that (tax included) (bought in USA with US dollars, just to be clear). After almost a year, I've only changed ink once - I don't print a lot, but a lot more than OP's mom. So even including bizarre cartridge prices, I still think it was the best option. Expensive things are only worth it if they have demonstrably better quality (not an option for a printer with my subpar eyesight) or if they save money in the long run.
-
@gąska Maybe read the part where I explicitly wrote that there is no such shop anywhere close.
-
@topspin said in I hate printers, with a passion:
@gąska Maybe read the part where I explicitly wrote that there is no such shop anywhere close.
What's close? Anything which takes less than half a day's drive might be close enough if you don't have to deal with printing bullshit.
-
@bb36e said in I hate printers, with a passion:
If I had a gun with two bullets and was in a room with Hitler, Bin Laden, and HP, I would shoot HP twice
Good choice. The other two are already definitely dead and HP… well, blood-sucking vampires could always do with a bit more shooting. Ask for silver for your ammunition.
-
@topspin said in I hate printers, with a passion:
@gąska Maybe read the part where I explicitly wrote that there is no such shop anywhere close.
I don't know where her village is located, but I'm pretty sure that going 20 miles to nearest town is still going to be cheaper than buying cartridge each time.
-
@topspin said in I hate printers, with a passion:
She prints something like once a year, so the stupid cartridges are always dried out.
I solved this problem by buying my parents a black and white-only laser printer. They've had it for five years, it still has the toner cartridge it came with in it, and they haven't had a single issue when they needed to print. Inkjet printers are a scam.
Obligatory links:
-
We have an inkjet multifunction printer that's worked well enough over the years. The last time I ran out of ink for it, however, HP had stopped making cartridges for it and the only ones I could get were off-brand ones. As was typical of such cartridges back when I sold them at an office store, now my printer can't reliably print color and will probably cease to be useful when the black runs out. I'd like to get a color laser to replace it, but don't have enough need at the moment.
I miss my old LaserJet 4SiMX, which served me well for a decade after being some office's workhorse for over a million pages.
-
@jbert said in I hate printers, with a passion:
What's close? Anything which takes less than half a day's drive might be close enough if you don't have to deal with printing bullshit.
More like an hour or something. Half a day's drive is reasonably expensive.
It would almost make sense to have a mail order service for this, that'd definitely be cheaper than printing. Also, I'm still puzzled myself about why there's no closer copy shop.@gąska Fortunately I didn't actually have to buy a cartridge, the replacement was a spare. I did briefly wonder if putting in a wrong color would've worked too otherwise, since it's b/w anyway. But I think the chip would've recognized that.
-
@blakeyrat said in I hate printers, with a passion:
Then you did a great disservice by recommending an ink jet instead of a laser printer.
It's not like any of these problems are new, people have been complaining about ink jet printers for literally decades at this point. I mean, guess what? If you're a cheap motherfucker who only wants to spent $47.99 on your printer, you're going to get a really shitty printer.
It's not like the printer is new. I don't remember exactly but it's been a few years, and getting a laser wasn't very affordable back then. I don't even remember if I "recommended" anything at all about it.
Also it wasn't exactly the very cheapest option, at least it has distinct cartridges for color unlike combined ones. But it's still just as much of a piece of shit as every inkjet.
-
@hungrier said in I hate printers, with a passion:
@sockpuppet7 Yup. I bought a black and white laser printer years ago, it's always worked and I'm still on the original toner that came with it. It even has fancy features like wireless and two-sided printing.
Me too. I may have changed the toner once or twice. Also I was in staples recently and they said there's a new type of ink that you can buy and it doesn't dry out - will last 2 years, if you wanted a color printer.
I'm not quite sure which one he was talking about, and can't seem to find any references online either.
Wired seems to give the ecotank a good review, assuming you want to print in color.
Finally, a Printer That Ends the Nightmare of Ink Refills
The way the EcoTanks work is so delightfully simple, it’s almost as if the prevailing cartridge system exists solely to disadvantage the average consumer.
-
@topspin said in I hate printers, with a passion:
@blakeyrat said in I hate printers, with a passion:
Then you did a great disservice by recommending an ink jet instead of a laser printer.
It's not like any of these problems are new, people have been complaining about ink jet printers for literally decades at this point. I mean, guess what? If you're a cheap motherfucker who only wants to spent $47.99 on your printer, you're going to get a really shitty printer.
It's not like the printer is new. I don't remember exactly but it's been a few years, and getting a laser wasn't very affordable back then. I don't even remember if I "recommended" anything at all about it.
