E-commerce 2.0 chat staff



  •  In order to save time and be in compliance with the oft-confusing world of Oregon retail diesel fuel tax, I decided to look into ordering some custom carbon copy forms.

    I found a promising sounding website, www.printingblue.com/carbonlessforms-printing.asp, that could print custom forms.

    While the page was still loading, I started scrolling down to find some pricing info.The page jumped back to the top of the page, which I chalked up to having finished loading, so I started scrolling back down. To my suprise, it jumped back to the top of the page again.

    I tried a few more times, but again and again, I would be returned to the top of the page. On furthur investigation, I was being brought to the top of the page by a dialog box with the following text:

     PrintingBlue Live Chat

    Natasha : 1`

    Natasha : Please ask if You need any assistance!
    Nancy : Hi and welcome to printingblue.coms LIVE chat support. This is Nancy here to assist you with your printing requirements.
    Nancy : Please ask if You need any assistance!
    Nancy : looking for carbonless paper printing?
    Nancy : may i assist you on that?
    Nancy : i am LIVE here for your help

    Every few seconds, when the chat dialog refreshed itself, the browser would be taken back to the dialog box, preventing me from finding what it was I wanted on the page. The journey of fun continued:
    You : your form is preventing me from browsing your website
    Nancy : sorry for this
    Nancy : I am LIVE here you can ask to me what you want
    Nancy : I can provide you best job with discounted prices LIVE here
    Nancy : do you have your design file /art work ready?
    Nancy
    : Please note that, we offer FREE Graphic Design Services at
    printingblue.com with unlimited design revisions till your
    satisfaction...
    Nancy : are you with me?

    Nancy : i can quote you the best regarding your carbonless forms

    Nancy : please let me know if you getting my messages?

    Apparently I am not supposed to browse their site, but have a LIVE chat about what I am looking for... IM is the new phone, I guess...



  •  Excellent, both the technology and the staff are obnoxious!



  • I like this part of the page where they say they offer shipment to "all USA" and then proceed to [wrongly] list all of the states.  Idaho State? Wyoming Capital US states?  WTF?  There's a lot of other poor English on that page too...weak.

     Printingblue offers free design services for carbonless forms printing
    and free shipment in all USA and canada including but not limited to
    Alabama, Alaska, Arizona, Arkansas, California, Colorado, Connecticut,
    Delaware, Florida, Georgia, Hawaii, Idaho State, Illinois, Indiana,
    Iowa, Kansas, Kentucky , Louisiana, Maine, Maryland, Massachusetts,
    Michigan, Minnesota, Mississippi, Missouri, Montana, Nebraska, Nevada,
    New Hampshire, New Jersey, New Mexico, New York, North Carolina, North
    Dakota, Ohio, Oklahoma, Oregon, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island, South
    Carolina, South Dakota, Tennessee, Texas, Utah, Vermont, Virginia,
    Washington, West Virginia, Wisconsin, Wyoming Capital US states.



  • I wonder if this really was a living person given the short reply and the fact that this person didn't give a shit on the visitors concerns. The also over-emphasize the word LIVE. They kind of shout at you that this is fucking LIVE. If this was really live this wouldn't be necessary.

    <FONT color=#4169e1>" I can provide you best job with discounted prices LIVE here"</FONT> 

    "<FONT color=#4169e1>i can quote you the best regarding your carbonless forms</FONT> "

     

    They all sound so much like Pidgin-English.



  • I am trying to turn the tables on them.. its pretty funny..

     

    SP1 : Hi and welcome to printingblue.coms LIVE chat support. This is SP1 here to assist you with your printing requirements.
    SP1 : Please ask if You need any assistance!
    You : Hi and welcome to printingblue.coms LIVE chat support. This is Mark here to assist you with your printing requirements.
    You : Please ask if You need any assistance!
    SP1 : That is me ....
    You : looking for carbonless paper printing?
    SP1 : I am LIVE here to assist you
    You : may i assist you on that?
    You : i am LIVE here for your help
    You : I am LIVE here you can ask to me what you want
    You : I can provide you best job with discounted prices LIVE here
    You : are you with me?
    SP1 : That is not right sent.
    SP1 : LOL..
    You : i can quote you the best regarding your carbonless forms
    You : So what can i help you with today SP1
    You : please let me know if you getting my messages?
    SP1 : OK..
    SP1 : I need 2000 NCR
    You : Sure thing
    You : do you have your design file /art work ready?
    SP1 : no
    You : Oke what kind of NCR are you specifically looking for ?
    SP1 : 2 parts with perfor. and landscap type
    You : And you want 2000 of those
    You
    : Please note that, we offer FREE Graphic Design Services at
    printingblue.com with unlimited design revisions till your
    satisfaction...
    SP1 : yes
    You : Is there anything else you are looking for ?
    You : i can quote you the best regarding your carbonless forms
    You : please let me know if you getting my messages?
    You : i am LIVE here for your help
    You : SP1, are you still here ?


