I mean, I'm kind of pleased there are actually constructive comments and no jerkoffs (so to speak) in the thread yet. Don't know if that's SO moderation at work or a reasonably good community. Who cares what the code's for?
Best posts made by heterodox
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RE: On not using the right example subject on StackOverflow in your code [potentially NSFW]
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RE: The Official Status Thread
* stops licking paw and stares at the wall*
: "What's bothering you now, you re--" *turns and looks at the wall*
: Hello!
: "... Ah. I'm going to go to my room; if you deal with that, you'll get a treat."He's had good hunting recently; I don't know why, as spiders usually come in from the cold, not during the summer.
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RE: WTF Bites
@Polygeekery said in WTF Bites:
It is even dumber than that. If you just hit enter and skip all of the authentication questions it continues and imports your payees. The only thing that was required was username and password.
... that's all kinds of special.
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RE: Helpful error message
@masonwheeler said in Helpful error message:
Sometimes you just need to think about whether what you're about to say is fundamentally absurd in the context of known facts. And sometimes people fail to do that.
: "E-mail's down."
: "Please use <this> e-mail address to create a ticket in the ops' ticketing system."
: "..." -
RE: The Official Funny Stuff Thread™
@dragoon said in The Official Funny Stuff Thread™:
With the state of education we have today, I wonder how long it took somebody to realize it was giving wrong answers?
I deliberately tried without RTFA because I wanted to be surprised as to what it'd do. What in the motherfuck? I wasn't even trying to type it quickly. Got 24 as described.
Is it really incapable of registering keypresses while also doing an animation? ... fucking why?
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RE: :wtf: How can this be so wrong??? (AKA the Discopocalypse thread)
@DoctorJones said in How can this be so wrong??? (AKA the Discopocalypse thread):
: CLOSED
Here's the best part:
This topic will be automatically deleted in a day.
Unbelievable.
Or really, not unbelievable, unfortunately. But I wish it were.
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RE: Excel is fundamentally broken.
@anotherusername said in Excel is fundamentally broken.:
I am probably certifiably insane now
*stares* You certainly are. Well done.
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RE: The Official Status Thread
Fridays are boring. *flips through scans*
High severity: PostgreSQL no password
Setting a system administrator on fire is a good way to wrap up the week. *looks up POCs for that server*
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RE: In other news today...
@anotherusername The footnotes on pp. 7-8 were particularly entertaining.
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RE: The Official Status Thread
So, had two finals back to back this evening... that was fun.
The first one... I'm not going to parse words here. I got fucking WRECKED. By the time the final ended, my leg had been twisted up my asshole and my mouth ended up on my left nipple. The only consolation I have is that every classmate I talked to afterwards seemed to be in the same state of shock; one must hope that there'll be an aggressive curve. I know one of my friends in the class actually threw up afterwards — yes, it was that bad. I wasn't feeling much better, though I was feeling resigned rather than sick. What the fuck was the professor thinking...
On the other hand, the second final was as good as the first final was bad, and that's saying something. I was honestly dreading that one more, as that's a class that's 100% mathematics and that's not my strong suit. But it's like the professor picked exclusively from the list of topics with which I'm most familiar and gave me problems I could do with one hand tied behind my back. I think I got one question wrong (well, I know it– it was variance of a composition of two dependent and different probability distributions, and I swear we didn't have enough information to solve the problem– I ended up just pretending they were independent distributions and hoped I'd get partial credit). But the rest I was 100% sure of and the final grade is a minimum grade for the course. So I was on fucking cloud nine, baby. I swear I've never felt that good.
I have a term paper due tomorrow (of which I've written 1/3) and at work, crunch time also starts tomorrow (cutover to a new software distribution, I'm the only person with access to the back end, I know it's going to be a nightmare because yesterday we weren't even sure what we were going to be doing). But that's tomorrow, suckers. I've got the hard part of my year done, as far as I'm concerned.
