"Lord of the Web" 2.0



  • We've probably all got a mental picture of the typical Microsoft MVP: the khaki pants; the dev-conference travel coffee mug and laptop case; the obsession with "sick new desktop gadgets" and "CTPs"; the 2-year-old white Toyota Highlander; etc.

    Somehow this guy ( http://www.flounder.com/ ) just doesn't seem to fit. But apparently he made it through their, um, rigorous selection process.

    The impression I get is almost as if that "Lord of the Web" guy were to get a PhD from Carnegie-Mellon. I guess Best Buy would really have to improve their benefits package for that to ever happen.

    Sadly, he is probably my favorite Microsoft MVP now. There's something endearingly stubborn about just not giving a damn about design and not wanting to screw around with people that do... since they probably wouldn't get along anyway.

     In fairness, this particular individual doesn't really seem to focus on the "Web" per se, he really is more of a nuts-and-bolts C++ expert.



  • His website has a counter. I know what page I'll be auto-reloading for the next few weeks.



  • I give this trolling attempt 3 out of 5 stars.  The mockery of MVPs is less heavy-handed than your unhinged IE6 rant, and the mental image you conjured made me chuckle a bit.

     

    The real problem is that I've already come to associate your username with highly contrived attempts at flamebait, so it's kind of a wash.  I also think you could have taken the MVP bashing a bit further and garnered more laughs, but I'm guessing you're still a little gun-shy after your last effort ended so badly.



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    I give this trolling attempt 3 out of 5 stars.  The mockery of MVPs is less heavy-handed than your unhinged IE6 rant, and the mental image you conjured made me chuckle a bit.

     

    The real problem is that I've already come to associate your username with highly contrived attempts at flamebait, so it's kind of a wash.  I also think you could have taken the MVP bashing a bit further and garnered more laughs, but I'm guessing you're still a little gun-shy after your last effort ended so badly.

    It's okay, I'm sure he (or she (or it)) will eventually learn.



  • Well, if you had just 1% of his experience and expertise, you might have some hope for my respect. This guy could single-handedly write a compiler. He's a Mr T of programming world (and I'm just 1% kidding).

    You might also want to look up his book(s) on Amazon, on writing Windows device drivers.

    Of course, you don't know that Dr. Newcomer currently has to use an electric "scooter" to get aroung. Nevertheless, he's flying all over the world to give his lessons.

    And yes, he has PhD from CMU.

     



  • @alegr said:

    Well, if you had just 1% of his experience and expertise, you might have some hope for my respect.

     

    I said he was my favorite Microsoft MVP! One must admit, though, that he doesn't really fit the typical MVP mold.

    @alegr said:

    This guy could single-handedly write a compiler.

    I don't doubt it. That's probably not as big a deal as you might imagine. In my experience, compiler development is similar to skeet shooting... it's both easier and more enjoyable than it looks from afar.

    @alegr said:

    Of course, you don't know that Dr. Newcomer currently has to use an electric "scooter" to get aroung.



    That's irrelevant... I have every expectation of having to warm myself by holding my colostomy bag over a garbage fire one day. It doesn't make me Mother Teresa, or for that matter Don Knuth.




  • @beau29 said:

    @alegr said:

    Well, if you had just 1% of his experience and expertise, you might have some hope for my respect.

     

    I said he was my favorite Microsoft MVP! One must admit, though, that he doesn't really fit the typical MVP mold.

    @alegr said:

    This guy could single-handedly write a compiler.

    I don't doubt it. That's probably not as big a deal as you might imagine. In my experience, compiler development is similar to skeet shooting... it's both easier and more enjoyable than it looks from afar.

    @alegr said:

    Of course, you don't know that Dr. Newcomer currently has to use an electric "scooter" to get aroung.



    That's irrelevant... I have every expectation of having to warm myself by holding my colostomy bag over a garbage fire one day. It doesn't make me Mother Teresa, or for that matter Don Knuth.
    For fuck's sake, could you at least try to troll with a little sense of artistry?



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    The real problem is that I've already come to associate your username with highly contrived attempts at flamebait, so it's kind of a wash.  I also think you could have taken the MVP bashing a bit further and garnered more laughs, but I'm guessing you're still a little gun-shy after your last effort ended so badly.

     

    I'm not really aiming to get a high number of stars. I do like to provoke discussion.

    I think we're still very much in the "barber surgeon" era of software development and, as such, widely held opinions in the field are often still immature and even incorrect. There are a great many people involved in the field who are basically incompetent: people who only program in one "pet" language; people without the necessary formal training for their jobs;people who eschew formal thinking and parrot vendor talking points instead; and so on.

    When I read comments like (paraphrasing) "Golly, don't make fun of Professor So-and-So; he could probably write a compiler single-handedly!" this only tends to confirm my analysis. If one hasn't written a compiler, or at least done maintenance-type work on one in a class, then what makes one feel competent to participate in this discussion? I ask this rhetorically- if you haven't done these things, then you're not qualified to dispute CS topics with me, or to hold many development jobs. And yet, such comments typify the state of thinking in this young discipline.

