Mashup Challenge $100,000 prize - WTF if Spectate Swamp wins?



  • @Charles Capps said:

    I think I get it now.  I understand his code delusion.  He's a tinkerer that never grew out of it.

    Back in the long-gone early era of The First Giant Desktop Search Tread, I was thinking that Swampy reminded me a lot of my younger, much dumber self. I had written a small tiny little program that let you make arbitrary kinds of records and store them in file. Clearly million times better than Cardfile or dBase! Open data formats! So, when someone in a Linux newsgroup wanted to hear what databases are available, I was offering my little production to them. Others offered real databases. Oh god how embarrassed I was when I learnt what real databases do.

    That thing taught me a few things really well: It's perfectly okay for you to release your crappy little it-works-for-me-ship-it programs that helped you do your things - but it's entirely different thing to market it as best thing since sliced bread if it isn't that. It might also pay to do some research how things work in real world. =) In short, it's always nice to try not to disappoint people. Swampy is promising the moon and the heavens to everyone who uses SSDS; people are irate when they don't actually get them. Makes sense.

    (I think I've mentioned how I've found inspiration and learned Everything You Need To Know About Software Engineering from the developer quotes of Ultima games (for example, a wise and appropriate quote to consider, from Ultima VIII: "We're not necessarily as brilliant as some of the things we've done might lead us to believe.") I believe one fact from the games themselves would be an interesting fact to consider here: Humility is a virtue that can only be understood through its corresponding Anti-Virtue, Pride.)



  • Sorry everyone, I think I'm the one who inadvertently gave Spectate teh idea that SSDS can find aliens.

    Also, I believe that "Jam It" is swamp-speak for "compile" 



  • @Eternal Density said:

    Also, I believe that "Jam It" is swamp-speak for "compile" 
     

    No, I think he really means "jam it" in the musical sense, as in "improvise" or work by trial and error.

    http://channel9.msdn.com/ShowPost.aspx?PostID=257343#257343 

    @SpectateUnabomber said:



    My way of programming and testing is to jam it. See results as
    it progresses and then change those displays to comments later.

     



  • Finding Aliens with Swamp Search

    @rc_pinchey said:

    Ah, ok, let's see some pictures of the alien you've captured then. Do you keep it in a box or a jar?

    I'm trying and trying to upload the latest scene from a "contact" video where the flyer overtakes a crow in flight and then zooms away. Maybe I have reached my archive.org max? There are a few more video where I captured the flyers engaging with birds, helicopters and a paraglider.

     

    First you find the aliens then you Share them.



  • @SpectateSwamp said:

    There are a few more video where I captured the flyers engaging with birds, helicopters and a paraglider.
     

    Again, I have to ask you: WAS IT YOUR CAMCORDER OR SSDS THAT "CAPTURED" THE "ALIEN" FOOTAGE?

    If it was your camcorder, then why the f should we care about SSDS again?  Especially when you told another forum they could use VIDEO EDITING SOFTWARE (NOT SSDS) to look at video artifacts (i.e. aliens).



  • @SpectateSwamp said:

    First you find the aliens then you Share them.
     

    Also, was it SSDS or archive.org that allowed you to SHARE THE "ALIEN" VIDEO?  If it was archive.org, WHY SHOULD WE CARE ABOUT SSDS AGAIN?



  • Aliens overtake Crow - Spectate Swamp is watching

    Flyer overtakes crow

     

    The Crow at the top got checked out by the this flyer. I'll upload the video later.



  • @SpectateSwamp said:

    @rc_pinchey said:

    Ah, ok, let's see some pictures of the alien you've captured then. Do you keep it in a box or a jar?

    I'm trying and trying to upload the latest scene from a "contact" video where the flyer overtakes a crow in flight and then zooms away.

     

    No, not "flyers", aliens. You said you've captured an alien, so I want to see a sodding alien. Not a leaf, not a bug, not a piece of fluff, an actual genuine real-life alien. 

     

    Actually, if I'm honest, I don't give a flying fuck about the videos of normal things happening in normal situations, all I really want to see is you cursing someone. Weren't you going to curse me so that I lost my keys?

    Or if cursing is too dangerous (as it might destroy the world), how about a blessing? Could you do a blessing on us so that we could understand SSDS and see some aliens? 



