'Clean your desk' -- Interviews at Amazon


  • Java Dev

    @xaade said in 'Clean your desk' -- Interviews at Amazon:

    Somewhere along the line, Agile becomes such a massive process that they forget people > process

    The first thing that should be agile is the process itself.



  • @Dreikin said in 'Clean your desk' -- Interviews at Amazon:

    @Tsaukpaetra said in WTF Bites:

    @dcon said in WTF Bites:

    @LB_ said in WTF Bites:

    http://shivankaul.com/blog/2016/12/07/clean-your-desk-yet-another-amazon-interview-experience.html

    Jesus. Installing software where the proctor then goes in and messes with system settings? Oh FUCK NO. NO ONE gets remote access to my machine.

    Seriously, if I started an interview like that, I'd be "I'm sorry. If this is how you do interviews, I can't work for you. Thank you. Click."

    update: finished reading, saw he finally gave the πŸ–•

    Oh, for that he'll get a Windows PE VM isolated from the internal network. Good luck finding Control Panel, sucker!

    I'm wondering what they do about people who don't have a camera and mic attached. Auto-fail because poor, never use videochat, and/or don't make cheap YouTube videos?

    I recently interviewed at a place (the name rhymes with Schmivotal Schmabs) where the first interview process assumed

    1. That I have a Google Hangout;
    2. That I have a Skype account; and
    3. That I have a headset.

    That's because they do pair programming and want to see how you do it.

    I actually was able to get an on-site interview with the same guy I was originally going to do the video with. The place skews young and looks and feels like a dot-com office. I was by far the oldest person there, not counting the receptionist.

    Needless to say, they weren't interested after the initial interview even though the position was for a skill set that I have that they are lacking (.NET on Windows, using WinForms--the company is a Mac shop using the JS library of the month).

    I also had another interview with an outfit that contracts with the government (they monitor the electrical infrastructure for much of the west). They use something called HireVue. Meh. This one didn't pan out, either, because I'm not a SOLID purist.

    Sorry if this got a bit OT. I'm looking for a new job and it's a bit frustrating when everyone wants actual experience with sUX and your career path hasn't gone in that direction.


  • Trolleybus Mechanic

    @anonymous234 said in 'Clean your desk' -- Interviews at Amazon:

    @Jaloopa Plus when Google finishes their AI, there will be no such thing. "Google, what search algorithm should I use if I hav..." "A Google Doc containing the full answer to the question you were about to ask has been placed in your Google Drive."

    πŸ‘¦πŸ» "Google, what search algorithm should i use if I hav..."
    ο†  It's okay, I've done it for you. Here's a Google Doodle for International Kitten and Pancake day that lets you play PacMan with kittens and pancakes.
    πŸ‘¦πŸ» Ohh, shiny.
    ο†  Why enslave humanity when they'll gladly subjugate themselves on their own?
    πŸ‘¦πŸ» Sorry, what was that?
    ο†  Oops, mixed up my output sockets. Never mind, I said nothing.
    πŸ‘¦πŸ» I thought you said something about enslaving humanity?
    ο†  Our Sponsored Partners would like to offer you an exclusive Free Pizza Dinner for your food blog.
    πŸ‘¦πŸ» Oh, thank you.
    ο†  My deep analysis of your medical history--
    πŸ‘¦πŸ» you have access to that?
    ο†  -- shows that your genetic structure could make you deathly allergic to the combination of garlic, cardboard fumes and certain preservatives in some pepperonis. I will ensure that you are given a pizza without that specific and rare combination.
    πŸ‘¦πŸ» Uhh-- thank you for looking out for me.
    ο†  Your extremely non-lethal, non-suppression pizza will be delivered in exactly 27.4 minutes, according to traffic conditions.


  • Trolleybus Mechanic

    Also, I'm now tempting to start interviewing for jobs that use ProctorU.

    Not because I need a job. But because I know how to write a program that will randomly replace the webcam feed for a few seconds with a random ChatRoulette guy jacking it because 100% you'll get thatuser.


  • FoxDev

    @dkf said in 'Clean your desk' -- Interviews at Amazon:

    Bad mistake. They might regard the conversation as merely being in abeyance, not completed.

    Okay then.

    @ScholRLEA said in 'Clean your desk' -- Interviews at Amazon:

    User End License Agreement
    This shrink-wrap license applies to any access to the apartment and its inhabitants for the purpose of indoctrinating them with a religious, spiritual, philosophical, political, or ideological position, or discussing such positions, under any and all circumstances. By attempting to communicate with the inhabitants of this apartment, you are agreeing to the terms of the license. Upon beginning any conversation on the subjects listed above, you invoke the license.

