This is only the beginning...



  • I live in a suburban condo complex that mostly houses single 20-30-somethings. The neighbors are nice, but we're not a tight knit group. One neighbor on the first floor I have long conversations with in the occasions where we bump into eachother in the corridors. At some point in my conversations, I made the mistake of mentioning I was a computer programmer. You know that means I am automatically able to program his DVD player, wire his car stereo, and hack into his cellphone network so he gets free bandwidth on his data plan. I don't know his exact age, but I'll wager he's at most 35.

    Yesterday he knocked on my door. "Dude, you gotta help me," he said. "I just bought a new computer, and I have barely turned it on and I'm already confused."

     I come to find out that he never owned a computer before in his life, something I find shocking in the year 2009 for anyone under 40. So, I go downstairs to see what he was stuck on: The EULA agreement for Windows Vista. "I just don't know what to do!"

    I explained to him in layman's terms it's just an agreement that you will use the computer for legitimate purposes and will not duplicate the software to give to your friends. I instinctively reach my hand for air slightly above the desk where the mouse should go. I'm startled when I find it's nowhere to be found. "You don't have a mouse." He looked at me, puzzled. "Oh, crap, did I forget to order something?!" I look through the boxes on the floor, and find the unopened mouse. "Here it is." He answered, "I don't need that, in fact, I'm going to return it. The Dell clerk made a mistake." I answered, "You do need it, this is what you use to navigate the screen." He said, "But it's wireless. She explained what wireless Internet was and I told her I was going to plug it in, so she said I didn't need a wireless card."

     Pray for me, for I fear he will return with more problems. Many times.



  •  While every case is different, I would tell this guy to return the computer and buy a smartphone.  He made it this far without a computer, why change a good thing?

      iPhone would proabably be a good choice because of restrictions on users.

     



  •  Again, it just absolutely floors me when people spend a thousand dollars on a machine and don't bother to learn a damned thing about it.  For some reason, this phenominon seems to be exclusive to computers.



  •  Just explain to him that you program Computers.  That's a PC.  Totally different.



  • @Master Chief said:

     Again, it just absolutely floors me when people spend a thousand dollars on a machine and don't bother to learn a damned thing about it.  For some reason, this phenominon seems to be exclusive to computers.

     

    And cars!

    It's crazy how many people choose to ignore the various warning lights and continue driving, or never get an oil change.

     


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @Huf Lungdung said:

    And cars!

    It's crazy how many people choose to ignore the various warning lights and continue driving, or never get an oil change.

    Stole my thunder here. Though I've been driving around for 3 weeks now with an out-of-balance wheel because I can't seem to find a tire center around here that will actually do a balance/align/rotate job in a single day. Which is funny, because that's about 10 minutes of man time and 15 minutes sitting on the fancypants automatic alignment machine. I can get motor mounts and brakes replaced within 2 hours (which I could do myself) and yet I can't get basic tire service the same day AT ALL (which I cannot do myself, aside from the rotation bit).

    Actual conversation between me and the clerk at NTB at 11:00AM:
    "What's the wait time on a four wheel balance/align/rotate on a <my car>"
    "By 4PM tommorrow."
    "5 hours?"
    "No, 4PM to-mor-row"
    "You do realize it's 11AM and your garage is empty."
    "Other people have appointments."
    "YOUR GARAGE IS FUCKING EMPTY. THERE ARE EIGHT BAYS IN THERE, AND NOT A SINGLE CAR."
    "I don't make the rules"
    "You also don't make sense. <depart>"



  • Being a programmer (or, in my non-IT friends' words "Because I work with computers") I do seem to get roped in to do on-the-fly tech support for random people, their mates, grandmas, cats, etc.

    I know f*ck all about cars, apart from how to actually drive, and "warning lights mean something ain't right". I also know a lot of people who "work with cars". It doesn't mean I call them up every time I need to know something.... I actually find the manual and read it!!! Failing that, use Google or borrow a Haynes manual from the library. And then consider asking them what it might be, without pressuring them to fix it.

    I think this "Dude, you gotta help me" phenomenon is much worse for us in IT though..... Man, it's sooo annoying!