  • @rc_pinchey said:

    Or if cursing is too dangerous (as it might destroy the world), how about a blessing curse? Could you do a blessing curse on us so that we could understand SSDS and see some aliens?

    Fixed that for you...

    I don't think I ever want to be at that point where I have a complete revelation about how SSDS works and think that GOTOs are the greatest things in the world.

    I remember the first month of my QBASIC class, I went ahead and started to learn how to do some stuff on my own... and discovered GOTOs.  I was so happy that I told my teacher... who immediately told me that he would fail me if I used them in my programs.  I didn't see the danger in using GOTOs for my own personal projects... so I did.  Through the rest of my course, I saw how much better my school programs were without GOTOs than my own personal programs and realized which was better. 



  • Swampy - 3-dimensional space: DO YOU UNDERSTAND IT?

    Obviously not, so here's some diagrams to explain this last image of yours:

    1. A top-down view of the scene. Red lines = camera's field of view. Blue = UFO's path. Green = Tracking line between camera and crow

    Your UFO passes between you and the crow, but your utter lack of spatial awareness makes you believe the UFO "buzzed" the crow. Don't you know anything? Aliens are much more interested in cows than crows. That missing 'r' makes quite a difference in species. 


    2. A side view of the same scene. Again, notice your "ufo" passing between you and the camera. Just cause it looks like two things touched on your screen doesn't mean they did in real life.

     

    Pardon your bad-beard-day, I can't draw beards in Paintbrush very well. And no doubt you're not quite as anorexic as the diagram makes you out to be.

    If you're standing on the street talking with a friend, and someone passes between the two of you, did either of you get hit? knocked out? buzzed? No. But it sure looks like it, because that person blocked your view of your friend. By your spatial rules, that means your friend got hit by an Unidentified Passer-By. UPBs are dangerous sorts, making friends appear and disappear.

     

    So, class, what have we learned today? Let's review, shall we?

    1. Cow is spelled C.O.W. Not C.R.O.W. If you have trouble differentiating, remember that cows go 'moo' and are tasty when grilled and placed between two pieces of bread. Crows don't, and aren't.
    2. Aliens like COWS. They don't bother CROWS.
    3. Three-dimensional action, when projected onto a 2-dimensional surface, can make things appear to touch when in reality they're miles apart
    4. Swampy will ignore this totally, or reply with a non-sequitur about how someone could add 3D support to SSDS, because the hilite and line-wrap flowcharts are there.
    5. Having yammered about 3d support in SSDS, he will submit SSDS to SIGGRAPH, but will get rejected because it's a vast conspiracy by the alien fliers to make Swampy look bad.

     



  • @rc_pinchey said:

    @SpectateSwamp said:

    But can they capture aliens. Can they? Swamp Search does.
     

    Ah, ok, let's see some pictures of the alien you've captured then. Do you keep it in a box or a jar?

    No no no, he keeps them in a plain text file in C:\search.



  • Aliens check out Helicopter next - with Spectate Swamp

    flyer overtakes crow

    This scene is from 1 second earlier. The Flyer doesn't even take a direct route to the crow and closes in on it very fast. These specks are hard to see and requires really really looking. But I guess when you know everything there is to know. And are paid to have all the answers. Why look. Question: How fast is the Speck moving if the crow is doing 30mph. First you have to assume that they are very close at the 42:13 scene. Maybe the helicopter contact will be more clear. I haven't looked at that clip in years.



  • @SpectateSwamp said:

    These specks are hard to see and requires really really looking.

    I see a hundred specs just like the ones you circled. Its not an alien, its an imperfection in your digital camcorder.



  • There's no point to this discussion any more, it like an endless loop of madness.. Lets quit posting on this thread. If Spectate wants to continue, just let him, he's not here for help or to listen to anyone else.



  • Aliens check out Helicopter next - with Spectate Swamp

    Flyer overtakes helicopter

     

    The original video is small 5.2mb only 10 seconds of video. Clean your glasses PitchingSwamp. You'll see them. Thanks for looking.

     

    I will dig up the other "Contact" videos where the Flyers interact with other moving objects.

     



  • @SpectateSwamp said:

    ..picture of speck going after helicopter..

    SAM going for the 'copter! Did you catch the following explosion?



