I'm about to pick on an indie game, so prepare to hate me



  • Hotline Miami is a buggy, broken, piece of shit. Utter shit. Broken beyond belief.

    So anyway, Hotline Miami is a new hot indie game which is known for having great music. A friend of mine was kind enough to gift me a copy so I attempted to run it... the first thing that happens when you run it off Steam is the C++ redist installer runs even though it's already installed (forcing me to do a pointless "repair" install just to get past it). Bad omens. But it got worse when I actually booted up the game:

    What? The fuck? Is this? What does it mean? How do I fix it? What are the implications of ignoring it? What are the implications of aborting? (Protip: as far as I can tell, the same thing happens either way.) Is this not the worst error dialog in the history of error dialogs? Lemme tell you, this one gives Lotus Notes' "variant does not contain an object" a run for its money.

    Anyway, because of that error I don't get any sounds. For a game that's famous for its music. None. The title screen shows and I'm able to play a little bit of the tutorial-- albeit with no sounds-- so I figure ok, let's dig into the support thread and see how to resolve this problem.

    And I find this article. The print spooler? Your video game is somehow incompatible with the bog-standard Windows print spooler? You never once tried testing the game on a computer with a printer plugged in? YOU HAVE GOT TO BE SHITTING ME. This has to be some kind of complicated gag, right? Like if I leave the error message up long enough the game goes, "just kidding!" and runs correctly? No? Jesus.

    Oh and they had some problems with Steam compatibility, despite releasing the program on Steam. So: 1) the Steam overlay doesn't run (but it apparently does report achievements-- you just can't see the achievements because the overlay isn't running.) 2) every time you start up the game it asks you if you want to use Steamworks. Because their Steam integration is so buggy apparently even just using it causes some people's saved games to disappear for no reason.

    Some people couldn't walk down stairways or the game crashes. Some people can't use a specific gun because as soon as they fire it the game crashes. Some people experience crashes when glass breaks. (The developer posted in another thread that it's prone to crashing when too many sounds happen simultaneously... on computers with effectively infinite sound channels!) Some people can't complete level 3, or 10, or 14 because the game crashes. Some people can't enter the car on any level or the game crashes. The game crashes for Windows 8 users, Windows 7 users, Windows Vista users, both 32 and 64-bit. The game crashes regardless of your graphics card or driver version or CPU speed or number of cores. Some people can't even get past the loading splash screen. Most people can't get achievements to register, even when playing with Steamworks turned on. What. A. Piece. Of. Shit.

    An interesting tidbit that came out of reading that thread is that Hotline Miami is made in Gamemaker, a program which is apparently a twice-boiled piece of shit. Now I know what NOT to use when making games.

    Well anyway. It looks like some people are having luck if they reboot their computer after installing. (Reboot to install a program? In 2013? YOU HAVE GOT TO BE SHITTING ME AGAIN RIGHT!) So let's try that and...

    The sound bug isn't fixed and as an added bonus, now the title screen is in Russian. YOU HAVE GOT TO BE SHITTING ME!



  • @blakeyrat said:

    What? The fuck? Is this? What does it mean?
    @blakeyrat said:
    that Hotline Miami is made in Gamemaker
    @blakeyrat said:
    How do I fix it?
    you install the thing that contains the dll that contains the external function which failed to load, obviously, duh!@blakeyrat said:
    What are the implications of ignoring it? What are the implications of aborting?
    sound not working, obviously, duh...@blakeyrat said:
    Is this not the worst error dialog in the history of error dialogs?
    not really, if you have the access to the source co... file. the thing is, 1. these error dialogs were never (I assume) meant to be seen by the end user, 2. the dev has no way to find out anything more specific about the error by code.@blakeyrat said:
    The print spooler? Your video game is somehow incompatible with the bog-standard Windows print spooler? You never once tried testing the game on a computer with a printer plugged in? YOU HAVE GOT TO BE SHITTING ME.
    now this is some quality WTF@blakeyrat said:
    Now I know what NOT to use when making games.
    you needed a specific game to inform you that Game Maker is the worst option if you want to make a game to actually sell? now that's some WTF, on par with not knowing that Frontpage is the worst option if you want to make a good website. Well, second worst, right after Flash. @blakeyrat said:
    The sound bug isn't fixed and as an added bonus, now the title screen is in Russian. YOU HAVE GOT TO BE SHITTING ME!
    i agree, pretty amusing.