  •  I bought a supposedly-wireless phone once. I opened it up and it was full of wires.



  • Actually it can be operated without a mouse, but that isn't the point. He still doesn't understand the computer, regardless. What I have done with people who do not understand these things, if they need the computer for some thing(s) specific, is just install DOS and then write programs for the functions they need and then show them the program (usually using the F1, F2, F3, etc keys to activate various functions in the software). One person asked for a program to keep track of their catalog and generate reports to print out, I have done it and it was very good for them. And the source-code was kept on there too, in case they (or someone else) wanted to learn more about it later and modify it. These softwares may not be considered "user-friendly" by today's standards, but "user-friendly" is useless anyways and since the program was written only specifically for that person or group of people and that use it is simple to make it do the specific functions which they asked for when I wrote that program, simply push the correct function key.



  • @RHuckster said:

     I come to find out that he never owned a computer before in his life, something I find shocking in the year 2009 for anyone under 40.
    Remember those retards sitting way at the back in school flicking boogers at each other all day long? Remember wondering what the hell they'll do when they go out into the world? Well... @vt_mruhlin said:
    Just explain to him that you program Computers.  That's a PC.  Totally different.
    Win.




  • @RHuckster said:

    I live in a suburban condo complex that mostly houses single 20-30-somethings. The neighbors are nice, but we're not a tight knit group. One neighbor on the first floor I have long conversations with in the occasions where we bump into eachother in the corridors. At some point in my conversations, I made the mistake of mentioning I was a computer programmer. You know that means I am automatically able to program his DVD player, wire his car stereo, and hack into his cellphone network so he gets free bandwidth on his data plan. I don't know his exact age, but I'll wager he's at most 35.

    Yesterday he knocked on my door. "Dude, you gotta help me," he said. "I just bought a new computer, and I have barely turned it on and I'm already confused."

     I come to find out that he never owned a computer before in his life, something I find shocking in the year 2009 for anyone under 40. So, I go downstairs to see what he was stuck on: The EULA agreement for Windows Vista. "I just don't know what to do!"

    I explained to him in layman's terms it's just an agreement that you will use the computer for legitimate purposes and will not duplicate the software to give to your friends. I instinctively reach my hand for air slightly above the desk where the mouse should go. I'm startled when I find it's nowhere to be found. "You don't have a mouse." He looked at me, puzzled. "Oh, crap, did I forget to order something?!" I look through the boxes on the floor, and find the unopened mouse. "Here it is." He answered, "I don't need that, in fact, I'm going to return it. The Dell clerk made a mistake." I answered, "You do need it, this is what you use to navigate the screen." He said, "But it's wireless. She explained what wireless Internet was and I told her I was going to plug it in, so she said I didn't need a wireless card."

     Pray for me, for I fear he will return with more problems. Many times.

     

     

    You need to cut off his addiction to "I can't be arsed to think or learn hopefully someone else will for me" - next time you see him you will have to break the news to him by making an obvious side step to help him.  "Would like to help but i need to wash my stuffed cat" 



  • @zzo38 said:

    These softwares may not be considered "user-friendly" by today's standards, but "user-friendly" is useless anyways
    TRWTF



  • @zzo38 said:

    What I have done with people who do not understand these things, if they need the computer for some thing(s) specific, is just install DOS and blah blah blah
    TRWTF



  • @Helix said:

    You need to cut off his addiction to "I can't be arsed to think or learn hopefully someone else will for me" - next time you see him you will have to break the news to him by making an obvious side step to help him.  "Would like to help but i need to wash my stuffed cat"
    @q.b.o #3030 said:
    * Joins: dolske
    <NSA> ooh, a mozilla person, maybe he willhelp
    <NSA> dolske: want to help me and make me really happy?
    <dolske> maybe?
    <NSA> blindly do a r+ on a patch?
    <dolske> sorry, busy vacuuming my cat.
    <NSA> what about later?
    <dolske> it's a long-hair cat.
    <NSA> what about super later but before Firefox 3 ships?
    <dolske> you'll have to ask my cat.