  • @pitchingchris said:

    There's no point to this discussion any more, it like an endless loop of madness.. Lets quit posting on this thread. If Spectate wants to continue, just let him, he's not here for help or to listen to anyone else.

     

    Or YOU could stop if you want to, and let everyone else do whatever they want....



  • Clean your glasses SpectatePinchey! You'll see them. More of Lots. The Aliens Jam It here.

     

    Also, stop being a twat. Reading your posts is like watching Wimbledon wearing a neckbrace and sandpaper contact lenses. I want a video of you either cursing or blessing one or all of us, and I won't be happy 'til I get it. 



  • @SpectateSwamp said:

    The original video is small 5.2mb only 10 seconds of video. Clean your glasses PitchingSwamp. You'll see them. Thanks for looking.


    I will dig up the other "Contact" videos where the Flyers interact with other moving objects.

    What on earth are you doing with your life? If this is honestly the best way you find of amusing yourself, filming insects flying while out of focus, then god help you. The camera was focusing at the correct distance for the helicopter and something small was between you and it - this is obviously going to be an unfocused blob. Given it is closer then due to paralax (as somebody else explained earlier) it appears to be travelling far faster than it really is.

     



  • @rc_pinchey said:

    (...img...)

    Clean your glasses SpectatePinchey! You'll see them. More of Lots. The Aliens Jam It here.

     

    You missed some...

     -----

    This thread is amazing. From crappy software, via holey stones, to 1-pixel Ufo's. What will be next, and do we really want to know?

     

     



  • @ArieLex said:

    @rc_pinchey said:

    (...img...)

    Clean your glasses SpectatePinchey! You'll see them. More of Lots. The Aliens Jam It here.

     

    You missed some...

     -----

    This thread is amazing. From crappy software, via holey stones, to 1-pixel Ufo's. What will be next, and do we really want to know?

     

    Well, in the old thread... he did mention Big Foot.  I hope he meant the monster truck... 



  • @WeatherGod said:

    Back in my undergraduate days, there was this woman who kept calling our university's weather center complaining that we were somehow changing the sunset and sunrise time.  "I am on to you", she would say.  Of course, students answering her calls would ask if there were any mountains or tall hills nearby and she affirmed that she lived in a valley.  Students then went on to explain that the sunset and sunrise times in the almanac were for a level horizon and wouldn't be perfectly correct when there are mountains nearby.  Even after being told that several times, she still claimed that the university was doing something to mess up her sunrise and sunsets.

    Haven't made it through the entire thread yet, but I have to comment on this.

    I think the best part is that she has the time to care exactly when the sun rises and sets, and then the balls to complain about it when it doesn't match up.  What does she need the sunrise time for that's that important?



  • @belgariontheking said:

    What does she need the sunrise time for that's that important?
     

    Holey stone dancing rituals?

     

    MommySwamp!



  • asdasdasdasdasd

     



  •  @ZippoLag said:

     



  • Birds can see Aliens

    Bird sees alien@CodeSimian said:

    Again, I have to ask you: WAS IT YOUR CAMCORDER OR SSDS THAT "CAPTURED" THE "ALIEN" FOOTAGE?
    To capture these Aliens. You'd need to train a bird to spring the trapdoor. They are the only ones that can see these intruders in realtime. Any kind of bird should do?



  • @SpectateSwamp said:

    train a bird to spring the trapdoor

    Man, I'm laughing too hard. 



  • @SpectateSwamp said:

    Any kind of bird should do?
     

    How is it that the one time you use a question mark, you aren't asking a question? 



  • @MasterPlanSoftware said:

     @ZippoLag said:

     

     


  • @ArieLex said:

    This thread is amazing. From crappy software, via holey stones, to 1-pixel Ufo's. What will be next, and do we really want to know?

    Don't forget the dino bones/skins.

    This thread truly is amazing. I eagerly await the next bit of madness.

    @SpectateSwamp said:

    To capture these Aliens. You'd need to train a bird to spring the trapdoor. They are the only ones that can see these intruders in realtime. Any kind of bird should do?

    Swampy, can you please make a video of yourself building/using a bird-operated trapdoor? Bonus points if you have video of the alien that you manage to capture. As for the type of bird, wouldn't that white hooded crow be best since then your stones can aid it somehow?



