Bash.org IRC snippets
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Ok, I found this site in a random reddit thread.
Had no idea this existed. Some pretty damn hilarious chat snippets, going back decades. They are all ranked like reddit, click on "top" for the best ones. Few of my favorites from the "top" list:
<Cthon98> hey, if you type in your pw, it will show as stars <Cthon98> ********* see! <AzureDiamond> hunter2 <AzureDiamond> doesnt look like stars to me <Cthon98> <AzureDiamond> ******* <Cthon98> thats what I see <AzureDiamond> oh, really? <Cthon98> Absolutely <AzureDiamond> you can go hunter2 my hunter2-ing hunter2 <AzureDiamond> haha, does that look funny to you? <Cthon98> lol, yes. See, when YOU type hunter2, it shows to us as ******* <AzureDiamond> thats neat, I didnt know IRC did that <Cthon98> yep, no matter how many times you type hunter2, it will show to us as ******* <AzureDiamond> awesome! <AzureDiamond> wait, how do you know my pw? <Cthon98> er, I just copy pasted YOUR ******'s and it appears to YOU as hunter2 cause its your pw <AzureDiamond> oh, ok.
t0rbad> so there i was in this hallway right BlackAdder> i believe i speak for all of us when i say... BlackAdder> WRONG BTICH BlackAdder> IM SICK OF YOU BlackAdder> AND YOUR LAME STORIES BlackAdder> NOBODY HERE THINKS YOURE FUNNY BlackAdder> NOBODY HERE WANTS TO HEAR YOUR STORIES BlackAdder> IN FACT BlackAdder> IF YOU DIED RIGHT NOW BlackAdder> I DONT THINK NOBODY WOULD CARE BlackAdder> SO WHAT DO YOU SAY TO THAT FAG *** t0rbad sets mode: +b BlackAdder*!*@*.* *** BlackAdder has been kicked my t0rbad ( ) t0rbad> so there i was in this hallway right CRCError> right heartless> Right. r3v> right
<tatclass> YOU ALL SUCK DICK <tatclass> er. <tatclass> hi. <andy\code> A common typo. <tatclass> the keys are like right next to each other.
<DeadMansHand> haha, last night, me and pete went out to celebrate his engagement and got hugely drunk <DeadMansHand> we got this great idea to bury eachother in the sand close to the water and see who would chicken out first <DeadMansHand> took about a half hour, but the water got up to my face so i freaked and got out <DeadMansHand> i looked around for pete and he must've chickened out before me and stumbled home or something heh <DeadMansHand> What'd he say when he woke up this morning? <Thirteen-> uhh.. he hasn't come home yet.. i thought he was staying with you? <DeadMansHand> holy fuck. <DeadMansHand> i fucking hope im wrong about what im thinking right now <DeadMansHand> im fucking going back to the beach to make sure <DeadMansHand> if he gets home, call me, i don't want to be worrying about this <Thirteen-> will do. you better hope he's not still buried, you'll be in deep shit. quit: (DeadMansHand) <Tyran> wtf? pete came home last night you fuck. Ken's going to be worrying about this shit all day <Thirteen-> haha yea, but it will be fun while it lasts join: (PeteRepeat) (bob@3F8C4655.11D1C8C.18637D35.IP) <PeteRepeat> fucking ken <PeteRepeat> ken... that fucker buried me in the sand last night, i ran off about 5 minutes to it, left him there to be an idiot <quiqsilver> pete, ken didn't come back last night, i thought he was with you. <PeteRepeat> oh fuck. <PeteRepeat> if ken shows up, make sure he doesn't know that im at the beach digging for his body. i don't want him to think i care or anything. quit: (PeteRepeat) <Thirteen-> rofl. Those 2 are going to get a huge surprise when they meet at the beach. <Tyran> i can't beleive how perfect their timing was
<Khassaki> HI EVERYBODY!!!!!!!!!! <Judge-Mental> try pressing the the Caps Lock key <Khassaki> O THANKS!!! ITS SO MUCH EASIER TO WRITE NOW!!!!!!! <Judge-Mental> fuck me
* ab is away - gone, if anyone talks in the next 25 minutes as me it's bm being an asshole - <ab> HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS
<mage> what should I give sister for unzipping? <Kevyn> Um. Ten bucks? <mage> no I mean like, WinZip?
<JonTG> Man, my penis is so big if I laid it out on a keyboard it'd go all the way from A to Z <JonTG> wait, shit
I skipped over some of the longer ones, definitely check it out, worth a read.