  • Hah, before this page even loaded I was going to say "I wonder if he means Hotline Miami".

    I saw this game crash on a Giantbomb quicklook (once) but I never had any similar experiences, it was 100% stable. The game is so good it could crash every level and I'd still forgive it. The fact that it was made in GameMaker doesn't bother me since plenty of other more stable games have been built in it and, quite frankly, many less stable games have been built with better.

    Regarding the print spooler, I don't blame them. I don't have a printer plugged in, nor do most of the laptops my friends test my games on. It certainly isn't something the game should care about, but not something I would consider testing with on my games.

    The title screen remark is a bit of a low blow since it's supposed to be in Russian. The game is about a hitman being contracted to kill russian mobsters in Miami! I can't tell if you're being facetious or presumptuous at this point. Because you're confusing intentional presentation with mistakes. Next you'll complain that the graphics are all pixelated (also intentional).

    As you've stated, this was an indie venture and (from what I've heard) built rather quickly. It has its warts, but they're far outweighed by it's pluses. I'd say the solution is get a better computer. That isn't a coy recommendation, it's an order, just get a better damn computer so you can play this game because it's fucking great. If you don't believe me, watch the Giantbomb quicklook. If you still don't agree, then I'm sure you're some asshat who's only video game purchases are from the EA Sports lineup.

    Hotline Miami Quicklook



  • @Soviut said:

    Hotline Miami Quicklook
     

    This?

    This?

    This is the game?

    This college media project with a "fantastic" soundtrack that is actually nothing but just-reasonable electro?

    Is this some elaborate joke? Are all game reviewers banding together trying to troll the public?

    Wow.

    @Soviut said:
    it's fucking great.
    I think the title screen messed up your brain.

     

     

     

     



  • @SEMI-HYBRID code said:

    the thing is, 1. these error dialogs were never (I assume) meant to be understood by anyone other than the person who created that error message, so the text is completely meaningful solely to that individual alone and any effort to provide more detailed/verbose explanations in the dialogue in the unlikely event of someone else encountering that dialogue is a complete unnecessary waste of time.
     

    FTFY. I hate this "oh, *I* know what it means, don't worry about it" lazy/secretive antipattern.



  • @Soviut said:

    apologetic fan fiction deleted
    Come again? Buy a better computer FOR A GAME? Are you stark raving mad? I'm not often on blakeyrat's side, but the description is one of a seriously bad piece of programming.

    If you ask a programmer "Make the app crash when the printer spooler is active", he's going to have a hard time doing it differently than this:

    [code]

    if (printerSpoolerActive()) *((char*)NULL) = 0;

    [/code]



  • @Soviut said:

    I'd say the solution is get a better computer....

    ...just get a better damn computer so you can play this game because it's fucking great.

     

    <Blakey>Blame the users, blame the users, blame the users.... hey, how come we have no users left?</Rat>



  • MEGA-POST

    @SEMI-HYBRID code said:

    you needed a specific game to inform you that Game Maker is the worst option if you want to make a game to actually sell?

    It's called hyperbole. Please allow me to use literary devices, as if I were speaking to an audience of people who were not pedantic dickweeds. I know I'm not, but, please: let me have my dream.

    @Soviut said:

    I saw this game crash on a Giantbomb quicklook (once) but I never had any similar experiences, it was 100% stable.

    I presume it works for people who have identical computers to the ones they developed it on, and nobody else.

    @Soviut said:

    The game is so good it could crash every level and I'd still forgive it.

    The one level I played before giving up on this piece of shit was awful. It was just insta-death, insta-death, insta-death. What did I do wrong to cause the death? Game doesn't tell me. Do the same thing again? Now it works somehow. WTF.

    @Soviut said:

    The title screen remark is a bit of a low blow since it's supposed to be in Russian.

    Then how come the first time it started, before I re-installed it, it was in English? Either it was buggy then, or it's buggy now.

    @Soviut said:

    It has its warts,

    Yeah, like, for example: IT DOESN'T FUCKING WORK.

    What is it with people on this board defending BROKEN SOFTWARE? Stop it. It's broken. They took my friend's money and delivered NOTHING to me. He spent money and got NOTHING in return. And you're ok with that? FUCK YOU. I don't care if the game had a low budget, I don't care if it was made by 2 poor guys, I don't care if they had no fingers and had to make the game solely by tapping their nose on a touchscreen, THEY STOLE MONEY FROM MY FRIEND AND THAT IS WRONG.

