Web Unteacher

Kharel

So, we have here this web "teacher", teaching such things as how to create a message box in Javascript: http://www.webteacher.com/javascript/ch01.html.

I... hardly even know where to start, so I'll just start from the top and work my way down.

1. The ad image. It makes me want to harm small fluffy animals repeatedly, after which I would like to stuff said small fluffy harmed animals down smiling guy's obnoxiously smiling face. Seriously, no one looks like that when programming.

2. UPPERCASE TAGS AND ATTRIBUTES WENT OUT OF STYLE WITH MICROSOFT FRONTPAGE.

3. You're wrapping the Javascript alert function with your own function. Really? As if the functionality of alert() might somehow suddenly change?

4. Your code formatting is fail.

5. YOUR mixing oF attriBute names CONFUSES Me.

6. Why are half your attributes quoted and half not?

It's a cornucopia of wtf! Feel free to find your own additions...

davedavenotdavemaybe

I like the anigif on this page: http://www.webteacher.com/javascript/ch01_4.html

RTapeLoadingError

The fact that the background repeats. It's especially noticable on this page when viewed at 1280x1024.

Also on this page we have black text on a dark purple background.

Also on this page we have the typo: Learn PHP Tutorila

frits

Hey! Where'd they get that picture of me from the last time one of my programs finally worked?

Scarlet_Manuka

Nobody even mentioned the good stuff...

[url=http://www.webteacher.com/javascript/ch03_1.html]How to use passwords[/url], because nobody would think to get your password using the Super Secret "View Source" technique.

[url=http://www.webteacher.com/javascript/ch04_1.html]Encryption, the Data Loss way[/url] - even if you don't pick characters that aren't in his string, it still eats any uppercase Zs. And that's even without getting into the potential usefulness of ROT-1 style encryption. And sure, the point of the example is using loops, but it would have been nice to see some indication of "This is not actually a good way to perform this task".

[url=http://www.webteacher.com/javascript/ch06_3.html]Choose a search engine![/url] - I hope your first choice is Yahoo!, Lycos or Excite.

[url=http://www.webteacher.com/javascript/ch07_1.html]A cornucopia of comedy.[/url] I'm particularly fond of the more secure password system, which is implemented via onClick="location=form.pass.value+'.htm'". I can see that will work well. Unless, you know, you didn't want to have the same password for everybody. Or you didn't want to have either easily-attacked passwords or stupid page names. Or you wanted to have a password system that prevented people from just going directly to the protected page. But hey, he's right - the password doesn't appear in the source code this way, so I guess it is more secure. Just like leaving your front door ajar is more secure than leaving it fully open.

PeriSoft

I like how "$25" is listed as a feature.

piskvorr

From the "About" page:

cw=new Date();document.write('© '+cw.getFullYear())

Old webpage is old.

dhromed

@RTapeLoadingError said:

Learn PHP Tutorila

PHP: it's what's for dinner!

cconroy

@Kharel said:

smiling guy's obnoxiously smiling face. Seriously, no one looks like that when programming.

He's not programming, he's driving a pretend car. A pretty nice one, from the look of it.

dhromed

@cconroy said:

He's not programming, he's driving a pretend car. A pretty nice one, from the look of it.

Perhaps he is about to dig in to a tasty giant pretend tutortilla with pretend cutlery.

scgtrp

<HTML><HEAD>
<TITLE>Chapter 1- The Message Box</TITLE>


<HTML><HEAD>
<TITLE>Java script message box script tutorial</TITLE>

What is this I don't even...

I also love the emulation of :hover with JS.

Lingerance

@scgtrp said:

I also love the emulation of :hover with JS.

As others have stated this is old. So it would stand to reason CSS wasn't as prominant back then.

cconroy

@dhromed said:

Perhaps he is about to dig in to a tasty giant pretend tutortilla with pretend cutlery.

Mmm, imagilicious!

Cad_Delworth

@Kharel said:

The ad image. It makes me want to harm small fluffy animals repeatedly, after which I would like to stuff said small fluffy harmed animals down smiling guy's obnoxiously smiling face. Seriously, no one looks like that when programming.