  • @MeesterTurner said:

    Being a programmer (or, in my non-IT friends' words "Because I work with computers") I do seem to get roped in to do on-the-fly tech support for random people, their mates, grandmas, cats, etc.

     

     Being an electrical engineering student, most people think I'm some sort of electronics guru which can do everything, from fixing their TVs, to diagnose problems with their wireless networks. When I tell them that I can't, the standard answer is c'mon, don't be so selfish.

    Some people also see me as a mathematics guru which should be able to multiply 10-digit numbers in a blink. Or as someone which spends all his day doing work on a computer, I'm expected to know everything about MS Office and random internet pages.

    This phenomenon is not only annoying for IT people, it's annoying for engineering people too.



  • @Weng said:

    @Huf Lungdung said:

    And cars!

    It's crazy how many people choose to ignore the various warning lights and continue driving, or never get an oil change.

    Stole my thunder here. Though I've been driving around for 3 weeks now with an out-of-balance wheel because I can't seem to find a tire center around here that will actually do a balance/align/rotate job in a single day. Which is funny, because that's about 10 minutes of man time and 15 minutes sitting on the fancypants automatic alignment machine. I can get motor mounts and brakes replaced within 2 hours (which I could do myself) and yet I can't get basic tire service the same day AT ALL (which I cannot do myself, aside from the rotation bit).

    Actual conversation between me and the clerk at NTB at 11:00AM:
    "What's the wait time on a four wheel balance/align/rotate on a <my car>"
    "By 4PM tommorrow."
    "5 hours?"
    "No, 4PM to-mor-row"
    "You do realize it's 11AM and your garage is empty."
    "Other people have appointments."
    "YOUR GARAGE IS FUCKING EMPTY. THERE ARE EIGHT BAYS IN THERE, AND NOT A SINGLE CAR."
    "I don't make the rules"
    "You also don't make sense. <depart>"

     

    "Can I talk to the person who does make the rules?"

    It probably won't work but it's only another 10 seconds of your life wasted.



  • My main defence to this is to say that I get paid to work on a computer larger than a refrigerator and these little things that you call "computers" are not within my field of expertise.

    It could be worse - I bet doctors get people coming up to them all the time and asking them to look at really ugly things.  "You're a brain surgeon, right?  Could you just take a look at this hairy mole on my ass?"



  • @zzo38 said:

    is just install DOS and then write programs for the functions they need
    @zzo38 said:
    These softwares may not be considered "user-friendly" by today's standards, but "user-friendly" is useless anyways
    @zzo38 said:
    ... etc ...
    Are you TopCod3r's mum?



  •  @Zagyg said:

    @zzo38 said:
    is just install DOS and then write programs for the functions they need
    @zzo38 said:
    These softwares may not be considered "user-friendly" by today's standards, but "user-friendly" is useless anyways
    @zzo38 said:
    ... etc ...
    Are you TopCod3r's mum?
    He's mostly insane. Userfriendly IS useless though...



  • @RHuckster said:

    Pray for me, for I fear he will return with more problems. Many times.

    "First call was free. Now it's $50 in cash for up to an hour, and $40 per hour after that".



  • @Master Chief said:

     Again, it just absolutely floors me when people spend a thousand dollars on a machine and don't bother to learn a damned thing about it.  For some reason, this phenominon seems to be exclusive to computers.

     

     My wife is a Chiropractor... when she mentions that she gets to hear a lot about peoples aches and pains.

     She swears someday when she's at a part and someone asks her what she does, she's going to claim to be a gynecologist, because she figures no one will ask her for a pap smear at a party.

     



  • @FriedDan said:

    @Master Chief said:

     Again, it just absolutely floors me when people spend a thousand dollars on a machine and don't bother to learn a damned thing about it.  For some reason, this phenominon seems to be exclusive to computers.

     

     My wife is a Chiropractor... when she mentions that she gets to hear a lot about peoples aches and pains.

     She swears someday when she's at a part and someone asks her what she does, she's going to claim to be a gynecologist, because she figures no one will ask her for a pap smear at a party.

     

     

     

    I would, sounds fun


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