IT marketing dictionary
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Let's just accept some words lost their original meaning, I'll start:
Cloud - any server on the internet
Platform - any kind of product
MPx - a media player capable of performing x functions
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The two terms I hate the most are "framework" and "solution".
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@anonymous234 framework and platform used to mean something you use as a base to build a product, but now any product is a platform.
is a rain protection platform.
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@anonymous234 said in IT marketing dictionary:
The two terms I hate the most are "framework" and "solution".
We have a solution framework.
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@fbmac
Text message - a message containing pictures of cartoon faces, hand gestures, eggplants, smiling piles of poop, but no actual text.
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@fbmac said in IT marketing dictionary:
Cloud - any server on the internet
While I agree there is lots of meaningless jargon around the advertisement of these services. Cloud Services are quit a bit more than that tbh.
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@lucas1 Tell that to our marketers.
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@anonymous234 said in IT marketing dictionary:
The two terms I hate the most are "framework" and "solution".
At least "framework" sometimes makes sense as a technical term (framework vs. library). "Solution" is 100% useless marketing jargon.
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@asdf said in IT marketing dictionary:
"Solution" is 100% useless marketing jargon.
Tell that to the Jews.
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@loopback0
9 posts until Godwin happened.
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SaaS - we charge for something and we run it in our Cloud Platform aka we run our product on some kind of internet connected server thingy
PaaS - we charge for something, it's our product, you connect through the internet to it
Server - something that works without a monkey at the keyboard
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@Luhmann It's just XaaS now.
XaaS - we charge you for everything that you could probably do yourself
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@loopback0 said in IT marketing dictionary:
XaaS - we charge you for everything that you could probably do yourself but we connect it to the internetz
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@Luhmann not even a requirement now. See: private cloud.
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@loopback0
I suck at marketing!
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@Luhmann or just use our server on the internet because nobody knows how to install this thing
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support - it means everything now
footprint as "file size / memory usage"
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@Adynathos said in IT marketing dictionary:
support - it means everything now
What you think it means as a customer: these smucks are going to obey our every wish
What you think it means as a seller: let's slab together a manual and a FAQ and route all calls to farawayistan
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@Luhmann said in IT marketing dictionary:
What you think it means as a customer: these smucks are going to obey our every wish
What you think it means as a seller: let's slab together a manual and a FAQ and route all calls to farawayistanThat is the sane meaning that I approve of.
But it becomes a very confusing term when discussing software:Soon, when you buy a new PC, it won't support Windows 7 or 8. Microsoft has announced a change to its support policy that lays out its plans for future updates to its older operating systems
Going forward, as new silicon generations are introduced, they will require the latest Windows platform at that time for support
The author tries to fight the jargon and formulates a hypothesis as to what that might mean in real words:
Microsoft and its partners will not be putting in the significant work necessary to make new hardware work with older versions of Windows. The old operating systems, at best, will merely lack the latest updates. At worst, they might not function properly.
So why not say that in the first place?
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@HardwareGeek If you really think that you are a moron.
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@dkf said in IT marketing dictionary:
@dse said in IT marketing dictionary:
FaaSaaS
WTFaaSaaS
Now that is a good service I would pay for!
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@dse said in IT marketing dictionary:
@loopback0 said in IT marketing dictionary:
We have a solution framework.
FaaS
FaaSaaS@dkf said in IT marketing dictionary:
@dse said in IT marketing dictionary:
FaaSaaS
WTFaaSaaS
Now you're thinking like Marketing people!
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@loopback0 We have a solution framework solution framework solution framework solution framework solution framework service.
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@loopback0 said in IT marketing dictionary:
@Luhmann It's just XaaS now.
XaaS - we charge you for everything that you could probably do yourself
So marketing people just reinvented the idea of service, a concept as old as economy itself, and pretend it's something new.
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@sloosecannon unless it's a properly orchestrated microservice solution on a serverless cloud framework you're obviously
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@sloosecannon said in IT marketing dictionary:
@loopback0 We have a solution framework solution framework solution framework solution framework solution framework
...MUSHROOM, MUSHROOM!
Filed under:
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ARGH! IT'S A !
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@anonymous234 said in IT marketing dictionary:
So marketing people just reinvented the idea of service
<response type="serious">
Strictly, it's about short-term renting. Which has been around since about as long as the idea of services, but wasn't common in computing prior to that; there's a big business difference between renting by the hour and by the year. Except it's in some senses a return to some of the business practices that were present prior to when most places could afford a computer and would instead send their computation tasks to a specialist Computer Bureau.History doesn't exactly repeat itself, but it does rhyme a lot.
</response>
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@HardwareGeek said in IT marketing dictionary:
@loopback0 said in IT marketing dictionary:
private cloud.
A big disk in an external enclosure.I've seen advertising for "in premise cloud". WTF is that if not a server in your own server room?
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@Jaloopa said in IT marketing dictionary:
WTF is that if not a server in your own server room?
Plus virtualisation!
(The aim is to use provisioning technologies developed to support clouds in situations where there's a single owner. Makes sense for large businesses, which are usually structured as a bunch of smaller businesses that mostly hate each other's guts…)
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@Jaloopa said in IT marketing dictionary:
. WTF is that if not a server in your own server room?
Servers maintained by someone who understands servers in one team, while the applications are run by people who understand applications in another team, without bottlenecks between them while the app guys wait for new servers to be provisioned.
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@Jaloopa said in IT marketing dictionary:
I've seen advertising for "in premise cloud". WTF is that if not a server in your own server room?
???
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@Adynathos I think it's pretty established as far as consumer software goes that "unsupported" means "might work, but if it doesn't you're on your own".
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@Maciejasjmj said in IT marketing dictionary:
might work, but if it doesn't you're on your own
And that is what makes me angry, because there is a critical difference between:
- I did not try
- I did not try but I know someone who did, ask him
- I tried and it works fine, but I am not paid to help with it
- I tried and it crashed
- The core architecture of the software prevents it from working in that situation
Similar with I ran into some problems - either say what exactly is the problem or don't write at all.
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@loopback0 said in IT marketing dictionary:
@Luhmann It's just XaaS now.
XaaS - we charge you for everything that you could probably do yourself
In others words, an HPC.
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@dcon said in IT marketing dictionary:
In others words, an HPC.
I learned the term from a certain consultancy firm that has a name similar to Accident... so yeah.
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I dislike ambiguous terms in general.
For example, "ERP" and "CRM". Yes, they do have meanings, but at the same time they're such a wide concept that they tell you basically nothing about the product.
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@anonymous234 we have a team making a "digital platform".