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RE: The Official Funny Stuff Thread™
@djls45 I don't think the English language is ever going to recover from that atrocity.
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RE: In other news today...
@boner said in In other news today...:
one of the incidents involved the doorbell of the Indian deputy High Commissioner J P Singh being rung at 3 am. Since the Indian side felt that this was done by Pakistan’s security agencies, the Pakistan deputy high commissioner Syed Haider Shah’s door bell was also rung at 3 am in next few days.
If kids ever need any reassurance that when they grow old they don't have to grow up, all they have to do is look to international diplomacy.
Edit: Also, that Web site is the worst Web site for a news site I've ever seen. The /lite/ version of the article URL didn't work, had to go to home page to look up the article, home page took about two and a half minutes before it was even scrollable, eventually got to article with each intermediate step taking another couple minutes, then when I was on a different tab, that tab crashed in the background.
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RE: WTF Bites
I like people like that. I like making their head explode with one command:
heterodox@ahlctuwbn:~# isecav --version McAfee Endpoint Security for Linux Threat Prevention Version : 10.6.0.153 License : Full DAT Version : 9186.0 DAT Date : 05-03-2019 Engine Version : 6000.8403 Copyright (C) 2016-2019 McAfee, LLC. All rights reserved.
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RE: Internet of shit
@blek said in Internet of shit:
@heterodox I always wondered how the "find me a recipe" thing works, since I've seen it used as an example a lot. Does it display the recipe for you on a screen somewhere or does it start reading it? The former requires a screen and the latter just sounds incredibly inconvenient.
It just starts reading it. You tell it "next ingredient" or "next step" to have it move on. I've used it, it's actually not as inconvenient as it sounds; having to grab a phone or look at a laptop screen is probably less convenient. You can talk while kneading, with dirty hands, with your head in the fridge, or whatever.
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RE: Which language is the least bad?
@masonwheeler said in Which language is the least bad?:
Seriously?
No, I was making a very obscure joke.
Of course I'm serious. Repeat after me:
- My experience may not be your experience.
- Your mileage may vary.
- This tofurkey may contain tree nuts.
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RE: The Official Status Thread
@heterodox said in The Official Status Thread:
I feel it's safe to say that this was the worst Monday I've ever had (more details maybe forthcoming, or maybe I just want to get it off my chest).
So far my timeline is:
3:30 a.m.: Wake up because all my phones are blaring emergency alerts about flash floods. Fuck you, phones. Notice that I have completely unexpected back pain, about 6-8 on the pain scale (WTF?!) (which my dad remarked would be about 8-10 in a normal person, I don't like to complain). Take a couple hours to go back to sleep, rearranging pillows different ways, tossing and turning, trying not to scream. I still don't know what that was all about. Time to get new mattress?
7:00 a.m.: Wake up for work. Yesterday, I was near narcoleptic and my eyes were hurting when moving to one side; for me, this is always a sign that I'm coming down with something. Decide not to come in to work and rest/work from home all day to try to countermand, we just started system integration testing and also I have a research project due in two weeks, this is not the time to succumb to illness. By the way, research project has been set all semester and I've barely started; that's the way graduate students roll.
10:00 a.m.: Oh, system integration testing isn't working because database refresh suspended last night because tablespace was out of room. Did I mention I went to bed around 1:30 a.m.? I had seen that and extended tablespace, thinking it was fine. Job resumed but apparently there was a timeout on certain objects because they're fucking empty and all application functionality is broken. Fucking Oracle. Restart database refresh, fucking everyone else up who expected to work through the morning today.
12:00 p.m.: Database refresh complete. At least no issues there. Find out Red Team found out about a subdomain which is going to really complicate assessment given how it works, take an hour writing up an e-mail explaining it to them. Belatedly wonder whether I shouldn't have done that and should have just cut them off given three users typically have access to that subdomain, why did I grant it to them? An edge case that's likely to fuck me.
