The Amusing Limerick Thread
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There once was a man from Ealing
Who got on a bus to Darjeeling
It said on the door
"Please don't spit on the floor"
So he carefully spat on the ceiling
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A wonderful bird is the pelican,
His bill can hold more than his belly can.
He can take in his beak
Food enough for a week
But I’m damned if I see how the hell he can.
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There once was a man from Japan
whose limericks never would scan.
When told it was so,
he replied, "yes, I know,
for I always try to fit as many words into the very last line as ever I possibly can!"
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@masonwheeler I've seen a slightly different variation on this
There once was a man named Nick
Who could not write a limerick
He said "Yes, I know
I write just so-so
But I always fuck up the last line really bad"
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My Mexican slang is bereft
I butcher the words like a chef
So when it is time
To make up a line
The best I have is 'my name jeff'
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There was an old lady of Ryde
Who ate ten green apples, and died.
The apples fermented
inside the lamented,
And made cider inside her inside.
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@masonwheeler No wonder it doesn't scan: the second to last line is missing a syllable.
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I knew a Jeff once---he's lame.
I never wondered what he became.
He made a site with answers
People say it's a cancer
He clearly sniffed too much cocaine.
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There was a young lady of Riga,
Who smiled when she rode on a tiger.
They came back from the ride
With the lady inside,
And the smile on the face of the tiger.
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Einstein, the frizzy-haired,
said E equals MC squared.
Thus all mass decreases
as activity ceases?
Not my mass, my ass declared!
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I own a book called "The Limerick"
with 1500 jokes that are quite sick.
I can tell you one daily
for months with out failing
but I'd rather rub my joystick.
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( (12 + 144 + 20 + 3 Sqrt[4]) / 7 ) + 5*11 = 92 + 0 .
or, in more limericky form
A dozen, a gross, and a score,plus three times the square root of four,
divided by seven,
plus five times eleven,
is nine squared and not a bit more.
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@jaloopa The "Nerdy Limerick Thread" is
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@rhywden I find it amusing, therefore it fits
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@pie_flavor Bad 'shop. Need to add some perspective distortion to the 'shopped text.
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There was a young man from Peru
Who asked how he should add two plus two:
"I think more and more,
That it makes about four.
But I fear that is almost too few."
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@jaloopa said in The Amusing Limerick Thread:
@rhywden I find it amusing, therefore it fits
https://memegenerator.net/img/instances/500x/69004683/neeeeeeeeeerds.jpg
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