The UK Royal "Maim" service



  • The wife ordered a day to page hardback diary from t'internet - she's been looking for a decent one for a while

    Just got back in the house and the postman has been. He's folded the diary into a neat U shape in order to fit it through the letterbox.

    Thanks postman

    Not really code related, but a real WTF.

    Lovely.



  •  Is that a wet, sticky stain near the mail label? If so, I think I know what ripped it open.

     



  • I've gotten DVDs stuffed into my mailbox. The problem is that the rear opening, where the carrier inserts mail, is slightly smaller than the front opening due to the door. And the cases barely fit inside the interior of the mailbox, diagonally, to begin with. The packaging ended up looking a lot like your picture. On the bright side, it also tore the shrink wrap around the DVD, which is so often a PITA to get off.



  • What style of hardback is it?  As depending on which one there are things you could try to, well not fix the damage done by postman, but reduce it to something reasonable.



  • @Charleh said:

    The wife ordered a day to page hardback diary from t'internet - she's been looking for a decent one for a while

    Just got back in the house and the postman has been. He's folded the diary into a neat U shape in order to fit it through the letterbox.

    I imagine if you complain to the postie, he'll point out that it doesn't say "Do not bend, fold, spindle or mutilate" on the envelope.

     

    At which time you can point out that it also doesn't say that on him.  




  • What worries my more is the choice of pattern on the cover over what is presumably the kitchen wooden table. Smarties? Seriously? Is that simply to confuse your children, or did you make the mistake of allowing them to help choose a cover?



  • Leave it to the Scottish to mislabel candy. Those are clearly M&M's, these are smarties



  • @boomzilla said:

    The problem is that the rear opening, where the carrier inserts mail, is slightly smaller than the front opening due to the door.
     

    Before the cluster boxes had to be replaced in response to vandalism, mine was just the opposite.

    Which means that the box of checks  (yes, it was a few years ago) was easy enough for the carrier to insert from the back, but couldn't be removed from my side.  I solved this by cutting off the visible face of the carton, extracting its contents, then crushing the carton to yank it through the opening.

    I've wondered on more than one occasion if I shouldn't have left the empty carton in the box for the carrier to deal with the next day.



  • @Sarcarsm said:

    Leave it to the Scottish to mislabel candy. Those are clearly M&M's, these are smarties

    Your URL seems to have extraneous characters at the end of it. Perhaps you meant this one



  • @da Doctah said:

    @boomzilla said:
    The problem is that the rear opening, where the carrier inserts mail, is slightly smaller than the front opening due to the door.

    Before the cluster boxes had to be replaced in response to vandalism, mine was just the opposite.

    In fact, it was the same situation, but somehow I got lost in writing that sentence and said the opposite of what I meant.



  • @Sarcarsm said:

    Leave it to the Scottish to mislabel candy. Those are clearly M&M's, these are smarties

    Horrid...horrid US 'candy'.

    At least UK smarties have chocolate in and they actually have some cocoa content.

    The table covering was chosen by my better half. It's actually pretty bad for using a mouse on when I'm working from home - the print causes the pointer to shake like a dog shitting glass.

    @Cad Delworth said:

    What worries my more is the choice of pattern on the cover over what is presumably the kitchen wooden table. Smarties? Seriously? Is that simply to confuse your children, or did you make the mistake of allowing them to help choose a cover

    I left my 15 month old in the front room today for 5 minutes with a buttered English muffin and half a bottle of juice and like a minature McGuyver he picked the shackles confining him to his high chair and climbed out onto his tray. He stood up on the tray and started to dance to CBeebies. I hardly think a couple of printed smarties on a table top are going to confuse him! He went up to the family computer a few minutes later and when I caught him he'd managed to open the 'View Source' window in Firefox - I think he was just studying the html layout - probably tutting at the over-use of tables vs divs.



  • @DaveK said:

    if you complain to the postie, he'll point out that it doesn't say "Do not bend, fold, spindle or mutilate" on the envelope.

    At which time you can point out that it also doesn't say that on him.  

     

    bows in awe



  •  @Cad Delworth said:

    What worries my more is the choice of pattern on the cover over what is presumably the kitchen wooden table. Smarties? Seriously? Is that simply to confuse your children, or did you make the mistake of allowing them to help choose a cover?
    This.



  • @Sarcarsm said:

    Leave it to the Scottish to mislabel candy. Those are clearly M&M's, these are smarties

    Are those that kind of felt-y tips you glue to the bottom of the legs of chairs so they don't scratch the hardwood floor? I didn't know they made them in so many colours.

     



  • @Zecc said:

    @Sarcarsm said:

    Leave it to the Scottish to mislabel candy. Those are clearly M&M's, these are smarties

    Are those that kind of felt-y tips you glue to the bottom of the legs of chairs so they don't scratch the hardwood floor? I didn't know they made them in so many colours.

    Looks more like something you'd find on the business end of a pool cue. From the looks of them they probably taste the same.



  • @Charleh said:

    At least UK smarties have chocolate in and they actually have some cocoa content.

