Messing with the FNG



  • Had this little IM conversation with the new guy.  He's young and impressionable.  I'm an old fart.

    FNG (01:25:32 PM): Hey is there a VBscript function that detects whether a number is negative
    ME (01:26:12 PM): Uh, yeah.  n < 0
    FNG (01:27:47 PM): o... right >_>
    ME (01:28:06 PM): I can wrap that in a fucntion for you...
    FNG (01:28:42 PM): ok...
    ME (01:30:43 PM): This will work:
    Function isNegative(n)
       isNegative = False
       If n < 0 Then
          isNegative = True
       End If
    End Function

    FNG (01:32:27 PM): but what if it's null?
    ME (01:32:49 PM): Oh yeah.  Give me a minute...
    ME (01:35:07 PM): try this:
    Function isNegative(n)
        If Not isNull(n) Then    
            If IsNumeric(n) Then
                If n < 0 Then
                    isNegative = True
                Else
                    isNegative = False
                End If
            Else
                isNegative = NAN
            End If
        Else
                isNegative = FILE_NOT_FOUND
        End If
    End Function

    FNG (01:37:18 PM): Thanks!

     



  • ASP classic? in 2010?



  • @b-redeker said:

    ASP classic? in 2010?

    VBScript implies "system administration script" to me.



  • @blakeyrat said:

    @b-redeker said:

    ASP classic? in 2010?

    VBScript implies "system administration script" to me.

    Ah yes. One can only hope.



  •  Yep.  We're not writing real software here.  Just administrative scripts.

     



  • @lizardfoot said:

     Yep.  We're not writing real software here.  Just administrative scripts.

     

    In fucking VB.



  • @blakeyrat said:

    @b-redeker said:

    ASP classic? in 2010?

    VBScript implies "system administration script" to me.
    VBScript for administration in 2010?  What about PowerShell?



  • @dhromed said:

    @lizardfoot said:

     Yep.  We're not writing real software here.  Just administrative scripts.

     

    In fucking VB.

     

    Yep.  There are a lot of older Windows systems that don't have Powershell, Perl, Ruby or any other cool new scripting capabilities.  So we do what we can and unfortunately a lot of it is in VBScript.  If I had a choice, I'd throw Suse Enterprise on every machine and virtually stream all the old Windows apps.  But I'm just an old cube rat, trying to keep my job until death, retirement or the onset of insanity; whichever comes first.

     



  • @lizardfoot said:

    Yep.  There are a lot of older Windows systems that don't have Powershell, Perl, Ruby or any other cool new scripting capabilities.  So we do what we can and unfortunately a lot of it is in VBScript.  If I had a choice, I'd throw Suse Enterprise on every machine and virtually stream all the old Windows apps.  But I'm just an old cube rat, trying to keep my job until death, retirement or the onset of insanity; whichever comes first.

    ... still, you could be using JScript. Same advantages, better language.

    CS is sending fewer and fewer email updates, following threads is quickly becoming an amusing exercise in non-sequiturs.



  • Also, after messing with the new guy for an appropriate amount of time* did you at least set him straight?

     

    *) "appropriate amount of time" in my book is Δt =~ 0. But I have no sense of humor.



  • @blakeyrat said:

    CS is sending fewer and fewer email updates, following threads is quickly becoming an amusing exercise in non-sequiturs.
     

    Like half of a telephone conversation, and probably the same level of amusement.



  •  @lizardfoot said:

    Yep.  There are a lot of older Windows systems that don't have Powershell, Perl, Ruby or any other cool new scripting capabilities.  So we do what we can and unfortunately a lot of it is in VBScript.  If I had a choice, I'd throw Suse Enterprise on every machine and virtually stream all the old Windows apps. 

    I see.

    Keep on trucking, good man.

    Maybe look into JScript anyway.



  • @lizardfoot said:

    OP

    ... man, you're evil. :P

    ED: No need to quote the entire OP.  -btk



  • @b-redeker said:

    @blakeyrat said:

    @b-redeker said:

    ASP classic? in 2010?

    VBScript implies "system administration script" to me.

    Ah yes. One can only hope.

    I work with a commercial program that supports scripting with VBScript in order to deliver desired functionality - not for doing an odd admin task.  Said product is the creation of a company that brings good things to light.  (This product theoretically supports JScript, but you can't use it any practical manner - so its VBSCript for me).  To make matters worse the numnuts who wrote this product decided that all their scripts will have the extension ".VB".  Which in case you don't know is the MS blessed extension for VB.  They should have used ".VBS" as the correct extention.  Of course VBScript is not VB, and one day I loaded one of these scripts into VS2008 (or even VS2005) and it "helped" me by correcting the strange syntax it saw to be correct for VB.  (It didn't take me long to realize that the changed script didn't work.)  Given the mix up between VB and VBS extensions I also asked these same numnuts how they cope with professional tools like VS.  The answer was that they code in Notepad.  To finish off this is also the product that I use that is layered on top of VSS!



