Must be a Virus



  • I had just sat down to eat lunch when one of our "Procurement Specialists" ran into my office freaking out. She said something like “Help...I can't...everything closing down...e-mail won't come...do I have a virus”. I asked her to show me so we walked over to her office and she sat down and clicked on the start menu button. It closed instantly and she said “SEE...is that a virus???”. I responded with “No, that's a stack of papers holding your esc key down”. Now I'm eating the rest of my lunch.



  • Virus definition: anything that happens on the computer that the user does not expect or understand. Examples of viruses include office suite autosaves, a child changing the desktop wallpaper, shift+enter inserting a linebreak instead of sending a chat message, and tab not stepping through form fields in a predictable order ... oh, and all those icons in the system tray - they're spyware.



  • @TarquinWJ said:

    Virus definition: anything that happens on the computer that the user does not expect or understand. Examples of viruses include office suite autosaves, a child changing the desktop wallpaper, shift+enter inserting a linebreak instead of sending a chat message, and tab not stepping through form fields in a predictable order ... oh, and all those icons in the system tray - they're spyware.
     

     

    You forgot my favorite - the one where a 'virus' on your computer accidently emails a dirty picture to your mom. 



  • @aesis said:

    You forgot my favorite - the one where a 'virus' on your computer accidently emails a dirty picture to your mom.
    Ah, so that's why she doesn't talk to me any more...



  • I get calls like that at least once a week. It's depressing, but satisfying to just move the papers from their keyboard and leave them feeling stupid.


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