    That is not ok.

    @Soviut said:

    I'd say the solution is get a better computer.

    Oh fucking please. The developer said in one of those Steam threads it runs best at 1600x900. My computer has 1920x1200. Now maybe I'm an idiot, but I'd call my main monitor "better". They said it might have issues with multiple monitors. My computer has two monitors. I'd call two monitors "better" than one.

    If you define "better" as "can run Hotline Miami", then I assume a "better" computer than my gaming monster which can render Skyrim frames faster than my fucking LCD monitor can even respond is inferior to a $499 Walmart special laptop.

    @Soviut said:

    If you still don't agree, then I'm sure you're some asshat who's only video game purchases are from the EA Sports lineup.

    I hate you so much.

    @Cassidy said:

    @Soviut said:
    I'd say the solution is get a better computer....

    ...just get a better damn computer so you can play this game because it's fucking great.

    <Blakey>Blame the users, blame the users, blame the users.... hey, how come we have no users left?</Rat>

    Soviut, even Cassidy thinks you're an idiot. You know how much of an idiot you have to be for that to happen? 12. 12 of an idiot.



  • Are they using a dot matrix printer as a debug console? 



  • @dhromed said:

    @Soviut said:

    Hotline Miami Quicklook
     

    This?

    This?

    This is the game?

    This college media project with a "fantastic" soundtrack that is actually nothing but just-reasonable electro?

    Is this some elaborate joke? Are all game reviewers banding together trying to troll the public?

    Wow.

    @Soviut said:
    it's fucking great.
    I think the title screen messed up your brain.

    It's a lot of fun, what can I say. Difficult as hell, good mechanics, really creepy take on the retro-style aesthetic (feels like the whole thing is being played off a worn out betamax tape), and the storyline is this deeper and deeper fever dream of the main character. And the soundtrack is an unlikely pairing, but it works really well and if you actually played the game, you'd hear that it isn't all electro.



  • GameMaker? <gag> GameMaker + Steam? <coughs up blood>

    Seriously, GameMaker is a POS. The engine itself sucks, and the games made with it usually sucks worse. It used to be that people had to code their own engines, and if they can't code worth shit they can't make a good game. Now you've got a crappy engine that runs AND people can make crap on. Same deal for Unity.

    Why does the game require MSVC runtime? GameMaker is Delphi based, and most Delphi programs I've seen links its own runtime statically.

    (Oh yeah, GameMaker also does not allow the final game to be modded. That means no fixing problems on your own, and relying on a developer who may or may not care.)



  • @Soviut said:

    It's a lot of fun, what can I say. Difficult as hell, good mechanics, really creepy take on the retro-style aesthetic (feels like the whole thing is being played off a worn out betamax tape), and the storyline is this deeper and deeper fever dream of the main character.

    And so it's ok that they stole money from my friend! YAY! Let's all dance and sing in happy-land! Some dumbshit who is an Cassidy-approved idiot likes the game so it's ok for the game's developers to take people's money and deliver non-working bullshit!

    Thanks for clearing that up.



  • @blakeyrat said:

    @Soviut said:
    It's a lot of fun, what can I say. Difficult as hell, good mechanics, really creepy take on the retro-style aesthetic (feels like the whole thing is being played off a worn out betamax tape), and the storyline is this deeper and deeper fever dream of the main character.

    And so it's ok that they stole money from my friend! YAY! Let's all dance and sing in happy-land! Some dumbshit who is an Cassidy-approved idiot likes the game so it's ok for the game's developers to take people's money and deliver non-working bullshit!

    Thanks for clearing that up.

    No, it's not okay. I'm saying that the game is worth it if you can get it working. I'm not defending poorly written code, I'm defending the game itself.



  • @Soviut said:

    I'm not defending poorly written code, I'm defending the game itself.

    The game IS the poorly-written code! What kind of weird ass meta-physical trick are you trying to pull here?



  • If "hotline" in Russian is really "Goryachaya Liniya," I think they should go for a less literal translation. That's the real WTF here.



  • @GMMan said:

    ... (Oh yeah, GameMaker also does not allow the final game to be modded. That means no fixing problems on your own, and relying on a developer who may or may not care.)