    I am not alone in my assessment of the state of software development as a field, or in my use of provocative commentary. I would give Prof. Ed Lee (author of "The Problem with Threads") and the late Prof. Edsger Dijkstra (author of "To Hell With Meaningful Identifiers" - as pure an example of flamebait as one might name) as examples of people with similar views who are nonetheless highly regarded.

     



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    I'm guessing you're still a little gun-shy after your last effort ended so badly.

     

    I'm not quite sure what you mean by that. I just looked at that IE6-related thread for the first time in a few days. It turns out that people in certain parts of the world experience even more difficulty getting their IE8 search bar to use Google than I did. In fact, it seems to be well nigh impossible for some people. So, in summary:

    1) I posted something perceived as inflamatory

    2) The inevitable conventional wisdom was loudly articulated by others

    3) A different group of people began pointing out an even more severe version of the problem I had originally mentioned

    4) The thread suddenly (and conveniently, for the conventional-wisdom-repeaters) went off-topic

    5) In this second thread, the usual suspects grimly declared the first thread to be a personal debacle from which I should "learn," as if I had just drunkenly run over someone in my Camaro

    I am sorry, but #5 makes no sense to me. The conclusion doesn't follow its premises.



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    The mockery of MVPs is less heavy-handed than your unhinged IE6 rant
    That was Bridget99, not this guy. 

    Goddammit why did I click Post?  I had something else to say.

    Or did I?  Does anyone know what it was?  It might have been important.



  • @belgariontheking said:

    @morbiuswilters said:

    The mockery of MVPs is less heavy-handed than your unhinged IE6 rant
    That was Bridget99, not this guy. 

    Goddammit why did I click Post?  I had something else to say.

    Or did I?  Does anyone know what it was?  It might have been important.

    Were you coming out?



  • @beau29 said:

    @morbiuswilters said:

    I'm guessing you're still a little gun-shy after your last effort ended so badly.

     

    I'm not quite sure what you mean by that. I just looked at that IE6-related thread for the first time in a few days. It turns out that people in certain parts of the world experience even more difficulty getting their IE8 search bar to use Google than I did. In fact, it seems to be well nigh impossible for some people.

    And just how did yoiu get the impression that people finding something hard to do indicated that it actually was difficult.  Just look at some of the posts on this site.

    @beau29 said:

    So, in summary:

    1) I posted something intended to be perceived as inflamatory

    2) The inevitable conventional wisdom contrasting view was loudly articulated by others

    3) A different group of people began pointing out an even more severe version of the problem  example of incompetent users than the one I had originally mentioned

    4) The thread suddenly (and conveniently, for the conventional-wisdom-repeaters) went off-topic as is to be expected on this board

    FTFY

    @beau29 said:

    5) In this second thread, the usual suspects grimly declared the first thread to be a personal debacle from which I should "learn," as if I had just drunkenly run over someone in my Camaro

    I am sorry, but #5 makes no sense to me. The conclusion doesn't follow its premises.

    They correctly determined your posts to be intentional trolling, and stated that the quality of your troll was inferior.



  • @belgariontheking said:

    @morbiuswilters said:
    The mockery of MVPs is less heavy-handed than your unhinged IE6 rant
    That was Bridget99, not this guy.

    They're not the same person?  And I thought beau wasn't a "guy".



  • @bstorer said:

    @belgariontheking said:

    @morbiuswilters said:

    The mockery of MVPs is less heavy-handed than your unhinged IE6 rant
    That was Bridget99, not this guy. 

    Goddammit why did I click Post?  I had something else to say.

    Or did I?  Does anyone know what it was?  It might have been important.

    Were you coming out?
    Perhaps he was going to tell us about his Alzheimer's?

    I knew a great joke about amnesia once, but I can't remember it now. 



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    @belgariontheking said:

    @morbiuswilters said:
    The mockery of MVPs is less heavy-handed than your unhinged IE6 rant
    That was Bridget99, not this guy.

    They're not the same person?  And I thought beau wasn't a "guy".

     

    I switched to the similar-looking Bridget99 after I started getting long, menacing PMs. I'm certain I mentioned that... go back and read all my posts and I'm sure you can find it. The name is a tribute to a really intelligent user of IMDB who posts all sorts of astute commentary on that site. 

    Apparently this computer still "remembers" the old ID... I usually just walk up to any old kiosk here at the Penitentiary's A/V center so it's hard to avoid that sort of thing.



  • @belgariontheking said:

    And I thought beau wasn't a "guy".

     

     

    This is true. I consider myself more of a "fop" or "raconteur" than a "guy."



  • Hmm, when I look in the mirror, I certainly don't see khaki pants, coffee mug and "CTPs". And I once were an MVP. It didn't even take more than my being helpful to become an MVP.

    Maybe the worst part to admit is that I were an MVP (embedded) because of a mediocre knowledge of VBScript as used on early Windows CE PDAs.