  • @OzPeter said:

    I work with a commercial program that supports scripting with VBScript in order to deliver desired functionality - not for doing an odd admin task.  Said product is the creation of a company that brings good things to light.  (This product theoretically supports JScript, but you can't use it any practical manner - so its VBSCript for me).  To make matters worse the numnuts who wrote this product decided that all their scripts will have the extension ".VB".  Which in case you don't know is the MS blessed extension for VB.  They should have used ".VBS" as the correct extention.  Of course VBScript is not VB, and one day I loaded one of these scripts into VS2008 (or even VS2005) and it "helped" me by correcting the strange syntax it saw to be correct for VB.  (It didn't take me long to realize that the changed script didn't work.)  Given the mix up between VB and VBS extensions I also asked these same numnuts how they cope with professional tools like VS.  The answer was that they code in Notepad.  To finish off this is also the product that I use that is layered on top of VSS!

    That's basically enough WTF for an article right there.



  •  FNG = Fucking new guy?

    Fresh new guy?

    Fapping new guy?



  • @belgariontheking said:

     FNG = Fucking new guy?

    Fresh new guy?

    Fapping new guy?

     

    Right the first time.

     





  • @emurphy said:

    @belgariontheking said:

     FNG = Fucking new guy?

    Fresh new guy?

    Fapping new guy?

     

    Right the first time.

     

    Why not just [url=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bastard_Operator_From_Hell]PFY, so you can be BOFH[/url] :-)



  • You fools!  BTK wasn't asking for a trivial Google result, he was setting someone up for a joke!  But no one took the alley-oop!

    :(



  •  What's a BTK?



  • @dhromed said:

     What's a BTK?

    Oh dear god my eyes!

    You don't want to know :(





  • @Thief^ said:

    @dhromed said:

     What's a BTK?

    Oh dear god my eyes!

    You don't want to know :(

     

    BTK?  The keeper of the Orb of Aldur, and one of the only remaining descendants of Riva Iron-Grip??



  • @Jonathan said:

     http://lmgtfy.com/?q=btk&l=1

    You fools! Dhromed wasn't asking for a trivial Google result, he was setting someone up for a joke! But no one took the alley-oop!

    :(



  • What's a Dhromed?



  • @Xyro said:

    What's a Dhromed?

     

    Dunno.

    Maybe it's case sensitive?



  • @dhromed said:

    @Xyro said:

    What's a Dhromed?

     

    Dunno.

    Maybe it's case sensitive?

    I remember a vague requirement saying that the first meaningful word of a sentence should be capitalized. So the only conclusion is that dhromed is devoid of meaning



  • @bjolling said:

    I remember a vague requirement saying that the first meaningful word of a sentence should be capitalized. So the only conclusion is that dhromed is devoid of meaning
    For which language?  In English, the first word is always capitalized no matter how meaningless, and only proper nouns after that.  So the only conclusion is that dhromed is not a proper noun.

    So in that case, it's a totally legitimate question to ask: what is a dhromed?



  • Maybe it's a verb?

    I dhrome, he dhromes, we have dhromed.





  • @b-redeker said:

    I dhrome, he dhromes, we have dhromed.
     

    You'll laugh if I tell you.

     

    Or cry.



  • @dhromed said:

    @b-redeker said:

    I dhrome, he dhromes, we have dhromed.
     

    You'll laugh if I tell you.

     

    Or cry.

    Go on.

    * gets popcorn and soda *



  • As a young boy, in my early internet years, I was on IRC.

    My nick was something we will not mention here. It's irrelevant, and sauced with teen hubris.

    Then came a moment of play where everyone in the channel changed his or her nick to a dragonified version. Something of a you-had-to-be-there joke. I don't remember it anymore.

    My nick was:

    Chromed_Dragon

    AWESUM!

    Then I said,

    – Fuck it.

    And I changed it to:

    Dhromed_Cragon

    And then I chopped off the latter part.

    Tadaa.



  • @dhromed said:

    Dhromed_Cragon

    And then I chopped off the latter part.

    What's a Cragon?





  • @b-redeker said:

    @dhromed said:

    Dhromed_Cragon

    And then I chopped off the latter part.

    What's a Cragon?

     

    not sure if serious...



  • Hey guys, I think found out the forum's crapping out when you add tags[reproduction needed].



  • @dhromed said:

    Hey guys, I think found out the forum's crapping out when you add tags[reproduction needed].

    Yah it did that to me earlier. I tried to add a half-dozen tags to my post in the other thread mentioning that the word "tag" implies you can add a half-dozen of them to a single object. As kind of a meta-joke. CS crapped out in the post editor, and I didn't attempt it back on the thread page.

