Stop the Insanity... PLEASE!!!
So I am part of a team of 5 developers and a project lead for a specific project at work. We are attempting to adopt SCRUM methodologies. I am the only member of the team who has worked in anything resembling a SCRUM environment. Last week, we concluded a long series of design meetings and had come up with a general overall high-level design. The plan going forward was to meet again and break down the project into n sprints. Great! Fantastic! Even though I was taking the next two days off and would not be involved in this planning, I trusted these people enough to make a good plan.
So when I return to work, I find out that the first "sprint" will be for everyone to take the various pieces as designed and do time estimates... for how long it will take them to come up with a task list... for a more detailed design.
Let me reiterate... I am not doing a more detailed design... I am not MAKING time estimates for the design of my assigned piece... I am not even MAKING a task list for the design... I am estimating how long it will take me to make a task list for doing a more detailed design.
Maybe I am the problem here, but does this sound a bit ridiculous to any one else?
Just write down 12 on a piece of paper and call it a day.
The problem here is that you care. This is a major windfall. You get weeks to slack off. Sure, the company will eventually go under and you will end up out on the street, starving. Until they throw you in prison for not being able to pay the fine for not having legally-mandated health insurance. Then you will have lukewarm meals, cold showers, copious anal rape and all the time you need to finally come up with an accurate estimate for how long it will take you to make a task list for that more detailed design.
Ridiculous! You don't even have a plan for HOW to make those time estimates! Your company should establish a leading-edge synergized proactive process that addresses your core competency to enable a scenario-based workshop on time estimates, resulting in a best-practices workflow for creating a task-driven fast-track plan for the time estimation for creating the task list for creating a more detailed design for whatever you create in a collaborative manner that incorporates cultural sensitivity as well as corporate governance.
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WHAT THE FUCK, ammoQ.
jpail should read that text in the next meeting, because everyone's going to lap it up.
Not to mention that our do-ma-flatchies need to be configured for flibberdigibit mode and the thingamajigs will need their whatchamacallits recalibrated.
RidiculousI agree. how can they expect you to
estimate how much time it'll come up with to make a set of bullet points so you can execute them in making your plando all that shit without training? You need a three week training course in estimates before you can do anything. Maybe after that and a few more seminars, they can let you turn on your computer, but that may be too hasty. One thing at a time, here.