*What did the Zen master say to the hot-dog vendor?
Make me one with everything.*
Thank you, I'll be here all week.
*What did the Zen master say to the hot-dog vendor?
Make me one with everything.*
Thank you, I'll be here all week.
@cartman82 said in He who laughs last...:
My Boss has so completely mishandled this project, I am astonished. He has no idea what's done, what remains to be done, what works, what doesn't.
He asks me to make an importer, I work overtime on Friday to make it happen, turns out it already exists.
He asks me to make sure a crucial 3rd party integration, on which the entire product depends, is up to snuff. I look around, can't find the code anywhere. Boss: "Ah right, we actually never finished that because we never got the account working."
Did I mention he handed over the project to the client over the weekend?
This has got to be the biggest clusterfuck I was ever involved with. And I've seen quite a few.
How long before you get blamed for this one?
My experience with them is that they seem to provide their (employer) customers with algorithmic keyword screening. If your resume has ALL the keywords in the job description, you might get called for at least a screening interview. Like Hired or ZipRecruiter, Indeed is just another tool for employers to claim that there are no qualified candidates out there and justify hiring an overseas codemill on the cheap.
Thank you for ruining my Friday. This morning I woke up all bright and cheery, filled with hope for humankind. After reading about this Endarkening monstrosity I have lost all faith in my fellow H. sapiens.
Maybe I should take up drinking or something harder to take the edge off my existential despair.
@gleemonk said in Polar M200 review: you need an app for that:
The watch is happy now. Looks like I'm dying too because my pulse dropped to 58 according to the watch.
So the M200 needs to be connected to a device that has this shit Polar sync-app installed where you have registered with Polar online so it can sync it's settings online through the browser to function. All this shit just to see my heart-rate. Fuck you Polar.
Well, how can they monetize you without a connection? You didn't really think the device is intended for your benefit, did you?
Isn't this just another way for Facebook to keep track of what you are doing and where you are going on the web even when you aren't logged in?
I am TRTWTF (JavaScript that should never have been written?)
FTFY.
There are several of these articles, and you may not be a fan of the site they are coming from, but this really cannot be missed.
that just works.
These words are poisoned for me. Every time I've been told that something "just works," it breaks immediately, and offers no way to fix it (because it's not supposed to be possible to break).
Then shouldn't it be, "Just breaks"?
What, the utility company didn't blame her for the error?
@cartman82 said in Bore:
CryptoBoss just dropped in for a little chat. Of course, Bore had to whine a bit to him about his "unfair" treatment.
CryptoBoss: I apologize, I saw you were diligently studying, I didn't want to bother you.
Bore: (his English is not top notch) Err... I don't understand... "diligently"?
Me: He means you were learning react very hard over the past two weeks.
Bore: (goes pale) Ah... yes.... of course.
Poor CryptoBoss. It seems he hired this guy because he offhand mentioned he's into crypto currencies. He should have hired for talent instead.
So does your new company have anything with "blockchain" in it? Because that seems to be where the vulture venture capital is now.
@boomzilla said in Look before you paste.:
@remi said in Look before you paste.:
Is that how you old timers called it in your days?
I'm manually downloading a blob right now.
I do that too. Fiber helps.
@Dreikin said in 'Clean your desk' -- Interviews at Amazon:
@Tsaukpaetra said in WTF Bites:
http://shivankaul.com/blog/2016/12/07/clean-your-desk-yet-another-amazon-interview-experience.html
Jesus. Installing software where the proctor then goes in and messes with system settings? Oh FUCK NO. NO ONE gets remote access to my machine.
Seriously, if I started an interview like that, I'd be "I'm sorry. If this is how you do interviews, I can't work for you. Thank you. Click."
update: finished reading, saw he finally gave the
Oh, for that he'll get a Windows PE VM isolated from the internal network. Good luck finding Control Panel, sucker!
I'm wondering what they do about people who don't have a camera and mic attached. Auto-fail because poor, never use videochat, and/or don't make cheap YouTube videos?
I recently interviewed at a place (the name rhymes with Schmivotal Schmabs) where the first interview process assumed
That's because they do pair programming and want to see how you do it.
I actually was able to get an on-site interview with the same guy I was originally going to do the video with. The place skews young and looks and feels like a dot-com office. I was by far the oldest person there, not counting the receptionist.
Needless to say, they weren't interested after the initial interview even though the position was for a skill set that I have that they are lacking (.NET on Windows, using WinForms--the company is a Mac shop using the JS library of the month).
I also had another interview with an outfit that contracts with the government (they monitor the electrical infrastructure for much of the west). They use something called HireVue. Meh. This one didn't pan out, either, because I'm not a SOLID purist.
Sorry if this got a bit OT. I'm looking for a new job and it's a bit frustrating when everyone wants actual experience with sUX and your career path hasn't gone in that direction.