    As opposed to all other games that come with the source code, a book on c++, a book on whatever apis they used, a compiler and a written offer to get paid a bajillion bucks if you fix the game for them?



  • @henke37 said:

    @GMMan said:
    ... (Oh yeah, GameMaker also does not allow the final game to be modded. That means no fixing problems on your own, and relying on a developer who may or may not care.)

    As opposed to all other games that come with the source code, a book on c++, a book on whatever apis they used, a compiler and a written offer to get paid a bajillion bucks if you fix the game for them?



    At least a lot of the other games are compiled into native code that you can patch if necessary, and their assets are stored in packs or laid flat.

    Sidenote: Blitz powered games compile into the worst assembly ever. Allocating space on the stack involves 1000 "push eax" statements instead of a loop or "sub esp,x" and memset. BlitzMax compiles into not so horrible, but still quite unoptimized code.


  • Trolleybus Mechanic

    @blakeyrat said:

    @Soviut said:

    I'd say the solution is get a better computer.

    Oh fucking please. The developer said in one of those Steam threads it runs best at 1600x900. My computer has 1920x1200. Now maybe I'm an idiot, but I'd call my main monitor "better". They said it might have issues with multiple monitors. My computer has two monitors. I'd call two monitors "better" than one.

    If you define "better" as "can run Hotline Miami", then I assume a "better" computer than my gaming monster which can render Skyrim frames faster than my fucking LCD monitor can even respond is inferior to a $499 Walmart special laptop.

     

    I assume "better" in this context is to go buy a computer that doesn't have a printer installed.

    Obviously.

     


  • Garbage Person

    @Soviut said:

    Regarding the print spooler, I don't blame them. I don't have a printer plugged in, nor do most of the laptops my friends test my games on. It certainly isn't something the game should care about, but not something I would consider testing with on my games.
    I don't have a printer plugged in, either. Fuck, I work in a printing plant and I don't even have a workgroup printer ("Excuse me, I need you to interrupt production on your 40 foot long gazillion dollar color production digital press for ten minutes, and reconfigure the whole machine for me so I can print a 10 page glossy report for a senior manager. No, it's not revenue work. Yes I'm serious.")

    But every single computer I've touched in AGES has had the print spooler installed and running - because of the bog standard Microsoft XPS Writer thingamabob that nobody in the right mind uses for anything ever. Or because they have a PDF Printer installed. Or some ridiculous laptop manufacturer thought it'd be cute to include a modem with fax drivers because we still live in the 90's (bonus WTF: our office fax machine is an add-on module to a production press, which is HILARIOUS)



  • @blakeyrat said:

    @Soviut said:
    I'm not defending poorly written code, I'm defending the game itself.

    The game IS the poorly-written code! What kind of weird ass meta-physical trick are you trying to pull here?

    I'm saying that while the code may be poorly written, the game itself is good. Just like so many horribly written apps out there manage to hold aloft billion dollar companies. Do I agree with this? Do I like that people can't play a game I think is great? Of course not. However, for those of us who can play it, it's excellent.

    Like I said, I've played way worse written with far better tools, languages, etc. If you think this game is poorly written, go talk to anyone who codes for EA sports games. Those things have to be churned out every year and their idea of sharing libraries is to copy and paste code and hammer at it until it works.



  • @blakeyrat said:

    Oh fucking please. The developer said in one of those Steam threads it runs best at 1600x900. My computer has 1920x1200. Now maybe I'm an idiot, but I'd call my main monitor "better". They said it might have issues with multiple monitors. My computer has two monitors. I'd call two monitors "better" than one.

    Funny, I'm running it at 1920 x 1200 with dual monitors. And I can enable steamworks stuff.

    http://img24.imageshack.us/img24/8056/hotlinemiamiresolution.png

    @blakeyrat said:

    If you define "better" as "can run Hotline Miami", then I assume a "better" computer than my gaming monster which can render Skyrim frames faster than my fucking LCD monitor can even respond is inferior to a $499 Walmart special laptop

    Uh, maybe? Hotline Miami doesn't require that much horsepower, just less walmarty parts I guess. As I recall, I'm running an i7 2600, 16GB of RAM (yeah, this baller shelled out almost 80 bucks!), a Radeon 6800 series card that I literally said "gimme a video card that's around 150 bucks" to the guy at the store and a bog-standard motherboard that cost less than 100 bucks to run it all. Sure, it cost more than the $500 walmart laptop, but not by much. And in case you're wondering, I do a lot of graphic work and rendering, hence the extra ram.