     



  • LOL, that's soo funny!

    I went to that site and same thing happens to me, although it seems to happen periodically rather than everytime they reply, maybe on every Ajax refresh call.

    I was using Firefox, I seem to get a strange frame filling the entire top of the screen in IE7 though.



  • The plot thickens, Nancy is actualy.... Maria!

     

    SP1 : May i know your name?
    SP1 : You are not customer.. you are empl. of Printingblue
    You : Yes it is Nancy
    You : Hi and welcome to printingblue.coms LIVE chat support. This is Nancy here to assist you with your printing requirements.
    You : Hey, do you know whats for lunch today ?
    SP1 : Maria?

     



  • Okay, so i thought this might just be one another bot annoyingly built in their website.

    Just had to try it. Almost seems like there are real people talking to you LIVE... Well meant probably, but OMG how annoying!


    And for Muntrue: keep harassing them. This site is just SCREEMING for it (and it's LIVE).



  • Tracy : Hi and welcome to printingblue.coms LIVE chat support. This is Tracy here to assist you with your printing requirements.
    [snip]
    Tracy : I can help you with all your printing needs! all you have to do is ask me!
    Tracy : I can help you with all your printing needs! all you have to do is ask me!
    You : 毎日新聞のニ
    You : スポー?
    Tracy : hello
    Tracy : can you speak english?
    You : よう!!
    Tracy : I can help you with printing

     Hilarity ensues. Thank-you!



  • Nancy : Please ask if You need any assistance!
    Nancy : How may i help you
    Nancy : feel free to ask me
    Nancy : I am LIVE here for your help
    Nancy : Just let me know your printing needs
    Nancy : i can provide you best possible job...
    Nancy : with discounted and unbeatable prices
    You : 出典 フリー百科事典『ウィキペディア
    Nancy : are you with me?
    You : 賛同していただけ
    Nancy : your system language is getting problem
    Nancy : too hard to read
    Nancy : may i know your name and email please
    You : support@printingblue.com
    Nancy : ok
    Nancy : thanks for sharing info



  •  This thread just took an awesome turn...totally killing my post-lunch productivity.



  • <font size="2" color="red" face="arial">You:</font><font size="2" color="black" face="arial"> allo?</font>
    <font size="2" color="blue" face="arial">maria: hi</font>
    <font size="2" color="blue" face="arial">maria: how may i help you?</font>
    <font size="2" color="red" face="arial">You:</font><font size="2" color="black" face="arial"> are you from the islands, dear?</font>
    <font size="2" color="blue" face="arial">maria: we are IL bassed.</font>
    <font size="2" color="blue" face="arial">maria: let me know your printing needs?</font>
    <font size="2" color="blue" face="arial">maria: i can provide you the best discounted prices LIVE here</font>
    <font size="2" color="red" face="arial">You:</font><font size="2" color="black" face="arial"> which impoverished nation are you from?</font>
    <font size="2" color="blue" face="arial">maria: ?</font>

    <form name="frmtxt"><input checked="checked" size="1" name="dmylink" type="checkbox"></form>



  • Maria : i can provide you the carbonless paper in cheaper price quote with your printing specs..
    You : sǝƃɐssǝɯ ɹnoʎ ƃuıʌıǝɔǝɹ ɯɐ ı
    You : ¡ǝʌıl noʎ oʇ ƃuıʞlɐʇ ɯɐ ı
    Maria : okay please hold
    Maria : we can only speak english
    You : ɥsılƃuǝ ƃuıʞɐǝds ɯɐ ı
    Maria : let me transfer your chat to some another person who can speak your language
    You : pǝddılɟ ʇsnɾ s,ʇı
    You : ¿sǝƃɐssǝɯ ʎɯ ƃuıʇʇǝƃ noʎ ɟı ʍouʞ ǝɯ ʇǝl ǝsɐǝld
    You : sɔǝds ƃuıʇuıɹd ɹnoʎ ɥʇıʍ ǝʇonb ǝɔıɹd ɹǝdɐǝɥɔ uı ɹǝdɐd ssǝluoqɹɐɔ ǝɥʇ noʎ ǝpıʌoɹd uɐɔ ı
    Maria : can you speak english?
    Maria : please let me know your language
    Maria : where you from?



