This is how it's done here



  • Our business users usually give us new "requirements" by waving their hands and saying: we want to do x. Of course, they never take the time to go into what is involved in doing x, so we just investigate and implement it as best we can, making it as generic as possible, coding as defensively as possible, and making it as configurable as possible.

    How can we get away with doing something so stupid risky? Because they won't provide us data until two months after the feature is installed in production.

    Stupid? Of course! I routinely point out that this is like asking an architect to design and build you a house, and telling them that you'll specify if it's to be a ranch or colonial two months after you move in. It falls on deaf ears.

    So for each release, my boss sends out a memo advising the business that since they haven't provided either requirements or data, that our testing of the new feature will be limited to regression testing the old features, and that actual testing of the feature will need to wait until we get the data and final any requirements.

    When I inquired of our senior software development manager how this can be tolerated, I got back: This is how it's done here.

     



  • @snoofle said:

    Our business users usually give us new "requirements" by waving their hands and saying: we want to do x. Of course, they never take the time to go into what is involved in doing x....
     

    I understand "this is how it's done here", I just don't understand "this is how we've always done it and we'll never change" or "nobody really understands how much money we waste by doing it this way".



  • @Cassidy said:

    @snoofle said:

    Our business users usually give us new "requirements" by waving their hands and saying: we want to do x. Of course, they never take the time to go into what is involved in doing x....
     

    I understand "this is how it's done here", I just don't understand "this is how we've always done it and we'll never change" or "nobody really understands how much money we waste by doing it this way".

    I think you posted this one before (at least, someone did). It's not very good, but at least it's not as nut-stabbingly-awful as xkcd.



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    I think you posted this one before (at least, someone did). It's not very good, but at least it's not as nut-stabbingly-awful as xkcd.

    I used to really love xkcd, and now it's sort of lost its glimmer to me. I don't know what voodoo you worked, but it sure helped!



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    I think you posted this one before (at least, someone did). It's not very good, but at least it's not as nut-stabbingly-awful as xkcd.
    Don't worry the closest xkcd I could find deals with password requirements so I don't think you have to worry too much about one appearing in this thread.

    Assuming it does not get derailed... (which is a bad assumption around here)



  • @toon said:

    I used to really love xkcd, and now it's sort of lost its glimmer to me. I don't know what voodoo you worked, but it sure helped!

    I recall another story about a miracle man who healed the sick..



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    @toon said:
    I used to really love xkcd, and now it's sort of lost its glimmer to me. I don't know what voodoo you worked, but it sure helped!

    I recall another story about a miracle man who healed the sick..

    Is that Arnold? I thought from the clip he was going back to protect Jesus, not be him



  • @serguey123 said:

    Is that Arnold? I thought from the clip he was going back to protect Jesus, not be him

    What clip?



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    @serguey123 said:
    Is that Arnold? I thought from the clip he was going back to protect Jesus, not be him

    What clip?

    Terminator (jesus parody) – 04:52
    — Nick P



  • @serguey123 said:

    @morbiuswilters said:
    @serguey123 said:
    Is that Arnold? I thought from the clip he was going back to protect Jesus, not be him

    What clip?

    Terminator (jesus parody) – 04:52
    — Nick P

    Oh, MadTV.. I was hoping there really was a Terminator 5 coming out where Arnold has to go back in time and save Jesus so that John Connor can be born.



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    I think you posted this one before (at least, someone did).

    I wasn't sure if I had, or if I discovered ONEFTE via someone linking that here. It's definitely one that's familiar.

    @morbiuswilters said:

    It's not very good, but at least it's not as nut-stabbingly-awful as xkcd.
     

    Your cluster did indeed feature as a consideration in cartoon requirements. Glad to have fulfilled.



  • @serguey123 said:

    @morbiuswilters said:

    Is that Arnold? I thought from the clip he was going back to protect Jesus, not be him

    Yeah, like Arnold would play a Jewish character.



  •  

    I suppose there are bad coders, there are really bad coders, there are
    fucking retards, and there's coders writing lines like this:
    $resultscode = $resultscode - 0;

    There are (0) stupid clients, there are (1) average clients, there are (2) brilliant clients, and there is (99) any client with lots of money.

     



  • Is it considered bad taste to link clientsfromhell.net here again?



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    I recall another story about a miracle man who healed the sick..

