Medical WTF



  • Not technology related, but still...

    Ok, so I'm getting older, and had to sign up for a colonoscopy. For those who aren't familiar with this lovely little procedure, they basically shove the medical equivalent of a small garden hose up your butt, complete with camera, electric snare and cauterizer, so they can look at your insides and make sure nothing is amiss, all while you peacefully snooze through it.

    Naturally, in order to be able to see you (as opposed to what might be inside you), for the day before they prescribe a laxative that could clean out the Panama canal. When the nurse hands me the prescription, she advises me that it lasts 4-6 hours after you stop taking it, depending upon the person, and that I should take it until 4 hours before the procedure (scheduled for 7:30AM, 22 miles from my home).

    Um, wait a minute. I'm supposed to drive 20+ miles in rush hour traffic with a still-active industrial strength laxative inside me?

    I query. She shrugs.

    I decide to stop taking it 6.5 hours before I have to leave. I figure any doctor that chooses to be a GastroEnterologist ought to be accustomed to occasionally spelunking through a little muck.



  •  Alright. Who wants my lunch? I don't think I will be eating it now.



  • Sissy.  Just bring a bucket with you.  Problem solved. 



  • Dude.. that sucks. I'm completely familiar with what it involves, but I didn't know about the "industrial" laxative. I hated the radioactive milkshake that I had to drink for GI x-rays. They told me "you may need to take a laxative". I figured since I was there for chronic runs, I wouldn't need it. Ha! That barium seals you up like quick-set concrete. It really felt like I was passing a brick for 2 days. When it finally approached the exit, I swore it was going to tear me apart. I burned for days afterwards.

    @snoofle said:

    ought to be accustomed to occasionally spelunking through a little muck.

    LMAO!! The problem really isn't the diving.. it's the seeing polyps, etc. Can't find flaws if there is mud on the walls.



  • Get some diapers to go along with your Industrial Strength Laxatives. Don't forgeta trench coat and wig, bb-gun, pepper spray, knife and garbage bags. 

     

     



  • @snoofle said:

    Not technology related, but still...

    Ok, so I'm getting older, and had to sign up for a colonoscopy. For those who aren't familiar with this lovely little procedure, they basically shove the medical equivalent of a small garden hose up your butt, complete with camera, electric snare and cauterizer, so they can look at your insides and make sure nothing is amiss, all while you peacefully snooze through it.

    Naturally, in order to be able to see you (as opposed to what might be inside you), for the day before they prescribe a laxative that could clean out the Panama canal. When the nurse hands me the prescription, she advises me that it lasts 4-6 hours after you stop taking it, depending upon the person, and that I should take it until 4 hours before the procedure (scheduled for 7:30AM, 22 miles from my home).

    Um, wait a minute. I'm supposed to drive 20+ miles in rush hour traffic with a still-active industrial strength laxative inside me?

    I query. She shrugs.

    I decide to stop taking it 6.5 hours before I have to leave. I figure any doctor that chooses to be a GastroEnterologist ought to be accustomed to occasionally spelunking through a little muck.

     I'd just like to know what made you feel the need to share this little personal nugget?  I believe I speak for most of my fellow forum users, when I say that we could have lived without knowing the medical history of your anus.  And thank you...For the nightmares that will now haunt me in my sleep.   



  • @galgorah said:

    I believe I speak for most of my fellow forum users, when I say that we could have lived without knowing the medical history of your anus. 
     

    And yet, you still decided to quote the entire OP, despite your opinion that no one needed to see it...

    I guess you two are even now.



  • @galgorah said:

    I'd just like to know what made you feel the need to share this little personal nugget?

    It sounds like way more than a nugget..  maybe the mother lode.

     

    in b4 you are flamed for quoting the OP



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    in b4 you are flamed for quoting the OP

     

    OWNED.

     

    :-)



  • @MasterPlanSoftware said:

    OWNED.

     

    :-)

    I knew you'd be too quick for me!

     

    Seriously, people, quoting the OP isn't an offense against nature, but it is redundant and makes it harder to catch up on threads because you end up scrolling past the same junk over and over.  Also, if you aren't replying to the OP, please quote for some context.  It doesn't have to be the entire post you are replying to, but if I have to click "In Reply To" just to figure out who in the hell you're talking to, I'm more likely to just ignore your comment.  This is basic forum etiquette that not only helps the reader but also helps your point come through more clearly.  Thanks.



  • @snoofle said:

    I decide to stop taking it 6.5 hours before I have to leave. I figure any doctor that chooses to be a GastroEnterologist ought to be accustomed to occasionally spelunking through a little muck.
     

    Bad idea. As others have pointed out, you're putting yourself at risk. American doctors don't do the most careful colonoscopies anyhow, and are probably using standards that are too crude.