  • Grins

     

     

    Tracy : Hi and welcome to printingblue.coms LIVE chat support. This is Tracy here to assist you with your printing requirements.
    Tracy : Please ask if You need any assistance!
    Tracy : looking for carbonless form printing?
    Tracy : may i assist you with that?
    You
    : Hello, this is Chris Hanson from Dateline NBC. I can see you are
    already seated so let me ask you. What do you think you are doing ?
    Tracy : ia m here live to assist you
    Tracy : hi chris :)
    Tracy : i got your email
    You : Hello Tracy. Why are you here ?
    Tracy : i got net discounted
    You : So because you got net discounted you think it is oke to do what you are doing ?
    Tracy : no no
    You : So in your mind, what justifies this ?
    Tracy : i forward your request to the conerned department for pricing
    You : Yes we have heard that excuse before
    Tracy : as soon i will get the quote i was made my mind to give you email
    Tracy : sorry for inconvience
    You : I have here a list of instant messages you made with our decoy Jonathan
    You : If you want i can read it
    You : You thought you were talking to a potentional costumer. But instead it was our decoy.
    You : You came here today to sell crap to unsuspected costumers
    You : Thats not right now is it Tracy..
    Tracy : i wasnot
    Tracy : yes i am Tracy :)
    You : So why did you bring that six pack of beer ?
    You : And what are you going to do with those condoms !?
    You : Please answer the question Tracy
    Tracy : chris i cannot tolerate such kind of language
    Tracy : its our business time
    You : You cannot tolerate that language
    Tracy : if you are interest to do print something i am here to assist you
    You : how about the vulgair language you spew about Carbonless forms
    You : I have the proof right here in the chatlog
    You : Tracy let me ask you something
    You : Is this the first time you did this ?
    Tracy : can you show me the prrof?
    Tracy : sorry i never use vulgar language with you
    You : Yes it is right here on the table
    You : Would you like to use vulgair language tho ?
    Tracy : no
    Tracy : chris can you hold for 20 minutes, i have break now
    Tracy : i will meat later
    You : Yes, im sure you do want meat later )
    You : Oke Tracy i will let you off the hook.

    You : Untill we meet again


     



  • Going Schwarzenegger didn't get me very far:

    PS -- I had to switch to IE in order to chat... Firefox (2.0.0.15) threw a bunch of javascript errors. 

    <font color="blue" face="arial" size="2">Natasha: Hi and welcome to
    printingblue.coms LIVE chat support. This is Natasha here to assist you with
    your printing requirements.</font>
    <font color="blue" face="arial" size="2">Natasha: Please ask if You need any assistance!</font>
    <font color="blue" face="arial" size="2">Natasha: are you looking for carbonless
    forms printing?</font>
    <font color="blue" face="arial" size="2">Natasha: may
    i assist you with that?</font>
    <font color="blue" face="arial" size="2">Natasha: feel free to ask</font>
    <font color="red" face="arial" size="2">You:</font><font color="black" face="arial" size="2"> I'm not into
    politics, I'm into survival</font>
    <font color="blue" face="arial" size="2">Natasha: i am here live to assist you</font>
    <font color="blue" face="arial" size="2">Natasha: ok</font>
    <font color="red" face="arial" size="2">You:</font><font color="black" face="arial" size="2"> Who is your daddy,
    and what does he do?</font>
    <font color="blue" face="arial" size="2">Natasha: let me know your required size and quantity for the
    carbonless forms?</font>
    <font color="red" face="arial" size="2">You:</font><font color="black" face="arial" size="2"> If I am not me,
    who da hell am I?</font>



  • I wonder... If there are more customers than chatmarketers logged in, do the poor creatures have to do chatmarketing with more than one client at once? I think so. Would be really cruel on them if the customer to agent ratio ever rose up to, say, 30:1.



  • [quote user="Renan "C#" Sousa"]

    I wonder... If there are more customers than chatmarketers logged in, do the poor creatures have to do chatmarketing with more than one client at once? I think so. Would be really cruel on them if the customer to agent ratio ever rose up to, say, 30:1.

    [/quote]These "live" systems usually are request-based ... you "press" a button or something and up comes the chat request. This site seems to have just put the damn chat in the front page, which is definitely upping the quantity of "customers" in live chats.

    I remember a friend working as one of these reps, it was fun to see what some people asked:

     

    Emma: Hi, this is Emma

    Customer3256892: Hi baby, can I have your phone number?



  • @danixdefcon5 said:

    I remember a friend working as one of these reps, it was fun to see what some people asked:

    Emma: Hi, this is Emma

    Customer3256892: Hi baby, can I have your phone number?

    Emma: It's 1-900-462-8739

Log in to reply
 

Looks like your connection to What the Daily WTF? was lost, please wait while we try to reconnect.