Working hard to SELECT @@VERSION



  • I was going through my old "WTF" folder and found a screenshot I'm pretty sure I meant to post but never got around to it.

    How does it take 57 seconds to run this query!?



  •  hiccup.

    Shirley it doesn't always do this?



  • @dhromed said:

     hiccup.

    Pretty strange hiccup to take over 5700 times longer than I'd expect!

    @dhromed said:

    Shirley it doesn't always do this?

    Actually, WS08DEV runs on VMware Server. IMSMR the host had 12GB RAM back then for two 4GB and one 1GB guests: not enough. Host has since been upgraded to 24GB RAM (one 4GB guest upped to 8GB) and I just tried it and it only took 1 second.



  • If you'll notice, there is quite a bit more than the SQL Server version - it appears to be querying your OS version as well. Granted, I don't think even that should take 57 seconds, but it could reasonably be expected not to be instantaneous!



  • It saw your hat and was laughing so hard it took 59 seconds to calm down enough to get around to responding to your request.



  • @Zemm said:

    @dhromed said:
     hiccup.

    Pretty strange hiccup to take over 5700 times longer than I'd expect!

    @dhromed said:

    Shirley it doesn't always do this?

    Actually, WS08DEV runs on VMware Server. IMSMR the host had 12GB RAM back then for two 4GB and one 1GB guests: not enough. Host has since been upgraded to 24GB RAM (one 4GB guest upped to 8GB) and I just tried it and it only took 1 second.

     

    ... It's a yes/no question...

    - HEY JOE, WHAT TIME IS IT?

    - ACTUALLY, JAKE, IT IS IN FACT AMAZING HOW CLOCKS WORK. HERE, THERE'S ONE ON THE CHURCH, AND ON MY PHONE, AND ON MY WRIST.

     

    I'm going to assume that you mean "Yes, dhromed, it always does this. I have no explanation for it."

    I think the hat consumed your brain.



  • Just tested against several different instances, and each time less than 1 second (shows up as 00:00:00)...



  • @C-Octothorpe said:

    Just tested against several different instances, and each time less than 1 second (shows up as 00:00:00)...

    Same here. 00:00:00



  • Network hiccup.



  • @dhromed said:

    - HEY JOE, WHAT TIME IS IT?

    - ACTUALLY, JAKE, IT IS IN FACT AMAZING HOW CLOCKS WORK. HERE, THERE'S ONE ON THE CHURCH, AND ON MY PHONE, AND ON MY WRIST.

    This amuses me, because my supervisor's name is Jake and our CEO's name is Joe. True story.



    1. Execute WAITFOR DELAY '00:01:00'; SELECT @@VERSION
    2. Delete WAITFOR command
    3. Screenshot


    4. @db2 said:

      1. Execute WAITFOR DELAY '00:01:00'; SELECT @@VERSION
      2. Delete WAITFOR command
      3. Screenshot

        Surely Zemm isn't that starved for atten--

        Surely Zemm doesn't know how to edit the contents of a text box.



      4. @db2 said:

        1. Execute WAITFOR DELAY '00:01:00'; SELECT @@VERSION
        2. Delete WAITFOR command
        3. Screenshot
          That would have made a delay of 00:01:00 execute in 00:00:57. Would still be a WTF in my eyes ;-)


        4. @morbiuswilters said:

          Surely Zemm isn't that starved for atten--.

          Look how slow my SQL server is! I can post to TDWTF every time I make a simple query, and compose novels if I try a JOIN!

          @morbiuswilters said:

          Surely Zemm doesn't know how to edit the contents of a text box.

          Not at all. What's a text box?


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