    See this article, for example.



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    quoting the OP isn't an offense against nature
     

    Yes it is. Offenders should be catapulted straight into a brick wall.

     

    Good PSA though.



  • @morbiuswilters said:

    <font color="#ff0000" size="5">Seriously, people, quoting the OP isn't an offense against nature, but it is redundant and makes it harder to catch up on threads because you end up scrolling past the same junk over and over.  Also, if you aren't replying to the OP, please quote for some context.  It doesn't have to be the entire post you are replying to, but if I have to click "In Reply To" just to figure out who in the hell you're talking to, I'm more likely to just ignore your comment.  This is basic forum etiquette that not only helps the reader but also helps your point come through more clearly.  Thanks.</font>
    Can we get this posted right above the post button?



  • @bstorer said:

    Can we get this posted right above the post button?
     

    Honestly, I would like to see the post button do the uberannoying 'Are you sure?' cycle. (Maybe 4 or 5 times?)

    I am sure it wouldn't help, but at least it might send a little extra annoyance back to some people who just cannot seem to be bothered to read what they post before clicking the post button. </runonsentence>



  • @bstorer said:

    Can we get this posted right above the post button?
    New sig!



  • @Lingerance said:

    New sig!
     

    Haha wow. And I bet everyone thought I would be the one to do that... 

    Very Nice! </BoratImitation>



  • @MasterPlanSoftware said:

    @bstorer said:

    Can we get this posted right above the post button?
     

    Honestly, I would like to see the post button do the uberannoying 'Are you sure?' cycle. (Maybe 4 or 5 times?)

    How about just some validation code that rejects posts where you're quoting somebody else's entire post, provided their post is more than, say, five lines?

    Sorry, your post has been rejected.  Read this huge, red text by morbiuswilters and try again.



  • @Lingerance said:

    New sig!

    Holy shit! That's gonna be murder in every thread you posted in. Quick -- take it off!



  • @AbbydonKrafts said:

    Holy shit! That's gonna be murder in every thread you posted in. Quick -- take it off!
    I don't post that frequently. I'll keep it up for a week or so though unless the mods intervene. Although it's better than what could happen, refer to Youtube 0.1



  • @AbbydonKrafts said:

    take it off!
     

    Indeed!



  • Ha.  got me on that one.  sorry bout that guys.



  • @Lingerance said:

    refer to Youtube 0.1

    Ah, but at least it's trapped in a single thread. I definitely regret when I stumble into it, though. But your sig.. it's sprinkled everywhere! My eyes!



    It's ok.. I'll let you school those that need it.



  • I will say the sig is amusing the first few times you see it but quickly gets annoying.



  • @galgorah said:

    Ha.  got me on that one.  sorry bout that guys.
    Aw, crap.  A genuine apology?  We're not equipped to handle that.  But wait, you also didn't quote who you were replying to!  Aha!

    <font color="#ff0000" size="5">Also, if you aren't replying to the OP,
    please quote for some context. It doesn't have to be the entire post
    you are replying to, but if I have to click "In Reply To" just to
    figure out who in the hell you're talking to, I'm more likely to just
    ignore your comment. This is basic forum etiquette that not only helps
    the reader but also helps your point come through more clearly.  Thanks.</font>



  • @galgorah said:

    I will say the sig is amusing the first few times you see it but quickly gets annoying.
    I'll drop the size one factor.



  • @bstorer said:

    But wait, you also didn't quote who you were replying to!  Aha!

    I'm gonna come through these intertubes and kick you. It's starting to look like the place is on fire.



  • @Lingerance said:

    I'll drop the size one factor.

    That actually works out to an almost perfect paragraph at my current screen resolution. Now if you could drop to more of a burgandy color, it would probably look pretty good.



  • @Lingerance said:

    Big Long Red Sig

    But that sig itself is waaaaayy worse than a large redundant quote.



  • @bstorer said:

    Aw, crap.  A genuine apology?  We're not equipped to handle that.  But wait, you also didn't quote who you were replying to!  Aha!

     This better?  I just assumed that you would check the in reply to link if you hadn't been reading the whole thread.  I'll blame my judgement slips on multitasking.  Hows that?



  • @AbbydonKrafts said:

    @bstorer said:
    But wait, you also didn't quote who you were replying to!  Aha!

    I'm gonna come through these intertubes and kick you. It's starting to look like the place is on fire.

    Then you probably don't want to look at this post.



  • @Lingerance said:

    I'll drop the size one factor.

    Thanks.  thats actually much better.



  • @shadowman said:

    @Lingerance said:

    Big Long Red Sig

    But that sig itself is waaaaayy worse than a large redundant quote.

     

    No. Nothing is worse than quoting the OP in entirety,

    Read the sig. Know the sig. Live by the sig.