  • "Maybe"? If Hotline Miami needs more power than Skyrim, something is seriously wrong.
    Though that's already been established by the fact that it hates print spooling.



  • @Cassidy said:

    @SEMI-HYBRID code said:

    the thing is, 1. these error dialogs were never (I assume) meant to be understood by anyone other than the person who created that error message, so the text is completely meaningful solely to that individual alone and any effort to provide more detailed/verbose explanations in the dialogue in the unlikely event of someone else encountering that dialogue is a complete unnecessary waste of time.
     

    FTFY. I hate this "oh, I know what it means, don't worry about it" lazy/secretive antipattern.

    except in normal cases the creator of the error message is the creator of the software. in this case, it is the creator of the (let's call it) engine, and dev really has no practical way of providing any more information. i know it doesn't change anything about the anti-pattern-ness of the message, but YoyoGames is to blame, not the actual dev of the game.

    not sure if it has a name, I think it doesn't. any ideas on how it should be called? maybe "you're not privileged to know what error occured" or something along those lines?



  • @blakeyrat said:

    @SEMI-HYBRID code said:
    you needed a specific game to inform you that Game Maker is the worst option if you want to make a game to actually sell?

    It's called hyperbole. Please allow me to use literary devices, as if I were speaking to an audience of people who were not pedantic dickweeds. I know I'm not, but, please: let me have my dream.

    and the thing I used is called rhetorical question. It's that thing when you ask a question not because you want an answer, but to prove/express a point. Please allow others to use literally devices too. I know in your eyes everyone else is incapable of such elaborate use of language, but at least give us the benefit of not turning off your literary device detector by default.



  • @Salamander said:

    "Maybe"? If Hotline Miami needs more power than Skyrim, something is seriously wrong.

    Though that's already been established by the fact that it hates print spooling.

    Soviut is just being dumb and he knows it. Hotline Miami's problem has nothing to do with how fast your CPU is or how much memory it has, it has to do with there's a bug in it the developers are too incompetent to solve, and the tool they chose is too incompetent to provide them with enough information to easily solve it.

    I wouldn't even be surprised to learn, for example, that the print spooler thing is a complete red herring and it turns out the bug is due to a race condition-- the reason some people always get it is because they're running the game of SSDs which load faster and the reason other people don't is because their HD may or may not load fast enough to trigger it. But that's just a guess based on the thread reading I was doing Friday.



  • @SEMI-HYBRID code said:

    and dev really has no practical way of providing any more information.

    Does fault lie then with the engine creator not exposing more of the inner workings such that better-quality information can be retrieved?

    @SEMI-HYBRID code said:

    ...  not sure if it has a name, I think it doesn't. any ideas on how it should be called? maybe "you're not privileged to know what error occured" or something along those lines?
     

    "selfish dialogue".

    "need-to-know error"

    "confusion outweighs information"

    Dunno, really. I've frequently encountered this situation where meaningless (or inaccurate) data is actually more dangerous than no data but the originator doesn't seem to understand the consequences of their poor communication. I just thought it's got to have been a common enough problem that someone's already given it a term.



  • @blakeyrat said:

    @Salamander said:

    "Maybe"? If Hotline Miami needs more power than Skyrim, something is seriously wrong.

    Though that's already been established by the fact that it hates print spooling.

    Soviut is just being dumb and he knows it. Hotline Miami's problem has nothing to do with how fast your CPU is or how much memory it has, it has to do with there's a bug in it the developers are too incompetent to solve, and the tool they chose is too incompetent to provide them with enough information to easily solve it.

    I wouldn't even be surprised to learn, for example, that the print spooler thing is a complete red herring and it turns out the bug is due to a race condition-- the reason some people always get it is because they're running the game of SSDs which load faster and the reason other people don't is because their HD may or may not load fast enough to trigger it. But that's just a guess based on the thread reading I was doing Friday.

    How am I being dumb. I've already stated several times that I agree with you, the game is full of bugs. I've only ever defended the game itself, not the problems faced. And I never said you need fast hardware, just that maybe I got lucky with the "right" hardware is all.

    Also, I'm running the game off an SSD so I don't think it's that.



  • @Salamander said:

    "Maybe"? If Hotline Miami needs more power than Skyrim, something is seriously wrong.