    The email subscriptions are now almost entirely broken. I'm seeing maybe 1/10 posts get an email now.

    I think the forum is about to asplode.



  • @dhromed said:

    Hey guys, I think found out the forum's crapping out when you add tags[reproduction needed].

    Confirmed! If you add tags in the post editor, it'll post your message but return a (generic) error and not post the tags. If you try to add tags on the thread page, you get a slightly more specific error from the JS.



  • @dhromed said:

    Hey guys, I think found out the forum's crapping out when you add tags[reproduction needed].

    Been there, done that, thought it was normal for the second monday of the month.  What it does is outright lying, it tells me that there was an error but post my repply without the tags, so... you have been repro... sometime ago.



  • @Xyro said:

    @bjolling said:
    I remember a vague requirement saying that the first meaningful word of a sentence should be capitalized. So the only conclusion is that dhromed is devoid of meaning
    For which language?  In English, the first word is always capitalized no matter how meaningless, and only proper nouns after that.  So the only conclusion is that dhromed is not a proper noun.
    It's the case in Dutch and since dhromed is from Dutchland, this rule applies to him.



  • @bjolling said:

    @Xyro said:
    @bjolling said:
    I remember a vague requirement saying that the first meaningful word of a sentence should be capitalized. So the only conclusion is that dhromed is devoid of meaning
    For which language?  In English, the first word is always capitalized no matter how meaningless, and only proper nouns after that.  So the only conclusion is that dhromed is not a proper noun.
    It's the case in Dutch and since dhromed is from Dutchland, this rule applies to him.
    Interesting!  I did not know that.  So is both the first word and the first significant word capitalized, or just the first significant word?  Are there any rules for when a sentence has no meanginful words?  "Like this?"



  • @dhromed said:

    Hey guys, I think found out the forum's crapping out when you add tags<FONT size=2>[reproduction needed]</FONT>.

    For the record: private messages and mails also crap out, even without tags. (Not sure why you can even add tags to a message, but hey. CS.)



  • @b-redeker said:

    @dhromed said:

    Dhromed_Cragon

    And then I chopped off the latter part.

    What's a Cragon?

    It's a Bire-Freathing Dreature.


  • @danixdefcon5 said:

    @b-redeker said:

    What's a Cragon?

    It's a Bire-Freathing Dreature.

    As in good old Robbie Burns.

    To you, sir, this summons I've sent,
    Pray, whip till the pownie is freathing;
    But if you demand what I want,
    I honestly answer you-naething.



  • @Xyro said:

    @bjolling said:

    @Xyro said:
    @bjolling said:
    I remember a vague requirement saying that the first meaningful word of a sentence should be capitalized. So the only conclusion is that dhromed is devoid of meaning
    For which language?  In English, the first word is always capitalized no matter how meaningless, and only proper nouns after that.  So the only conclusion is that dhromed is not a proper noun.
    It's the case in Dutch and since dhromed is from Dutchland, this rule applies to him.
    Interesting!  I did not know that.  So is both the first word and the first significant word capitalized, or just the first significant word?  Are there any rules for when a sentence has no meanginful words?  "Like this?"

    That's not a sentence because it lacks about everything a sentence should have, like a noun and a verb :-)

    I looked it up and it turns out my definition is incorrect. It's not the first significant word that should be capitalized, it's more like the first word that has a meaning on it's own that should be capitalized, even if it means almost nothing. So it's probably not too different from English. I think I got things mixed up the rule on "how to capitalize a title". An example is:
    's Morgens eet ik ontbijt (In the morning I have breakfast).

    In Dutch the sentence starts with an ['s] (abbreviation of "des") which in se doesn't mean anything.... just like 'dhromed' :-p



  • @bjolling said:

    's Morgens eet ik ontbijt
     

    It should be noted that, even though you learn this stuff in preschool (group... 7? 8?), nobody remembers to write it that way or even cares.

    I was the only one in group 7 that knew how to spell "grootte".

    Hilarious when your tiny classmates tell you you've done it wrong.



  • @bjolling said:

    In Dutch the sentence starts with an ['s] (abbreviation of "des") which in se doesn't mean anything...

    So why do you type it? See this is why you can't compete with the world economy and have to hide behind the Germans!

    (Insert tag about nationalist trolling. Sorry tags still busted.)



  • @blakeyrat said:

    @bjolling said:
    In Dutch the sentence starts with an ['s] (abbreviation of "des") which in se doesn't mean anything...

    So why do you type it? See this is why you can't compete with the world economy and have to hide behind the Germans!

    (Insert tag about nationalist trolling. Sorry tags still busted.)

    It's a fixed expression from days long gone

    The only reason that Belgium can't compete with the world economy is because 6 million hard working Dutch speaking people have to support the 4 million unemployed French speaking minority

    (now that's what I call trolling)


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