Also it wasn't exactly the very cheapest option, at least it has distinct cartridges for color unlike combined ones. But it's still just as much of a piece of shit as every inkjet.Not sure how much the laser is in germany, but I got mine for under $100, probably around $50.
In fact if you're ok with USB only, there's one on sale right now for $60
Brother HL-L2320D Black and White Laser Printer, Single-Function, Print | Staples
Get Brother HL-L2320D Black and White Laser Printer, Single-Function, Print fast at Staples. Free next-Day shipping. No order minimum.
If you want networked, it's $100 right now, but I'm sure you can find it cheaper on sale.
Get Brother HL-L2370DW Wireless Laser Printer, Single-Function, Print fast at Staples. Free next-Day shipping. No order minimum.
This one is $109 on amazon, has wireless. Generic refills are dirt cheap too, although if she only prints once a year, you're likely to upgrade to a version of windows that doesn't have a compatible driver anymore before you need another toner.
$26 for the high yield. Looks like they chip now and you would need to move the chip over from the previous cartridge.
-
@topspin said in I hate printers, with a passion:
Oh yes, of course it can't fucking print a black and white document anymore because the fucking CYAN is empty. (It's always cyan, isn't it?!)
Hahahahaha. This is why I switched to HP.
In case you wanted to get more pissed off: If black ink runs out, do you think the printer stops working? Nope. It asks you if you want to enable 'composite black', meaning it'll mix the other inks together to create black, at the cost of running out of ink quicker. Think on that. It can invent black ink out of thin air, but refuses to print black and white unless it's got the colors.
-
@topspin said in I hate printers, with a passion:
Also, I'm still puzzled myself about why there's no closer copy shop.
Would going to the local library work? Over here you can copy/print things at probably any local library.
-
@pie_flavor said in I hate printers, with a passion:
In case you wanted to get more pissed off: If black ink runs out, do you think the printer stops working? Nope. It asks you if you want to enable 'composite black',
Yes, I've seen something like that 20 years ago, it felt entirely obvious to have that.
It can invent black ink out of thin air, but refuses to print black and white unless it's got the colors.
Wait, are you saying that's the same models? The same fucker can print b/w with colors only, but no b/w with full black and empty colors? Good lord, someone burn their fucking house down.
-
@topspin said in I hate printers, with a passion:
Good lord, someone burn their fucking house down.
paging @Polygeekery
-
@erufael said in I hate printers, with a passion:
@topspin said in I hate printers, with a passion:
Also, I'm still puzzled myself about why there's no closer copy shop.
Would going to the local library work? Over here you can copy/print things at probably any local library.
I need to check that out. I googled for quite a bit and didn't find anything, but I also was in an agitated mood and the results gave shitty non-answer websites which pissed me off even more.
Really, there should be some way somewhere, library could work. Thanks!
-
@pie_flavor said in I hate printers, with a passion:
@topspin said in I hate printers, with a passion:
Oh yes, of course it can't fucking print a black and white document anymore because the fucking CYAN is empty. (It's always cyan, isn't it?!)
Hahahahaha. This is why I switched to HP.
In case you wanted to get more pissed off: If black ink runs out, do you think the printer stops working? Nope. It asks you if you want to enable 'composite black', meaning it'll mix the other inks together to create black, at the cost of running out of ink quicker. Think on that. It can invent black ink out of thin air, but refuses to print black and white unless it's got the colors.If you just want to print with black, can't you pick grayscale mode? I think that only uses the black cartridge.
-
@dangeruss said in I hate printers, with a passion:
you're likely to upgrade to a version of windows that doesn't have a compatible driver anymore before you need another toner.
That’s why you spend just a bit more and buy one that supports PS (or something compatible like Brother’s BR script). Then you can just switch to generic PS printing if you can’t get drivers anymore.
-
@parody said in I hate printers, with a passion:
I miss my old LaserJet 4SiMX, which served me well for a decade after being some office's workhorse for over a million pages.
Same. Well, it was a LaserJet III+ in my case, bought second hand when it was already 10–15 years old, and it worked for about ten years after for me too. I don’t remember what made me replace it eventually, but it must have stopped working else I’d still have it :)
-
@topspin Buy her a little B&W laser.
-
@weng but lasers can't be black or white!
-
@topspin said in I hate printers, with a passion:
@gąska Maybe read the part where I explicitly wrote that there is no such shop anywhere close.
In the USA, nearly every public library has one. Also most government service buildings.
-
@dangeruss said in I hate printers, with a passion:
In fact if you're ok with USB only, there's one on sale right now for $60
I love my Brother! My first one lasted about 10yrs (2040 I think?) - and I used that at many of the dog shows I traveled to (as secretary). That 1st one cost about 50 (the paper feed - where it pulls the paper in - finally wore out - still prints fine!). The replacement (2230) was about 70. Cartridges run about 50.
