Today I would like to talk about bad coding. Not the kind where you write bad code. The Soviet Russian kind. Where the bad code writes you. badly.
I despise this kind of code. Normally code has to be inside a medical device of piece of critical equipment to kill you. This kind will try it's best if it's in an ASCII art tic tac toe game.
This kind of bad code is what you are doing when you are in the "Code Mode"
What is the code mode?
(compiled from myself 5+ years ago, horror stories and random anecdotes, and forum postings)
The code mode is 7:30 AM after 18 hours coding.
The code mode is anytime you regret an act of coding.
The code mode is struggling to explain the useless project you call "fun" to others when you secretly know you would rather be doing something else(programming or not)
The code mode is a walk through nature rudely interrupted by a thought of the next great feature in your program which consumes your thoughts for the rest of the day.
The code mode is when someone notices you seem distant and distracted, and you realized you were coding in your head,
The code mode is that book you want to read but can't because you are busy coding and can't stop.
The code mode is when code directly or indirectly makes you cry real tears, and a lack of backup software wasn't involved.
The code mode is when you rush and hurry to finish a hobby project when there is no deadline.
The code mode is feeling like you have to finish a project you hate, when you are the only one who even knows about it.
The code mode is tearing your hair out and feeling like the code is quicksand and you are digging yourself in.
The code mode is when it feels like you are in prison, and the cell is wallpapered with your code.
The code mode is when you wonder if there is a rehab for code addiction.
The code mode is when you actually stay home to code instead of going out.
The code mode is when you don't have a life, and suspect code might be to blame.
The code mode is when you take a break and the whole world seems like a better place.
Don't get in the code mode. The code mode is evil and wants to kill you. Code all you like. Code 8+ hours a day for a living and have multiple hobby projects.
Code useless stuff just for fun. Code whatever you want. Just stay outta that code mode. The code mode will only lead to pain.