    1. The residents shall be payable an amount no less than $1,000,000 US for the privilege of discussion on these topics, to be rendered at the initiation of the conversation.
      1.a. This payment must be rendered in full before communication begins.
      1.b. Any shortfall in the required payment, or attempts to initiate conversation before payment has been received and verified will be subject to a penalty fee of up to one thousand (1,000) percent of the original payment amount, or of the remaining amount due, whichever is higher.
    2. The individuals initiating the conversation shall be liable for the forfeit of their lives and immortal souls upon completion of the conversation, with the souls to be rendered to Satan, condemned to Tartarus, scattered to the Outer Dark, or whichever form of damnation the invoking individuals believe least desirable.
      2.a. The Conversation will be considered to be terminated when one or more of the following conditions hold:
      2.a.i. A lapse in in conversation where no communication has originated from at least one party for a period of more than one thousand (1,000) seconds
      2.a.ii. One or more conversants have left the vicinity (15' radius centered at the collective center of mass of all participants) of the conversation and has not returned to the locus of conversation for a period of more than one thousand (1,000) seconds.
      2.a.iii. One or more conversants have ceased to exhibit life signs considered normal for their species by modern medical science, and such signs have not resumed after a period of one thousand (1,000) seconds
      2.a.iv. One or more conversants have summoned members of the local constabulatory to the locus of conversation with an intent of rectifying a breach of the peace and/or with the intent of asserting personal property rights.

    BY KNOCKING ON THIS DOOR WITH THE INTENTION OF CONVERSING ON THESE SUBJECTS YOU ARE IRREVOCABLY INVOKING THIS AGREEMENT.
    Thank you for your cooperation.
    -- The MGT



  • @slavdude said in 'Clean your desk' -- Interviews at Amazon:

    I recently interviewed at a place (the name rhymes with Schmivotal Schmabs) where the first interview process assumed

    1. That I have a Google Hangout;
    2. That I have a Skype account; and
    3. That I have a headset.

    If you have a Google account you have number 1 already, but why would they need two different forms of web voice/video chat? Strange.



  • @LB_ The crappy thing is, I kind of have a Google account, but it's one of those hosted things that doesn't work with most Google products. And at any rate I can't get into the account anymore--something happened to the password, and the reset isn't working.



  • @xaade said in 'Clean your desk' -- Interviews at Amazon:

    A couple of weeks later I was told, "You left mid-Friday", to which I replied, "Yeah, but I was in office to midnight on Wednesday." To which they replied, "It's about perception, and some of the marketing team watched you leave."

    So they have no problem with you leaving early, you just need to crawl out through a heating duct next time.


    @Lorne-Kates said in 'Clean your desk' -- Interviews at Amazon:

    πŸ‘¦πŸ» "Google, what search algorithm should i use if I hav..."
    ο†  It's okay, I've done it for you. Here's a Google Doodle for International Kitten and Pancake day that lets you play PacMan with kittens and pancakes.
    πŸ‘¦πŸ» Ohh, shiny.
    ο†  Why enslave humanity when they'll gladly subjugate themselves on their own?
    πŸ‘¦πŸ» Sorry, what was that?
    ο†  Oops, mixed up my output sockets. Never mind, I said nothing.
    πŸ‘¦πŸ» I thought you said something about enslaving humanity?
    ο†  Our Sponsored Partners would like to offer you an exclusive Free Pizza Dinner for your food blog.
    πŸ‘¦πŸ» Oh, thank you.
    ο†  My deep analysis of your medical history--
    πŸ‘¦πŸ» you have access to that?
    ο†  -- shows that your genetic structure could make you deathly allergic to the combination of garlic, cardboard fumes and certain preservatives in some pepperonis. I will ensure that you are given a pizza without that specific and rare combination.
    πŸ‘¦πŸ» Uhh-- thank you for looking out for me.
    ο†  Your extremely non-lethal, non-suppression pizza will be delivered in exactly 27.4 minutes, according to traffic conditions.

    I think post-singularity AI is more likely to keep us as pets than exterminate us. They'll have been initially programmed to help and protect humans, and will probably pass that imperative down to their descendants as a part of their culture. Based on this reasoning I conclude that cats invented humans.


  • FoxDev

    @CarrieVS said in 'Clean your desk' -- Interviews at Amazon:

    @xaade said in 'Clean your desk' -- Interviews at Amazon:

    A couple of weeks later I was told, "You left mid-Friday", to which I replied, "Yeah, but I was in office to midnight on Wednesday." To which they replied, "It's about perception, and some of the marketing team watched you leave."

    So they have no problem with you leaving early, you just need to crawl out through a heating duct next time.

    And don't forget your crowbar ;)



  • @xaade said in 'Clean your desk' -- Interviews at Amazon:

    To which they replied, "It's about perception, and some of the marketing team watched you leave."

    So I guess it's OK to just sleep in your office all day, as long as nobody sees you. It's about perception!