    Though that's already been established by the fact that it hates print spooling.

    It doesn't. It needs very little horsepower to play. I just wasn't discounting your proposition because I haven't played the game on anything but my desktop system and it's fairly beefy compared to a walmart laptop that blakeyrat used as an example.



  • @blakeyrat said:

    Soviut, even Cassidy thinks you're an idiot. You know how much of an idiot you have to be for that to happen? 12. 12 of an idiot.
    Is that in metric or imperial idiot?



  • @TGV said:

    Come again? Buy a better computer FOR A GAME? Are you stark raving mad?
     

    In general, yes. All of my computer upgrades have been game-driven.

    For this game,

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHA

     

    HAHAHA

     

    HAHAHA

    HAHAAAAAAAAAHHAHAheuuhhuhacj ack cough cough



  • @Soviut said:

    And I never said you need fast hardware, just that maybe I got lucky with the "right" hardware is all.
     

    You said "better". In Computerland, that means higher specs.

    @Soviut said:

    the game is full of bugs.

    Ok, great.

    @Soviut said:

    I've only ever defended the game itself

    I think it's fine if people like a game. I think it's fine if people like a silly little amateuristic project such as this. It's probably not complete shit, excpet for the unplayable crashiness.

    I have a problem when it's falsely hyperboled into the high heavens as if it were some sort of awesome supergame which Hotline Miami obviously isn't, so that makes me think I am surrounded by pill-popping hallucinating imbeciles and that makes me sad. :(



  • @Anonymouse said:

    Is that in metric or imperial idiot?
     

    Yes.



  •  @dhromed said:

    that makes me think I am surrounded by pill-popping hallucinating imbeciles and that makes me sad. :(

    I know what you mean. Suddenly you realise everybody around you is popping pills like crazy, hallucinating shit and having generally an awesome time, while you're sitting wearing a suit and tie, being sober and wondering why the fuck nobody offered you any.

     



  • @Mo6eB said:

    Suddenly you realise everybody around you is popping pills like crazy, hallucinating shit and having generally an awesome time, while you're sitting wearing a suit and tie, being sober and wondering why the fuck nobody offered you any.
    Because who the fack wears a suit and tie to a rave?



  • @Soviut said:

    the game is full of bugs. I've only ever defended the game itself

    But but bu... bu... bu... those are the same... but...

    zzzt brain short-circuited



  • @blakeyrat said:

    @Soviut said:
    the game is full of bugs. I've only ever defended the game itself

    But but bu... bu... bu... those are the same... but...

    zzzt brain short-circuited


    I think the word here is "gameplay".


  • @GMMan said:

    I think the word here is "gameplay".

    Hm.

    Well for the tiny bit of it I was able to play the gameplay was shit. It was just dying randomly even though I did nothing obviously wrong. So I'm going back to "Soviut is a idiot and doesn't know what the hell he's talking about."



  •  I'm not sure how much of the wrong is Game Maker and how much is from the game itself. I've played a fun game in made Game Maker; it didn't break on launching, didn't have CPU problems (*cough*exceptthelastbos*cough*) and was free.

    So if a non-free game crashes like this, that shows incompetence on its programmer's part.



  • To be fair, I'm not trying to slag Game Maker. My only criticism of it is that its error messages are so fucking vague as to be utterly useless... to use my Twitter joke, they might as well replace the message with "don't work, fuck you" and it'd be just as useful and friendly.



  • @blakeyrat said:

    @GMMan said:
    I think the word here is "gameplay".

    Hm.

    Well for the tiny bit of it I was able to play the gameplay was shit. It was just dying randomly even though I did nothing obviously wrong. So I'm going back to "Soviut is a idiot and doesn't know what the hell he's talking about."

     

    He might be an idiot, I don't know for sure. Then again you might be too, since your in-game deaths might just be a lack of understanding of game mechanics. Again, I don't know since I haven't played this one.

    And I won't be playing this, because there's usually enough truth and objectivity in your R-rated rants that I'd believe you. Buying a game with install/first run headaches and random error messages should not happen these days unless you're trying to run it on a Pentium 133/Win95.

    Or a Linux box.

     


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @dhromed said:

    @Anonymouse said:

    Is that in metric or imperial idiot?
     

    Yes.

    "First one, then the other" is a much funnier answer.