  • @SpectateSwamp said:

    Bird sees alien
     

    So what? Can you prove that the tiny speck is an alien and not, e.g., dust on your camera lens? I've taken pictures which had strange specks, but they turned out to be dirt on the camera lens...

     

    @SpectateSwamp said:

    ]To capture these Aliens. You'd need to train a bird to spring the trapdoor. They are the only ones that can see these intruders in realtime. Any kind of bird should do?

     


    And still, you have NOT answered the question which CodeSimian asked (i.e. WAS IT YOUR CAMCORDER OR SSDS THAT "CAPTURED" THE "ALIEN" FOOTAGE?). How hard is it to answer an "A or B?" question?

     

    Get a life, SpectateSwamp.      



  •  @Renan_S2 said:

    When all you have is a hammer 9th Grade. education, all problems start looking like your fingers Desktop. Search.   

    Thought I would help you out with your signature.



  • @MasterPlanSoftware said:

    Thought I would help you out with your signature.
     

     

    OK, much appreciated, thank you. 



  • @SpectateSwamp said:

    To capture these Aliens. You'd need to train a bird to spring the trapdoor. They are the only ones that can see these intruders in realtime. Any kind of bird should do?

     

    Actually, you're wrong. I can see why you've made the error, because you're obviously not a trained zoologist and you have no background in image analysis- allow me to help.

     

     

    At first glance, to the untrained eye, the above image does in fact appear to be a bird, seated on a power line, looking at an alien.

    But using a US government-issue reductive AI rescaling anti-compression refactoring algorithm, we can ENHANCE the image in order to see the true nature of what you've captured here.

    Following the ENHANCE, anyone with an advanced degree in simian macrobiology will see the error!

    It's pretty clear when you know what you're looking for, but I can see that without a detailed study of the creature's behavioral patterns some confusion could remain. So, to help out, I ran the ENHANCEd image through a triple-gaussian bi-dispersive correctional filter, adjusted the qualitative bias, lightened the de-contrastive alpha channels, and de-conglomoralated the minor distortions throughout.

    You see here that what you had taken to be a common species of bird is clearly a Hoffman's Sloth. It's an easy mistake to make, without access to government-standard image ENHANCE or the ability to autodeidefenestrate.

     

    Now you know, and knowing is half the battle! 



  • @rc_pinchey said:

    It's an easy mistake to make, without access to government-standard image ENHANCE or the ability to autodeidefenestrate.
     

    SSDS could have done that.

    Spectate just didn't want you to be jealous of SSDS's image enhancement feature:  hh%r4 hnd9 and Jam it!



  • BirdWatcher needed. Sparrow expert preferred

    @aleph said:

    Swampy, can you please make a video of yourself building/using a bird-operated trapdoor? Bonus points if you have video of the alien that you manage to capture. As for the type of bird, wouldn't that white hooded crow be best since then your stones can aid it somehow?
    We need a birdwatcher to tell us what's going on in the Sparrows mind. Is He frightened or what. Anybody wanting to use Swamp Search to slow down images try this:

     0:19.04 thru 0:20.12 seconds
     
     photo 12Jun2003 speck checks out sparrow contact start==18000 wait=5.55 demo13_pict7 speed=125
     xxx.c:\search\mpeg\demo13_pict7.mpg
     
     ======================================================================
     To play the whole video in slow motion. When you are doing the initial check deactivate the start== and wait= as below

     photo 12Jun2003 speck checks out sparrow contact staart==18000 waait=5.55 demo13_pict7 speed=125
     xxx.c:\search\mpeg\demo13_pict7.mpg

    The "photo" is needed somewhere on the first line.

    The "xxx." is needed at the start of the 2nd line.

    The speed=125 plays it back at about 1/10 speed

    again the original video is at:

    the scene is at: 20.01

    Bird spots intruder

     



  • @SpectateSwamp said:

    We need a birdwatcher to tell us what's going on in the Sparrows mind. Is He frightened or what.
     

    Has it ever occurred to you that the bird might just be looking to the right, and at nothing in particular?

    I mean, really you are fucking stupid.

    @SpectateSwamp said:

    Anybody wanting to use Swamp Search to slow down images try this

    NOBODY would EVER use SSDS to look at this video. It is the worst possible tool for the job.