    I've not had any for some years... kinda got the urge now. Damn you.

    I recall as a kid some talk of only the orange ones being flavoured differently, the rest tasting of chocolate. Also jokes about purple smarties (until they became a featured colour).

    As for M&Ms... Van Halen don't like brown ones.



  • @PJH said:

    @Zecc said:

    @Sarcarsm said:

    Leave it to the Scottish to mislabel candy. Those are clearly M&M's, these are smarties

    Are those that kind of felt-y tips you glue to the bottom of the legs of chairs so they don't scratch the hardwood floor? I didn't know they made them in so many colours.

    Looks more like something you'd find on the business end of a pool cue. From the looks of them they probably taste the same.
     

    More like SweeTarts, now made by Wonka, but originated by the Sunline company of St Louis, Missouri.

     



  • @da Doctah said:

    @PJH said:

    @Zecc said:

    @Sarcarsm said:

    Leave it to the Scottish to mislabel candy. Those are clearly M&M's, these are smarties

    Are those that kind of felt-y tips you glue to the bottom of the legs of chairs so they don't scratch the hardwood floor? I didn't know they made them in so many colours.

    Looks more like something you'd find on the business end of a pool cue. From the looks of them they probably taste the same.
     

    More like SweeTarts, now made by Wonka, but originated by the Sunline company of St Louis, Missouri.

    Those are clearly Refreshers (Barratt's, not Swizzel)!




  • @Cassidy said:

    As for M&Ms... Van Halen don't like brown ones.


    The (plausible) explanation I've read is that the "bowl of M&Ms with the brown ones removed" clause in the contract was a canary to see whether the venue had read the contract carefully or not. If so, it's quite a clever idea.



  • @pjt33 said:

    @Cassidy said:

    As for M&Ms... Van Halen don't like brown ones.


    The (plausible) explanation I've read is that the "bowl of M&Ms with the brown ones removed" clause in the contract was a canary to see whether the venue had read the contract carefully or not. If so, it's quite a clever idea.

    It's true and it is clever.



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    @pjt33 said:
    The (plausible) explanation I've read is that the "bowl of M&Ms with the brown ones removed" clause in the contract was a canary to see whether the venue had read the contract carefully or not. If so, it's quite a clever idea.

    It's true and it is clever.

    I was wondering who'd pick up on that... AIUI, they decided to add it after a rigging accident nearly claimed the life of one of their crew.

    (when I worked "noize boyz" we had some right strange tech riders coming through, many of which felt like spoiled brats trying to out-primadonna each other. There was a specified threshold before the pissInTheirTeapot flag became true.)



  • @Cassidy said:

    @morbiuswilters said:

    @pjt33 said:
    The (plausible) explanation I've read is that the "bowl of M&Ms with the brown ones removed" clause in the contract was a canary to see whether the venue had read the contract carefully or not. If so, it's quite a clever idea.

    It's true and it is clever.

    I was wondering who'd pick up on that... AIUI, they decided to add it after a rigging accident nearly claimed the life of one of their crew.

     

    Yup. "Canary in a cole mine". No brown M&Ms (which were item ~127 of a 5 page rider). They didn't read it completely. Do an extra full tech check and make sure all the shit we specified-- like proper load bearings and fire-retardant materials-- are actually in place.

     



  • Yeah and it hits the blogosphere about every 3 months like clockwork, so we've all heard the damned story before.



  • @blakeyrat said:

    Yeah and it hits the blogosphere about every 3 months like clockwork, so we've all heard the damned story before.

    I hadn't.



  • @Sutherlands said:

    @blakeyrat said:

    Yeah and it hits the blogosphere about every 3 months like clockwork, so we've all heard the damned story before.

    I hadn't.
    On average, you have.



  • @fterfi secure said:

    @Sutherlands said:

    @blakeyrat said:

    Yeah and it hits the blogosphere about every 3 months like clockwork, so we've all heard the damned story before.

    I hadn't.
    On average, you have.
    Next trimester, I will have.

     



  • @da Doctah said:

    @boomzilla said:

    The problem is that the rear opening, where the carrier inserts mail, is slightly smaller than the front opening due to the door.
     

    Before the cluster boxes had to be replaced in response to vandalism, mine was just the opposite.

    Which means that the box of checks  (yes, it was a few years ago) was easy enough for the carrier to insert from the back, but couldn't be removed from my side.  I solved this by cutting off the visible face of the carton, extracting its contents, then crushing the carton to yank it through the opening.

    I've wondered on more than one occasion if I shouldn't have left the empty carton in the box for the carrier to deal with the next day.

     

    Great. You post this, and all of a sudden, I have a package stuck in the mailbox. It's a 7" case stuck in a < 7" opening. I've left notes saying "Hey, this big package that's been sitting here for days, maybe you want to move this to the package slot?" to no avail.

    I had to phone the helpdesk. I repeat, I had to phone the helpdesk of a GOVERNMENT ORGANIZATION.

    I now officially hate you. You caused this with your forum post. Thanks a lot. (THAT WAS SARCASM. I NOT THANK YOU!)

     


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