@CrazyEyes said in Stupid patent lawsuits:
I don't know how you can say "This is fine" when a multinational corporation uses the laws of a nation against it on its own turf (using patents to keep live-saving knowledge and production rights out of the hands of native citizens)
Welcome to the world of the TPP and TTIP.
They didn't, really. The year used to start in March under the Romans (it being the month of the war god Mars, after all, and the Romans were into that sort of thing), which made September through December an accurate numeration of the months in the Roman year.
[/pedant]
@anonymous234 said in Shareable design:
@Bort said in Shareable design:
So making an intuitive UI becomes very difficult past the tap/swipe inputs
Honestly, I like the pattern "hide everything that's not considered the main content behind a single
button".It effectively doubles your screen space, is much less painful than trying to achieve everything with obscure combinations of swipes and taps and various menus next to everything, and it can actually be implemented consistently in pretty much every app, at the cost of at most one extra tap per task.
You should NOT, however, use this pattern on big screens where you actually have enough space to fit everything. That would be stupid.
But since only the olds use things like laptops or (Cthulhu forbid) towers anymore, who cares about them?
@benjamin-hall said in "Le mobile multifonction":
@slavdude Latvian officially replaced "telephons" (telephone) with "tālrunis" (the diacritic doubles the length of the vowel)--"telephons" was too foreign. "Tāl" means "far", and "runat" is the verb "to speak". So it's basically a retranslation from the greek (telephone means basically the same thing).
That's called a calque. The Russians did a lot of that in the eighteenth century and later. One example is two different words for "horizon" gorizont (горизонт), which is from Greek, and krugozor (кругозор), which is a literal translation (calque) of German Rundschau.
And they're the same HR departments that pass on otherwise qualified candidates because the resume doesn't have all of the keywords used by their filtering algorithms.
@maciejasjmj said in Meet ‘Genies,’ the lifelike personalized avatars that reenact news:
It's as if Microsoft took that bot that users trained to act like Hitler and called it a feature.
No, what's missing here is a resurrection of Clippy. Though that could be in the works too.
@timebandit said in A breed of scamming so new it's been around for at least a decade already:
@raceprouk Yes, but they'll have Bluetooth so you can see on your phone how many revolution around the world you did
And it will allow you to compare stats with others around the world and serve yoyo-related ads to your phone. Not only that, but you can subscribe for upgrades. Oh look, another IoT application.
@dangeruss said in Polar M200 review: you need an app for that:
@bb36e said in Polar M200 review: you need an app for that:
@dangeruss +1, I got a fitbit flex and only needed it for setup. That said, the HR monitor can be slightly unreliable if you're doing any sort of jogging/running.
I'm sure none of them are particular reliable ( including the apple watch IIRC). My coworker said her apple watch would not measure the heart rate properly unless you told it you were running or something.
My wife has a Fitbit. She taught herself to juggle some years ago and often uses it as a way to exercise. The Fitbit thinks she's riding an elliptical when she does.
@boomzilla How long before Electron starts showing up as a requirement in job descriptions?
@1 That's not that bad... Be glad it wasn't 60!
Yeah, that was after they changed the Senate filibuster rule.
/lame US politics joke.
@timebandit Needs barbed wire for extra clueness.
[/Negan]
Nope; they take parameters or arguments.
@masonwheeler said in MUFFIN:
So what's the difference between a muffin and a cupcake?
Generally, you won't find cupcakes in a meadow (see also: road apple).
@RaceProUK said in Because emoji are professional now:
@Zecc said in Because emoji are professional now:
Does anyone even use
«»
?I think the French do.
Russian sometimes uses them as quotation marks too.
@RaceProUK said in Internet privacy is dead, redux:
@izzion True, but to avoid Google and Facebook et al would require me to move to Mars or something.
I personally use Startpage. A colleague at a place I used to work pointed it out to me. It's Google without the ad crap.
Sounds like Stanford's CS program is being retooled to produce low-paying keyboard monkeys who will create Yet Another Goddamned JavaScript Library(tm). Because we clearly don't have enough of those in the world, and no one uses desktops anymore.
@anonymous234 said in Title:
@mihi Ah yes, the confusion between nouns and verbs in software translated from English is ubiquitous.
Another favorite of mine is confusing "play" as in play a movie and "play" as in play a game, which in most languages are not the same verb.
And of course "play" as in
(Insert obligatory PC LOAD LETTER joke/link here)
@sumireko said in My web app died from performance bankruptcy:
@anonymous234 said in My web app died from performance bankruptcy:
@cartman82 said in My web app died from performance bankruptcy:
Ethos of the web has always been "do not, ever, for any reason break old websites". That's why we put up with half the shit javascript has to keep dragging around.