    (Let the bashing begin)



  • @beau29 said:

    I switched to the similar-looking Bridget99 after I started getting long, menacing PMs.
    The mods could help you with that.@beau29 said:
    go back and read all my posts and I'm sure you can find it.
    um, no thank you?@beau29 said:
    I usually just walk up to any old kiosk here at the Penitentiary's A/V center so it's hard to avoid that sort of thing.
    I'm pretty sure you never mentioned that you're in prison.  Not that I would remember if you had.



  • @dsckeld said:

    I once were an MVP
    @dsckeld said:
    I were an MVP

    Were you once capable of subject/verb agreement?



  • @beau29 said:

    I switched to the similar-looking Bridget99 after I started getting long, menacing PMs. I'm certain I mentioned that... go back and read all my posts and I'm sure you can find it.

    I don't remember you ever explicitly stating it, but your particular form of mild retardation is like a unique fingerprint so I realized both usernames were yours right away.



  • @bstorer said:

    @dsckeld said:

    I once were an MVP
    @dsckeld said:
    I were an MVP

    Were you once capable of subject/verb agreement?

    Is there a sick desktop gadget for that?



  • I dunno about the rest of you but I always find it refreshing when I meet a woman that hates the world as much as I do. Like a good example would be that lady who thinks that the health care reform bill will enstate senior death panels, or even Ann Coulter. I mean I don't actually know if this person is a woman or not, I'm just sort of fantasizing a mousy woman in her mid-30's wearing a black evening dress and some kind of diamond necklace, maybe even sipping on champagne as she spews bile hate-filled things onto the Internet.



  • @Dudehole said:

    I dunno about the rest of you but I always find it refreshing when I meet a woman that hates the world as much as I do. Like a good example would be that lady who thinks that the health care reform bill will enstate senior death panels, or even Ann Coulter. I mean I don't actually know if this person is a woman or not, I'm just sort of fantasizing a mousy woman in her mid-30's wearing a black evening dress and some kind of diamond necklace, maybe even sipping on champagne as she spews bile hate-filled things onto the Internet.
     

    I believe one of the finer points of trolling is to not be too obvious.

     



  • @beau29 said:

    @belgariontheking said:

    And I thought beau wasn't a "guy".

     

     

    This is true. I consider myself more of a "fop" or "raconteur" than a "guy."

     

    Raconteurs are entertaining.  cf Peter Ustinov, Clive James, Stephen Fry, etc, etc.

    And did you really compare yourself to Djikstra?



  • Oh, I really didn't mean to troll. I just thought the thread was so far gone there wouldn't be any harm in some meta commentary.



  • @stratos said:

    @Dudehole said:

    I dunno about the rest of you but I always find it refreshing when I meet a woman that hates the world as much as I do. Like a good example would be that lady who thinks that the health care reform bill will enstate senior death panels, or even Ann Coulter. I mean I don't actually know if this person is a woman or not, I'm just sort of fantasizing a mousy woman in her mid-30's wearing a black evening dress and some kind of diamond necklace, maybe even sipping on champagne as she spews bile hate-filled things onto the Internet.
     

    I believe one of the finer points of trolling is to not be too obvious.

     

     

    That's what the problem with "bridget99/beau29" is.



  • @upsidedowncreature said:

    @beau29 said:

    @belgariontheking said:

    And I thought beau wasn't a "guy".

     

     

    This is true. I consider myself more of a "fop" or "raconteur" than a "guy."

     

    Raconteurs are entertaining.  cf Peter Ustinov, Clive James, Stephen Fry, etc, etc.

    And did you really compare yourself to Djikstra?

    I think you'll find that you can compare any two things, regardless of how dissimilar they are.



  • @bstorer said:

    I think you'll find that you can compare any two things, regardless of how dissimilar they are.
     

    You bested me with your cunning!  Damn you bstorer!



  • @bstorer said:

    I think you'll find that you can compare any two things, regardless of how dissimilar they are.

    That only holds true in a weakly-typed universe.



  •  @morbiuswilters said:

    @bstorer said:

    I think you'll find that you can compare any two things, regardless of how dissimilar they are.

    That only holds true in a weakly-typed universe.

     They're all vars.



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    @bstorer said:

    I think you'll find that you can compare any two things, regardless of how dissimilar they are.

    That only holds true in a weakly-typed universe.

    All I know is that this universe doesn't use duck typing.  Sure, they looked like ducks and sounded like ducks, but I still went to prison for hunting children in duck costumes.  Worst Halloween ever.



  • @bstorer said:

    @morbiuswilters said:

    @bstorer said:

    I think you'll find that you can compare any two things, regardless of how dissimilar they are.

    That only holds true in a weakly-typed universe.

    All I know is that this universe doesn't use duck typing.  Sure, they looked like ducks and sounded like ducks, but I still went to prison for hunting children in duck costumes.  Worst Halloween ever.

    It's the goddamn Libruuls.


Log in to reply
 

Looks like your connection to What the Daily WTF? was lost, please wait while we try to reconnect.