    You might as well use a philips screwdriver to turn a hex head bolt. Somehow I don't doubt you would try...

     

    Fucking idiot.



  • @SpectateSwamp said:

    photo 12Jun2003 speck checks out sparrow contact start==18000 wait=5.55 demo13_pict7 speed=125
     xxx.c:\search\mpeg\demo13_pict7.mpg
     
     ======================================================================
     To play the whole video in slow motion. When you are doing the initial check deactivate the start== and wait= as below

     photo 12Jun2003 speck checks out sparrow contact staart==18000 waait=5.55 demo13_pict7 speed=125
     xxx.c:\search\mpeg\demo13_pict7.mpg

     

    Fucking hell, I'd almost forgotten quite how shit SSDS actually was. Thanks for the timely reminder! 

     

    So, let me get this straight... to turn on slow-motion, you have to type the speed as a number, where 125 is 10%, and full speed is... 1250? 12.5? WTF?

    You have to type "photo" on the first line, when you're not looking at or searching or doing ANYTHING which is in ANY way related to a photo.

    You type an arbitrary string description of the scene- what is this? A tag? A filename? Part of the index?

    To start at a certain point in the file, you set the start point to 18000. 18000 WHAT??? Seconds? Milliseconds? Frames? Bytes? 

    You set "wait" to 5.55. What the fuck is "wait"? Why do you set it? Again, 5.55 of what unit? Is that a lot, or not much?

    When assigning "start", you use a double equals. When assigning "wait", you use a single equals. No justification for this can possibly exist. 

    The second line has to start with "xxx." for no discernable reason. I can only assume that... no, I can't even think of anything to assume. 

    You have to type in the full path and filename- even though you've already typed the filename on the previous line. How many fucking times do you have to be told that it is NOT a desktop search application if you have to TELL it where the file is because the application is unable to search for the file.

    To turn OFF "start", you type "start" again with an extra "a", assigning the same value as you did previously.

    Just in case the casual observer assumed the above was a typo, to turn off "wait" you again type "wait" with an extra "a" assigning the same altered value as in the original command.

     

    It's actually debatable whether anything less worthwhile than SSDS has ever been done by anyone in the history of software engineering. Your application, and by association your life, is a failed and worthless piece of nonsensical drivel. You've certainly picked the perfect place to showcase it.



  • I've got to say this again, as the sheer boundless stupidity of it has overwhelmed me utterly.

    <font color="red" size="4">In order to turn off "start" and "wait", you retype the command which enabled them, but with the addition of a second "a".</font>

     

    Congratulations, Spectate Swamp, your user interface is perfectly wrong. 



  • @SpectateSwamp said:

    We need a birdwatcher to tell us what's going on in the Sparrows mind.
     

    You are a birdwatcher, remember?  You tell us what's going on in its mind.  Somehow I have the feeling its got more going on up there than you do.

    @SpectateSwamp said:

    Is He frightened or what

    I sure am frightened.   Terrified Even.  That such Utter and complete Stupidity. Could Exist.

     @SpectateSwamp said:

    Anybody wanting to use Swamp Search to slow down images try this:

    [SNIP: USELESS INSTRUCTIONS]

    the scene is at: 20.01

    Nobody wants to use Swamp Search.  NOBODY.   You are basically asking us to use SSDS to "edit" your video by playing selected portions at a certain rate of speed.  WHY DON'T YOU JUST EDIT THE VIDEO YOURSELF, SIMPLETON?  You even admitted in another thread that video editors are useful for "viewing of digital artifacts" (which we understand to mean "aliens").  

    You have no problem doing a "screen re-shoot" of video, or using SSDS to play back selected segments, but you are vehemently opposed to using a video editor?  Or could it be that you are just too stupid and incompetent to use an editor yourself?  Perhaps your twisted mind has fabricated an enormous rationalization ("video editing is evil") to hide this fact from yourself.



  • Ok. I am seriously considering registering and starting a site: www.thestupidestmanonearth.com

    If I set it up as a wiki, could I count on others to help me with chroniciling the life and times of the feature person (Spectate of course)?

    We could use a lot of the crap he has posted online as a good start, plus all the data we have collected by research.

     

    I bet it would get decent traffic. We could probably even fund it with t-shirt and coffee mug sales!

