The Daily WTF Wants Writers...Again!
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Hello Readers,
So, two years ago, we put out the call for more writers (http://thedailywtf.com/Articles/The-Daily-WTF-Wants-Writers!.aspx) and the response was tremendous! Well, we're ready to add some more writers to our pool.
Ideally, you should come from an technical background, enjoy creative writing, and be willing to commit to 1 - 4 articles a month. Also, yes - it's OK if you reside outside of the US.
The process to become one of "us" is pretty simple. Check out this image. It's a legit, vintage Apple ad from the 80's...but it's also pretty representative of your average reader submission.
Based on this, write up a complete story in what you view would be in the voice of The Daily WTF and send it to inbox@worsethanfailure.com. Length of the finished article should be in the 300-500 range - not too long or short. Include some background info so we can get to know you. Also, if you submitted last time, try again and be sure to tell us how much of a mistake we made by not picking you first time around. Finally, if you have questions - ask! We're friendly and you lose ZERO points for communicating with us.
Benefits to you?
First, this is a paid gig. You won't get rich, but it's not bad as far as extra money goes.
Second, fame and bragging rights! You'll have a selection of articles that will be read by thousands. Share them with your co-workers, friends, frenemies, and anybody else.
Consider this to be a permanent request without a deadline but the sooner the better!
Thanks,
Mark
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can my creative writing pieces found around this forum be considered my submission instead?
serious question.
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Is starting with "Like a ninja in the night" a requirement?
Filed under: like a ninja in a dark, stormy night, in which the rain fell in torrents
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Well, the article is way better than the last couple months of TDWTF front page. I wouldn't change much, maybe some anonymization (pineapple?), or could put a little more effort than @mark_bowytz and choose a different article from last time.
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as a follow up to my previous serious question, which is now defunct as I have just finished writing a new piece.
Am I permitted to repost my submission on the forums immediately? regardless of if it is good enough to make the cut, I know some people around here will enjoy it, and I would like to give them the opportunity to have a read as well as yourself.
Filed Under: The people's choice for frontpage writer?
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If @algorythmics doesn't get the job, I'm quitting the forums!
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Is starting with "Like a ninja in the night" a requirement?
Like a ninja in the night, Hanz M., AKA Hanzo, stalked across a burning up Apple ][...
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I'm glad everyone is talking about hanzo, because I played to my strengths with my submission, so assuming that I am allowed to post it, you will all enjoy that familiarity
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can my creative writing pieces found around this forum be considered my submission instead?
serious question.
Serious answer. I'll allow it. Send in a link to what you feel to be your top 5 best.The ones you feel that are most representative of your style.
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Well, the article is way better than the last couple months of TDWTF front page.
As always, our stories are only as good as the submissions that we receive.
I wouldn't change much, maybe some anonymization (pineapple?)
I wouldn't. The IIe is a really recognizable model and gets a lot of folks right in the feels.
could put a little more effort than @mark_bowytz and choose a different article from last time.
Absolutely not. This is perfect. Perfect length, perfect content, great imagery. AND, it has a cat. QUADFECTA.
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ninja
No ninjas. Also, if your submission makes fun of Erik, you'll be immediately dropped from consideration. Keep it classy.
Keep in mind too - when you write for us your audience are some of the best and worst asshats in the world. Be prepared to accept much harsher criticism than you would in real life.
If you aren't prepared to potentially be jeered for writing about the next Hanzo, DON'T APPLY.
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I'm glad everyone is talking about hanzo, because I played to my strengths with my submission, so assuming that I am allowed to post it, you will all enjoy that familiarity
At least it will be sexy.
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Am I permitted to repost my submission on the forums immediately?
Absolutely! I encourage everybody to do this if they want to.
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Also, if your submission makes fun of Erik, you'll be immediately dropped from consideration. Keep it classy.
Can we incorporate terninaries? (Okay, okay, I'll stop.)
Keep in mind too - when you write for us your audience are some of the best and worst asshats in the world.
Not to mention the worst of the worst.
I might give it a try, but I'm kinda tapped out when it comes to creativity now.
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Also, if your submission makes fun of Erik, you'll be immediately dropped from consideration. Keep it classy.
Welp. I was going to post some of my front page story edits, but those are all about making fun of Erik (aside from the ones about Discourse).
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No ninjas. Also, if your submission makes fun of Erik, you'll be immediately dropped from consideration. Keep it classy.
I have emailed my submission, but based on the above I am pretty sure it wont go well for me. I have tried to explain and justify my decisions/style in the email, and I wont be posting it till I hear back either way. It all comes down to how well I hit the mark I am aiming for.