    O, is that what really happened? See, I was told he died at the cross, but of course, being our Lord and all, he could easily have broken free, and I believe it now that I see it depicted so truthfully. And he doesn't even blink, though those nails through his hands must hurt like, er, hell. You must tell this to the people, and especially today, as this day represents all that's wrong with this story. Go! Go!! Tell the Christians that they're wrong!!!



  • @Cassidy said:

    Is it considered bad taste to link clientsfromhell.net here again?

    Oh My Fairy Godmother... I though some of my clients were bad, but... :(



  • @Cassidy said:

    Is it considered bad taste to link clientsfromhell.net here again?
    As long as you can somehow relate it to a wooden table or web 0.1 you should be ok.  In the case of web 0.1:
    Client: “Excellent work, we love what you’ve done with the site! Actually, would it be too much trouble to send me the original?”

    Me: “The original?”

    Client: “You know, the site on paper, before you scanned it in.”

    But I bet these things would get old very quickly.



  • @Anketam said:

    @Cassidy said:

    Is it considered bad taste to link clientsfromhell.net here again?
    As long as you can somehow relate it to a wooden table or web 0.1 you should be ok.  In the case of web 0.1:
    Client: “Excellent work, we love what you’ve done with the site! Actually, would it be too much trouble to send me the original?”

    Me: “The original?”

    Client: “You know, the site on paper, before you scanned it in.”

    But I bet these things would get old very quickly.

    I love CFH but I have a suspicion some of them are too dumb to be true.

    Also, I just noticed CFH pushed out broken Google+ integration. You can "like" the articles but the counter is the same for every article.



  • @TGV said:

    being our Lord and all, he could easily have broken free

     You're right, he could have broken free. But he knew his death was coming and chose to die for it was his purpose to die in order to obtain victory over death and sin.



  • @pitchingchris said:

    @TGV said:

    being our Lord and all, he could easily have broken free

     You're right, he could have broken free. But he knew his death was coming and chose to die for it was his purpose to die in order to obtain victory over death and sin.

    Yeah, but that's just Christian indoctrination, right? You clearly see on the picture that he broke free. Fortunately someone was there at the time to make this action picture.



  • @TGV said:

    @pitchingchris said:

    @TGV said:

    being our Lord and all, he could easily have broken free

     You're right, he could have broken free. But he knew his death was coming and chose to die for it was his purpose to die in order to obtain victory over death and sin.

    Yeah, but that's just Christian indoctrination, right? You clearly see on the picture that he broke free. Fortunately someone was there at the time to make this action picture.

    That's actually from the Mirror Universe. Mirror Jesus broke free, enslaved humanity and had them spend all day building towers to honor him. Mirror Jesus was a dick, basically.



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    @TGV said:

    @pitchingchris said:

    @TGV said:

    being our Lord and all, he could easily have broken free

     You're right, he could have broken free. But he knew his death was coming and chose to die for it was his purpose to die in order to obtain victory over death and sin.

    Yeah, but that's just Christian indoctrination, right? You clearly see on the picture that he broke free. Fortunately someone was there at the time to make this action picture.

    That's actually from the Mirror Universe. Mirror Jesus broke free, enslaved humanity and had them spend all day building towers to honor him. Mirror Jesus was a dick, basically.

    On the plus side no Holocaust and Hitler looks like this



  • @serguey123 said:

    On the plus side no Holocaust and Hitler looks like this

     

    That picture is SO INSENSITIVE.

     



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    Also, I just noticed CFH pushed out broken Google+ integration. You can "like" the articles but the counter is the same for every article.
     

    Not broken for me at all, showing different counts for everything, just as for Twitter and Facebook.



  • @ASheridan said:

    @morbiuswilters said:

    Also, I just noticed CFH pushed out broken Google+ integration. You can "like" the articles but the counter is the same for every article.
     

    Not broken for me at all, showing different counts for everything, just as for Twitter and Facebook.

     

    Morbs must be running some adblock software that interferes with the G+ counts.

     



  • @ASheridan said:

    @morbiuswilters said:

    Also, I just noticed CFH pushed out broken Google+ integration. You can "like" the articles but the counter is the same for every article.
     

    Not broken for me at all, showing different counts for everything, just as for Twitter and Facebook.

    Looks like they fixed it.



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    @ASheridan said:

    @morbiuswilters said:

    Also, I just noticed CFH pushed out broken Google+ integration. You can "like" the articles but the counter is the same for every article.
     

    Not broken for me at all, showing different counts for everything, just as for Twitter and Facebook.

    Looks like they fixed it.
    I saw it yesterday, and it was indeed broken as you described.

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