An Open Apology to DAVID Korn



  • My Apology to DAVID Korn, High School Graduate, creator of the Korn shell and all-around nice guy:

    Dear Mr. Korn,

    Reecntly I posted a thread on WorseThanFailure.com that might be interpreted, by literal-minded Wapner-watching "excellent driver" types, as critical of your conduct.

    I have been informed that this was unwarranted, and that I "owe you an apology." So, here it is:

    I'm sorry you were in the right place at the right time, and got to be an influential systems programmer.

    I'm sorry that, unlike you, I was not born into a world receptive to new systems programs, and therefore have to either
    1) toil away in obscurity writing .NET code or 2) seek fame in the world of Angry Birds-style "apps" running on glorified Game Boys.

    And I'm sorry that, whichever of these exquisitely distasteful options I choose, I will be mocked as a Luddite for even suggesting that my time might be better spent
    elsewhere. How dare I even HINT that writing programs for people who never bothered to learn the difference between single-click and double-click is an
    activity that's beneath me. I am sorry I ever suggested that.

    I'm sorry for all the adulation you've received over the years. There are thousands if not millions of better programmers than you out there,
    and I'm sorry that their talents are wasted on the crap world we live in now and the infantile perverts that control it.

    It must have been nice actually getting to write real programs, and actually having people give a damn about them... even though they don't
    have "glare effects" or pretend to be able to do two things at once. I'm sorry I never got to experience this... even though, at one time at least, it seemed to me to be
    what I was born to do.

    I'm happy that you found a way to go to graduate school in Computer Science before it turned into a hypercompetitive, careerist, highly leveraged
    lottery for huge swaths of the third world. I'm sorry you just got to do what you loved and were good at. And I'm thoroughly sorry that I - being born about a decade too late - did not get this opportunity,
    despite scoring a 1530 (Q+V) on the GRE.

    Finally, I'm sorry that, unlike you, I will never be granted titles of respect, never be given the opportunity to share my thoughts in print, or even be awarded a real pension or real health insurance.
    I'm sorry you got to live in a world shaped by Timothy Leary, and I get to live in a world shaped by Rick Perry.

    I'm sorry for myself and for all the other intelligent computer programmers born into a world to which we are anathema.

    Finally, I'm sorry you got to live in the world of UNIX, and I get to live in the world of eunuchs. I'd trade places in an instant.

    Love,

    Bridget99

     



  •  Apology accepted, though I don't know who you are talking about

    Signed,

    Not David Korn



  • @bridget99 said:

    I'm sorry you got to live in a world shaped by Timothy Leary, and I get to live in a world shaped by Rick Perry.

    Sweet, where do I have to move to get that deal, too?


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    Does this sound to anyone else like an eight-year-old being forced to apologize by parents?



  • @PedanticCurmudgeon said:

    Does this sound to anyone else like an eight-year-old being forced to apologize by parents?

    More like the sound of sarcasm whooshing past, a kilometer above your head.



  • @PedanticCurmudgeon said:

    Does this sound to anyone else like an eight-year-old being forced to apologize by parents?
     

    Yup.


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @The_Assimilator said:

    @PedanticCurmudgeon said:
    Does this sound to anyone else like an eight-year-old being forced to apologize by parents?

    More like the sound of sarcasm whooshing past, a kilometer above your head.

    Forced apologies from eight-year-olds are normally characterized by sarcasm, which was my point.



  • @PedanticCurmudgeon said:

    Does this sound to anyone else like my wife apologizing
    FTFY



  • @Sutherlands said:

    @PedanticCurmudgeon said:
    Does this sound to anyone else like my wife apologizing
    FTFY
    Your wife apologizes?



  •  This ... nothing more needs to be said.

     

    I hope the quote got included .. if not, I look like a fool .. or I could just blame the system. Your choice

     

    Edit: Well, it didn't ... but since no other comments actually commented on anything other than the OP being an 8 year old, bitching about not being amongst the people laying the foundation of our "great scince" ..



  • @bridget99 said:

    I'm sorry you got to live in a world shaped by Timothy Leary, and I get to live in a world shaped by Rick Perry.

    Because... some mass hypnosis aliens came along and removed all of Timothy Leary's influence on the modern world?

    @bridget99 said:

    Finally, I'm sorry you got to live in the world of UNIX, and I get to live in the world of eunuchs. I'd trade places in an instant.

    I wonder if you know the meaning of this quote:

    @Isaac Newton said:

    If I have seen further it is only by standing on the shoulders of giants.

    The reason people aren't working on "systems" anymore is that there's no fucking point. Linux, Sun, Windows, OS X, Android, iOS-- all are merely an implementation detail almost entirely divorced from the interesting work that needs to be done.

    Anyway, that aside, the reason you're not getting ahead is that you somehow think your GRE score matters in some way. No, the world doesn't owe you anything because you did well on a test.



  •  I for one enjoyed the OP although I'm not sure why you're bothering to flame some guy on the interwebs. Personally I can come up with at least half a dozen things I'd rather be doing with my time.

     

    ...by the way Call of Duty Modern Combat 3 owns.



  • @DOA said:

    ...by the way Call of Duty Modern Combat 3 owns.

    This holiday game season has been CRAZY. Battlefield 3 barely gets warmed up, before we're all forced to choose between MW3 and Skyrim. And that's only the AAA titles, look at AA titles and there's a half-dozen others I want to be playing right now... (I've barely touched Heroes of Might and Magic 6.)

    Well, we all need to fill the long gap in February anyway.



  • @blakeyrat said:

    the reason you're not getting ahead is that you somehow think your GRE score matters in some way. No, the world doesn't owe you anything because you did well on a test.
     

    I'll bet they were lying to me back in school about that whole "permanent record" business too.



  • @blakeyrat said:

    Well, we all need to fill the long gap in February between adolescence and adulthood anyway.


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

     MW3, if it holds true to its older siblings, will be a one-sitting deal anyway. Skyrim, though. Skyrim is going to have to be a long-term project. I think I might quit drinking for a few weeks so I have the time...



  • 1) Ait the time the Korn shell (and many other items in the same time frame) were developed, no one had any clue as to what their impact would be.

    2) There are plenty of opportunities for truely innovative development today. Most people simply do not seek them out.

    3) No one know what development currently in progress will have a "world changing effect" (though it is known that most will not)

    NOTHING has changed [I have been writing software for nearly 40 years, with over 35 of them being professional - so I have some experience in this area], any developer, if they choose has the potential to "change the world".

    Of course, if David Korn (or many others) had been content to write Cobol (or Fortran) programs all day on existing systems, they might have the same POV as the OP. 



  • @boomzilla said:

    @blakeyrat said:

    Well, we all need to fill the long fap in February between adolescence and adulthood anyway.


     


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