  • @AbbydonKrafts said:

    Now if you could drop to more of a burgandy color, it would probably look pretty good.
    Hex code? I don't have anything for drawing on this computer, but I'll switch it to my site's teal or purple color for now. PS Or by accident it's a dim red.



  • @galgorah said:

    @bstorer said:

    But wait, you also didn't quote who you were replying to! 

     This better?  I just assumed that you would check the in reply to link if you hadn't been reading the whole thread.  I'll blame my judgement slips on multitasking.  Hows that?

     

    FTFY - Much better now.



  • @bstorer said:

    Then you probably don't want to look at this post.
     

    I'm filing an objection to the color scheme. 

    Edit: Looks like they beat me to it.



  • @Lingerance said:

    Hex code? I don't have anything for drawing on this computer, but I'll switch it to my site's teal or purple color for now. PS Or by accident it's a dim red.

    I basically meant anything close to #800000. It looks good now. Doesn't scar the retina so much, but still gets attention.



  • @bstorer said:

    Then you probably don't want to look at this post.

    It's Christmas! It's beginning to look at lot like Christmas..



  • @shadowman said:

    But that sig itself is waaaaayy worse than a large redundant quote.

    To bring this somewhat back on topic, think of it like medicine.  Sure, it may initially seem worse than the disease, but if it reduces the number of stupid posts, it will be beneficial in the long run.  Also, Lingerance's huge, red sig is a lot easier to mentally filter out than 80 lines of OP followed by "LOL, I had this same problem!" 



  • @snoofle said:

    I decide to stop taking it 6.5 hours before I have to leave. I figure any doctor that chooses to be a GastroEnterologist ought to be accustomed to occasionally spelunking through a little muck.

     

    Yes it stops working after about four hours which is fine.  Just don't eat anything after that and before the 'scopy.  Seriously, once you are cleaned out, how is it going to get mucked up again if you don't push anything down it?  So don't eat, have the test, and chow down afterwards.   



  • @bstorer said:

    Then you probably don't want to look at this post.
    Yay. ++sig. I have the strange feeling my sig will continue to grow throughout the day.



  • @Lingerance said:

    @bstorer said:
    Then you probably don't want to look at this post.
    Yay. ++sig. I have the strange feeling my sig will continue to grow throughout the day.
    We need to keep tacking on to it until we develop a forum constitution in a fabulous rainbow of DOs and DON'Ts.



  • @bstorer said:

    We need to keep tacking on to it until we develop a forum constitution in a fabulous rainbow of DOs and DON'Ts.

    Perhaps a page on the site that specified forum rules would help.  a rules sig would clog up entire threads.



  • @AbbydonKrafts said:

    ...LMAO!! The problem really isn't the diving.. it's the seeing polyps, etc. Can't find flaws if there is mud on the walls.

    True - that's why I didn't eat for 36 hours before, per doctor; had it done this morning; apparently, all is well! Pictures are sort of like being on a real-life Fantastic voyage...



  • @galgorah said:

    @bstorer said:

    We need to keep tacking on to it until we develop a forum constitution in a fabulous rainbow of DOs and DON'Ts.

    Perhaps a page on the site that specified forum rules would help.  a rules sig would clog up entire threads.

    Whatever, as long as there's a fabulous rainbow...


  • @snoofle said:

    True - that's why I didn't eat for 36 hours before, per doctor;
    I hope you didn't have four doctors. Isn't the amount of time one can go without food 3 days, 4 * 1.5 == 6 would be well over that.
    @snoofle said:
    Pictures are sort of like being on a real-life Fantastic voyage...

    Please don't share. Really. It's fine, we can imagine if we want to.



  • @Lingerance said:

    Please don't share. Really. It's fine, we can imagine if we want to.
    And we don't.



  • @bstorer said:

    Whatever, as long as there's a fabulous rainbow...
    I heartily agree.  The rules should be represented by the colors of the rainbow. 



  • @galgorah said:

    I heartily agree.  The rules should be represented by the colors of the rainbow. 
    Cue someone bitching because you didn't quote anyone. . .



  • @snoofle said:

    True - that's why I didn't eat for 36 hours before, per doctor;

    Damn. I doubt I'd be able to go that long without eating without going mad at the same time.

    @snoofle said:

    had it done this morning; apparently, all is well! Pictures are sort of like being on a real-life Fantastic voyage...

    I don't think I'd ever want to see the pictures if I had that done.



  • @Lingerance said:

    @galgorah said:
    I heartily agree.  The rules should be represented by the colors of the rainbow. 
    Cue someone bitching because you didn't quote anyone. . .

    ya I tried to edit and did not make it in time


Log in to reply
 

Looks like your connection to What the Daily WTF? was lost, please wait while we try to reconnect.