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This site is old. Welcome to the internet.
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I've seen some of these before, but that beach one and the capslock one are awesome. In fact, I think [this one] (http://bash.org/?414593) fits this site rather too well.
Some time later:
Wow, they even have one of my favorites of all time! [Aight, I put on my robe and wizard hat.] (http://bash.org/?104383) Almost certainly submitted by a 1d4chan user, or someone on this bash.org submitted it there.
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http://qdb.us has a bunch, too
I'm on one of those sites, can't remember which
EDIT: I'm on qdb, not bash
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This site is old. Welcome to the internet.
Yeah. "You know that new hot thing called Geocities? I heard you can have, like, your own Internet site!".
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I take it you missed the various hunter2 comments that pop up from time to time. At least now when you come across one you know what it is referencing I guess.
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Ah, the 90s and early 2000s, the days of geocities and angelfire, the only place to get obscure mugen characters. The blink tags! *dies*
Also, I wonder [how often this happens] (http://bash.org/?50891), because I'm pretty sure I heard my cousin mention it happening in her class about a decade ago.
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The blink tags!
My buddies and I played some obscure and horribly-implemented browser-based MUD in those days. It was quite vulnerable to HTML injection, and so it was very common for users to intentionally "say" something which ended with a <blink> or <marquee> tag, and no closing tag, causing all the page content after the message to do painful things.
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http://qdb.us has a bunch, too
Currently down, it seems.
The blink tags! dies
What, you didn't get the memo?
@Lorne Kates, post:-1, topic:-1 said:
<blink> and you're dead.
My buddies and I played some obscure and horribly-implemented browser-based MUD in those days. It was quite vulnerable to HTML injection, and so it was very common for users to intentionally "say" something which ended with a <blink> or <marquee> tag, and no closing tag, causing all the page content after the message to do painful things.
<Lt_Tinkle> lolololololol <Lt_Tinkle> i have my mincraft log viewable as a webpage <Lt_Tinkle> and someone did html injection <Lt_Tinkle> by talking inside minecraft <Lt_Tinkle> and made it redirect to meatspin <Lt_Tinkle> when i find out who it was <Lt_Tinkle> i shall make them an op
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You just now found Hunter2? You just now found bash.org!?
I don't believe this one bit. I think you just wanted to make a thread here people would comment on.
Well it's not going to wor-- damnit!
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Currently down, it seems.
Whoa, didn't even look at it originally. Hmmm, not sure if that's "down"
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Whoa, didn't even look at it originally. Hmmm, not sure if that's "down"
They tend to disappear for a month or so and then return. DNS issues, it seems.
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Or it's still hosted on a machine from 1971.
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They tend to disappear for a month or so and then return. DNS issues, it seems.
Yeah, the two sites seems to be in flux. bash.org didn't update for what seemed like years, and qdb.us was following suit, but started updating with a ton of new quotes. It was only recently that bash.org started updating again. I was used to checking it about once a month and seeing that stupid "damn, my land mine collection is gone" quote.
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Guys, this is bad, this is going to eat up so much of my time. I mean, [they even have things that are very real and historically accurate] (http://bash.org/?262417) while still being incredibly funny.
Honestly, I am in awe of some of these people. They manage the kind of [comebacks] (http://bash.org/?126218) you only manage once in a lifetime.
There are even rather honorable people, willing to [bow out when they know they've lost] (http://bash.org/?870063), which is particularly unusual on the internet (and moreso here ofc). Though, this guy had lost by his second line. Not a bit of rhythm.
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Seriously? Did I just fall into some kind of time machine that took me back to 2002?
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Honestly, I am in awe of some of these people. They manage the kind of comebacks you only manage once in a lifetime.
You believe all of the things on Bash.org aren't just joke scenarios that people created to submit to Bash.org?
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well, i'd say about 5% of them are real, and the rest made up or front pagified.
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well, i'd say about 5% of them are real, and the rest made up or front pagified.
Which is much higher than most user-contribution sites.
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You just now found Hunter2? You just now found bash.org!?
I don't believe this one bit. I think you just wanted to make a thread here people would comment on.
Well it's not going to wor-- damnit!
I honestly had no idea this existed. Sure I vaguely remember some of the stories from random places on the internet, but most of them are new for me.
I bet you're super jelly right now that I get to consume all these for the first time.
This site is old. Welcome to the internet.
Actually, I found it in the "old-ass sites" reddit thread.
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Have you heard about homestarrunner yet?
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Have you heard about homestarrunner yet?
Hey, have you contributed money to save the Pacific Tree Octopus?