2:00 p.m.: Another org is pinging me again about testing their VDIs (they're going to be cutting off VPN soon, which would result in a total work stoppage). Yes, it took three weeks to get CTO approval for new software. Yes, a work order for installation of the software has been open for a week. This is the fast track compared to how things usually operate. What the fuck do you want from me?
6:30 p.m.: Leave to head to campus. Make a left turn at a break in traffic. I'd be well-advised not to comment on fault, but let's say car appears that can't have possibly been there, I send that car over the median. Other driver is in shock, but blaming me pretty hard... her pronouncements are going to feature in my nightmares for a while. I'm in shock too. Yay, my first major car accident in <insert really long time> of driving. Other driver is taken to the hospital. I just walk home since I was about 30 seconds out of my driveway.
Not a good start to a week. Have a plan for leaving at 0930 for a 1300 meeting. Insurance is offering me a rental car but with my anxiety levels I'm pretty sure I'm not up to drive and I'm certainly not up to drive on the Beltway with someone else's car. Fuck that. It's only been eight months since my last insurance claim, I'm pretty sure it's time for my vehicle clearance to be administratively downgraded to "bicycle".
I haven't cried in 15 years or so, but been pretty close several times today.
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RE: WTF Bites
@timebandit Even better for WTF Bites: That article briefly loads for me then goes to a 404. What the fuck? Even if I search for it on the site, it does the same thing. Went to another news site to view the story instead, so well done, Vice. You dumb shits.
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RE: In other news today...
High doses of the common painkiller over a long period of time may put men at greater risk of fertility problems and other health issues, research indicates
High doses of anything over a long period of time may cause health issues. Must be a slow news day.
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RE: The Official Status Thread
A recurring theme with one of my clients: Things like, "Please remove <specific row> from the spreadsheet and send back for submittal."
FUCKING REMOVE IT YOURSELF. AS A TAXPAYER, I'M GLAD TO KNOW YOU'RE PAYING $xxx AN HOUR FOR NONSENSE REQUESTS LIKE THIS WHEN YOU COULD HAVE REMOVED IT YOURSELF AND SUBMITTED IT TO ITS DESTINATION TODAY RATHER THAN TOMORROW WHEN YOU GET BACK TO WORK.
I'm cranky tonight.
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RE: WTF Bites
I'm also not sure who deemed those people capable of doing anything with a PC (except for pressing the power button. And even there I'm not too certain).
It really sounds like they were the perfect choice for securing privileged correspondence.
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RE: In other news today...
https://www.politico.com/story/2018/01/31/hamas-palestinians-terrorism-blacklist-380414
I find it fascinating that both of these stories are in the news today even if they don't have anything to do with each other.
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RE: The Official Status Thread
Getting this on about one out of every ten requests:
That is not an error message that should exist on any system ever.
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RE: Random thought of the day
You know how when you're really in trouble, you get called by your full name?
It just occurred to me that my cat probably thinks his full name consists of a lot of four-letter words.
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RE: The Official Status Thread
Got an e-mail recently about greater transparency in our communications.
Coworker: "Good morning, @heterodox; how are you?"
: "Sleep-deprived and belligerent; you need something, fly boy?"On reflection, that's probably not what they meant.
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RE: No 'Access-Control-Allow-Origin' header is present on the requested resource.
@accalia said in No 'Access-Control-Allow-Origin' header is present on the requested resource.:
i should NOT have to manually wrap a FUCK_CORS() function call about my data. I'll take this solution if there's literally no other solution, but it is NOT an acceptable one in my book.
I mean... you kind of should have to do that. It impairs usability, but that's the security tradeoff. Without the same-origin policy (some measure of "consent"), what's restricting your GitHub page from requesting the list of notifications you have pending on WTDWTF? Or posts from the lounge? Or updating your profile settings on Facebook? Or requesting your bank balances?
This is how the Web has to work now, and it only seems like such a huge impediment because the original design and premise of the Web was woefully naïve and it had to be fixed after the fact.