I bet it's a Stock Photo from somewhere and nothing to do with the site's owner. Probably its original name is something like 'Middle-aged man smiling at laptop.' Bear in mind this is a software company, not just 'a guy.'

But I totally agree: horrifically unsuitable for an image of a programmer. Mind you, this page http://www.webteacher.com/webdata/index.html has an even more revolting image on it. Seriously!

@Kharel said:

2. UPPERCASE TAGS AND ATTRIBUTES WENT OUT OF STYLE WITH MICROSOFT FRONTPAGE.

The firm was established in 1997, so probably this is 'old stuff' that hasn't been updated for n years.

toth

I don't see the problem. It says right at the top:

"JavaScript a tutorial 'for the TOTAL non-programmer'."

Wouldn't you call that non-programming?

toth

It also advises you to use <script language="javascript"></script>, when the language attribute has been deprecated for some time, but I guess that's a relatively minor WTF. Still, advising newcomers to use deprecated syntax bugs me.

dcardani

@RTapeLoadingError said:

The fact that the background repeats. It's especially noticable on this page when viewed at 1280x1024.
Also on this page we have black text on a dark purple background.
Also on this page we have the typo: Learn PHP Tutorila

Ha! I love the "transparent gif" with the poorly anti-aliased white edges against the dark purple background. CLASSY!

dtfinch

Reminds me of this snippet I wrote several years ago to pop up an input prompt from javascript running under wscript.exe (which lacks "prompt()").

function vbesc(s) {
    return (""+(s||"")).split('"').join('""').split("\n").join("\"+vbcrlf+\"");
}
function prompt(a,b) {
    var c=WScript.CreateObject("MSScriptControl.ScriptControl");
    c.Language="VBScript";
    return c.Eval("inputbox(\""+vbesc(a)+"\",\""+vbesc(b)+"\")");
}

The_Quiet_One

@Kharel said:

1. The ad image. It makes me want to harm small fluffy animals repeatedly, after which I would like to stuff said small fluffy harmed animals down smiling guy's obnoxiously smiling face. Seriously, no one looks like that when programming.

See, the ad image makes me laugh because I'm picturing him doing a simple script like this and feeling this sense of accomplishment as if he just got a 200% yield on his stocks.

@Kharel said:

3. You're wrapping the Javascript alert function with your own function. Really? As if the functionality of alert() might somehow suddenly change?

In the context of this simple code, it makes no sense. I've often done stuff like this, however, because I know in the near-future I will be using HTML-based alerts that fit better with the page and don't make any annoying alert sounds the OS might be configured to play, and the alert is just a temporary popup until I start doing the look and feel.

I'll have to repeat everyone else's comments, though, and say this is a relic from the past. That being said, I think even htmlgoodies did a better job at javascript tutorials than this site did when it was relevant, and the inconsistent whitespace and attribute assignment with quotes/without quotes is still a WTF.

Sidenote: The reason onClick is not in all-caps like the others is because I am 99% certain either IE or Netscape only recognized onClick, and none of the other permutations of case.

blakeyrat

@davedavenotdavemaybedave said:

I like the anigif on this page: http://www.webteacher.com/javascript/ch01_4.html

That thing? Best ever.

Nyquist

@RHuckster said:

@Kharel said:
3. You're wrapping the Javascript alert function with your own function. Really? As if the functionality of alert() might somehow suddenly change?
In the context of this simple code, it makes no sense.

I get why they've done it - just to demonstrate the syntax of a function. The jQuery docs have a similar example in the section on 'Launching code on Document Ready' but at least it's clear that the alert is for testing purposes only.

All a bit complicated for the "Total non programmer" though.

I like how the IA (if you can call it that) of the tutorial is structured around Back buttons. That really fucks with my head.

As for the guy at the top of the page, its simple. He jizzed in his pants.

Lingerance

@Nyquist said:

I like how the IA (if you can call it that) of the tutorial is structured around Back buttons. That really fucks with my head.

What do you mean by IA?

Nyquist

@Lingerance said:

@Nyquist said:
I like how the IA (if you can call it that) of the tutorial is structured around Back buttons. That really fucks with my head.
What do you mean by IA?

IA = Information Architecture.

@Lingerance said:

What do you mean by IA?

Interface, Asshole!