Too many cooks...



  • Earlier today:

    • 1.30pm: Call from a user, toner is running out of the department printer. There is about 5% left in it according to the web-based UI, so I say I'll pop one over in the next hour or so when I go over there for something else as it's still working
    • 1.40pm: Call from another user, printer has run out of toner. I get a fresh box out and am just about to go on a walk across the business park, to the other building where the department in question is located.
      (Spot the difference between "running" and "ran"? our users often can't, but that's another story)
    • 1.41pm: Call from my boss, a company director, just as I'm about to trek across the car park. "Is it true we've run out of toner?!" What? Like, the whole company? "Yes."

    Apparently, two phone calls were overheard by another company director standing in the vicinity of the callers, who then immediately called my boss, who then called me. Chinese whispers suck.

    Even more amusingly annoyingly, no-one was actually waiting (in the queue or otherwise) to print. Someone noticed the warning on it as they walked past it from the kitchen.


  • Quick! Hurry! We have an emergency here! We've run out of resources and I may need to use some sometime, eventually, over the next day or two or week or month or never; but we need to make sure that the resources are made available immediately just because we are out! (and by run out of resources, I mean I used the last page of my notepad and I forgot where we keep the extras, because this is the notepad that I've been using since I got here 4 years ago and have never had cause to get a new one yet)



  • Usually, the emergencies in this place concerning running out of things involve toilet paper...



    ...In the men's toilet...



    ...When trying to find something to wipe your rear end with.



    Strangely, directors don't get involved with that sort of resource unavailability.



  • Either I need to get my eyes checked or my brain checked (or, indeed, just out of the gutter) because when I saw the OP's subject/title ... I did a triple-take.

     



  • @zelmak said:

    Either I need to get my eyes checked or my brain checked (or, indeed, just out of the gutter) because when I saw the OP's subject/title ... I did a triple-take.

     

    Because you thought the thread was about too many - I say - too many roosters?

     



  • @erikal said:

    @zelmak said:
    Either I need to get my eyes checked or my brain checked (or, indeed, just out of the gutter) because when I saw the OP's subject/title ... I did a triple-take.
     

    Because you thought the thread was about too many - I say - too many roosters?

     

    Now BOY, what, ah say what would give you a silly ah-dea like that?

     



  • @Mason Wheeler said:

    @erikal said:
    @zelmak said:
    Either I need to get my eyes checked or my brain checked (or, indeed, just out of the gutter) because when I saw the OP's subject/title ... I did a triple-take.
     Because you thought the thread was about too many - I say - too many roosters?
     Now BOY, what, ah say what would give you a silly ah-dea like that?
    And I had to triple-take at it to figure out how your depraved mind could twist it into something perverted.



  • @Anketam said:

    @Mason Wheeler said:

    @erikal said:
    @zelmak said:
    Either I need to get my eyes checked or my brain checked (or, indeed, just out of the gutter) because when I saw the OP's subject/title ... I did a triple-take.
     Because you thought the thread was about too many - I say - too many roosters?
     Now BOY, what, ah say what would give you a silly ah-dea like that?
    And I had to triple-take at it to figure out how your depraved mind could twist it into something perverted.

    My wife is having an MRI today. She had to fill out some paperwork asking if she had a neurological or vagal simulator in place. Imagine the double take when my brain threw an "in" in the middle of "vagal."


    And no, she has no artificially implanted stimulator of any kind . . .



  • @nonpartisan said:

    My wife is having an MRI today. She had to fill out some paperwork asking if she had a neurological or vagal simulator in place. Imagine the double take when my brain threw an "in" in the middle of "vagal."

    And no, she has no artificially implanted stimulator of any kind . . .

    But, what about the simulator they asked about?  That sounds like a question for a dude.



  • @nonpartisan said:

    Imagine the double take when my brain threw an "in" in the middle of "vagal."
     

    "va[b]in[/b]gal"? I don't get it. They're asking if she's self absorbed? I guess that's a neurological disorder, so that could show up on an MRI.

     



  • @Jaime said:

    @nonpartisan said:

    My wife is having an MRI today. She had to fill out some paperwork asking if she had a neurological or vagal simulator in place. Imagine the double take when my brain threw an "in" in the middle of "vagal."

    And no, she has no artificially implanted stimulator of any kind . . .

    But, what about the simulator they asked about?  That sounds like a question for a dude.

    Shit. Missed the "t" in stimulator.


    A neurological stimulator is typically used for pain control. A vagal stimulator is used for seizure control.



  • @zelmak said:

    Either I need to get my eyes checked or my brain checked (or, indeed, just out of the gutter) because when I saw the OP's subject/title ... I did a triple-take.

     

    But you can never have too many cocks!



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    But you can never have too many cocks!

    Judging by your avatar...

    <george-takei>Oh Myyyyy...<george-takei>



  • @nonpartisan said:

    @Jaime said:

    @nonpartisan said:

    My wife is having an MRI today. She had to fill out some paperwork asking if she had a neurological or vagal simulator in place. Imagine the double take when my brain threw an "in" in the middle of "vagal."

    And no, she has no artificially implanted stimulator of any kind . . .

    But, what about the simulator they asked about?  That sounds like a question for a dude.

    Shit. Missed the "t" in stimulator.

    A neurological stimulator is typically used for pain control. A vagal stimulator is used for seizure control.

     

    You don't think that I actually misunderstood you, do you?  Your typo of "simulator" was too funny to not take seriously and run with it.  BTW, you'll never guess what "vaginal simulator" would be used for.  Maybe I should try to drop one into the T-Remover in Leather Goddesses of Phobos?  Anybody got a hex editor and and old DOS virtual machine?


  • @MeesterTurner said:

    Usually, the emergencies in this place concerning running out of things involve toilet paper...



    ...In the men's toilet...



    ...When trying to find something to wipe your rear end with.



    Strangely, directors don't get involved with that sort of resource unavailability.

    Enumerate your options and choose your sacrifice.



  • @Jaime said:

    You don't think that I actually misunderstood you, do you?  Your typo of "simulator" was too funny to not take seriously and run with it.
     

    No, I knew you knew what I meant.  I just don't like having typorgaphical errors in my posts.

    I added the information about the stimulator types just in case anyone was curious.

    @Jaime said:

    BTW, you'll never guess what "vaginal simulator" would be used for.

    The thought is both intriguing and terrifying at the same time . . .



  • @Jaime said:

    BTW, you'll never guess what "vaginal simulator" would be used for.

    I heard about this guy who had one of those before, he accidentally the whole thing!



  • @nonpartisan said:

    And no, she has no artificially implanted stimulator of any kind . . .

    . . . yet.



  • @barrabus said:

    @Jaime said:
    BTW, you'll never guess what "vaginal simulator" would be used for.

    I heard about this guy who had one of those before, he accidentally the whole thing!

    I think you a verb there!



  • @TheRider said:

    @barrabus said:
    @Jaime said:
    BTW, you'll never guess what "vaginal simulator" would be used for.

    I heard about this guy who had one of those before, he accidentally the whole thing!

    I think you a verb there!
    No, I think he everything fine.


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