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hit the mark I am aiming for
Hitting the editor in chief is also going to get you dropped from consideration. NO VIOLENCE!
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noted. It probably wont come to that though, I am pretty sure I am not good enough to hit the level I want to, where what I am doing is acceptable to the front page crew.
Filed Under: How algorythmic's dreams of being internet famous were crushed once more
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Cornify this cat picture, and you're good.
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I'd throw my hat into the ring. If you look in Sidebar WTF (or my topics list) there's a bunch of my own WTFs in there which gives you a pretty good idea of my writing style.
I tend to stretch them out a bit for dramatic licence but that's certainly something I can change up or down to suit.
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I want to be the next writer, but I can't actually write good stuff. What can I do?
It seems unfair that you discriminate against people who can't write just because the job is about writing. Would you accept MS paint drawings instead? Or maybe versions of FizzBuzz written in esoteric programming languages. I'm pretty flexible in that regard.
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Would you accept MS paint drawings instead? Or maybe versions of FizzBuzz written in esoteric programming languages.
Why not both? It's FizzBuzz written in an esoteric programming language that's also an image!
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I have emailed my submission, but based on the above I am pretty sure it wont go well for me.
Your submission was first class. It was immediately clear what you were trying to get across.
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I want to be the next writer, but I can't actually write good stuff. What can I do?
Give it a shot! Attitude and drive is 90% of what we do around here. Worst case, I'll give you feedback on what to improve upon.
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Give it a shot! Attitude and drive is 90% of what we do around here.
See, that is the problem. 90% of what I do is slack. Some of us grew up in the 90s, you know.
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Would you accept MS paint drawings instead?
I've heard they once hired a guy based on that. It ended with a two-season series of comics.
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I've sent mine in. I'm not sure it's my best work - but I'm not my best self judge - and to be fair the source material does actually kind of suck
I will probably post it here at some point, in case anyone's curious.
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See, that is the problem. 90% of what I do is slack. Some of us grew up in the 90s, you know.
Some of us misspent our 90s era youth writing terribad games on 80s era machines.
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The community would probably Â
likeÂnot revolt not disappear if @Arantor were a contributor.
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See, that is the problem. 90% of what I do is slack. Some of us grew up in the 90s, you know.
Growing up in the 80s still means that 90% is slacking. It's just that the other 90% is hard work…
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I also gotta be honest- I'd love an article that's a collection of FizzBuzzes written in esoteric programming languages.
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Isn't that what the comments in the normal FizzBuzz-articles are for?
Filed Under: Are you trying to one-up the comenteers? That can only go wrong! | Commenteers sounds wrong and right at the same time. It's probably wrong but I am sticking with it!
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300-500 range
TRWTF is 300-500 what? words? letter? paragraphs? pages?
Yes I'm betting words.
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Dollars.
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How about Tricky Dicky Fun Bucks?
Also, you did get my submission, yes?
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Tricky Dicky Fun Bucks
Thanks! Just in time. I spent all mine on coffee.
Also, you did get my submission, yes?
Yessir. Receipt...acknowledged.
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Awesome, thanks. I was getting a... little... concerned that it had gotten lost in the etherwebs. I never trust email to actually get there.
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i am ashamed to say i played on that mistrust at Uni.
writing assignemnt is not done by due date, pipe ~3MB from /dev/urandom to myAssignment.doc and email it to professor. then rush to finish the assignment before i get the email saying that my first one arrived corrupt.
This is a thing i did multiple times and i am ashamed of each and every single one of them.
I violated the trust of the internet and i shall be punished for it eventually.
hmm.... actually i bet that could be turned into an interesting Hanzo story....,
@algorythmics, et.al. I give my permission to hanzoize that to [afterlife: bad end] and back!
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writing assignemnt is not done by due date, pipe ~3MB from /dev/urandom to myAssignment.doc and email it to professor.
That old trick, from Sun Tzu's Art of War, eh?
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hmm.. i could have sworn it was from the book of five rings myself...
but either way yep. that's an old trick. doesn't work on comp sci professors tho. they know that trick too well.
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How about the Book of Twenty Rings?
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never heard of it. is it related to the eightfold path?
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never heard of it. is it related to the eightfold path?
I'm sure you've heard of it. Major films were made of it.
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I know what it is because I am awesome. I will keep quiet.
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but either way yep. that's an old trick. doesn't work on comp sci professors tho. they know that trick too well.
The trick there is to uuencode it with a nonstandard encoding. "Check out my base65-encoded file!"