Right, but is there any reason why websites can't just say "this page uses HTML-2017" and the browser will disable all the old ugly javascript things and enable all the new behaviors? It seems to be the cleanest way to allow breaking changes over time.
Admittedly that won't help if the Chrome team decides to retroactively change the HTML-2010 behavior to "make pages faster at the cost of just a little breakage"...
Are you crazy? That's not the JavaScript way. The JavaScript way is to add shims, polyfills, bells, whistles, and a whole host of cool sounding things to add another layer to JavaScript "compiling".
All of which breaks with the next release of whatever framework the developers are using because the maintainers can't be arsed to update their documentation.
@lolwhat said in Problem Ejecting USB Mass Storage Device:
@hungrier said in Problem Ejecting USB Mass Storage Device:
Shut off all power to your house at the breaker box, it's the only way
Nah, use some thermite on the neighborhood transformer. Go big or go home.
No, best of all is to take off and nuke the place from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.
Yet another reason to avoid Gmail. I just hope other email providers have a way to disable this shit. I mean, come on. It's bad enough that Yahoo shows videos in empty mailboxes with no way to turn them off. This seems to go beyond the pale and provide Google with yet another way to steal your data to serve you ads.
@atazhaia said in Meow Ludo Disco Gamma Meow Meow:
Meow-Ludo Disco Gamma Meow-Meow, which is his legal name
cyborg rights
You implanted an RFID chip into your hand. Anyone with a pacemaker is more cyborg than you are.
Fun fact: when I was at the company 50-year anniversary there were some guys there doing free RFID chip implants, listing "train ticket in your hand" as a potential use case. Dunno how well supported that actually is atm, though. May be a bit early and I'm not jumping on that train before it's fully tested, proven and in major usage.
So what happens when you're fired, resign, or retire?
@boomzilla I think a lot of accidents on highways also occur when you have, say, people driving the speed limit in the passing lane rather than in the travel lane.
@laoc said in What the fuck can't marketing people write a proper email?:
@e4tmyl33t said in What the fuck can't marketing people write a proper email?:
No, only the black text should be the subject. The grey stuff is a preview of text in the body, and most "email marketing" places put the "View this in your browser if your email client is crap" and other useless things first before doing any of the styling so that's all you end up seeing in the preview.
Those are the worst, and I'll go to great lengths to annoy them back if they do that. If you absolutely have to include your HTML vomit in email, fucking include a plaintext part. If you're too stupid to do that, leave it out completely and my mutt will take care of extracting something resembling text from the HTML. Plaintext that effectively says "read the vomit so I can include my fucking web bugs to create PowerPoints for marketing and sell the database with your preferences sexual and otherwise to other spammers" is not acceptable.
And, now that Google wants to start including executables in email, I'm sure this will get even better.
@djls45 said in Tax Return Processing Fee:
@dkf said in Tax Return Processing Fee:
@M_Adams said in Tax Return Processing Fee:
retroactively adjust their tax laws
Is that constitutional?
No, but technically speaking, neither is the entire progressive income tax structure.
Well, there is this bit in the Constitution, too:
The Congress shall have power to lay and collect taxes on incomes, from whatever source derived, without apportionment among the several states and without regard to any census or enumeration.
They also described the sea as "wine-dark". So there were some serious color-vision issues happening there.
But it's not like they couldn't see it. It's just that they did not have a word for blue because distinguishing this color was not culturally important at the time (Homer's time).
On one of the snark/politics blogs I frequent, there was some guy writing in to explain his libertarian/Randian philosophy to us benighted souls, and referred to the "args" he was going to make. Basically, the use of that abbreviation is what people focused on rather than on the substance of the arguments themselves (not that there was much to them other than a regurgitation of Ayn Rand). He claimed to be a computer programmer who uses "args" in everyday conversation. I have never heard anyone, in our field or elsewhere, talk like that. Whatever credibility he might have had went out the window for all of us, even if there were people on the board at the time who might have sympathized wit his views.
@blek said in Safe Space:
The internet suggests that, though it might just be a case of a very vocal minority; millenials are the generation that grew up with modern computers and internet, they're more used to it so they're more likely to use these tools to broadcast their stupidity than previous generations.
IMHO I think it is because of the internet and the fragmentation of the media that we get this: people are more likely to stay within their comfort zones than get exposed to points of view or ideas different from theirs.
(Older Gen-Xer here.)
@slavdude The third link is probably the most interesting, as it contains screenshots of the problem.
@carnage said in Uber, the sociopathic company full of psychopaths, now with murder! (Because regulations aren't "Disruptive" enough!):
I would guess that her attention was entirely directed at a smartphone, instead of the heavy metal objects hurtling past as she stepped into the street.
Actually, I heard that she was walking a bicycle. Doesn't change the result.
Totally! I love me some iced tea on a hot summer day.
Aw yeah. And sun tea is the best, with lots of your choice of sweetener. Mm-mm.