     

    Does this sound like a worthwhile venture? Any takers?



  •  Maybe if we call him SpectaateSwaamp he'll go away!



  • @MasterPlanSoftware said:

    Ok. I am seriously considering registering and starting a site: www.thestupidestmanonearth.com

    If I set it up as a wiki, could I count on others to help me with chroniciling the life and times of the feature person (Spectate of course)?

     

    Dude, Spectate could probably do that all by himself, and he'd thank you for it.  This is the same guy who proudly posts links to threads, videos, pics, and articles which make him look stupid and insane.

    I don't think you'll be starved for content. 



  • @rc_pinchey said:

    I've got to say this again, as the sheer boundless stupidity of it has overwhelmed me utterly.

    <font color="red" size="4">In order to turn off "start" and "wait", you retype the command which enabled them, but with the addition of a second "a".</font>

     

    Congratulations, Spectate Swamp, your user interface is perfectly wrong. 

     

    To be fair, I think he's trying to say that you retype/paste the same command, but purposely misspell "start" and "wait" so the options don't take effect.  Sort of like commenting out lines in a script, except an order of magnitude more retarded.

    I hate to say it, but some of Spectate's apparent WTF-ery is really attributable to abysmal communication skills.   (The rest is due to batshit insanity, of course.)



  • @CodeSimian said:

    Dude, Spectate could probably do that all by himself, and he'd thank you for it.  This is the same guy who proudly posts links to threads, videos, pics, and articles which make him look stupid and insane.

    I don't think you'll be starved for content. 

     

    He could supply content, but he couldn't make it the way we could...

    I don't even care about humiliating him, you just cannot do it. He is really THAT stupid.


    The point is that it would be a funny site, and I bet it could be quite popular.

    What do you think?



  • @CodeSimian said:

    To be fair, I think he's trying to say that you retype/paste the same command, but purposely misspell "start" and "wait" so the options don't take effect.  Sort of like commenting out lines in a script, except an order of magnitude more retarded.
     

    Right, and they aren't commands, they are lines in the control file he uses... because he is really that goddamn dumb where he doesn't even seem to understand the difference/purpose of config files and commands.



  • @MasterPlanSoftware said:

    The point is that it would be a funny site, and I bet it could be quite popular.

    What do you think?

    It's a cool idea - I'm impressed by your initiative.  Personally I think we will all get sick of him eventually, though.  He has really mentioned ALL of this sh-t in several forums over the past couple of years, even though it seems fresh to us:

    1) SSDS

    2) "Videoing in" your family pictures and books instead of scanning them

    3) "Biggie Flatten 'Em Stones"

    4) Alien specks

    If you scratch the surface, I don't know if there's much underneath.  (Except a gibbering lunatic). 

     



  • @MasterPlanSoftware said:

    The point is that it would be a funny site, and I bet it could be quite popular.

    What do you think?

     

    If Swampy agrees, it's a genius idea.

     

    What do you think, Swampy? Do you like the idea of having a website just about you, where people can download SSDS and the world can see your alien pictures? Where thousands of people can read what you have to say? 

     

     

    edit: I wonder if Swampy would pay the hosting fees?  ;-) 



  • @rc_pinchey said:

    @MasterPlanSoftware said:

    The point is that it would be a funny site, and I bet it could be quite popular.

    What do you think?

     

    If Swampy agrees, it's a genius idea.

     

    What do you think, Swampy? Do you like the idea of having a website just about you, where people can download SSDS and the world can see your alien pictures? Where thousands of people can read what you have to say? 

     

     

    edit: I wonder if Swampy would pay the hosting fees?  ;-) 

     

    I don't even want it to be a platform for that lunatic. I want it to be basically biographical, listing his rants and raves as viewed 'in nature'. 

     

    Good user contributed stores that thread together all of the ridiculous ideas, stories, contradictions and lies that are the great bearded one...

    Stuff like that. I think Spectate would love it even though it would be clearly making fun of him, but he doesn't get it anyway.

    Still think it is a good idea?



  • @SpectateSwamp said:

    Anybody wanting to use Swamp Search to slow down images try this:
     

     

    Nobody, except you, wants to. Get over it, dammit. Now, let me go back to using a screwdriver to hammer in some nails...


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