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Is that like Cthulhu?
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Is that like Codethulhu?
FTFS
edit: or would
Ftang! Ftang!
have been better?hmm....
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No. It's not. It's another ancient internet joke.
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edit: or would Ftang! Ftang! have been better?
Fhtagn would have been better, but at least you were close.
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Also, I wonder how often this happens, because I'm pretty sure I heard my cousin mention it happening in her class about a decade ago.
I first heard it nearly 20 years ago, before the internet was even a household thing.I feel old. :⎛
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<Lan_> my iq is a range of 145-178
<kender> is that in kelvin?
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<Khassaki> HI EVERYBODY!!!!!!!!!!
<Judge-Mental> try pressing the the Caps Lock key
<Khassaki> O THANKS!!! ITS SO MUCH EASIER TO WRITE NOW!!!!!!!
<Judge-Mental> fuck meBWAHAHAHAHA! Unintended consequences.`
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Link plz kthxbye.
http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/2o90y2/reddit_what_is_your_favorite_dead_website/
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http://qdb.us has a bunch, too
404_SITE_NOT_FOUND.
[root@thinkpad Downloads]# dig qdb.us @8.8.8.8 ; <<>> DiG 9.9.3-P2 <<>> qdb.us @8.8.8.8 ;; global options: +cmd ;; Got answer: ;; ->>HEADER<<- opcode: QUERY, status: NOERROR, id: 32806 ;; flags: qr rd ra; QUERY: 1, ANSWER: 0, AUTHORITY: 1, ADDITIONAL: 1 ;; OPT PSEUDOSECTION: ; EDNS: version: 0, flags:; udp: 512 ;; QUESTION SECTION: ;qdb.us. IN A ;; AUTHORITY SECTION: qdb.us. 697 IN SOA ns1.dreamhost.com. hostmaster.dreamhost.com. 2014120400 16158 1800 1814400 14400 ;; Query time: 16 msec ;; SERVER: 8.8.8.8#53(8.8.8.8) ;; WHEN: Fri Dec 05 10:46:55 GMT 2014 ;; MSG SIZE rcvd: 99 [root@thinkpad Downloads]#
Also, I wonder how often this happens, because I'm pretty sure I heard my cousin mention it happening in her class about a decade ago.
Then the teacher said, because you taste sweetness with the front of your tongue, not the part of your tongue back in your throat
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tongue_map
The tongue map or taste map is a common misconception that different sections of the tongue are exclusively responsible for different basic tastes
Hey, have you contributed money to save the Pacific Tree Octopus?
- dihydrogen monoxide
- Time Cube
- goatse.cx
- Acts of Gord
- Rotten.com
So many new old things for you to look at cartman...
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Don't forget the BOFH
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Hey, have you contributed money to save the Pacific Tree Octopus?
Oddly, my kids brought this up just last night... teacher gave a "quiz" on which of these three internet things is real...
mini-IJIJ: "No, Dad, it's real!"
IJIJ: "I know it is."
mini-IJIJ: "You do?"
IJIJ: "Yes. The PTO is, in fact, a real internet hoax."I'm never entirely sure they've heard the teachers entirely right, or whether they're pulling my leg.
Just like around here.
Filed under: I also pretend that I think they watch "Poke-man" while they discuss the fact that the new ones suck, but the old, classic ones are OK.
You never even lived in the 20th century. Classic?
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Don't forget the BOFH
ah, an absolute classic! they're still being published today, although they have kind of jumped the shark.
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The tongue map or taste map is a common misconception that different sections of the tongue are exclusively responsible for different basic tastes
When I heard the story, it went that the teacher said something like "only your tongue can taste, not the back of your throat".
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dihydrogen monoxide
Time Cube
goatse.cx
Acts of Gord
Rotten.comI know about all of these, but I had never heard of the Pacific Tree Octopus until this thread.
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oh hai, that thing posted up-thread
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oh hai, that thing posted up-thread
sammy: Okay..being a mod is like playing Sims because you have all this power...you create a world for your people...you try to make it safe...happy...you monitor it to stop problems...you check their needs and try to meet them...but no matter what you do, sooner or later people are going to stand around waving their arms and yelling illegibly about something you've done wrong.
<TheBeeSingsWithMalice> And then you start herding them into the pool and taking out the ladders...
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hey, it's back!
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new old things
Zombo.com
MahirI seem to remember a website called "peiceofshit" (remember because of the misspelling) that was a fake news article were you could insert a friend's name, but I can't find any reference to it anymore.
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