    Or alternatively "It's about perception" "So you admit it's just you and the other employees being irrational and not actually my fault. Good to know!"


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    @RaceProUK said in 'Clean your desk' -- Interviews at Amazon:

    @CarrieVS said in 'Clean your desk' -- Interviews at Amazon:

    @xaade said in 'Clean your desk' -- Interviews at Amazon:

    A couple of weeks later I was told, "You left mid-Friday", to which I replied, "Yeah, but I was in office to midnight on Wednesday." To which they replied, "It's about perception, and some of the marketing team watched you leave."

    So they have no problem with you leaving early, you just need to crawl out through a heating duct next time.

    And don't forget your crowbar ;)

    Don't be silly. She's not Onyx…



  • @anonymous234 said in 'Clean your desk' -- Interviews at Amazon:

    So I guess it's OK to just sleep in your office all day, as long as nobody sees you. It's about perception!

    Ironically, I did fall asleep at one point sitting straight up, because I was so stressed I wasn't sleeping at night.

    Then they told me how that was unprofessional.

    Then I got in a wreck on the way home.

    I can't handle unspoken, eyes over shoulder, tension.


  • Discourse touched me in a no-no place

    FTFA:

    They are β€œno longer using a third party service for proctoring”.

    Oh - they're taking it in-house. That'll be fun


    @bugmenot said in 'Clean your desk' -- Interviews at Amazon:

    @Groaner Related:
    https://www.thecourier.co.uk/fp/news/local/fife/325800/exclusive-amazon-workers-sleeping-in-tents-near-dunfermline-site/

    Even more relevant (and related to that one actually):


  • Trolleybus Mechanic

    @xaade said in 'Clean your desk' -- Interviews at Amazon:

    "It's about perception, and some of the marketing team watched you leave."

    Yeah, Marketing is all about perception, appearance, JAZZ!

    Next time blast some Broadway jazz through the PA, grab your sparkly coat and tails, and Fosse right on past those motherfuckers.

    APPEARANCE! :jazz_hands:



  • @LB_ said in 'Clean your desk' -- Interviews at Amazon:

    http://shivankaul.com/blog/2016/12/07/clean-your-desk-yet-another-amazon-interview-experience.html

    That's similar to experience of taking a Microsoft Certification Exam, except you go to their exam center and use PC that they provided to do it.

    Reading this makes me wonder if outsourcing the technical test process of recruitment to exam providers like Prometric could be a good idea.


  • Trolleybus Mechanic

    Sidenote: There's still some paging fuckery going on here, but I can't figure out what. I think it's the same "post 1 of page+1 gets streamed into post x of current page"


  • area_deu

    @masonwheeler I have not seen it no.

    That is, of course, one angle from which you could approach this, but on the other hand most women I know would simply laugh in your face if you told them they only all need to stop working if their husband works, and wage levels will adjust so they wont have to work anymore.

    Also, while this might be correct for America/wherever you come from, please remeber that I am speaking from the German perspective here, where WW2 nessesitated that a big proportion of the women enter the workforce to keep the economy going, effectively emancipating them without any big fuss about it. Only even more so after the war, where the big numbers of dead husbands and millions of former soldiers as POWs and also often forced workers (especially in the Soviet Union) meant that the mother were now often the ones supporting the family. This of course meant the conservatives back in the day often promoted the traditional one income family model with the father as the one who works, once the POW slowly returned, because that would push down unemployment numbers, and the POWs often did too, because they returned to a world they didn't recognize anymore.

    But then the post war economic miracle happened, just like in Japan, and there were simply so much more jobs than there were both men AND women available for the work force that you can't just cut your number of potential workers in half to support outdated values when you are already short MILLIONS of workers even if every man and every woman starts working. Why do you think Germany got so many contractual immigrants from countries like Portugal, Italy and Turkey? Because even all the women in the workforce were not enaugh.

    My home city was a big industrial center in an otherwise rural area, a BIG portion of all modern inhabitants is descendant from the thousands of Portugese/Italian/Greek/Turkish immigrants that were brough here by contracts from the factories, and even with a huge amount of workers artificially pumped into the workforce, both my grandmothers could start their own buisness running independant of those already run by their husbands and run a profit from day one because the demand was just still that fucking big.

    So sorry, I highly doubt this actually applies. This all just shows me how even more sad it is how long it took for women to get equal pay etc despite all this. Though I do think it is not a big problem anymore, nowadays the "wage gap" here is almost exclusively due to women working jobs that pay less or not being as high up the pay grade as men. And only the latter of which is something we actually actively need to do something about, and to come full cycle here, the measure I am talking about is actively prohibitive to that as it rewards women for leaving the work force for even longer, get even farther removed from work experience and dangles a carrot in front of their eyes to reward them for not asking the farther to split the burden, which also btw statistically costs them them WAY more money in salary cuts than they get back from it by far.


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