  • BINNED

    I'd say the error message is excusable. It's totally worthless for the user but probably was intended for debugging only.
    And all software is buggy. Even blakey's. Some people have more money to spend on QA than others. And some companies still churn out shit. So a little debug console isn't that bad.

    The print spooler, on the other hand. What. The. Fuck? There is simply no possible way for this to make sense. None. Period.

    @blakeyrat said:

    You know how much of an idiot you have to be for that to happen? 12. 12 of an idiot.

    You made my day.



  • @Anonymouse said:

    @Mo6eB said:

    Suddenly you realise everybody around you is popping pills like crazy, hallucinating shit and having generally an awesome time, while you're sitting wearing a suit and tie, being sober and wondering why the fuck nobody offered you any.
    Because who the fack wears a suit and tie to a rave?

    It's okay.  He's wearing them ironically.

     



  • @dhromed said:

    I think it's fine if people like a silly little amateuristic project such as this. It's probably not complete shit, excpet for the unplayable crashiness.

    It's a great game and the playability is what makes it so much fun. There's a reason it's reviewed really well despite the bugs. But whatever, you've clearly made up your mind even before playing it.



  • @blakeyrat said:

    @GMMan said:
    I think the word here is "gameplay".

    Hm.

    Well for the tiny bit of it I was able to play the gameplay was shit. It was just dying randomly even though I did nothing obviously wrong. So I'm going back to "Soviut is a idiot and doesn't know what the hell he's talking about."

    Were you using the look ahead button? Did you make sound? All these things are explained in the game and that's where the mask mechanics and such come into play. The idea is to be stealthy, but agressive. Don't be too noisy, throw your weapons to stun enemies and look ahead down hallways rather than just running down them. Don't be spotted through glass walls, and kick through doors to knock down enemies, etc.

    The game sort of falls under a stealth puzzler with a bit of a massocore flavour (like super meat boy) with the fast level restarts and checkpoints. And I'm not usually for stealth games.



  • @Soviut said:

    Were you using the look ahead button?

    No?

    @Soviut said:

    Did you make sound?

    Hard to say SINCE THE BUGGY BROKEN GAME YOU KEEP DEFENDING BECAUSE YOU'RE AN IDIOT WHO I HATE HAS NO SOUND.

    @Soviut said:

    All these things are explained in the game

    Lies.



  • @SEMI-HYBRID code said:

    @blakeyrat said:
    How do I fix it?
    you install the thing that contains the dll that contains the external function which failed to load, obviously, duh!

    Comments like this piss me off no end - install the thing the GAME should have installed but didn't ?

    If an installer fails to install everything you need (or at least ensures all the prerequisites it needs is available on your system), then it's BROKEN. No excuses, no apologetics, no justifications. Just broken.



  • @daveime said:

    @SEMI-HYBRID code said:

    @blakeyrat said:
    How do I fix it?
    you install the thing that contains the dll that contains the external function which failed to load, obviously, duh!

    Comments like this piss me off no end - install the thing the GAME should have installed but didn't ?

     

    His comment was in jest. Broken installers piss all of us off.

    (some more than others)

     



  • Game Maker is evil. Friend of mine thought he was a hotshit video game coder and never even realized it was a game engine until I convinced him to try his hand at both XNA and C++ with SDL.

    The worst offense Game Maker ever pulled on me was teaching me that Windows Vista and my graphics card had no qualms about running at fucking QVGA. Whatever black magic it uses to take over the video card should be exorcised by a licensed technology priest.

    @blakeyrat said:

    So anyway, Hotline Miami is a new hot indie game which is known for having great music. A friend of mine was kind enough to gift me a copy so I attempted to run it... the first thing that happens when you run it off Steam is the C++ redist installer runs even though it's already installed (forcing me to do a pointless "repair" install just to get past it).

    Don't worry, I've seen AAA titles (specifically Borderlands 2) do that too.

    Games should just use whatever black magic Microsoft uses to compile things like Media Center the flashy new Solitare. Did you know they don't use .NET, C++, or even DirectX? I mean, how can they, if they ship with Windows and therefore have to work without "becoming a .NET delivery channel".

    Can't wait until the Windows 8 store is extant enough that there's no more redistributable crap.



  • @MiffTheFox said:

    Friend of mine thought he was a hotshit video game coder and never even realized it was a game engine

    Huh? What did he think it was? A Cuisinart?


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