-
@parody said in I hate printers, with a passion:
We have an inkjet multifunction printer that's worked well enough over the years.
-
@pie_flavor said in I hate printers, with a passion:
It asks you if you want to enable '
compositesomething almost, but not quite, entirely unlike black',Seriously, there is a reason printers, and I mean people who print books and newspapers and junk mail, not just home and office computer printers, use CMYK, not just CMY. Without real black ink, it's maybe good enough for printing a hard copy of a government form to fill out, photograph on a wooden table and email to some bureaucrat (who will print it again and stick it in a file without reading it), but it will look terrible for anything where you actually care.
-
@gurth said in I hate printers, with a passion:
@parody said in I hate printers, with a passion:
I miss my old LaserJet 4SiMX, which served me well for a decade after being some office's workhorse for over a million pages.
Same. Well, it was a LaserJet III+ in my case, bought second hand when it was already 10–15 years old, and it worked for about ten years after for me too. I don’t remember what made me replace it eventually, but it must have stopped working else I’d still have it :)
Mine started eating sheets in a way that wrecked the toner cartridge, which is a lot of money to replace. I knew how to replace rollers and such and I did install a duplexer many years before it started failing, but any actual mechanical repairs were beyond my skills and those of anyone I knew. Plus it weighed a ton, so when I purged the house of old computers and CRTs it went as well.
@bb36e said in I hate printers, with a passion:
@parody said in I hate printers, with a passion:
We have an inkjet multifunction printer that's worked well enough over the years.
BS! meme image removed - ed
It can happen. I got it back around 2007 and it worked well up until the end of last year.
-
@blakeyrat said in I hate printers, with a passion:
It's not like any of these problems are new, people have been complaining about ink jet printers for literally decades at this point. I mean, guess what? If you're a cheap motherfucker who only wants to spent $47.99 on your printer, you're going to get a really shitty printer.
And typically machines get dirt cheap when they're manufactured for literally decades without any significant changes. $47.99 seems about right for the hardware part.
But no, it's the software that goes with them that sucks. Something as simple as a common printer should have been working flawlessly since the Vista days (come on, it's just sending some goddamn vector graphics one way plus some metadata the other way), but we all know software is on its own level when it comes to shittiness, and software made by hardware makers is on its own level after that, and then HP somehow manages to be even worse than everyone else at literally everything. It's the perfect storm of shittiness.
-
CMYK and black printing
There is something to it, but not in the way that makes much sense for home printing. In printing there's something called rich black, which involves adding some CMY to black areas to make them darker than just the black ink alone. However, for generic home print jobs it's completely unnecessary, and if you're like most people and get cheap printer paper, it'll likely just mess up the print.
-
@parody said in I hate printers, with a passion:
The last time I ran out of ink for it, however, HP had stopped making cartridges for it and the only ones I could get were off-brand ones. As was typical of such cartridges back when I sold them at an office store, now my printer can't reliably print color and will probably cease to be useful when the black runs out.
Not only off-brand cartridges will do that. I got bad batch of genuine Epson cartridges some years ago that wrecked that printer.
-
I'm actually content with the HP Instant Ink scheme. It means instead of variable costs per page I now have a fixed cost for each page, regardless of what I'm actually printing. Replacement cartridges arrive well before the supply runs empty.
They've got three tiers (50, 100 or 300 pages per month) with carry-over so if your monthly prints are roughly at those numbers it makes quite a bit of sense. Plus, you can change the plans from one month to the next or cancel whenever you want.
-
-
@hardwaregeek said in I hate printers, with a passion:
but it will look terrible for anything where you actually care.
The point was, I think, that it's pretty useful when you've run out of black and have color left over, since you very likely do not care. It's good enough for a few pages you urgently need printed.
-
@bb36e said in I hate printers, with a passion:
Thanks, Wikipedia...
Registration black: CMYK (100, 100, 100, 100)
Vanta black: CMYK (9001, 9001, 9001, 9001)
Filed under: I'll see myself out
-
@hungrier said in I hate printers, with a passion:
In printing there's something called rich black, which involves adding some CMY to black areas to make them darker than just the black ink alone
And the name lends itself to hilarious racial jokes!
-
@anonymous234 said in I hate printers, with a passion:
we all know software is on its own level when it comes to shittiness, and software made by hardware makers is on its own level after that
The level after that software made by hardware makers, ported to non-Windows platforms.
Why I Believe Printers Were Sent From Hell To Make Us Miserable
Amazon.com