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RE: Improving features, the Microsoft way
@ben_lubar said in Improving features, the Microsoft way:
Is that the one where you can watch two porns at the same time?
Oh, that's what + and + are for.
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autorun.inf tomfoolery
I was trying to determine last night and all of today why the installer for Oracle HTTP Server would start, display "Preparing installer...", then "Cleaning up...", and then exit, without logging anything to the Oracle inventory. Theories ranged from McAfee Host Intrusion Prevention violations to folder permissions on the inventory.
Finally searched Metalink (which I should have done earlier, to be fair) and immediately found document 2078395.1. To sum it up, the Oracle Installer extracts its contents to a temporary directory then ShellExecutes autorun.inf to kick off the installer for some God damn reason. If you have the autorun.inf IniFileMapping set to @SYS:DoesNotExist as we do to avoid a security compliance finding, then the installer will just quietly fall over and die.
Oracle... why would you do that...
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RE: :wtf: How can this be so wrong??? (AKA the Discopocalypse thread)
@boomzilla said in How can this be so wrong??? (AKA the Discopocalypse thread):
For performance reasons.
You need a dialog CDN.
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RE: Confuse your colleagues
@BernieTheBernie said in Confuse your colleagues:
Can you guess its name?
IDataRead, of courseMissed his opportunity to call it
IReadData
; that's what I would have done. -
RE: I hate printers, with a passion
@levicki said in I hate printers, with a passion:
Oh I am so sorry to dissappoint you, Princess. I'll try to be more funny in the future just for you. I'd appreciate some pointers on how to be wrong and funny, because being funny is obviously more important to you than being right.
Most people don't find "being right" and "not being a cunt" to be an either-or proposition.
Also, the more strident you are about something, the more likely it is that you're wrong. This effect isn't unique to you but it's particularly pronounced.
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RE: Internet of shit
@dcoder said in Internet of shit:
"how many servers could it take to turn on a light bulb lol"
Philips Hue: hold my beerThe only way in which I can excuse Philips for this is that you don't have to be Internet-connected; in fact, they recommend you not be if you can just use the LAN. I have my Hue Bridge blocked at the router.
I wish more "IoT" devices worked like that but no, we need an Internet connection to recognize speech now, when we had devices ten years ago that could do speech recognition without one.
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RE: WTF Bites
@timebandit said in WTF Bites:
Run a command with
sudo
, if it works, you're vulnerable.Uh, yeah. Just looked at the script:
#!/bin/sh # TODO: Backdoor this machine? modprobe pcspkr beep -l 1000 -r 3 -f 44000
Great. Fuckers.
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RE: Excel is fundamentally broken.
@mikehurley said in Excel is fundamentally broken.:
I thought putting values in double quotes was the CSV way of saying "string, us as-is". Does Excel try to interpret these kinds of values.
It sure does. -_-
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RE: The Official Status Thread
in Ops chat: "Just as a friendly reminder, please don't leave 80 GB of build backups on the deploy servers, or I'll find so many configuration management and patching tasks to assign you'll quite simply wish you were dead."
's manager: "You have an interesting definition of 'friendly reminder'."
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RE: The Official Status Thread
Man, things get bitchy once you start handing out duplicate process IDs. "Wahh, wahh, wahh, I can't tell which process I am or who I'm really waiting on." Figure it out, you pansy.
This message brought to you by the Tough Love OS.
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RE: The Official Status Thread
Built a browser add-on with some custom changes, doing so exemplified the problems with the Node.js ecosystem in a nutshell.
Cloned the source from Git: 2.2 MB.
Made my changes.
Ran peru sync, yarn, yarn build:ext.
Resulting directory: 2.2 GB.All to build a 1.62 MB add-on.
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RE: How to exit vim reaches 1M views on stack overflow
@dkf said in How to exit vim reaches 1M views on stack overflow:
See how long it takes for the sysadmin to realise that they're not actually crazy.
Can't be evaluated; sysadmins are all crazy.
Source: Am sysadmin.
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RE: How not to CV
@RaceProUK said in How not to CV:
Who are you calling 'old fruit'? :P
I had a birthday recently, so I'm assuming me. Also, to contribute to this topic:
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RE: No thread about the GitLab fuckup yet?
@RaceProUK said in No thread about the GitLab fuckup yet?:
You have a point, but I'd be more concerned about the fact they had five backup strategies, all of which failed. And no-one noticed until it was too late.
You only know that because of the transparency, though. The amount of detail you'd get from most other companies is a single, bland statement that, "Due to an unscheduled outage in production, about six hours of issues and pull requests were lost, but not any of your files! So you're all good. If you have a paid account or something and you really want some form of compensation, then fine, open a ticket with our support team and we'll figure something out (i.e., ignore you)."
@Yamikuronue said in No thread about the GitLab fuckup yet?:
He thinks they'll go under because of this incident.
It's possible, but I hope they don't.
@flabdablet said in No thread about the GitLab fuckup yet?:
This approach is of course in no way scalable; I can get away with it because I'm only backing up the one VM host.
Right. That'd be my counterargument to, "Why didn't anyone notice... x, y, or z?" Because they have a pretty large project as a GitHub competitor and appear to be, as 99% of companies are, operating on a shoestring Ops budget. (I think there were notations in the Google Doc from two, maybe three ops by initials? It's hardly a booming department.) Things fall through the cracks; as a lot of the opshugs said (what a cute concept), these things happen everywhere.
@JazzyJosh said in No thread about the GitLab fuckup yet?:
@Maciejasjmj Well not everything. Apparently the git repos were fine?
Yeah, those were stored on the filesystem, obviously, and not in Postgres.
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RE: WTF Bites
@tsaukpaetra Plus .., what's up with mentioning first MS Office and then listing Word/Excel/PPT and a few others separately again? (Also, there's no mention of OneNote... I sense a hole in the MS Office experience. )
That's easy. Keywords.
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RE: Things that remind you of WDTWTF members
@topspin said in Things that remind you of WDTWTF members:
Wait, you can just put the generator into the wall socket and feed the house from that??
I mean, I guess that works. What happens when power comes back on?Bad things, demonstrated here.
Powering stuff when there is a power outage – 06:26
— ElectroBOOM -
RE: The Most Absurd Thing You've Ever Coded/Built
@Mason_Wheeler said in The Most Absurd Thing You've Ever Coded/Built:
Is this a "IT is being a bunch of derps and cranking the firewall up to 11" situation, or... (Because if so, at that point I would start taking a very serious look at the practice known as "change your organization or change your organization"...)
It is a "working on an air-gapped network" situation.
There actually is a GitHub-equivalent where I can request repositories (that'll then automatically be mirrored from the Internet every two weeks or so, which is pretty cool) but again, it would have taken time to get that request approved. It only took an hour or so to write a basic .tar parser, as ugly as it surely was.
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RE: FlightAware starts using :disco: :horse: Sadness ensues
@boomzilla said in FlightAware starts using Sadness ensues:
Early on we lobbied for a change in the way images were loaded so that the viewport didn't jank around (AKA jellypotato). The problem was with images on the page above where you were looking. NodeBB however also doesn't load images below what you're looking at. This has the advantage of saving bandwidth for mobile users at the expense of fixing the original problem, plus the posts aren't ready to be viewed when you get there.
There's still the problem that even with pagination, and even with delay image loading turned off, if I hit a notification for the inspiration thread I'm guaranteed to be taken anywhere other than the actual target of the notification or my last read post. There's something genuinely screwed up there.
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RE: Breaking Windows in Creative Ways
@jbert said in Breaking Windows in Creative Ways:
I hope the admins know about loading hive files through regedit...
Or just wipe out the users profile.
He deserves itIt's the only way to be sure.Filed under: Is my BOFH showing?